“I think it’s time for me to go,” Tamara said.
“You know you can stay here,” Aaron said in a soft voice.
“No, I better go home. I have calls to make in the morning.” She turned to him. “I’m really enjoying spending time with you.”
“Me too! So don’t leave.”
She wanted to leave him, but she couldn’t so she stayed on the couch next to him. She kissed him and pulled him in closer by his collar. “I like you, you know.”
“I like you, too. And I want to tell you right away, I want a woman.”
“You want a woman,” Tamara repeated and laughed at him. The thought of commenting to her after only knowing him for two weeks was extremely funny.
“I do, and I think you are her.” He held her hand and looked at her lovingly. He was genuine. He then leaned over her and kissed her sloppily. Their tongues were moving in different directions. Both of their faces were turning side to side, not exactly getting it right. But it was still a perfect kiss. A kiss that made you want more. Tamara didn’t move as they lay on the sofa in each other’s arms. Aaron’s body was soft and smooth. He had almost no body hair. She took off her shirt and got comfortable. He kissed her all over and pressed his body in and out of hers the entire night on the edge of his sofa.
Tamara opened her eyes and felt someone grabbing her hand. It was Aaron. She was lying in her bed next to his warm body. It felt so good. She didn’t want to move; she felt protected. But at the same time, she wanted him out!
Tamara had been enjoying the past few days and nights she was spending with Aaron, but it was becoming too much. She couldn’t do any work at home with him there. She was starting to feel like he was invading her space. Asking her what she wanted to do for the day he had been with her since their Friday date. It was now Sunday. It was obvious he wanted her to settle down, but she wasn’t ready. She was going to date more than one man. She was going to do that so she wouldn’t get caught up. But when she finally convinced him to go home, he left, grabbed some clothes, and came right back. She was confused. If she didn’t know better she would think she had somehow unknowingly gotten herself a boyfriend by default. Somehow he had worked his way into her life when she was supposed to be remaining focused. She checked her messages and became increasingly mad when she heard all the messages and calls she hadn’t returned because she was playing house. She was supposed to be on her hustle, on her grind with her New York state of mind. She hadn’t done any work since Thursday. And she had only two weeks before the grand opening.
She took a deep breath. It would be okay. She had this when they were just friends, no attachment. She could just stop picking up when he called and allowing herself to be comforted in his big beautiful arms that felt like a headrest. She had to just stop laughing and enjoying his sense of humor and adoring his smile. Yes, all of that would have to stop today.
“Good morning.”
“Hey,” she said.
“Tamara.”
“Yes.”
“I think I might be about to fall in love with you,” he said.
“You’re what?” Tamara was in shock. In love? We just met! Then he asked what she hoped he would never ask. What he wasn’t supposed to ask after only two weeks.
“What are we, Tamara?”
“We are two grown people enjoying each other’s company,” Tamara responded with no hesitation.
“So we are friends.”
“Not exactly.”
“So what would you call us?”
“I don’t know.”
“Because we are more than friends, right? I make love to you and you lie in my arms. Friends don’t do that, right?”
Tamara was at a loss for words. She didn’t know what to say, so she walked out of her room and into her kitchen. She couldn’t believe he was getting soft. Don’t try to put a name on what we have, she thought. That was the woman’s job to start getting insecure about her position and rank in a man’s life. Why was he acting like, for lack of a better word, a bitch? Getting all sappy and love-struck.
“Did you hear me, Tamara?” he said, coming out of her bedroom in his boxers.
“Yes, I heard you.”
“So why didn’t you answer my question?”
“I don’t know what we are,” she said, looking directly at him.
He stared at her with a puzzled look, then finally said, “I’m not going to hold you. You are everything I want my woman to be. You’re sexy, beautiful, and intelligent. I’ve been in this city for years. I dated around and, yes, I had my fun, but now I want to settle down. At the end of my hectic day I want a woman I can trust and come home to.”
“I think everybody wants that, Aaron,” Tamara said, walking back into the bedroom.
“Everybody wants that, but what do you want?” he said, frustrated, as he followed her.
“I came here to this city for a job opportunity. I don’t think I’m in a place in my life where I should make a commitment. I’m not looking for love right now. I don’t even know how long I will be here.”
“Yeah, but you have to have a personal life, too!” he said.
“I don’t have time for a personal life. Do you realize since I’ve been with you I haven’t done any work since Thursday?” she said adamantly.
Aaron took a deep breath. “Is that a no?”
“No, that’s a let me see. Give me a moment. I am really stressed right now. I need some space.”
“I’m going to give you space. But make me a promise.”
“What’s that?” Tamara asked.
“That you will think about us and while I’m giving you this space you won’t date anyone else. At least until after the party.”
“Okay, I promise.” Tamara sat down on the bed.
“You’re not going to date anyone?”
“No one.”
“You promise?”
“I swear,” she said.
He undressed her and began to give her body all the affection that it needed. Every time he entered her body she adored Aaron more. She just wasn’t ready to settle down.
Seth had been getting on Tamara’s nerves. He was a pain in Tamara’s right and left ass cheeks. Seth wanted to be in charge of everything and Tamara wasn’t having it. He even had the nerve to tell her what radio stations she should be using to promote the club, clearly not his job. They argued over everything. Tamara explained to Seth that although he was the club manager the club was not open yet. So therefore he didn’t have anything to manage. The only major contribution Seth brought with him was a bar and restaurant kitchen staff.
“Seth, you can send your people home. The kitchen is not going to be ready, so we do not need a kitchen staff.”
“I’ll send them home after I talk to Maurice.”
“I already spoke with him. He said to send them home.” Tamara didn’t want to go word for word with him, so she took a lunch. Kyra followed behind.
When they returned they noticed a woman going in the club door. Tamara ran up to the half-dressed model with thigh-high boots and said, “May I help you?”
“Yes. Is this where they are holding auditions for the models?”
“What models?”
The woman pulled out a piece of paper and said, “I’m looking for Seth.”
Tamara marched into the club to find a bunch of women waiting. Seth was holding an exotic dancer audition in the middle of the club. There were about twenty girls. None of them were pretty but they were all siliconed up. They all had green and blue contact lenses in and bleached blond hair, all ranging in color from ebony to super tan. He was making the women dance provocatively and then give simulated lap dances. Tamara walked up to him and said quietly, “Seth, this is inappropriate.”
“Listen, don’t tell me what’s inappropriate. Why don’t you just shut up and sit your ass down?”
“What? Who the hell are you talking to?” Tamara said as she walked up into his face.
He paused momentarily, then said, “You
fucking black bitch” under his breath.
“I know you didn’t just call me a black bitch.”
“Tamara, have a seat. I did not call you a bitch or a black bitch for that matter.”
“You called me a bitch. That’s it. This thing is over. Excuse me, this audition is over. Please leave.”
The women began picking up their stuff and leaving.
Tamara called Maurice immediately and repeated the racial slur Seth had just used.
Maurice was on the premises within fifteen minutes. He came to the club and started yelling. Seth could not get one word in.
“Don’t you ever disrespect this woman. She is in charge and if you can’t handle it, then, oh well. And I know you didn’t call her a bitch. I know she must have been hearing things.”
“Listen, you know I have a certain way of doing things and if I don’t have a say I can’t have my name connected with this club,” Seth shot back.
Maurice then looked directly in his eyes and said, “This is my damn club. If you don’t want to be a part of this, walk out the door.”
For a moment Seth stood still and twisted his lips as if he was thinking about it. Then he held his hand out to Maurice and said, “Brother, it was good working with you.”
Seth tried to shake Maurice’s hand on the way out, but Maurice left him hanging. Seth walked out the door, taking his bartenders and wait staff with him. Tamara didn’t want to be the reason that they didn’t have a club manager, but he was messing shit up. She started to walk away.
Tamara had realized that although she had hated Seth, now she had created more work for herself. Something inside her just went off. She felt sick and out of nowhere she began to start freaking out. The pressure was starting to get to her. Everything was starting to weigh on her shoulders and she could hardly breathe. She was having an anxiety attack, but she didn’t want anyone to know. She went into the bathroom and Kyra followed her as she sagged against the wall. She felt like she was being weak. But she couldn’t be weak. But Tamara needed rest and to relax.
“Are you okay, Tamara?” Kyra asked.
“Yeah? Why, do I look like I’m not okay?”
“You don’t look so good.” Kyra sat Tamara down and Maurice came into the women’s bathroom and suggested that they all take the rest of the day off. As Tamara reluctantly left the building, her phone rang. It was Aaron. “I’m on my way home to get some rest. I’m having a bad day and feeling really out of it. I’ll talk to you later,” she said abruptly before hanging up. She just couldn’t deal with one more thing today, not even Aaron.
Tamara went to her apartment and took a long, hot shower, but it did nothing to end her fatigue. She was so tired and didn’t want to think about the work she had in front of her. Less than two weeks to go and now, thanks to her, they didn’t even have a club manager. Oh, God, she thought, this is going to be a disaster. She wrapped a towel around her and exited the bathroom and headed straight for the bed. All thoughts could wait until tomorrow. Her head was pounding so hard she couldn’t think anyway. She hadn’t closed her eyes but five minutes before her telephone started ringing.
“Open up. I’m ringing your doorbell.”
Tamara slipped on a robe and went to answer her front door. Maurice followed her into the apartment.
“What are you doing here?” she said as she leaned weakly against a wall.
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” he said, standing in the doorway.
“I’m fine.”
“You sure?” he said, looking into her eyes. He gave her a kiss and held her body right in her doorway. Tamara was so vulnerable and felt like she wanted to invite him in, but that would be wrong. He would never respect her. Just as she argued with herself about holding Maurice while she was half naked she heard the front door open. The lock must not have caught after she’d let Maurice in.
“Tamara,” Aaron called out as he walked through the hallway toward her apartment. He stopped when he saw her and Maurice in the doorway. She pulled away from Maurice and looked over at Aaron. He stood there frozen for a moment, then ran back down the hallway and out the front door. Tamara tried to run after him, but Maurice grabbed her arm.
“Let him go. I’ll stay with you.”
Tamara’s eyes narrowed as she looked at him. How the hell was it that she was about to be so weak? she wondered. She told him to leave, then pushed him out of the doorway to show she was serious. This was the second reality check she’d had with him.
She threw on her jeans and ran out in the street with just her robe covering her upper body to see if she could catch Aaron. She didn’t have to go far. He was waiting on the corner trying to flag down a cab.
He looked up when he heard her. “So I guess that was your idea of going home and relaxing?”
“Listen, that was my boss checking up on me.”
“Don’t explain. It’s my fault. You told me from the beginning that you weren’t interested. I should have respected that.”
“Aaron, listen.” He began walking away. She wanted to run after him, but she didn’t know what she could say, and besides, she felt too weak. She was so sorry he was upset, but come on. He had known her all of two weeks and he wanted to settle down. She told him that was not what she wanted and he didn’t listen. It wasn’t her fault he got hurt. She leaned on the concrete banister and started back up the steps.
“Hey, nice outfit you got there,” Jerome said, walking up close to her.
She didn’t feel up to turning around to fix Jerome with a mean mug. As it turned out, she didn’t have to.
“Jerome, leave that damn girl alone,” she heard Margie call out from her window. “You ain’t got nothing better to do than harass my tenants?”
Aaron called her phone nonstop for the next week, but she let his calls go straight to voice mail. He would hang up, cuss her out, hang up, and then call again. So Tamara finally answered her telephone.
“So you finally decided to pick up the telephone?” he asked.
“I can’t deal with this right now,” Tamara said.
“Just answer one question. Maybe I’m tripping. But it seemed like we were on our way somewhere,” Aaron said.
“We were on our way somewhere. Nothing has changed,” Tamara said.
“I asked you if you could not date anyone else until we figure everything out.”
“Yes, I told you I wouldn’t date anyone else and I didn’t. That was my boss.”
“Well, your boss looked real comfortable with you. He was rubbing all up on your ass.”
“Aaron, I am not having this conversation with you. It doesn’t matter anyway.”
“It doesn’t matter? You’re right. It just questions your character. You’re having sex with one man and spending time with him and then you have another coming out of your apartment.”
Aaron was taking it too far. Tamara wasn’t going to sit still and let him tell her how wrong she was. “Don’t disrespect me. You don’t hardly know me.”
“I know that. I really wanted to get to know you, but as soon as we became close you pushed me away.”
“I didn’t push you away and I don’t have to explain. I have to go,” Tamara said as she hung up on him.
He called her right back, and for some reason she decided to pick up even though she could see from the caller ID that it was him.
“So why did you lie to me? You said you weren’t dating anyone.”
“I wasn’t. He is my boss and he is a married man. He was checking on me. I broke down earlier and he sent me home. I’ve been consumed with work. If you can’t understand that, oh well. I know what it looked like but it wasn’t.”
“Wow! You are dating a married man.”
Tamara couldn’t believe the only thing he heard out of everything she just said was “married man.” “No, he is separated, but I still don’t deal with people unless they are one hundred percent honest.”
“Like how you were honest with me, right?” Aaron said.
> “I’m tired. If you’re looking to argue with someone, you’re not going to get it from me.” She hung up on him again. She was tired and not in the damn mood for any bullshit. She had a long day ahead of her.
Still, it was hard for her to shake her guilt. Aaron had been so nice to her, and she was acting like a little bitch. “I’ll send him some flowers, leave a voice mail and an e-mail,” she said out loud. “And whatever he decides to do is on him. I can’t let this effect me anymore. I’ve got a club opening. I have to make it a success.”
It was time for Tamara to put her Superwoman cape on. There were only three days left before the big event. The club still didn’t look like there was going to be a grand opening in a few days. There was still dust everywhere and plastic that needed to be taken off all the chairs. Even the glasses needed to be put up. She hired bartenders and drink waiters through an agency.
She began setting up the tables and chairs herself. Maurice had found a friend who used to own a club to promise to come in on opening night to help with the managing, but she knew most of the load would be on her.
She called Shaunell to confirm she was still going to be her host. But she couldn’t get in touch with the deejay, Problem Child. She had been leaving messages for Aaron, but he hadn’t returned her calls in four days. She was going to leave her last message.
“Aaron, this is Tamara. Please have Problem Child call me. I need to confirm that he will be here.” Tamara hung up the phone.
After they had their little spat Tamara was concerned that Aaron might not help her. She didn’t want to feel like she needed him. She didn’t need him; she didn’t need anyone. Uh-huh. And if she didn’t have a deejay she would be ruined.
“Kyra, grab the Yellow Pages and find me three deejay companies.”
Two hours later she hired a deejay, name Khali, and told him to report to the club at six. She then left a message on Problem Child’s answering machine.
“Hi, Problem Child, this is Tamara from the Onyx Lounge. I won’t be needing your services after all. Thank you, and hopefully we can work again in the future.”
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