Thomas is dying of cancer. Before I left Pennsylvania to move here, I spent most of my free time with him. We talked about old times, but then he started forgetting who I was as the dementia was getting worse. I don’t know if I have it in me to go back to say goodbye. I see Reagan’s car in the parking spot next to me. I wish she would let me explain to her about Abby wanting to hire the P.I. and me trying to get her to stop. I slam my hand on the steering wheel out of frustration. Women, they will be the death of me, especially those in my life. Firing up my truck, I pull out to meet Sarah.
I pull into the parking lot of the local diner that Abby and I went to yesterday, find the only spot not taken, and hurry to pull in. I shut off the truck and take a deep breath before facing the firing squad. I grab the pictures and papers from the offices spaces that I want Sarah to look at, and we can decide which one we will sign. I head in to the diner to see Abby is with her. I’m going to avoid talking to her about Books a Latte and R. Kramer if I can. I head over to the table where they’re waiting for me.
“Afternoon, ladies.” I pull out of my chair and sit down. I grab the menu to take a look at what I want, then let the waitress know what I want before she scurries away. I’m not in a good mood, and I’m pretty sure she could tell.
“Are you going to apologize?” Abby speaks up first.
“Nope.”
“I think you should,” Sarah says as she plays with her napkin.
“Listen, I did nothing wrong. Sarah, you could’ve helped me with the bags seeing that my hands were full. Abby, you need to stop trying to find out every detail of my life.” I stop talking as our order is delivered. “I love you both, but if it’s going to be like this, then I’m not going to partner with you, Sarah, and I’m moving back home.” I look at Abby. She’s checking my eyes to see if I’m serious or if she can challenge me.
“Fine. I’m not trying to control you, but if I hear a woman’s voice, I’m going to ask.”
“When I tell you that I’ll call you back, it doesn’t mean you call me a hundred times until I answer to yell at you.” I know life has been changing for all of us, and it scares me, and I’m sure Abby, too. I let out a frustrated sigh. “Okay, let’s move on and look at these places that I want.” We spend the next forty-five minutes talking about the office spaces and making appointments for Sarah to see a couple of them. Abby had to go because she had a doctor’s appointment, so Sarah and I walk around looking at spaces. We sign a lease for an office which I’m happy to see out my window is Books a Latte. It will be a reminder that I need to figure out how to fix things with Jonathan, and especially Reagan.
I don’t know what it is about this woman, but I’ve thrown out my rules. It’s in and out for me, no sleepovers, and especially no kids. Last night, feeling her in my arms … I want more, and I want it with Reagan.
“Ready to go? It’s getting late.” Sarah pops her head into my new office.
“Sure, let’s go. I’ll take you back to your car. Tomorrow night we’re going to Nic’s right?”
“Yes, and I can’t wait. I can’t believe Abby is actually going out. I think she wants her last night out because the baby will be here soon.” Sarah locks up. “Are you okay? You seem really distant today.”
“Thomas isn’t doing well. I’m going to try to sneak up to Pennsylvania next week for a couple of days.”
“I’m sorry. I know what he meant to you.”
“Means. He’ll never die in my mind,” I snap. She keeps her mouth shut and we walk in silence for a few minutes. “Sarah, I didn’t mean to snap.” She nods as she gets into her car.
I walk up the steps to my place and stop in front of Reagan’s place. I hear laughter coming from her place so I decide to go home.
Me: I’ll be coming there on Tuesday.
PandaBear: Good.
Sorting through boxes in an effort to make this apartment livable, I find all my papers from my home office which I need to sort out and find my financials and drawings. As I’m doing that, my phone goes off.
“Hey, Rob.”
“Hey, man. I haven’t talked to you much, but I got a cryptic text from Sarah. Are you okay?” Sarah goes to the one person who can’t keep a secret and knows I’ll spill my guts.
“I’ve got some shit that I’m trying to deal with, and those two are driving me crazy.”
“Abby still pissed that you didn’t move in with her?” I laugh into the phone. “Sarah mentioned something about your neighbor.”
“I was having dinner with her and her nephew. Abby called when she was talking to me and called me almost fifty times. Thomas is in hospice, so I’m coming to town next Tuesday.”
“We’ll do dinner together and you will tell me everything. I gotta go; Aaron is home from the hospital.”
“Later, man.” I chuckle, having a best friend who is gay and with an even more romantic partner makes me laugh because of all the free advice I get from Rob, Aaron, Sarah and Abby. I’m glad that Cash and Shawn are alphas or I would be fucked. I toss my phone onto my bed as I continue to put my shit away. I got all but two boxes done and the papers from my office need my full attention. I start tearing boxes down, sitting them next to the door, when I hear a faint knock on my door. I open my door to see Reagan standing there.
Reagan
After talking to Nicarra about what happened this morning with Max, she told me that I need to explain everything to him. I’ll never forget my conversation with Jonathan after Max left this morning.
He came out of his room about an hour later with eyes blood shot from crying. I was sitting on the couch watching TV trying to figure out how to handle the situation. Jonathan came to sit next to me and put his head on my shoulder as we linked fingers.
“Someone wants to buy the place?” he whispered.
“Apparently, it’s someone that knows Max.”
“Are you going to sell it?”
“I can’t sell it, but I need to figure out what to do. People are constantly calling me about it.” I kissed the top of his head.
“You can’t blame him for not knowing.”
“I know. I know.”
“Do you miss them?” Jonathan started to play with the bottom of his t-shirt.
“I miss them every minute of every day. Why do you ask?”
“You never talk about them. I see their pictures but nothing. It’s like they never existed.” Jonathan cried. “I need to talk about them. I’m forgetting things about them,” he begged me through his tears.
“Jonathan, you can talk about them any time you want.” I grabbed him into a hug. I wasn’t ready, because if I didn’t talk about them, then they would come back, right? I wasn’t ready, because I hadn’t dealt with it. Instead of not talking, I’d alienated the one person who needs to hear stories about them. “What are you forgetting about them? What do you need to talk about?”
“Aunt Reagan, I can’t remember their voices, what Mom sounds like when she laughs. I think I remember that she was always smiling. Dad, was he into sports like me? Did Uncle Cash and him play golf together like we do now? Would they be proud of me?”
“Oh, honey.” I was having a hard time seeing him as tears filled up my eyes. “They would be so proud of you. I know your dad would be quite happy with your hoop skills as he had none whatsoever, and yes, golf was their thing. Your mom would love the fact that you have a love of reading which has been passed down from your great grandparents. Oh, my god, her laugh—” I chuckled remembering how she used to smile all the time “—her laugh was like a hyena. It was loud and everyone would laugh with her.”
“Did they suffer?” I felt like the wind was being knocked out of me because I wasn’t expecting that kind of question.
“I don’t think they did. Are you sure you want to talk about this?” Jonathan nodded, and I had to put on my big girl panties to help him through it—I had put it off long enough. I told him about that day. We cried for a good hour then I showed him some home videos of when Kennedy was preg
nant with him. Jonathan asked to go lie down and nap but turned around when he got to my door.
“Why don’t you reopen the shop? It wasn’t just their dream; it was yours too. It’s a way to remember and honor them.” I was thrown off my axis once again. Could I reopen the shop? Should I reopen it?
“Reagan,” Max says my name with no emotion at all. My shoulders sag in defeat before I even say hi.
“Max, I’m sorry about earlier. I was wondering if you can come over to talk to us.”
“I’m pretty sure that you didn’t want to speak to me again.” I start to turn away to leave because I deserve this treatment.
“Man, just get over here so we can beg for your forgiveness,” Jonathan yells from the couch as he plays Call of Duty with some of his school friends. Then he says into his headset, “No, I’m not talking to you. The new neighbor who is hot for Aunt Reagan. Shut up, that’s my aunt and ewww.” I can’t help but laugh at the exchange.
“Well, since you begged, I’ll come over. Let me grab my phone and keys.” I head back to my apartment to wait for him.
“Are you going to shut that off?” I ask Jonathan as I flop down on the couch next to the laptop and a stack of newspapers that I pulled out from my safe.
“Almost done with the round. Are you going to be okay to do this?” I love his concern for me, but I’m worried about him.
“Are you?” He shrugs. Max is standing in the doorway, and I motion for him to come in. “Can you shut the door please?” Max sits down on the other side of the couch away from me but close to Jonathan.
“I want to say I’m sorry for how I behaved this morning. I didn’t let you explain why you had that paper. I assumed the worst case scenario because Books a Latte is a sensitive subject with us.” I sniffle, trying to keep the emotions in check.
“My sister called you. She wrote that down, and I tore it out of her notebook. I didn’t know it was you because I didn’t hear your voice, but I couldn’t let my sister track down someone who wasn’t willing to sell.”
“Books a Latte was a business that my parents and Aunt Reagan ran together until they were killed in the store.” Jonathan stares at the TV, trying not to cry, but when it comes to that day, Jonathan is that eight-year-old boy again watching his parents being lowered in the grave clinging to me. Max’s jaw drops to the floor and his eyes bug out.
“What?”
“Here is the newspaper articles, and the laptop to look up anything you want. It feels like it happened yesterday, and I don’t want to relive it.” I go outside to pace. I hear Jonathan tell Max that I was in the store room and held Kennedy while she died in my arms.
It must’ve been about twenty minutes before Max comes out to stand next to me. I’m looking over the part of Miami that I live in, watching the cars drive by and sirens fade in the background. I can see Hawthorne Hotel lit up in the distance as guests are coming in or getting ready to head out to party.
“I’m sorry that you had to endure that in the first place and then that crumpled up paper was just reopening things.” Max was sincere.
“I get calls all the time about selling it. Jonathan and I talked about what to do with it. We want to reopen it, but I’m scared to go down there by myself. It’s been awhile since I’ve been inside.”
“I can go with you so you’re not alone.” I look up at him and smile. “What are you doing tomorrow night?”
“I’m going out with some friends. Why?”
“Oh, I’m going out with my sister for her last outing until the baby is born. I was going to invite you.”
“I would love to, maybe next time. I never get a night out with this group of friends because of marriage, babies, and work.” He seems okay with that because he kisses me on my temple and heads to his apartment. “Do you want to stay? It’s been an emotionally draining day, and I liked being in your arms,” I ask him shyly.
“It would be my pleasure.” Max’s lips come crashing down on mine, and I want these lips on me everywhere. We finally pull apart after hearing Jonathan coughing. “I’m going to bed—” he looks between us “—with my headphones on.”
We all go inside, and I lock up for the night. I grab my laptop and tell Max to grab a movie so we can watch together. Max chooses the Harry Potter series.
“There are eight movies, and I’m just going to have to stay over eight nights to watch them all.” Max has this childlike look on his face and a smile that could light up the room.
“Sounds like you choose wisely then, Sir.”
As we watch the movie, our legs are tangled together, my head on his chest and enjoying the movement of his chest rising up and down.
“I’m going to go grab a couple things from my place before we both start to fall asleep,” Max tells me as he gets up from the bed.
Max
I kiss Reagan on the forehead before leaving to my place to get a few things. My phone keeps beeping informing me that I’ve got a voicemail. I grab it while I head into my bedroom to grab clothes for tomorrow. I’m meeting Cash and Shawn for breakfast to discuss some of their friends who are contractors that I could meet and start to make connections for my new business. I listen to the voicemail and its Abby. I smile at first, but the more she talks, the more I want to yell at her. I look to the wall of my bedroom as if I can see into Reagan’s apartment.
“Max, I hired that P.I. that you told me to leave alone and you’ll never believe it. She lives in your building. I’m going to see if I can meet up with her tomorrow. Why aren’t you answering your phone? Call me later, love you.”
I hurry up and dial Abby back.
“Hello?” Abby’s voice is groggy and deep like she just woke up.
“Abs, leave it alone,” I state, firmly letting her know that it’s not up for discussion.
“Leave what alone?” She yawns.
“Reagan Cramer. Don’t bother her. It’s not for sale.”
“How did you know her name? I never told you.”
“She is my next door neighbor. Please, I’m begging you to drop it. Respect me on this, there is more to this than you realize.”
“Fine, I’ll drop it for now, but I’m not going to forget it.” I laugh because I know she’s serious. “This baby won’t get off my bladder. Oh, Amanda called and told me about Thomas. Are you okay?”
“I’m flying next week to spend some time with him and check in on Amanda. I’ll need your help with Sarah and getting the office ready, but we can discuss that later.”
“Sounds good. I love you. I can’t wait to go out with everyone tomorrow night. Oh, Cash is starting to stir so I better go. Sweet Dreams.”
“Sweet dreams, Abs.” We disconnect, and I know that I have to give Reagan the heads up. Once Abby has something in her mind, there’s no stopping her.
I look around my apartment to see if I need anything else. I have clean clothes, and something to sleep in because I’ve never stayed with a woman before so this is all new territory. I lock up my place and head next door. I lightly knock on the door, and it opens up. I hear her on the phone with someone.
“I’m sorry that I wasn’t there today, but Jonathan needed me more. What are you talking about that I’m fired? I never take time off, and I called in sick. I know Jenna being in jail is an inconvenience to us, but sometimes life happens. I’m sorry you feel that way after almost ten years working for you. Good bye. I’ll get my stuff on Monday.” She hangs up the phone.
“Reagan?” I hesitantly speak. I’m not good with emotions, and women crying are definitely not my thing. She wipes her eyes and turns around.
“You heard.” It wasn’t a question. “I’m going to have to figure out what I’m going to do now.”
“I’m sorry.” I open my arms to her and she comes right to me. When I’m with this woman, my world just stops, and I want to protect her from everything bad.
“It’s life. I’m tired, ready for bed?” I notice that she’s wearing these cute ladybug pajama bottoms with a black tank top with
a ladybug on it. She looks adorable.
“Sounds like a plan.” She locks up and starts shutting off the lights. She’s mumbling a checklist of her nightly routine. I bet if I could see her office, there would be lists everywhere. I just stand here taking her in from head to toe. She comes to stand in front of me, and I can’t help but pull her into me. Reagan’s eyes glisten from the tears that she shed earlier. Reagan closes her eyes as she parts her lips slightly waiting for a kiss. Our lips connect, and our tongues wrestle for control. My hands grab her ass and hoist her up. Reagan wraps her legs around me as we kiss all the way to the bedroom. I need her clothes off and now.
I shut the door to Reagan’s bedroom with my foot then slide her down my body. We break apart, panting, trying to figure out what is going to happen. Reagan starts walking backward to the bed as she tosses her tank top toward her closet. She slowly puts her fingers into the waistband of the pajamas as she moves her hips from side to side like a Hawaiian dancer to remove her bottoms. I’m watching this woman get undress, and her sexiness is mind-blowing.
Reagan stands there completely naked, playing with herself. Her eyes flutter close, her lips moving as she whispers to herself how good the touch makes her feel as she moans softly. As Reagan’s fingers start to move faster over her clit, I stalk over to her. I drop to my knees and rub my hands up and down her legs. Reagan stops playing with herself but keeps her eyes shut. I take her wrist to slide her delicate fingers into my mouth to taste her on me.
“Oh, God,” she whispers. I kiss her inner thighs, licking my way to her wet pussy.
“Go sit on the bed, get on your hands and knees.” My voice is harsh but strict. Reagan follows my orders as I get naked. My cock is hard as I roll a condom on. I look toward the bed to see Reagan on all fours, and my breath hitches. The view seeing her ass in the air while she rests her body on her arms is pure heaven. “Fuck me,” I whisper to myself.
As I’m behind her, my fingers trace her spine from neck to tailbone—she shivers. I slam into her without warning. She screams out, more in surprise than pain. I raise my hand and connect with her ass. Reagan hisses when I rub my hand print. I repeat the action on the other ass cheek. Reagan’s enjoying it. With each smack, her pussy tightens around my cock. I almost come by the fifth smack. Reagan’s ass is nice and pink; I love seeing my handprints on her as I pound into her.
Love Me Like You Mean It Page 6