“Maybe I should just bring you in the…” The voices were gone once the balcony door closed.
It took Giovanni and me a few hours to find my things. They were scattered all over the place. I had not realized how much there was. Dominic had brought me several more bags my second week there.
When it seemed like we were done, I still couldn’t find my sleeping pills. Tommy had started helping us after his chick of the day left and was looking with us.
“Where do you usually keep them?” Giovanni asked as we searched the living room.
I shrugged. “They kinda move from room to room, depending on where I…” I quickly shut my mouth. Neither Tommy nor I wanted him to know we slept in the same bed a lot.
“Where you what?” He looked puzzled. “Don’t you take them when you go to bed?”
Then we heard, “Babe, don’t you need these?” He came in the room holding a pill bottle.
“Where’d you find them?” Giovanni innocently asked.
Tommy looked at me. I knew exactly where they were from his expression, on his nightstand. I had forgotten where I slept the night before Giovanni came over.
“Uh… bathroom.” He handed them to me and left the room.
Giovanni watched him for a few seconds. “I swear I looked there twice.” Then his face fell. “He didn’t mean the hallway one. Did he?”
“Can we just start over from last night? Please?”
He came to me and hugged me. “Yeah, nothing else matters anymore. I got you back, and I’m never gonna let you go again.”
We soon jammed everything into Tommy’s X5 and were on the road. Giovanni fell asleep almost right away. I was alone in the back seat with a suitcase of clothes next to me, just thinking.
When I called Chad to tell him we got back together, he held back his emotions and said he was happy for me, but I knew he was in pain. How am I gonna handle seeing the heartbreak in his eyes?
“Babe, you asleep?” Tommy asked from the front.
I sighed. “No, just hoping things stay stable.”
“Don’t fuck Chad again, and everything’ll be OK. Well at least for you two. Chad’s gonna miss your pussy. Hell, I miss your pussy already. You think he’ll let me do you at least once?”
I looked at the passing scenery. “I don’t know.” I leaned on the window and closed my eyes.
Tommy helped us unload the car, and then unpack my things. He didn’t seem to want to let go, or he was hoping for one last lay. He finally went home when I started yawning.
“How does it feel to be home?” Giovanni asked me when we got in bed. He sounded exhausted as well.
I turned to him. “It feels right. I missed you.”
“I missed you, too.” He kissed me, and then held me close. “I think I missed you too much. I’m all outta cum.” He softly laughed as he stroked my hair. “Finally, I can sleep… all… night.” His voice was fading already.
I looked up. His eyes closed and his body was relaxing. I caressed his cheek and smiled. “I love you more than I knew I did.”
Chapter 23
Giovanni parked the Harley next to what had to be Dominic’s metallic gray Jaguar XKR-S. I already knew what type of cars Jon, Tommy and Dean had. After putting his helmet on his seat, Giovanni took my hand, and we both checked out the car.
When we had circled it, he looked at me. “Do you know you gotta custom-order these? I want one, but in black.”
“Of course.” I laughed and looked him over in his completely black outfit.
He kissed my hand. “Hey, black goes with everything.” Then we walked inside smiling. Dominic and Jon were coming into the hallway. “Hey, Dom, love your car.”
“Wanna check it out?” Dominic asked him. “I’ll put the top down.”
Giovanni pulled me into his arms. “Do you mind?”
“It’s fine.” I smiled at him.
Dom put a hand on his shoulder. “Come on. I’ll let you drive.”
“Sweet!” Giovanni shouted just after letting me go.
Chris came into the hallway talking on the phone. “Hey, I’ll be right back.”
I looked up at Jon, who seemed happy. “It’s nice to see you both smiling again. He has no clue, right?”
“Well…” I took a deep breath. “I kinda told him who I slept with while we were fighting the other day.”
“And he’s not pissed off?”
“We talked about it last night. He wants to just forget it and move on. I didn’t give him details, just names. If he was mad about it, half of you would’ve gotten punched.”
Jon’s mouth dropped. “How many of us did you fuck?”
The sound of an acoustic guitar distracted us. I followed the sound and found Chad alone, sitting on a chair and playing an incredible piece. I stopped far enough away that he wouldn’t notice me. Jon stood behind me as we listened.
Chad’s hair was up, his head down and his eyes closed. The song was a ballad, but not one I had heard before. He was singing so softly I could barely hear him, but the words were full of pain.
“I'm nothing without you. I'm empty inside. I don't know what to do. My love hasn't died. My body is aching. I'm falling apart. Please, someone help me… fix my broken heart…”
“Dude, did you write that?” Jon went over to him while he played it a second time.
Chad looked up. “It’s nothing.” Then he set his guitar on the floor. “Forget about it.”
“No, man.” Jon put a hand on his shoulder. “It was incredible. We should put that on the CD.”
“Giovanni’d be so pissed. We can’t.”
I sat down, feeling guilty, knowing the song was about him losing me again.
Jon frowned. “Why?”
“It’s about Crystal.”
“So, why would he be mad?”
“It’s called, ‘I’m Nothing Without You.’ ” Chad looked at me.
“Oh… But you guys need a good ballad on the album.”
“It’s too personal. I don’t want them all knowing how I feel.”
“Too late. All the shit that went down brought it out in the open. What’s the difference now?”
“I don’t know.” Chad glanced at me for a few seconds.
“It’s cool if you wanna sing it.”
Chad scowled. “I can’t sing.”
“I just heard you singing.” Jon let out a short laugh, “Sounded good to me.”
“I ain’t doing it.”
Jon sighed. “Fine. Let Chris hear it. He could do wonders with that song.”
“I know, but what if Giovanni gets upset?”
I watched them debate the issue for a while. Chad looked at me with so much pain in his eyes, I wanted to hold him and tell him he would be fine. There was no guarantee of that. I actually had no idea how he was going to deal with losing me again.
“What’re they talking about?” Giovanni asked quietly as he suddenly stood in front of me.
I looked up at him. “A song.” My voice broke while I tried to hold back tears.
“It’s about you, huh?”
I sighed. “Yeah. Jon wants to record it, but Chad doesn’t wanna hurt your feelings.”
Then Giovanni walked over to Chad. “It’s fine. I’m not gonna get mad. I know you still love her. I know you miss her, and I know it hurts. But maybe getting it out’ll help. And if Jon thinks it’s that good, let’s go for it.”
Chad stared up at him, with tears on his cheeks. “I don’t wanna ruin all the progress we made. You’re like my brother again, and I can’t do this to you.”
“I promise I won’t get upset or jealous over a fucking song. OK? Let me see the lyrics. Please.”
Chad grudgingly handed the sheet over, and then stared at the floor.
“Jon, did you read this?” Giovanni sounded excited. “It’s amazing.” He handed it to Jon.
Chad looked up. “You like it, really?”
“If you had to sing it, maybe not,” Giovanni admitted. “But Chris’ll make it his
, and you know it. No one’ll ever know who it’s about. Chad, it’s too good to just put away and forget about.”
Jon smiled widely. “You should hear it. It’s incredible. Chad, we’re doing this.”
“Doing what?” Chris asked as he walked in. “What’d I miss? I was only gone for like 15 minutes.” He sat down next to Chad.
Jon touched Chad’s shoulder again. “Play it for him.” Then he handed the lyric sheet to Chris. “See what you can do with this.”
Chad played the entire song again. He didn’t sing it, though. Chris was reading as he nodded his head slightly. I loved it even more. It was obviously right from his heart.
“Nice,” Chris remarked. “But how do you want the vocals to sound?”
Jon crossed his arms over his chest. “Chad, sing it for him. I don’t care what you think you sound like. You have a great voice.”
“Fine.” Chad scowled, and then sang it.
“Play it again, and I’ll sing it,” Chris insisted with a huge smile on his face. “It’s really good, Chad.”
Chad looked up at him. “Thanks. Start after the fourth C, OK?”
“Sure.” Chris watched Chad’s hands and waited. Then: “I’m alone in this world, since I lost you for good. I miss you so bad, and I'm so misunderstood. All I can see is… him holding you tight. I wish I was him. Can't you make this right?”
I closed my eyes and tried to feel a bassline, but the words got to me. Tears slowly rolled down my cheeks. I hurt him more than I ever thought was possible. When I felt an arm around my shoulders, I jumped.
“You hate that you broke his heart. Don’t you?” Giovanni whispered.
I leaned on him. “I never meant for it to happen.”
“I kinda get how he feels. It was hard just being friends with you,” he softly explained, and then held me close. “The first time we had sex, I was scared I’d let it slip that I loved you. I was trying so hard not to, I didn’t think I’d cum.” He kissed me. “I finally let it slip as a whisper when I came.”
“I didn’t hear you.”
“I said it at my brother’s party, too.”
“So did I,” I admitted. “And the next morning, too.”
Giovanni hugged me. “Now I can say it whenever I want. I love you. I love you. I love you.” He softly laughed as he squeezed me tight.
“I love you, too.” Then I realized Chris was still singing and leaned on Giovanni a bit more as I listened.
When Chris and Chad were both silent, Jon smiled wider than ever. “Hey Dom, can you come up with a piano piece for this?”
“Sure.” Dominic walked to the back of the studio.
Jon shouted, “Vince, come down here.” When he did, Jon added, “He used to play violin with the symphony until Sam convinced him this paid better. I need you to do your thing for this song. It’s gonna be a fucking hit!”
Chapter 24
I awoke without having one nightmare. My therapist’s plan to take me off sleeping pills worked. I lifted my head to find Giovanni watching me. No surprise there. We had been together again for about two weeks, and it was incredible.
I smiled. “Did I wake you up at all?”
“You cried in your sleep a few times, but you didn’t wake up. I just put my fingers through your hair, and you stopped.”
“Maybe I should take the pills, then.”
“It’s OK. I don’t mind soothing you.”
I put my head back down and hugged him. “What would I ever do without you?” Then I looked at his chest and traced the cross, tattooed over his heart. “Who’s this for?” I had not asked him in a long while.
“Someone who died,” was his quiet response.
I sighed, wanting details. “I figured that out. Who, though?”
Suddenly, the bedroom door burst open and hit the wall. “I’m home!”
I screamed, terrified.
“I didn’t mean to scare you, Crystal.” Rosario came closer to the bed. “I got leave and wanted to surprise my brother.”
I clung to Giovanni tightly, shaking and crying. “I can feel him again. Please, Giovanni, make it stop. Pleeease!”
Giovanni held me close to him and rubbed my bare back. “It’s OK. He’s not coming back, I promise.”
“Why’s she so scared?” Rosario sounded worried.
“She was attacked at her place in May,” Giovanni explained. “Some guy followed her home from one of our shows and tried to rape her.”
Rosario sat on the bed near me. “I’m so sorry. No one told me.” He touched my shoulder and I jumped away.
“You can’t touch her when she’s like this. She only lets me and Chad hold her,” Giovanni told him. “She called Chad, and he heard it all. She just kept screaming. He got there just in time. Bro, he tore her clothes off her.”
I started crying harder. “No more, please. I can feel his fingers…” I clutched Giovanni harder.
“Where is he?” Rosario asked angrily. “He’ll wanna die after I’m done with him. Nobody puts their hands on our Crystal.”
“He’s in jail. Relax, man. You’re makin’ it worse,” Giovanni replied. “He’s gonna go away for a long time. She wasn’t the only one.” After I was calmer, he got out of bed while making sure I was covered.
“Dude, you could’ve asked me to get you clothes.” Rosario’s face screwed up. “I have no desire to look at you like that.”
Giovanni laughed as he got clothes from his drawers. “You fucked two girls in the living room, and me being naked bothers you? Anyway, you busted into my room. Good thing we weren’t fucking. That would’ve been a bit awkward.”
“I didn’t know you guys were together,” Rosario admitted. “I thought you’d be alone.”
“Sorry. We’ve been so busy,” Giovanni responded, as he got dressed. “She moved in the day after… after it happened. I told her how I felt, and we were together by the end of the night. Did you know she was in love with me, too?”
I had sat up by then, the sheet over my chest. The fear was gone, but I didn’t know what to say.
“Yeah, I knew.” Rosario smiled. “It was so obvious. The last time I was here, you and Chad kept touching her. It was hysterical. She looked so torn between you two. I always thought she liked Chad too, though. Guess not.”
Giovanni let a look of anger cross his face. “We gotta get dressed.”
When we were ready, Rosario came with us to the recording studio.
Jon walked right to him. “You gotta be Rosario. You guys look so much alike. Wow, nice to finally meet you.” Jon put his hand out.
“You, too.” Rosario was stunned as he shook Jon’s hand. “I can’t believe they know you. I been buying your CDs for years.”
Dominic stood next to him and offered his hand. “Your brother can really wail, you know. He’s almost as good as Jon here.”
Jon smiled. “You got a talented bunch of friends you. Hey, ‘Leatherneck’ would sound awesome with you and Chris both on vocals. What d’ you say?” It was close to thrash metal, so that sounded perfect.
“The song Giovanni wrote? Hell, yeah! He sent me a demo of it. I loved it.”
Tommy came to me and kissed my cheek. “That solo you wrote would sound great as an intro for it.”
“Yeah, that’s a great idea,” Jon agreed.
Tommy winked at me, which made me smile. “I’ll be back in a few.” Then he walked away.
Giovanni was already at the drum set, adjusting cymbals. Most everyone else was getting ready also.
Suddenly, hands were on my shoulders. I exhaled loudly, hoping Rosario didn’t notice. “Tommy, stop.”
“He does like you. I thought so,” Rosario quietly commented, surprising me. “You obviously like him, too. You’re not gonna cheat on my brother…” He squeezed my shoulders harder. “Right?”
I closed my eyes. “It’s not like that.”
“Then what is it?” he whispered in my ear. “He’s a famous rock star. Is that it?”
“Kinda… well�
� it’s hard to explain.”
“You fucked him, right?”
He and Chad were the only people I knew that could do something like that. Rosario was the most perceptive person I ever met.
“Crystal, I’m right, ain’t I?” He kissed my cheek. “It’s OK. Your secret’s safe with me. But please, tell me you didn’t cheat on my brother with him.”
I sighed. “I didn’t.”
“Hey, babe. You ready to uh, play?” Tommy looked at me slyly, sideways, his sexiest look.
I bit my lip and leaned back a bit. “Um, almost.”
“I’ll be waiting.” He had such a sultry voice.
I took a deep breath as I watched him walk with his blue bass to where I normally played. I tried hard to quell my desire, but it was as if he gave off irresistible pheromones.
“Holy crap, that guy is good,” Rosario stated. “He must get so many chicks. I have to say, he is handsome. It’s too bad he’s a friend now. Maybe Giovanni wouldn’t mind you—”
“Mind her what?” Giovanni said as he walked toward us.
Rosario breathed on my neck. “Um, her playing with Tommy. He has his bass here, too.”
“That’s nothing new,” Giovanni informed him. “They got pretty close. It must be a bass player thing.” He winked at me, knowingly.
Rosario let out a short laugh. “Yeah, that must be it.”
“Gotta go.” I kissed Giovanni on the mouth and Rosario on the cheek. Then I went straight to Tommy, with a huge smile.
“Hey, babe,” he greeted me. “I got something special for you today.” He smirked. “Damn, I wish I could—let me stop before I get a hard-on again.”
I looked around as I put my bass on. Everyone was almost done. Strangely, Dominic was putting a guitar over his shoulder. I shifted my guitar and smiled. The new belly tattoo had finally stopped stinging. Only Chad had seen it so far. It wasn’t done healing.
“OK,” Jon suddenly spoke up. “You guys ready?”
Rosario had a piece of paper in his hands, probably the lyrics, and Dominic was adjusting sheets of music on a stand. I looked up at Tommy, who was in position to play, just like me. He winked at me again. Reflexively, I smiled back.
I took a deep breath and started when Jon said to. After a few seconds, Tommy started to play notes that were a little higher, but I blended well with mine. I kept going, and my smile widened.
Rubbed Raw (Triple Threat Book 2) Page 23