by Mj Fields
Tessa wasn’t nervous because it was the same song she had sang alone as a child on stage at vacation bible school in Cape Cod while she stayed with her aunt, Blessed Be Your Name. The song began with Tessa’s solo, and she nailed it. The chorus joined and Jade’s solo was next, she sang softly and sweetly. Tessa smiled at her as the two sang the bridge together, and then squeezed her hand when she was finished. When the song ended Tommy stood up whistling and cheering. Jade’s face turned red, and she grinned at him.
When church ended Tommy and Luke stood in the fellowship room with the congregation feeling a bit out of place. They saw Jade walking up to them. “Hey pretty girl,” Tommy said, “You sang beautifully,” he kissed her cheek.
“Where is Tessa?” Luke asked looking around.
“She’s right over there,” Jade said pointing to her talking to an attractive man who seemed to be in his late twenties. They watched as they laughed and chatted. Then the man hugged Tessa and Luke narrowed his eyes as he walked towards them.
Luke touched Tessa’s back and smiled at her. She smiled back. “Hi, I’m Luke, Tessa’s boyfriend,” Luke said staring in the stranger’s eyes intensely.
“Nice to meet you Luke,” he said shaking his hand. “Tessa you never told me you had a boyfriend,” he added and looked at her. “See you soon Tessa,” he said and kissed her head, “Nice meeting you Luke,” he walked away.
“Hi,” Tessa said smiling at Luke.
“Hi, good job singing,” he said clearly annoyed.
What just happened Tessa thought, “Oh thanks, I guess,” she said.
“What? Tessa, why are YOU acting like that? I am the one who came here to be with you and you’re the one hugging some guy right in front of me,” he said through his teeth. “That’s not how I want my girlfriend to act Tessa,” he said taking her hand and pulling her through the crowd.
She pulled it away from him, glared at him, and walked towards Tommy and Jade. “What were you and Pastor Zach talking about?” Jade asked Tessa smiling.
Luke’s eyes widened as Tessa coolly answered her, “He asked if I would sing at his wedding next fall. Apparently he proposed Friday night.”
“Awesome, she must be so happy,” Jade said smiling.
Tessa wouldn’t look at Luke. Her parents and siblings said they would meet her at home in thirty minutes. “Tessa you sang beautifully,” her Mom said causing Tessa to smile before walking away.
Tessa and Jade went downstairs to hang their robes and the boys followed them. “Want to see the eleventh and twelfth grade classroom? They are pretty cool,” Jade said to the boys.
“I am going to the bathroom, but I’ll be right in,” Tessa said turning to walk away.
She came out to see Luke standing there. “Tessa, I’m sorry I acted like that, but I just can’t stand to see another guy touch you,” he started.
“First of all, you don’t know me, and I certainly don’t know you enough to do this, this thing,” she stuttered as she began to feel her eyes burning and looked away. “My family is falling apart. With that and school, hockey, choir, church, and trying to keep things normal for my little brother and sister,” he bent down to catch her eyes momentarily distracting Tessa. She looked at him, “I’m not ready for this, not now,” she continued as a tear fell down her cheek.
Luke wiped it away and hugged her. She didn’t fight him. “Don’t be sad Tessa. You weren’t sad last night. I am sorry about what just happened. I was being stupid, but this thing, as you call it, Tessa, can be the distraction you need. I’ve been through the family nonsense. Let me help you, I want to help you. I am sorry, please say you’ll forgive me?” he asked pushing her away searching her sad crystal blue eyes.
“Okay, Luke, just don’t be angry at me. Ask me questions, I have never done this; I’ve never been anyone’s girlfriend, but I can tell you I am nothing if not trustworthy and honest,” she said.
Luke kissed her hard and she gasped and his tongue entered her mouth, she fell back into his arms and grabbed his face with her hands and her tongue met his.
“Tessa!” Jade scolded as she saw them kissing.
They jumped away from each other and Tessa looked at Jade and saw her disappointment. Tessa felt bad, she turned to Luke, “That can’t happen again here, okay?” she smiled as she pulled her hair away from her face.
“If you say so,” he smiled back and winked.
~
Dinner with Tessa’s family went alright; they went to the Grill on the lake for dinner. Her mother and father sat at opposite sides of the table and did not speak, or even look at each other very much. Not that it was much different than normal. Dinner ended and they went back to the farm house and had cake. It was a beautiful chocolate cake, one just like Mom made when they were younger, she smiled and looked at her mother, “It’s beautiful, thanks Mom,” she said.
“We helped too,” Jake yelled.
“Well thank you guys too; do you think it tastes as good as it looks?” She said smiling.
They ate cake and ice cream, and then it was time for presents. Her parents gave her a new hockey stick, one that she was admiring at the sporting goods store with her mother while they were school clothes shopping, and money. Her brothers and sister gave her new cleats and beautiful family portraits they had made. She hugged them and thanked them.
“Tessa, I would like you come stay with me one day this week, is that doable?” Maggie asked.
“I guess so, I have a game Tuesday maybe after that,” she said.
Her mother left at 8 o’clock and Tessa helped to get the kids ready for the week. She tucked them in and went downstairs. She grabbed her phone from the counter and looked at her messages,
-you did great today, I think I will be playing piano at the wedding, well have to practice, see you tomorrow…Becca
- You were very naughty at church today :) how was dinner?...Jade
Luke had sent several.
-hope we are ok; sorry for being an ass, just don’t want anyone else touching you…Luke
-how was dinner, everything ok?..Luke
- You sang beautifully today…Luke
-I think I miss you…Luke
-Tessa are you mad at me?...Luke
-alright, I guess you’re busy, see you tomorrow…Luke
She smiled as and texted back
-Things are good, Mom left an hour ago had to get the kids set for tomorrow, left my phone home, see you tomorrow…Tessa
She received an immediate reply,
-sleep well…take that bear with you so you’ll think of me when you fall asleep and not all the other stuff…Luke
- will do..Tessa
Chapter 5
Tessa and Jade were standing at their lockers talking, the boys walked down the hall starring in their direction. Luke had on faded jeans that hung on his hips, he wore a black polo shirt. Tommy was in long khaki cargo shorts and a white tee. Tessa looked around uncomfortably to see who was watching them, everyone in the hall was. Their smirks and gazes gave them away. “Check out the girls,” Tessa whispered to Jade “like they’re fresh meat or something.” Jade laughed and Tessa was annoyed. She grabbed her books for first period and was about to walk away when he grabbed her from behind and turned her towards him.
“Good morning Tessa,” Luke said smiling at her, and then took her hand, “Can I walk you to class?” he asked smiling.
Tessa smiled, “Do you get this reaction often?” she asked looking down the hall.
He looked and laughed, “Tessa you’re dating the quarterback you’ll have to get used to it, let them look, only you can touch,” he kissed her hand, “Want to see them squirm? I’m going to kiss you.”
She didn’t have a chance to respond, his hands were on her face and lips on hers before she had a chance to respond. He slipped his gum in her mouth with his tongue and gently pulled away starring in her eyes, “Check them out now,” he whispered in her ear.
He grabbed her books and then her hand and they walked th
rough the gawking crowd of Luke groupies. She smiled as she looked down.
“You left something in my mouth” she said and laughed.
“Tessa don’t say that,” he looked at her and smirked and Tessa looked confused.
~
Tommy took Jade’s hand, “Good morning pretty girl,” he said.
She hugged him, “Good morning.”
He took her books and they held hands walking down the hall.
At lunch the boys joined them and everyone stared, Jade and Tessa were embarrassed at first but seemed to be getting used to it. After practice they hung out for a bit and they gave them a ride to Tessa’s home.
On Wednesday Tessa went to her mother’s after practice. She walked into the small two bedroom apartment and looked around. She wondered how she could choose to live like this. What the hell had happened to her? Her mom had made French onion soup and a large salad.
“Tessa do you like that boy?” her mother asked.
“Luke is my boyfriend mom,” she said blandly.
“He is cute Tessa,” Maggie said, “Please remember what you were taught.”
“I got it Mom, I’ll try to remember that and not that none of it means anything because after twenty years it won’t matter anymore,” she said sarcastically.
“Tessa, you don’t know what I have lived for those years and I don’t expect you to be happy about it, I do however expect you to be respectful of me as your mother, and respectful of yourself always,” she said.
Tessa excused herself and went into the spare bedroom to do her homework. He sent her a text message.
-how’s it going baby?...Luke
-Baby hu? Lol. As good as could be expected…bored:)…Tessa
-yes baby, my baby;) Sorry to hear that. Sneak out I’ll come get you…Luke
-don’t you have homework? I do lots of it. I will suffer through…Tessa
-All done…want me to come over and do it for you?...Luke
-I would love that however she would not…she asked me about you today…told her that boy was my boyfriend….Tessa
-How did she take it?!?!?....Luke
-as well as could be expected, she’ll get used to it, got to go…babe, see you in the morning…Tessa
-can I pick you up, it’s on my way…Luke
-Alright, she leaves at 7:10…Tessa
~
Luke was at the door at 7:12, “Very punctual,” Tessa said, “please excuse the place.”
“It’s not bad Tessa, I’ve seen worse, so we have half an hour before school starts what do you want to do?” Luke asked.
“I don’t know,” she said as her eyes widened and she looked at the floor.
“Baby look at me, you never have to be nervous around me,” he said she looked at him, “That’s better, now what do you want to do,” he smiled.
“Kiss you because it feels good, but there has to be more than that Luke. I want to know you and your heart too,” No way did that just come out of my mouth, she looked down.
“Look at me baby,” he said lifting her chin, “I have an idea, you ask me a question and then you get to kiss me after I answer, a win, win,” he smiled and winked at her.
Her eyes widened and her mouth slightly opened, “I don’t know about that,” she said and bit her tongue trying to remove the cheesy ass grin on her face.
“Awe, I see, you so want to Tessa, it’s written all over that gorgeous face baby,” he said smiling.
His eyes were sparkling, in fact possibly dancing, he looked so cute. He called her gorgeous. “Okay but we can’t be late for school,” she said trying to act very serious.
He laughed, “You could not lie if you wanted to, sit knee to knee, right here,” They sat on the floor both smiling, “Ask away.”
“Parents divorced or married”, she asked.
“Divorced, since I was three, now my turn,” he said leaning forward and kissing her on the mouth, no tongue, he slowly pulled away making her want more.
“Who do you live with?” she asked.
“My Mom, I see my father once in awhile, he lives in New Jersey, we see each other a few times a year, my turn again,” this time she leaned forward to him, and she kissed him lightly and started to move back. “If that’s all I get we can move to yes or no questions,” he smiled and kissed her lowering her lip with his teeth lightly, he kissed her harder and slowly released her.
She sat back, “So the deeper the question the longer the kiss hu? Okay let’s see, tell me your family dynamics, like parents remarried or not siblings or none.”
He laughed, “Your tough Tessa, and after I answer this one you may want to take a deep breath before I kiss you. My parents divorced because they both had affairs, my mother remarried first to someone younger, they lasted three years, she is a drunk. My father has remarried three times, they get younger every time. He has two kids with wife number four, both girls, one is two, the other three. I see him on occasion and feel like an outsider. He owns a construction company and several properties, he loves to buy my love which at this point I am okay with.”
Tessa took his face and kissed him deeply, her tongue moved into his mouth and she tasted him. She kissed him harder and her tongue pressed harder against him, he groaned, she kissed his face and his neck. She moved up to his ear and pulled his lobe slightly down with her teeth. “Oh Tessa you need to stop,” he said in a gruff voice.
She looked embarrassed, “I’m sorry.”
“No don’t be sorry, baby; I love how curious you are. But it makes me want to do naughty things to you,” he said closing his eyes.
“You want to do naughty things to me?” she asked seriously
“God yes Tessa, you turn me on just by looking at me,” he said and grabbed her by the waist and sat her on his lap. He kissed the back of her head and down her neck, he bit at her ear. Oh she thought that was nice, she leaned her head back and he kissed her hard on the mouth. She grabbed his face and crashed her mouth into his, she began kissing him harder. He lifted her and sat her on the floor. “Wow Tessa what was that?” he asked.
“Was that a question,” she asked him smiling and biting her lip.
“Tessa you’re playing with fire, I am on fire right now,” he said looking down.
“Are we into role playing now? Shall I be the fireman?” she asked and raised her eyebrows.
“Holy fuck Tessa I thought you were a virgin and you’re talking to me like that,” he said in shock.
“I’m sorry Luke I didn’t mean, I’m sorry,” she said and ran to the bathroom and shut the door.
“Damn it Tessa, I am sorry, I didn’t mean to,” he said as he tried to open the door she had locked, “Tessa please open the door.”
She walked out, cleared her throat, “Will you please take me to school, I don’t want to be late,” she said matter of fact.
He grabbed her face “Look at me,” she did and her eyes were angry. “I said I was sorry I just thought because you’d never been kissed you were a virgin, and then you started talking about role play, I thought you wanted to take this slow, I’m sorry.”
“I am a virgin you asshole, you were my first kiss. I watch TV, a virgin not an idiot,” she said and scowled at him. He laughed and she pulled away from him. “Now if you are not going to take me to school then you should leave now.”
“Tessa I am sorry, I have never met anyone like you. And when you’re sitting on my lap kissing me, well you’re kisses do things to me and I want you, but was trying to respect you and not well you know. Damn Tessa you confuse me,” he said searching her face intensely.
“Can we go please we will be late,” she said softly.
“No,” he said and grabbed her shoulders, “Not until I know we are okay,” he said intensely.
“We will be, I am just embarrassed,” she said and put her hands on his waist and looked down.
He pulled her into him and hugged her and kissed her tenderly, “I am sorry Tessa.”
“Me too,” she said, he kiss
ed her again and took her hand, he grabbed her bag and they walked out to the car.
~
They sat in the car and he started it. “Was this from your father?” she asked.
“Yep, for my seventeenth birthday,” he answered as he pulled onto the street.
“He must have been really trying to buy your love that day,” she said and he laughed and grabbed her hand.
“Luke how many girlfriends have you had?” she asked.
“Tessa do you really want to know now or when we have time to play the game again?” he asked attempting to hold off on answering that question.
“Now please,” she asked.
“I really don’t know, lost count,” he said.
“What was the longest relationship?” she asked.
“Tessa do we have to do this now,” he asked looking out of the corner of his eye nervously.
“Yes,” she said.
“Eight months,” Luke answered.
“Was it Sadi?” she asked quietly.
“Yes,” he said pointedly.
“Did you have sex with her?” she asked.
“Tessa…” he started.
“Luke I want to know, please answer my questions,” she asked
“Yes, I did,” he could not believe he was answering this many questions.
“Was she your first?” Tessa asked.
“Really Tessa?” he said as he pulled into the school parking lot.
“Please?” she begged.
“No Tessa, I have had many sexual partners, my first was when I was fourteen,” he said and she gasped, “see we shouldn’t have had this conversation now.”
“How many?” she asked.
“She was twelve” he answered. They got out of the car and started walking in. “They were all before you Tessa and none were at all like you, you’re just… better. I don’t have time to explain it now but I will after school, please don’t be mad,” he said as they walked in.
She gave him a weak smile and a peck on the cheek, “I’m not. See you at lunch.” The bell rang and she ran to her locker and quickly to class.
“Why are you so late?” Jade asked.
“Long story I will tell you later,” she said dismissively.