by Cindy Pon
A figure emerged from between the trees.
Kai Sen.
Skybright blinked, certain that her mind was playing tricks on her.
But the grin that spread across Kai Sen’s dirt-smudged face was very real. “I’ve found you,” he said, before sweeping her into such a tight hug that her nose was pushed against his chest. Her arms were trapped within the blanket, and she struggled against him, like a fish wrapped in banana leaves. But his arms were too strong, and she finally gave in, leaning against him. The steady thudding of his heart beneath her ear calmed her.
“How did you find me?” she murmured into his tunic.
Kai Sen finally drew back a step so he could see her. “I couldn’t discern your tracks the entire way.”
She tensed, her mind suddenly filled with the awful image of dozens of monks carrying torches, storming through the forest to hunt and kill her.
Kai Sen’s dark eyebrows pulled together, and he squeezed her arms. “No one followed me. I came alone, Skybright. I used my … clairvoyance to find you. Just as I had sensed you that first time, in the forest.”
She shook free and stumbled back from him. “Why are you here? Han’s right. You are mad. Mad to chase me. Mad to talk to me. You shouldn’t be—”
“Don’t.” He lifted a hand to stay her words, but it was the firm tone of his voice that stopped her. “You saw our fight then.”
Skybright pulled the blanket closer, cocooning herself; she missed the feel of his arms around her. “I saw everything. You shouldn’t have risked so much for me, Kai. It isn’t worth it. Don’t you understand who—what—I am?” Her throat tightened, but she pushed on. “You read that book with me. I’m a serpent demon. I kill people. I’m a seductress. A murderer.”
Kai Sen rubbed his palms over his face, and she saw how weary he was. How long had he walked, ran, to find her? When he dropped his arms, there was a slight smile on his lips. “Come here.”
She shook her head.
“As the goddess breathes, you are stubborn, Skybright.” Then he was behind her with both hands on her shoulders, guiding her to her previous shelter. The blanket hindered her movement and she waddled, eliciting a chuckle from him. He helped her ease down against the gnarled trunk before sitting beside her.
“So you’ve started killing people since I last saw you?” he asked in a casual tone.
“No. No!” Without the use of her hands, she slammed her shoulder into him and he grunted in surprise. “It’s not funny, Kai Sen. I don’t even know who I am anymore.” Her voice had become gruff, and she wrenched her body away from him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to anger you. It is a serious thing. But I was serious too. Have you become a murderer?”
“Why would you even believe me if I said no?” she asked.
Kai Sen leaned back against the tree and tilted his face toward her. “I have a knack for gauging people, Sky. I know who you are.”
She flushed, to hear him use her shortened name in such a familiar way. Only Zhen Ni had ever called her Sky.
“You sent those undead away to protect us, didn’t you?” Kai Sen asked.
Skybright nodded.
“How?”
“I ordered them to leave. In my mind. I … I can’t speak in demon form. And I don’t know why they followed me as if I were their leader. I only realized right before I sent them away. I had killed so many of them.” She had thought they were approaching to attack her, when they were drawing near because they believed she commanded them.
“Do you know why?”
She sighed and rested her head against her raised knees, face slanted so she could see Kai Sen. The sun had vanished, and she barely made out his features in the dim light. She was grateful that she was wrapped so tightly in the blanket still, as she wanted more than anything to reach out and touch him. “I have no answers. Other than what … someone told me.”
“Who?” he asked.
Stone. She wouldn’t speak his name aloud. “An acquaintance who said he knew my mother, a serpent demon.” She felt him examining her.
“I see,” Kai Sen finally said, not pushing her to reveal more. “So you did save us. You aren’t what a book tells you. You’re defined by your actions, by the choices you make. And I’ve only ever seen you fight for our side.”
Our side. The human side.
“That won’t stop the other monks from hunting me. From the abbot putting me in a cage if he ever has the opportunity again,” she said and thought she saw Kai Sen flinch, but wasn’t certain in the fading light. “I came across you while searching for my mistress. She was taken by a demon. Have you heard or seen anything at all in the last day? I’m terrified for her.”
“I’ve not seen any girl in these past few days, only hordes of demons and undead. I’m sorry, Skybright.”
Her chin dropped, even as Kai Sen pressed her arm in an attempt to comfort her. She knew it was unlikely he knew anything, but she had hoped …
“Do you carry a lantern in your knapsack?” Kai Sen asked. “May I?”
She nodded and Kai Sen retrieved her small travel lantern, lighting it and setting it beside them. They turned toward each other, she with her knees drawn up and he with his legs crossed in front of him. She was grateful for the soft glow of light, so she could see his face again. Grateful that they could talk like this, if only for a short time, between the chaos and killing that punctuated their lives. They sat there for a long while, silent, studying each other. Kai Sen’s dark brown eyes were liquid in the lantern light, open and guileless. She finally spoke, because she could no longer hold his gaze.
“No matter what you say, there’s no denying what I truly am. Do you really want to be … be friends with something like this?” She shifted, not caring if she would be naked before him, she had become so used to her bare body. Surprisingly, the blanket she clutched around her didn’t disappear as her clothes always did, but her long serpent length snaked from beneath it, glittering red in the faint light. Kai Sen jerked instinctively from her, unable to control his very human reaction. She swept her muscular coil in front of him, draped the tip of her tail over his ankles, before changing back to a girl. “Do you see now?”
“You can control the changing.” His voice sounded hoarse. “You could choose not to be a … serpent demon? You could choose to stay human.”
Skybright stared at the pine-covered floor, where her serpent body had been. Kai Sen was right. She had full control of her shifting now, and could probably suppress the urge to become a serpent demon if she had to. But she remembered the long days when she had remained human; she tried to imagine never slithering along the earth again, feeling so connected with the wild, and the notion frightened her, smothered her. “It’s a part of me, a part of who I am. I can’t deny myself that side. You were right to end things with me.”
“I never ended things between us.” He leaned closer so their legs touched.
Skybright gaped at him, speechless.
“I only wanted for you to stay safe,” Kai Sen said. “Yet everywhere I turned, you seemed to be there, in serpent form, watching over me.”
Skybright hid a small smile. He was right. Like some love-sick maiden from tales of lore, she couldn’t stay away from him. “I’ve always been so practical, with everything. Until I met you.”
He raised a hand and ran his fingertips along her left cheek, tracing the scar he had given her. Her heartbeat stuttered. “Your cut healed. I’m sorry.”
Freeing one arm from beneath the blanket, she grabbed his wrist and pressed her lips against his palm, rough and calloused from his endless battles. “Stop apologizing.”
Kai Sen made a low noise in his throat and circled his arm around her waist, drew her to him until she was reclining on the soft earth and he was propped above her. He leaned down and she caught the glint of his dark eyes before she felt his lips upon her face, kissing his way from her temple, along her scar, until he reached the side of her mouth. “I
like you, Skybright, exactly the way you are.” He kissed her softly on the lips. “And I promise not to apologize again,” he said with a lopsided grin.
Her mind constricted, oblivious to all else except for his mouth marking a slow path across her skin. She had objections. There were things she needed to say. Instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck, tugging him closer for another kiss. Kai Sen slipped his hand underneath the blanket as he kissed her, and paused when he felt her bare skin, his palm cupping the curve of her waist, gliding across her ribs. Her entire body flushed, thrilled from his touch. He drew back and she lifted her head, trying to capture his mouth again.
“Have you seduced anyone then?” he asked in a rough voice. “Some hapless man traveling on a deserted road?”
“Only you,” she replied.
He laughed, and she could feel the rumble of it in his chest, before he leaned in to kiss her neck. “Are you sure this is what you want?” he asked. His hand had slid to rest above her heart, and it beat so wildly that for a moment, she felt faint.
“Yes. But is it what you want? You’re forsaking everything—”
Kai Sen gently pushed the blanket aside so she lay exposed, naked beneath him. But his eyes never left hers. “I’ve made no vows, Sky. And even if I had, I would break them for you.”
She untied his sash and he shrugged off his tunic, taking in the sight of her now, his gaze causing her whole being to shiver.
“You’re cold?” he whispered, lowering himself and covering her body with his own. His skin felt hot, warmer than the summer night.
She smiled. “Far from it.” Skybright pressed a hand to his birthmark, a deep purple in the dim light, then ran her fingers along his collarbones, before skimming down his torso, stopping at the bandage that wrapped around his waist. “Your injury … ”
“I’m fine,” he said, and she felt his muscles bunch as he leaned in to bite her shoulder, taste the hollow of her throat. “More than fine.”
They took their time exploring each other in a wordless dance that alternated between unhurried and frenzied, until her senses were filled with the salt of his skin, the pressure of his mouth and his hands. She twined her fingers in his hair, her palm cupping his nape, and she felt him smile against her neck before he grazed her collarbone with his lips. Finally, when their bodies joined, she felt as if her soul would overflow with the feeling of him, and tears slid down her cheeks. She glimpsed the moon above, splintered between thick branches, before Kai Sen dipped his head to kiss her deeply. “Skybright,” he murmured against her ear, as if her name were a secret or a revelation. Then he pulled back, suddenly tense. “You’re crying. I’ve hurt you.”
He had tasted her tears.
“No.” She grasped his shoulders with both hands and pushed, until he rolled onto his back and she was above him, her loose hair draped across his chest. He let out a surprised laugh, his eyes filled with her, dark with desire. “Don’t stop, Kai,” she whispered. “Don’t stop.”
Kai Sen had fallen asleep almost immediately after, but not before he had laced his fingers through hers and pulled her hand to rest against his chest, so that she could feel his heartbeat. “I’d give up everything for you,” he had said with a slow smile, his eyes heavy lidded, reminding her of the orange tabby. “Sing for me?” he asked drowsily.
And she did.
She watched him sleep now in the low lantern light, studying the hard lines of his body to her content. Kai Sen’s physique was lean and powerful, yet still elegant. She carefully untangled her fingers from his hand after awhile, and he slept with his fist curled beneath his chin, like a child. Skybright hummed to herself, and gently picked off the pine needles that had stuck in his hair, lips curving as she did so. She didn’t know that she could feel so tender yet fevered for someone at the same time.
There had been no pain when their bodies had come together. Nothing that had been warned of repeatedly in The Book of Making, had been whispered about in hushed tones between Min and Zhen Ni. Only pleasure. It was what her body was made for. There would be no checking for blood stains on the bed sheet the morning after. Even if she had been chaste, she was never meant to play the role of the virgin. The role of the bride. Heart heavy, she slid off the blanket and folded it over to cover Kai Sen. Husband and wife and toddling children with chubby cheeks. Love and family. A simple life. This was something that she and Kai Sen could never share, even if the Yuan family, if Zhen Ni, were willing to relinquish her from service.
She leaned over to peer at her lover. Lover. Kai Sen’s face was completely relaxed, the hint of a smile upon his mouth. He took deep, even breaths as he slept, and Skybright’s fingers drifted over his shoulder, his cheek, but she didn’t touch him. The scent of their love making, their passion for each other, lingered, stirring something deep within her, and she was tempted to wake him so they could do it again. She darted her tongue out to taste the air, and for one brief moment it appeared forked. She jolted back from him in panic, feeling a slow familiar heat threatening to rise, urging her to change. She tamped it down forcefully, and remembered Kai Sen reading to her from that awful book filled with descriptions of monsters and demons: By then the victim is usually sound asleep after an amorous encounter and is brutally murdered, either poisoned by her bite or strangled by her coil. It is unclear why she kills.
What had she done?
What if she had been compelled to shift after their love making, and killed him? Without being able to control herself, because that was what serpent demons did? Her scalp crawled at the thought, and she touched her abdomen, just to be certain it was human flesh and not serpent scales covering her torso. She drew her bare legs to her chest and crushed her arms around her knees, as if this would ensure that she wouldn’t change against her own will. Stone had told her how much her own mother had enjoyed it, seducing men then murdering them. How Opal had killed her victims with such finesse. She had been selfish to risk Kai Sen’s life when she still knew so little of her own true nature.
It should never have happened.
Skybright pulled away, not daring to steal one last kiss, for fear she’d wake him. She quietly gathered her knapsack and Zhen Ni’s, but left the blanket and travel lantern for Kai Sen, as she had her mistress’s to use. Her limbs felt languid, and if she caved to instinct, she’d nestle against Kai to sleep as well. But it wasn’t meant to be.
It had never been meant to be.
She ran noiselessly into the dark forest, shifted when she was far enough and hidden among the trees, ready to shift back if she was suddenly filled with murderous intention. Instead there was nothing but an emptiness in her chest, and the tears that had gathered at the corners of her eyes evaporated as she slithered into the night.
Skybright pushed Zhen Ni’s handkerchief against her nose. The hint of jasmine perfume lingered, and her chest tightened with the faint connection she felt to her mistress. She gripped the handkerchief in one hand as she traveled through the night, determined to save Zhen Ni. Slithering within the forests for two full days, she felt Zhen Ni’s presence grow stronger as she slipped between the majestic pines, the scent reminding her of Kai Sen and their time spent together.
She broke through the forest near dusk on her third day without rest. Her mind buzzed with the taste and sensations of wild creatures that scampered in the forest, of the earth thrumming beneath, too full with life. Exhausted, she turned back into a girl, collapsing to the ground, wrung out from the serpent form that demanded so much of her mind and senses.
The dense trees opened onto a landscape of jagged gray rock. Pointed or domed, they towered at various heights, some so tall she couldn’t see their tops, others just reaching her chin. They clustered around the magnificent mountain ledge, and Skybright walked to the edge, saw how the stones formed their columns down its side, the gray melding into other colors—tans, pinks, and blues—until they met the border of another forest far below.
She found a mound of soft
earth surrounded by domed rocks and slipped through, craving to sleep beneath the open sky. The evening had deepened to a dark indigo, and a sliver moon hung like a thin smile far in the horizon as tiny stars began to shimmer into existence. Skybright devoured a custard bun, licking her fingers after. She had refilled her flask at a creek and now she drank, cool water sliding down her parched throat. Then she gorged on some dried dates. Laying Zhen Ni’s travel blanket on the dirt, she curled up to sleep, naked. The summer night was warm, and she didn’t want to risk losing the last tunic and trousers she still had in case she needed to shift without warning.
Her eyelids grew heavy as she studied the night sky. And when she finally slept, she imagined Kai Sen was beside her, that she was wrapped within his arms, even if she knew it was foolish to wish it.
It was still night when she awoke, groggy. The moon had faded from her vantage point, and instead, Stone filled her vision, sitting poised on one of the rocks, gazing down on her. Resplendent in his gold and silver armor etched with crimson, he appeared exactly the same as always. His black hair was pulled back in a top knot, emphasizing his widow’s peak and the chiseled planes of his face. The immortal’s soft glow illuminated her bare skin, and she sat up, not bothering to cover herself. She felt no shyness as she stood, drawing the blanket around her shoulders. For all she knew, Stone could see through clothing if he willed it.
“How long have you been here?” she asked.
“A while.” He sat with his chin propped in one hand, and the relaxed posture made him seem almost ordinary. “You appear very vulnerable in sleep. Very mortal.”
“As mortal as a half-serpent girl can be?” She wrapped the blanket above her breasts, tucked tight, then began plaiting her hair, binding it against her head. “I sent the undead away the other day. The monks were too outnumbered. And they obeyed me like I commanded them.” Skybright patted her hair while studying the immortal beneath lowered lashes. This was their fourth meeting, and no matter how much she forced her voice even, how casually she spoke, she could never tamp down the awe she felt in his presence. Had to fight the urge to fling herself at his feet.