“We'll see,” he says as his right hand eases down to my hip, then slips beneath my ass. He jerks my hips up, angles his hips differently, and then buries himself in deeply, his pelvic bone rubbing against my clit at the same time.
I can't hold back my moan as he rubs me just perfectly inside as well. Pleasure shoots through me, and I arch into him, desperately wanting more. Needing more. My nails press into his back, probably making indentations as they flex instinctively when he plunges into me again, this time even harder.
“Yeah, that's the spot,” he murmurs as he begins to drive into me at a steadier pace now.
Shit.
My eyes connect with his as my hips move almost frantically against his. With every thrust, his pelvic bone is still rubbing my clit, and the expression on his face is one of single minded determination as his gaze holds mine.
I feel caught by the intimacy of his stare, and I’m unable to look away. My breath pants across his lips every time he pins me to the mattress as he pumps into me. He's too patient, too watchful, and it makes me self-conscious, because I can tell he's holding himself back. I've done everything in my power to try to control this night, and he's determined to shatter my control. It's in his eyes. In the way he deliberately grinds into me. He's going to watch me explode, and he's going to enjoy every second of it.
I try to control the pleasure that’s building within me. I don't want to give his ego more ammunition than what it needs, but it’s next to impossible to hold back. My body is tightening, and I can feel myself climbing... I’m so close. So incredibly close that I turn my head away, wanting to hide from those prying eyes that look so triumphant. His right hand eases between our bodies, all it takes is one rub against my clit, and my body arches as the tension in it explodes. I release a strangled scream as waves of ecstasy wash over me, and there’s no way to take back that telltale sound that betrays just how well he’s worked me over tonight. He continues to rub my clit, thrusting deep at the same time as I ride out my orgasm. My lower body convulses around him, and I breathe heavily as I come down from the intense orgasm that had just rocked my body. I'm completely limp beneath him when I realize Caleb is no longer holding back now as his hand leaves my clit. His hips slam faster against mine, and slightly harder as he seeks his own pleasure.
My eyes open, and I look up at him, wanting to watch him. Sweat has appeared at his brow, a bit of dark hair falling across his forehead as his hips thrust out of control. His jaw is clenched, and his blue eyes shift to mine as he holds my gaze. They darken, lust and sexual gratification evident in them. I'm surprised he lets me see everything he's feeling. It's an intimate moment that I've never shared with other partners. I can tell that he's close when I see his lips part slightly, eyes glazing over slightly. Those dark eyes never leave mine as he grinds into me hard, a low guttural growl escaping him as he plunges in one last time before going still, his breathing ragged as he tries to catch his breath. “Shit,” he says hoarsely when he collapses on top of me, head dropping to the crook between my neck and shoulder. His chest heaves against mine, and I can feel his erratic heartbeat.
The delicious weight of him has me closing my eyes as I enjoy the feel of him still inside me. My bones feel like liquid, and all the tension from earlier has disappeared. I feel relaxed. Completely sated. I should leave, but I don't want to. Not yet. I'll leave in five minutes.
~*~
I stalk out of the rec room, and I'm proud of myself as I manage not to stumble in my inebriated state. Damn Alex. The crowd in the house is thick, and I squeeze my way through bodies, anxious for some fresh air. The sting in my eyes warn me tears want to form. I fight them back, clenching my jaw as I force my way through another room. Eventually, I come upon the patio doors that lead out onto the deck overlooking the property.
I draw in a deep breath and walk to the railing as I stare out at the vast expanse of lawn before me. It's dark, making it impossible to admire the full beauty of the manicured lawn, but it doesn't matter. I'm not out here for the scenery. I just want to escape Alex and his stupid football friends.
I'm not alone on the patio, so I force the tears away and purse my lips tightly as I try to pull myself together. I'm drunk, and my emotions are all over the place. I find it hard to lock my feelings up in a mental box inside my head until I have some real privacy.
Someone moans in the dark corner of the patio, and my nose wrinkles. Ew. I really don't want to hear them, but I refuse to go back inside where the party is still in full swing. I'd yelled at Alex in front of his friends, and I'm sure gossip is spreading like wild fire.
Footsteps approach me from behind, and my body tenses. Is it Alex? He always comes after me during a fight. He’s not one to walk away from one, and he always tries to work it out rather than ignoring the issue that started the fight in the first place. But embarrass him in front of his teammates...
“I heard about the fight,” Micah says as he settles along the railing beside me.
My shoulders droop, and I glance at him. “He promised me the weekend, but now he's going out to Kevin's family's cabin instead.”
Micah gives my shoulder a brotherly squeeze. “You know he loves you. I see it too, it's in the way he looks at you. I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you.”
“Well, he did,” I say as I cross my arms over my chest. “Ever since he made quarterback for the team, he's always being pulled to one party or another. I miss the times when I was the only thing on his mind.”
“Zoey, everyone changes. We're growing up. You gotta let him find his way, even if it leads in a direction you don't want it to. You put a leash on him, and he'll pull away even more.”
My eyes water, and I angrily wipe at them. Damn it. “Fine. I'll just go back inside and act like I don't care at all that my boyfriend's a total ass,” I say sourly as I turn to walk away.
Micah grabs my arm gently and gets in my face, his expression a mixture of determination and brotherly concern. “Zoey, I'm dropping you off at home.”
“What?”
“You're drunk. If mom and dad weren't out of town, you'd be in a lot of trouble tonight. What happened to pacing yourself?” he asks dryly.
“My asshole boyfriend happened.”
“Right. Let's go,” he says, slipping an arm around my shoulder.
I shrug him off. “I don't want to go.”
He slants me a look. “You really want to go back in and pretend to have a good time while ignoring Alex? It'll just make things worse. Let me take you home, and you and Alex can work it out in the morning. You know he'll be calling as soon as he wakes up.”
Micah's right. I know if I stay, I'll probably cause some sort of drama that will make this fight look like nothing. “Fine,” I say with reluctant resignation. “But what about Ashely? It's her birthday.”
Micah's already leading me down the patio stairs and around the house to the driveway packed with cars. “I'll be gone thirty minutes at most. I already told her I'd take you home and then come back.”
I stumble slightly because the world is a little tipsy—well, I'm the one who's tipsy. Micah steadies me, and we silently make our way down the long driveway until we come to Micah's car. I can't help but wish I was leaving with the one I'd come with—Alex. My brother opens the passenger door for me, and I drop into the seat, sighing loudly.
Micah slides into the driver's seat and slips on his seatbelt before glancing at me. “Seatbelt, Zoey.”
I roll my eyes, which makes the world spin. My head drops back against the headrest as I shut my eyes to try to calm the icky feeling that's building in my gut. I feel Micah lean over me as he slips on my seatbelt and secures it with and audible 'click.' “You barf in my car, and you're the one who has to clean it in the morning,” he warns me lightly.
“I hear you.” It's only fair. Micah's always more than fair with me. Brothers are supposed to be annoying, but I got lucky. As twins, we're closer than the average pair of siblings. We rarely fight, and when we do, we can't g
o longer than a day ignoring the other before one of us caves and takes the first step to reconciliation.
I feel the car moving as we pull out onto the driveway, then we make our way down the winding curves until it meets the road. “I hope Ashley's not mad at me,” I mumble as my eyes flicker open, and I stare moodily out my darkened window. I like Ashely. Micah's been dating her for seven months now, and I can see that she's really good for him. She treats him well.
“Nah, she's too sweet for that.”
A smile breaks across my face, because he's right. They make a cute couple. As we drive through the hills, I straighten up in my seat and start playing with the radio. My mood is so dumpy that I need a good upbeat song to distract me.
Micah groans. “No, leave the radio alone. I don't want to have to listen to your crap for the next ten minutes.”
I look at him and childishly stick my tongue out before saying, “It's not crap. Besides, Ashley listens to the same stuff. Do you tell her she listens to crap?” I ask, already knowing the answer.
“Fine. Whatever,” he grumbles.
Triumph flares in me, and I play with the radio until I come across a song I like. I settle back in my seat, mouth opening to say something but words never leave it. As we speed around a corner, we find a deer standing in the middle of the road—obviously dumbstruck by the bright lights of the car.
Micah curses, jerking the wheel to the left, and I cry out as the car veers too far to the other side of the road. We’re heading straight for a large tree. My eyes widen with horror as things seem to suddenly slow down. I see the large tree looming in front of the car, Micah's side is in the clear, but I’m looking at a direct hit.
I'm going to die.
A strangled sound escapes Micah. He jerks the wheel again, this time to the right, a mere couple seconds before the world explodes with the sounds of crunching metal and exploding glass. Screams pierce the night before everything goes black.
Then I'm awake again, and the air smells metallic while gas fumes burn my nose. I groan and slowly become aware of the pain throbbing in my temple. No, my whole body hurts. Something’s not right. I try to remember where I am, then I remember the party and Micah driving me home.
The deer!
“Micah,” I mumble weakly as I struggle to open my eyes. We'd dodged the deer, but our car had careened towards a tree. “Micah? I don't feel so well,” I say shakily as I pry my eyes open and stare at the twisted metal before me. I'm still sitting in the passenger seat of the car, but the metal is bunched up around me, and the airbag is deflated. It had likely saved my life before it had deflated after impact. I take a mental evaluation of myself and find that I seem to be in one piece. Moonlight shines through the shattered window beside me, and I can see that one of my legs is pinned by a piece of metal. I wiggle my toes, and I'm relieved my leg isn't broken. It hurts, and I can see a hint of red blood. I hope it's just a flesh wound and not something serious.
After a moment of staring at my predicament, I manage to turn my head to the left to look at Micah. Horror sweeps over me as I see the metal sticking out of the left side of my brother's head. Blood has covered his face and has splattered all over the twisted interior of the car. No, no, no, no, no... His eyes are closed, his body pinned to the seat from large pieces of metal. The front left side of the car had been crushed inward, brutally trapping my brother when we’d hit the large, unforgiving tree that still stands before the wreckage.
It should have been my side crushed in, not his.
My constricting lungs make it hard to breathe as I realize with anguish that Micah's dead. There's no way for him to survive the damage to his head. My screams echo throughout the night...
My chest aches so much that at first I believe I am back in the car, trapped with Micah's lifeless body among the crushed and twisted remains of the crash. But then the voice slowly draws me back to reality. The soft, accented voice brings me a hint of comfort, and as the coldness seeps into everything that I am, stealing my breath and stealing my soul, I feel something warm tighten around my tense body. Words are murmured lowly in my ear, and I struggle to breathe again, only to realize that I'm sobbing.
I survived.
I'm here and Micah's gone.
It's not fair. Death had sadistically torn him from my life, and I'm left floundering around in an empty world that holds no appeal to me anymore. I hate my life. I hate the apartment that was supposed to be both mine and Micah’s. I hate myself for being the reason that he died.
That beautiful voice continues to console me, to rock me, to rub my back. I want to yell at it and tell it that I don't deserve its comfort. But the warmth and the hypnotic sound of it lures me back to sleep, all the while protecting me from further nightmares.
Chapter Five
The first thing I become aware of is the naked male body pressed against my back, while an arm curves over my waist, its hand resting near my right breast. The feel of an erection pressing against the back of my thigh has me tensing. The night before comes crashing back to me like a wave breaking across sand.
Damn it all to hell.
I'd slept with Caleb. I fight the beginnings of desire as I remember the feel of him inside me. My body burns with the memory of the way he'd watched me. The way he’d been determined to bring my body to an explosive orgasm that I hadn't experienced in a long time. He'd been a taunting piece of shit, but once we'd really gotten going... My body tingles, causing me to stiffen up further. So he's a good lay. Big deal. Time to move on. But then something else begins to unfold in my mind, and my stomach churns. I'd dreamed of Micah last night. I remember Caleb's voice bringing me solace. Caleb of all people. Resentment floods me as my heart speeds up with the realization that the one person that I would never want to see me vulnerable, had.
I need to leave.
My eyes pop open, and my heart stutters at the sight of the sun peeking in through the crack of the curtains. I'd spent the entire night in his bed. Could this situation get any worse?
“You're thinking awfully hard. Have you decided whether it's a fist in the face or the possibility of round two that's going to greet me this morning?” Caleb asks lightly from behind me.
The sound of his voice has me tensing further, if that's even possible. Escape is the only thing on my mind, so I shove his arm off and quickly scramble out of bed. I stand there, naked, scanning the floor of his room for my clothes without sparing him a glance. I spy the red dress crumpled on the floor, and I scowl at it accusingly as I grab it and yank it on. Stupid dress. I’m aware that I hadn't ended up in bed with Caleb because of something as ridiculous as the dress I had worn, but it's the fact that it's the reminder of what I'd originally been after last night. And yet I'd still ended up having a one-night-stand after I'd made up my mind not to. I yank the hem down my thighs and look around for my bra with my cash, ID, and key. I'll carry the bra in my fist on the way back down to the second floor, because I'm not taking time out to put the damn thing on. Now I just need my shoes.
“Are you even going to say anything to me?”
His voice has my shoulders stiffening, and I ignore him as I spy the shoes. Fuck the shoes. I'll put them on in the elevator. I bend down and grab them quickly before stalking out of his room as fast as my bare feet will carry me.
“That's it, Sparky?” Caleb yells from his bedroom. “Not even a thanks for the scream worthy, amazingly orgasmic sex?”
The slamming of his apartment door is the only answer I'm willing to give him. I quickly drop down and slip on my wedges before I run a hand over the dress, straighten my tousled hair, and then I walk calmly to the elevator. When the doors part and I step inside, I slam my finger into the button for the second floor. I cross my arms over my chest as the elevator doors shut.
When the elevator stops on the third floor, I ignore the two college-aged girls that step in. They eye me for a minute, and they exchange a knowing look. It's pretty obvious I'm doing the morning after 'walk of shame.' I'm not embarras
sed by any means, but I don't like their little smirks. I deliberately straighten my dress strap and give them a sultry smile. “Best sex I ever had.”
Their eyes widen.
At that moment, the elevator opens up on my floor. I give them a deliberate wink before I saunter out and walk down the hall. My key is already in my hand and ready. I reach my apartment door, and a second later I quietly shut it behind me. After reaching down and taking off my wedges, I angrily heave them at the couch where they bounce off harmlessly before thudding softly to the floor.
For a long time I stand there, fists clenched near my hips as I struggle to control my emotions. They are so all over the place right now. Micah's death is right there on the edge of my mind, taunting me. Then to have had to deal with Caleb, the fucking arrogant ass. With my luck, Ace will be on me today about last night, too.
My head drops as I inhale deeply. How could I mess up so badly in one lousy evening? I'd hurt Jeremy, been rude to Ace, and I'd let Caleb seduce me. I need to get away from here for the weekend. Get away before something else happens that I can't take back.
~*~
I park my car in front of the large two-story house and cut the engine. The house towers over my car with its tan and stone siding. Large windows overlook the wide lawn, and I can see the deck peeking out from around the side of the house.
I gaze at the house and feel absolutely nothing. I'd spent half my junior year and my entire senior year living here before I'd left for college. But it holds no appeal to me. The only reason I'm here for the weekend is because I need solitude, and my parents are out of town until next Wednesday. The biggest factor for my trip home to Pasadena is that there is no trace of Micah in the house. He was never meant to be here. I can also hide out, deal with all my shit, and not worry about people prying. I don't have to worry about Ace insisting on seeing me to smooth things over. Because I know he will. I'm surprised he hasn't text messaged me yet. Then there's the fact that I'd had the nightmare in front of Caleb. I'm sure he's bound to bring it up to Ace, and that will trigger Ace's need to watch over me even more than he already does.
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