by E. L. Todd
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Also by E. L. Todd
Afterword
About the Author
325 First Fights
E. L. Todd
1
Amelia
I just finished loading the dishes in the dishwasher when there was a knock on the door.
I assumed it was Ace. He stopped by whenever he picked up firewood at the store. The thought of him being at the door gave me a jolt of excitement. Anytime I was in the same room with him, I thought about those hot kisses we shared…and where they led to.
I pulled off my rubber gloves then opened the front door. My smile faltered when I saw the man on the other side.
It wasn’t Ace.
It was Evan.
My ex-husband, Evan.
“What are you doing here?” I hadn’t seen him on my doorstep in nearly a year. He never dropped by for a visit. I could barely get him on the phone for a short conversation.
He slid his hands into his pockets and sighed. “I was hoping I could take the girls out for ice cream.”
He wanted to spend time with them?
Did my phone call have an impact on him?
“You do…?” I still hadn’t recovered from what I’d just heard. Joy I hadn’t felt in a long time surged through my body. My daughters always asked for their father, and I was tired of making excuses for him.
“Yeah.” He stood in his slacks and collared shirt, obviously just getting off work for the day. His hair was cut short, and his face was hollower. He’d never been overweight before, but now he looked even leaner, probably from chasing around a woman who was barely an adult.
“Yeah…of course.” I opened the door wider and allowed him inside. “Rose! Lily!”
They came running down the hall. “What, Mom?” Rose asked. She stopped when she saw her father standing in the hallway. “Daddy? Lily, Dad is here!”
“Dad!” Lily ran down the hall and crashed right into his thighs.
Evan chuckled then picked both of them up, holding them in his strong arms. “Hey, princesses.”
I tried not to cry.
“Want to get some ice cream?” Evan asked.
“Yes!” Rose raised both hands in the air. “Rocky road.”
“Vanilla,” Lily said.
Evan carried them to the door. “I’ll have them back in about an hour or so.”
“Sure.” My voice cracked, and I could barely contain my emotion. “Take your time.”
Evan looked at me with a softened expression, showing more compassion than he had in the past year. He never cared about my tears or my depression. He just grabbed his stuff and left without looking back.
Evan finally walked out with the girls and headed down the road into town.
I watched them go from the doorway, tears running freely down my face. All I wanted was for Evan to be the same father that he was before. It took a long time for me to accept that our marriage was over, but I eventually got over it. But I could never accept Evan’s abandonment of my girls.
So, in that moment, I was the happiest woman on the planet.
The house was unnaturally quiet and clean since I was the only one there. I finally got to sit on the couch and read while sipping a glass of wine. The night was setting over the horizon, but I didn’t glance at the clock and wonder when the girls would be home.
I hoped Evan would spend as much time with them as he could.
My phone lit up with a text message from Ace.
Hey. How’s it going?
I noticed he checked on me a lot more often now that Bree had her memory back. Cypress used to be the one checking in with me constantly, but now that he was trying to put his marriage back together, I wasn’t as much of a priority.
I shouldn’t have been a priority to begin with.
Good. You’ll never guess what happened.
Rose finally cleaned up her room.
I laughed because that would never happen. No. Evan stopped by and took the girls out for ice cream.
Ace didn’t say anything back.
I knew that meant he was walking over here. Since we lived two blocks from each other, he preferred to have conversations in person. His knock sounded on the door a few minutes later.
“It’s open.”
He walked in and joined me on the couch, wearing his running shorts and a t-shirt. He obviously had just gone for a hike, even though he didn’t appear to be sweaty. His hair was messed up from the breeze, probably along the beach. “So, he’s with them right now?”
“Yeah. He just showed up on my doorstep and took them out for ice cream.”
Instead of being happy, he slowly nodded and rubbed his chin. “I’m glad he pulled his head out of his ass.”
“I didn’t think my conversation got to him. Didn’t seem like he cared.”
He rubbed his hands together and watched them glide past one another as he considered what I said. “Maybe he had a change of heart.”
“He must have. Maybe his girlfriend finally loosened her claws a little.”
He nodded again. “I’m glad to hear that.”
“When they left, I cried for twenty minutes.”
When Ace turned back to me, he wore a soft expression he never showed in front of anyone else. He seemed to drop his machismo when it was just the two of us. Other than being profoundly attracted to one another, we were obviously close friends. Bree was my best friend, but something about Ace made me feel a connection I didn’t have with her. “I wish it hadn’t gotten that bad to begin with.”
“I’m just glad things are different now. I hope it becomes a regular thing.”
“I’m sure it’s the beginning of something new,” he whispered. “I’m glad Evan finally had the balls to take care of his responsibilities.”
“Me too.”
He rested his arms on his knees and glanced at my book. “Enjoying some alone time?”
“Yeah. I’m not used to it.” I laughed and set my wineglass down.
He grabbed it and took a drink. “Good stuff.”
“I didn’t know you liked wine.”
“I like anything with alcohol in it.”
Like always, I felt the tension between us. Once the conversation died out, the physical chemistry ignited. I could feel it, and I assumed he must too. Now I couldn’t be alone in a room with him without thinking about those big hands all over my body. I wished he’d spend the evening watching TV with us, and when the kids went to sleep, he would hop into bed with me. I didn’t just want sex, but a relationship that grew out of our loyal friendship.
But that would never happen.
I cleared my throat then grabbed my glass of wine again. “Would you like some?”
“No, I shouldn’t.” He patted his stomach. “No carbs after dinner.”
I’d never been strict with my diet. And of course, I would never have a fit body like his. I had curves and long legs, but I certainly wasn’t in shape. My muscles weren’t toned, but I didn’t have time to work out like everyone else. When Evan had been around, I did. But that was a luxury that disappeared the day we got divorced.
The front door opened, and Evan walked inside with the kids. “We’re back.”
Ace stood up, looking menacing without even trying.
I knew Ace wouldn’t start anything, so I ignored him. “Did you guys have fun?” I walked t
o the entryway and saw the girls had messy hair, telling me they went to the beach after ice cream.
“So much fun!” Rose hugged me then walked down the hallway to the bathroom so she could clean up.
“Yeah!” Lily hugged her father. “Goodnight, Daddy.”
Evan kneeled down and returned the embrace. “Goodnight, princess.” He kissed her forehead before he let her go.
Once Lily was gone, it was just the three of us.
And it was awkward as hell.
Evan eyed Ace before he looked at me, slipping his hands into his pockets.
I wanted to say something to break the ice, but I couldn’t think of anything. I didn’t want Evan to think I was dating Ace, but it really didn’t matter what he thought. It was none of his business.
Ace was the first one to do anything. He stuck out his hand to shake Evan’s. “It’s nice seeing you with the girls.”
My heart melted on the spot, seeing Ace do something compassionate when he felt so much hatred. I knew Ace wanted to murder Evan more than anyone else, but he knew how important it was to me for Evan to be part of the girls’ lives.
Evan eyed his hand before he took it. “Thanks…”
Ace stepped away again, finished with being polite.
“Well, thanks for coming by, Evan.” I walked to the front door and opened it. “You know you’re welcome anytime.”
“Thanks.” He walked with me then turned back to me. He glanced at Ace before he met my eyes again. It seemed like he wanted to say something else, but he wouldn’t say anything in front of company.
Ace stepped away and walked into the living room, understanding this was a private conversation between two parents.
I stepped outside and shut the door behind me. There wasn’t much point in excluding Ace because I was just going to tell him what happened anyway.
Evan brushed the corner of his mouth before he spoke. “I’m sorry I haven’t been around this past year. I just—”
“I don’t care, Evan.” I didn’t care about his excuses. I didn’t want to hear about his life with his new woman.
He stilled at my rebuttal, put off by it.
“I forgive you for everything. It’s in the past, and it doesn’t matter anymore. I just hope that means things are gonna be different. The girls love you, Evan. Just because we aren’t together anymore doesn’t mean we can’t be a family. You’re welcome in this home anytime you want. I mean that.”
His eyes softened again, and he tilted his head toward the floor. “You’re being a lot nicer than I deserve.”
I shrugged. “You’re their father. I want this to work. That’s all that matters.”
He stepped back on the stone step, one foot propped higher than the other. “Are you and Ace a thing now?”
The question caught me off guard. Was our attraction so obvious that even Evan picked up on it? My initial response was to say no, but my stubbornness refused to give him an answer. “I don’t ask about your personal life. You don’t have any business asking about mine.” He cheated on me for months and then told me he was in love with another woman the same day he moved out. I didn’t have to tell him a goddamn thing.
Evan held my gaze without blinking, but he couldn’t hide the hint of disappointment overtaking his features. His eyes fell slightly, and his mouth tensed as he pressed his lips tighter together. If he was jealous, he was a psychopath because he had no right to feel anything of the sort.
“Good night, Evan. Please come by whenever you want. My door is always open.” I turned around and walked back into the house, holding my head high and being the strong woman I’d been born to be. When he left, I didn’t show any weakness. I took the high road, refusing to let him completely destroy me. I would do the same now. I turned around when I didn’t hear him say anything back.
He finally walked down the rest of the steps before he looked back at me. “Good night.”
The second I walked into the office, the gang cornered me.
“Evan came by last night?” Bree asked, hopping out of her chair.
Cypress stiffened, just as interested.
Blade kept his feet on the desk as he spun a pen around his fingers. His eyes remained on me.
Ace sat back in his chair, his massive shoulders looking powerful. He didn’t look at me, his eyes focused out the window.
I assumed Ace told them the news. “Yeah. He took the girls out for ice cream.” I sat at my desk, feeling my heart skip a beat in preparation for the interrogation about to follow. “He was gone for a few hours, and I know they went to the beach. The girls were happy, so that made me really happy.”
Bree had made her new feelings for Evan perfectly clear, and she wasn’t going to change her opinion anytime soon. “Still hate him, but I’m glad he did the right thing. Looks like your words had an impact on him.”
“Apparently…” The conversation had gone so poorly, but I guess he’d spent a lot of time reflecting on our discussion.
“This better not be a drive-by,” Blade said. “Because that would fuck with the girls even more.”
“If that’s the case, my fist will have a little talk with him,” Cypress threatened.
“He’ll stick around,” Ace finally said. “He seemed sincere.”
I knew they would never like Evan again, but they would be reasonable around him since he was still the father of my kids. “Anyway…what’s new with everyone?”
“Just have restaurants to manage,” Blade said. “I’m manning Olives today. Ace needs a break.”
“I’m gonna take care of the café,” Ace said, looking cool as he sat back against his chair.
“I’ll do Amelia’s Place,” Bree said. “I really need to learn the ropes anyway.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Cypress said. “Let’s break.” He walked out first, Blade following behind him. Ace walked out a moment later, his arm brushing against mine as he headed to the door.
I felt the static arc between us.
When the guys were gone, Bree walked up to me. “You okay?”
“I’m fine. I’m happy, actually.”
“Because of Evan?”
“Yeah. I needed my girls to know their father loved them. Our dad has been gone our whole lives, and I don’t think either one of us has ever been whole since, you know?”
“I’ve been fine,” she said. “I have you.”
I smiled. “You’re right. We’ve always had each other.”
“So Ace was there last night, huh?”
My grin widened. “Nothing happened.”
“Why not?”
“We agreed to stay friends. You know that.”
“Why not be fuck buddies?” she asked. “I mean, it works for both of you.”
“I’d set myself up for heartbreak. That’s why.” We’d agreed not to tell anyone about our hookup last week, so I would keep my word.
“I think you could wear him down if you really tried…”
I turned to the door. “Let it go, Bree. It’s never gonna happen.”
“Never say never. Don’t give up.”
“I’m not the kind of woman to chase a guy more than once. I told him how I felt, and he rejected me. Let’s move on.”
She sighed like my response was irritating.
“What?” I asked. “That would just be desperate.”
“In this case, I think it would be fine.”
I turned around and squinted my eyes. “Bree, are you trying to tell me something?”
Her face turned whiter than a ghost. Even her lips lost their pinkness. “No…I guess I’m used to Cypress pursuing me relentlessly. No doesn’t seem to matter to him.”
“But you’re married. Totally different.”
She shrugged then walked out the door, which was unusual for her. She usually had to have the last word in any argument.
2
Blade
“How’s it going with Bree?” I asked as I sat across from Cypress at the table. I had a dark beer sitting in fron
t of me. I needed something strong after the long day I had, but I didn’t want to get into the hard liquor.
“You know how they say marriage takes work?” He brought his glass to his lips and took a long drink, his throat shifting as he took it all down.
“Yeah,” I answered.
“Well, they weren’t fucking kidding.” He set the beer down with a loud clunk. It tapped against the hard wood of the table.
Ace tapped his fingers against the table, his beer bubbling. He wore black jeans and a dark blue shirt, blending in with the dark background of the bar on the north side of Dolores. “That bad, huh?”
“She’s just a stubborn pain in the ass.” He sighed as he leaned back in his chair. “Every time we make progress, she yanks us back by bringing up what I did. It’s like she’s forcing herself to do it too.”
“She probably develops feelings for you but then feels guilty about it,” Ace said. “She forces herself to remember what you did so she doesn’t fall for you again. That’s my best bet.”
“Did Amelia tell you that?” I asked, knowing Ace wasn’t the strong and silent type. Understanding complicated emotions wasn’t his forte as far as I knew. But then again, he spent a lot of time with Amelia, so what did I know?
“No,” Ace answered, looking at Cypress. “But I remember what Bree said to us the first time you got back together. She was still in love with you, but she didn’t want to let those emotions control her decisions. So she kept repeating to herself what you did. She’ll probably do it for a long time.”
“Why can’t she hit her head again and forget that I cheated on her?” Cypress asked. “Totally wipe it from her memory?”
“I’ll smack her upside the head for you,” I said with a chuckle.
Cypress dragged his hands down his face. “She wouldn’t fuck me without a condom, so I got tested the next day. When I showed her the results, she said they were irrelevant because she doesn’t know what I’m up to when we aren’t together.” He threw his arms up in the air. “Come on. Why the hell would I live next door to her if I was chasing tail all the time?”
I shrugged as I drank my beer.
“You know what her response is to that?” Cypress asked as he tilted his head. “That I fucked someone when we were together the first time, so who knows what I’d do.”