After Sue left, I went upstairs to pack. I had to admit, I was excited about going back to Key West. There’s nothing like a Key West sunset. Whether watching it from Mallory Square or aboard a sailboat or catamaran, it’s absolutely stunning. Jeremy and I tried to catch it every night when we were there. One night we went on the last snorkeling excursion to the coral reef of the day and caught the sunset on the way back.
I heaved the leather suitcase onto my bed. When I opened it I found Disney park maps from our trip last summer. I guess it was the last time I had used the suitcase. I pulled out my black tankini. Despite working hard to get in shape, I still didn’t feel confident enough to wear a bikini.
After I finished packing, I started to pack for Jeremy. He has the most boring wardrobe in the world. He wears nothing but tan cargo shorts, unless he’s exercising and then he wears Nike nylon shorts.
I dashed off a quick email to Richard, explaining Jeremy and I were going away for several days. I told him I’d contact him when we returned. After listening to his mini lecture as he walked me to my car after running into Jeremy, I knew he’d approve.
***
Jeremy
I had to admit, I was excited about going to Key West. Tess and I hadn’t taken a vacation as a couple since before we had kids. I smiled, remembering the jet ski tour we'd taken around the island. Tess was so pissed because she was thrown off when we hit the choppy Atlantic. She was sore, too, because her pelvic floor pounded against the seat as we flew through the water.
I wasn’t happy Mrs. Geesey called Mom, but maybe the intervention is just what we needed. I hadn’t realized until Jen said it that everyone knew Tess and I were having problems. I thought we had done a pretty good job of concealing it. But, like Jen said, people aren’t dumb. They see through the fog even when you’re lost in it.
None of the other girls in the office said anything about wearing the same clothes two days in a row. I knew if they had noticed it, they’d probably mention it to Jen who’d control the office gossip.
I walked out of my office and past the check-in counter when the phone rang. I could tell from the conversation it was Mrs. Harris. She apparently called to complain her gums were sore from her visit yesterday.
“I’ll take it.” I told Jen. “Transfer it to my office.”
I went back to my office and picked up the phone.
“Mrs. Harris, how is one of my favorite patients?”
“Terrible. My gums hurt. And that floss Sandy gave me is limp and slippery and I don’t like using it.”
I inhaled, trying to figure out what to say so the conversation didn’t drag on. “Are you using the antiseptic mouth wash to gargle?”
“Didn’t see any mouthwash in the bag Sandy gave me.”
“Yes. We have no samples of mouthwash. That’s something you’re going to have to buy.”
“What? No samples of mouthwash? So you make my teeth hurt and then you don’t give me mouthwash to make it better. You make me buy the mouthwash to fix your mistakes.”
“We didn’t make any mistakes, Mrs. Harris. We cleaned your teeth. We removed all of the tartar and plaque. In order to have strong teeth and healthy gums, you need to brush your teeth after every meal, use floss and antiseptic mouthwash.”
There was silence on the other end of the phone.
“Remember the time you called and you thought you had broken your tooth?” I asked.
She didn’t answer.
“You came into the office and it wasn’t your tooth, it was a large piece of tartar. If you don’t take care of your teeth, the plague will eventually turn into tartar. So yesterday we removed all of that from your teeth. Yes, your teeth and gums might be a little sore. But if you adopt the dental habits I’ve asked you to, this wouldn’t be a problem. Now, I have to go. My patient is waiting. Perhaps you ought to consider going to another dentist if you don’t like the care you’re receiving.”
She slammed down the phone without saying a word. Maybe I finally shut the bitch up.
***
Tess
When the kids got home from school, they saw the suitcases sitting by the door.
Katie plopped her backpack on the kitchen table. “Where are we going?”
“We aren’t going anywhere. Your dad and I are going away for a few days. Just the two of us.”
John punched the air. “Home alone here we come.”
I smiled. “Think again. Grandma and Grandpa will soon be here. You’ll stay with them and they’ll make sure you get to and from school.”
John hung his head. “Dang! It’s never like it is in the movies.”
As if on cue, John’s grandparents walked in the door.
“There’s my favorite grandkids,” Harry said.
“We’re your only grandkids,” Katie said.
Diana looked at me. “Can we talk a minute?”
“Come on, kids,” Harry said. “Let’s go pack and give these two time to talk.”
Harry, John and Katie bolted up the stairs.
“I hope you can work things out,” Diana said. “Can I tell you a secret, something I’ve never told anyone?”
I nodded.
“Harry and I had trouble in our marriage, too. Things weren’t always easy. There were times when I was lonely, being home with the kids all day. I resented he had this career and I’d given up mine.”
“You resented it? But Jeremy said you loved being a stay-at-home mom.”
“Correction,” Diana said. “Jeremy liked me being a stay-at-home mom. I did it because it was what Harry wanted and what was best for the kids, or so I thought. But it wasn’t what was best for me. I felt like I died a little each day and the more days that passed the more I resented my life. Of course, I didn’t tell Harry how I felt. I kept it to myself. But I’d pretend to be other people. I'd create these characters and act them out as a way to turn what had been an ordinary life into an extraordinary one. It all seems so silly now, but it was my way of coping.”
“So what happened?”
“In time, my fake world became my real world and I knew I needed help. It was a long road back. Harry helped.”
“So he knew?”
“Eventually. You can’t keep a secret like that from your husband forever. We went to counseling. Harry paid more attention to me and the kids. And I found an outlet for my creativity, which gave me a purpose.”
“What sort of outlet?”
“I wrote. I began writing fiction. At first, it was short stories. Then I tried writing a novel.”
“You wrote a novel?”
“Several,” Diana said. “I’m Kristin Cavanaugh.”
“The romance novelist?”
“The one and only.”
“Oh. My. God. Does Jeremy know?”
“No one but Harry knows the true identity of Kristin Cavanaugh. And now you. I hope you’ll keep it to yourself. Maybe when I’m dead it’ll come out. And that’s fine. I won’t need to deal with the glares and whispers from women who obviously see me in a different light. But creating Kristin Cavanaugh saved me.”
“Why are you telling me this?” I asked.
“Because I think you are where I was. And because I think you have an idea of what you’d like to do but you’re afraid to tell Jeremy. Am I right?”
I nodded. “I’d like to open a tea room. I’ve been meeting with a mentor from the Small Business Administration. I wanted to figure everything out before I talked to Jeremy about it.”
“I think it’s a wonderful idea,” Diana said. “And Harry and I would love to be investors, when you get to that point.”
“You’d do that?”
“I learned a long time ago to follow my heart and if this is where your heart is leading, follow it. But don’t shut Jeremy out. You might just find he’s a better partner than you had imagined.”
I was stunned by what Diana had told me, and after they left I couldn’t stop thinking about her being Kristin Cavanaugh. I have read all of her books and, l
et’s just say, they include a lot of X-rated parts. She’s right. Her friends would definitely gossip if they knew she was Kristin.
Maybe Diana was right. Maybe my tea room could happen. And maybe Jeremy won’t think it’s such a stupid idea.
Chapter 18
Jeremy
When I got home, Tess had everything packed and ready to go. “Guess this is what you call an intervention.”
Tess smiled. “Yeah, guess so. Look, Jeremy, I just want to get one thing straight before we leave. There is no other man. The man you saw me with is Richard Manning.”
“Why does that name sound so familiar?”
“He owns the minor league baseball team and a string of successful restaurants and bars in the area.”
“What the hell were you doing with him?”
“I tried to tell you but you took off.”
“Do you blame me?”
I shrugged. “I guess not. But you didn’t see what you thought you saw. He’s been helping me with a business venture.”
“God damn, Tess. You’re thinking about starting a business and everyone else knows about it except me?”
“It’s not like that. Only Richard. And Sue. I told her last night. That’s it. No one else. I didn’t want to tell you until I had it all figured out. Then I wanted to present my plan to you.”
I sighed. “Did you ever stop to think I might want to be a part of it?”
“But you would be a part of it.”
“That’s not what I mean and you know it. Whatever happened to us planning things together, to us figuring out life together?”
“We figured out going to Disney World together.”
“Not exactly, Tess. You figured it out and ran it by me when you were done making all of the arrangements. I might have planned it a little differently.”
“Then why didn’t you say something?” Tess asked.
“Because it was too late. You already had everything booked. But you know what, if you had asked me I would have suggested we go to Universal Studios for three nights and drive to Disney World on the fourth day and then stay there for a week.”
“That would have been a great idea.”
“See, that’s what I mean. When we don’t talk, when you keep everything to yourself, you shut me out. And the more you shut me out, the lonelier I become. I miss you, Tess. I really do. But I can’t go on like this.”
***
Tess
As we drove down the highway, I couldn’t believe the words coming out of Jeremy’s mouth. I didn’t think he cared about planning Disney World. I assumed he was happy not to have to worry about it. But listening to his suggestion of going to Universal Studios and everything we could have done there made me realize I made assumptions I shouldn’t have.
“But I didn’t tell you about my idea because I knew you didn’t want me to go back to work. So I thought if I had it all figured out and laid it all out for you it would show you I had done my homework and was taking it seriously.”
“I’m not going to lie,” Jeremy said. “I wasn’t happy about you wanting to work outside the home. I do like you being at home. But I’ve come to understand you need more. I had accepted that. But my God, I had no idea you were thinking this big. Owning a tea room isn’t quite the same as working part time teaching cycling class.”
“I still plan to teach cycling, but I want something more. And Richard was helping me figure things out.”
“Yes. And I would have liked to have helped you, too. That doesn’t mean Richard shouldn’t be involved. I’m grateful he’s your mentor. But we could have evaluated various businesses together and, with Richard’s help, made a decision—together.”
I crossed my arms. “But it wasn’t like I was going to go ahead and do this without telling you about it, without your approval. I need your help financially.”
“Fuck, Tess. I want to mean more to you than just money. Sometimes I feel like the only thing I’m good for is bringing home a paycheck.”
“That’s not fair,” I said.
“It might not be fair, but that’s how I feel. Right or wrong, it’s how I feel.”
I sat back in my seat and stared out the window. Jeremy had surprised me. I had no idea he felt all these things. And I was beginning to realize just how disconnected we were. Maybe Diana was right. Jeremy might be a better partner than I could ever imagine.
***
Jeremy
Tess and I checked our bags at curbside and headed for gate C1. The traffic wasn’t too bad and we had about an hour before take-off. We stopped at a bookstore on the way and I picked up a newspaper and Tess picked up a book.
“Find what you want?” I asked.
Tess nodded. “It’s the latest book from Kristin Cavanaugh.”
“Who’s she?”
“Some romance author.”
We paid for our stuff and went to find the gate. It wasn’t too crowded, which was nice.
“Do you know anything about the place Jen booked?” I asked.
“It’s an older inn. Completely renovated, though. Sounds gorgeous. She said she booked a parlor suite and it has Victorian antiques, lace curtains and hardwood floors. She said the gardens are incredible.”
“I wonder how close it is to Mallory Square?”
“A lot closer than the hotel we stayed in during our honeymoon. This inn is only a few blocks from the square. On our honeymoon, we stayed near Southernmost Point.”
A memory popped up and it made me smile. “I wonder if the dollar we wrote on and taped above the bar is still there at Captain Tony’s?”
Tess smiled. “What about my underwear?”
I laughed. “I’d forgotten that you took off your underwear and pinned them to the rafter.”
We laughed. I couldn’t remember the last time we laughed. Maybe this is what we needed after all, to go away and be the couple we were before we had kids and responsibilities had become our new best friends.
***
Tess
I can still remember taking off my underwear. I was drunk and a guy sitting at the bar bet me and another girl we wouldn’t do it. That’s all it took for me to whip off those babies and tack them up there. Back then, there wasn’t much to my underwear. It was mostly a string. But the whole bar exploded in laughter and clapped and the guy gave me a twenty. Of course, that was gone almost immediately.
I would never do something like that today. And that’s a story I’ll never tell my kids. Well, maybe when I’m old and wrinkled and they have to change my underwear, then I’ll tell them. Come to think of it, there’s a lot I won’t be telling the kids. Makes me wonder if there are things about my parents that would surprise me. I never really thought about it much, but knowing Jeremy’s mom is the romance author Kristin Cavanaugh, I’m sure there’s a lot I don’t know.
They called for us to board and, lucky us, we were one of the first on. I gave Jeremy the window seat. The plane wasn’t very big. Key West has a small airport and the runway is short, so big planes can’t land there, but it was a straight flight, which beat having to change planes in Miami.
I pulled out my new book from my carry-on and watched as the passengers loaded. There was a seat next to me on the aisle and I had my fingers crossed no one would sit there. I wasn’t sure how full the flight was. If the seat remained vacant, I’d move over to give Jeremy and me more room.
Just when I thought things were looking pretty good the seat might stay open, an overweight man who smelled like a mixture of garlic and pine needles sat next to me. I scrunched over as close to Jeremy as I could. It was going to be a long flight.
The man, who obviously had too much to drink, fumbled with his seat belt. He finally managed to buckle it and sat back in his seat and closed his eyes.
I started to read my book, but I didn’t get very far. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to pick a book my mother-in-law had secretly written. The first sex scene I came to made me feel uneasy. Just thinking about Diana writing it scored ten
on the yuck factor.
Jeremy had dozed off reading the newspaper, so I decided to get some shut eye, too. We would be there in an hour.
Chapter 19
Jeremy
It was late when we got into Key West, so Tess and I grabbed a cab to our inn. We were both exhausted and fell into bed. We decided we’d talk in the morning.
I woke up earlier than Tess and went to the grocery store, which was only two blocks away on Eaton Street. The front desk clerk suggested we check out the bakery across the street from the store. “Best pastries on the island,” she said.
Since our suite contained a full kitchen, I figured I’d get some bottled water, milk and cereal. And I’d stop at the bakery for a pastry for Tess.
Just being in Key West made me feel more relaxed. My neck and shoulder muscles didn’t feel so tight and they had been killing me for weeks. Walking down the tree-lined sidewalk, past picket fences and eyebrow houses with intricate gingerbread made me smile.
I remember on our honeymoon, Tess fell in love with the eyebrow houses. She thought extending the roof down over the second floor windows was genius for helping to keep the inside cool. In fact, we spent one afternoon riding around the island trying to find as many eyebrow houses as we could.
Tess also loved gingerbread and Key West is home to some of the most beautiful millwork in the world—everything from orchid cornices to palm trees, parrots and even violins encircling the wide porches. Because the gingerbread on homes often reflected the inhabitants’ occupations, Tess liked guessing what they did.
I remember Tess telling me that her grandmother lived in a Victorian house with lace-like gingerbread. After her grandmother died, the house was sold and the new owners, wanting the wooden house to be maintenance free, removed all of the gingerbread and covered the house in vinyl siding. When Tess saw what they had done, she was so disappointed. “They had turned an extraordinary house into an ordinary house,” she said. “All that beauty, everything that made it unique is gone. Now, it’s just like every other house. Nothing special.”
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