“Um, okay,” I say as I lead him away from the crowd. I spy a couple leaving a recliner in the corner of the room, and I lead him to it. I gently push him down into it, and he slips his arms around me and tugs me with him. I land on his lap, facing him. Before I can move, he grabs my legs above the knee and settles them on either side of his hips while tugging me closer to him. I find myself straddling him, and I stare at him warily. “This isn't part of the plan, Caleb.”
He gives me a lazy grin. “You're here, you might as well stay a while.”
My eyes search his. “Maybe it's time you go home. I can get you a cab.”
A hungry look flickers over his face. “Come home with me?”
“No.”
“Why?” he asks, his eyes searching mine. “We're good together.”
“Just because it was good, doesn't mean we have to repeat it. I think we either get you a cab, or I should leave,” I say lightly. I can't stay here with him, not like this. Even drunk, he's trying to seduce me.
He frowns at me, then determination flashes in his eyes as he pulls me in for a kiss that I hadn’t been prepared for. I tense up on his lap, clamping my lips shut tightly even as my body begs me to open up and let him kiss me senseless. When he bites my lip hard, my lips part to say “ow,” but his tongue sweeps in. The second his tongue rubs up against mine, I can feel my willpower slipping. I love the way he's kissing me tonight. There's a hint of desperation in it, and I can sense he seems just as lost as I do. As he kisses me, I barely sense his hands sliding down my back and to my butt as he pulls me forward so that I am as close as I can get to him. He's still sporting an erection, and I struggle to find a way to end the kiss, yet it feels so damn good.
I'm so conflicted with trying to figure out what to do that I don't realize what he's up to until his hand is under my skirt, his fingers slipping beneath my panties. One digit glides between my slick folds, and about the time I realize this, his thumb finds my sensitive little nub of tissue. He starts to rub gently in a rhythmic circle.
Oh. My. God. He can't be serious!
I break away from the kiss, my body tensing, but Caleb's lips go to my ear and he murmurs, “Let me make you feel good, Sparky. Just feel,” he says in a seductive voice as his other arm tightens around my back, not allowing me to escape.
“No. Not here!” I hiss desperately as I look around anxiously while battling the pleasure that he's giving me. No one's paying attention to us, but I don't do things like this in public. I never allow a guy to get into my head—let alone my panties—in a room full of people! This is so wrong, but yet it feels so good. I need to push away from him. I could easily break his hold on my back...so why am I not moving?
Caleb's hand leaves my back and slips behind my neck as he holds my gaze. “No one knows what we're doing. Your skirt hides it. Come for me,” he says, his blue eyes penetrating mine. He's got me right where he wants me, and he knows it. I bite back a moan as his thumb quickens. He sees it, and he pulls me in for a heated kiss, his tongue flicking across my own. He kisses me playfully but with a whole hell of a lot of pent up sexual hunger. My breathing quickens, and I want to stop this—no, I don't want to stop. Not yet. It feels really, really good. I press myself into his hand, needing more. I'm so close. Caleb breaks the kiss and then whispers in my ear, “You grind like that again, and people will know I'm getting you off.”
My body stills, and I know he can feel me trembling. His mouth is on mine again, drugging me with the sensuality of it as he kisses me deeply. The pleasure is building, and all I care about is the feel of his thumb pressing intimately against me. He seems to know exactly how to touch me to make me spiral out of control. My orgasm hits me hard. I moan into his mouth, and he swallows it, growling slightly as he acknowledges what he's just given me. I fight not to thrust into his hand, and he keeps moving his thumb, allowing me to ride it out.
Once it fades, I rest limply against his chest as he pulls his lips from mine. He draws me close, his warm hand rubbing my back as his other hand leaves my tender flesh.
That wasn't supposed to happen. I let him... My mind is swirling with confusion, and I can feel my anger growing, but yet...I enjoyed it. Hell, yeah, I enjoyed it! But—I'm so confused. I want to hit him and fuck him at the same time. How is that even possible?
I feel Caleb's lips brush my ear. “Come back home with me, and we'll go finish what we've started. I'll make it good for you, Sparky. You know I will. God, I need to be with you again. You're the best screw I've had in a long time,” he says thickly.
And just like that the world comes crashing down around me. Hard. I'm a screw to him. Just a good screw that he had that he wants again for one more night. The pain that lances my chest startles me and angers me at the same time. How the fuck did I come to care what this man thinks of me? How did I allow this to happen? Suddenly, I hate him. I hate that he'd used my body against me tonight. That I was just a means of pleasure.
I feel used and dirty.
I feel like the slut that everyone assumes me to be. In one lousy evening, Caleb Preston has pushed all my buttons, and I can feel the darkness within me unfurling. I need to get out of here, but first...
I sit back slightly, grabbing Caleb's jaw firmly with my hand so that he has no choice but to look at me. His blue eyes widen at whatever he sees in the depths of my gaze. “Don't ever, ever come near me again. You won't like what happens if you do,” I threaten darkly, then I roughly release his jaw to scramble off his lap. I promptly spin around and flee the room, getting a brief glimpse of Ace's startled face as I brush past him and the group of guys he's with. I feel like the devil is on my heels, and I literally shove people out of my way until I stumble down the stairs of the house. A second later, I'm rushing down the driveway, my pride ripped to bloody shreds. Now that I've escaped, I slow down and try to walk calmly as I reach the end of the drive.
I have no warning whatsoever.
Caleb literally grabs my arm from behind, forcing me around to face him. My reaction is instinctive, I pull back my right fist and slam it into his jaw as hard as I can. Pain spears through my knuckles as it connects with bone. Caleb's head snaps backward briefly before he immediately raises a hand to the side of his jaw. “Holy fuck,” he groans hoarsely, pain lacing his tone.
Have I mentioned that if you get me riled up enough, I have a hard time controlling my temper? I stand before him, seething. “You come near me again, and I'll make sure your dick never sneezes, and you live the rest of your life as a eunuch,” I threaten furiously.
Ace appears out of nowhere, his expression alarmed when he sees Caleb cradling his jaw and cursing profusely, swaying slightly on his feet. “What the hell is going on?” He holds out a hand to steady Caleb.
“Nothing. Go find your next screw, Ace,” I say the word ‘screw’ with drawn out sarcasm before walking away from both of them. Damn fucking men. I just need them all to leave me the hell alone. I'm halfway down the block, striding down the sidewalk as I try to walk off my anger—when Ace catches up to me.
“Zoey, wait. I don't know what's going on, but you can't walk back to the complex by yourself. Let me drive you,” he insists, concern evident in his tone.
The telltale emotion he betrays has me pausing on the sidewalk as an icy coldness beginning to slip through my veins. “Go away, Ace.”
He stands before me, unfazed. “Something big went down, and I'm not going to leave you to wander the streets alone. Talk to me.”
“If I wanted to talk, I'd make real friends,” I retort as I lash out at him, wanting to hurt him like I'm hurting right now.
Ace draws in a sharp breath, and I know my dig hit him right where I meant it to. “Zoey—”
“I don't want you around me. Get a clue, already. None of you matter to me. You never have!” I snap before I turn my back on him and walk away. Why won’t people leave me alone when I want them to? Why do they always have to push? This time he doesn't come after me, and I tell myself that I don't care.
After about a block, I can sense someone following me. Probably Ace. The complex is too far to walk, at least in the dark, so I cave and resign myself to flagging down a cab. The drive home takes only minutes, then I'm taking the elevator up to my apartment. The second I am inside, I grab a water bottle from the refrigerator, strip down in my room, and take a sleeping pill. I just need to shut it all off for a while.
~*~
On Saturday, I take an extra shift at Grendal's. Even though my body is busy, my mind is swirling with thoughts and emotions from the night before. Now that I've had time to think about my actions, I'm realizing that I may have overreacted. I shouldn't have punched Caleb. I do stupid stuff when I'm hurt, and with as drunk as he was, I shouldn't have resorted to violence. So he'd hurt me. Story of my life. I wonder if he even remembers what had gone down or if it's just a blur this morning.
As the day wears on, I expect a text message from Ace, because he never leaves me alone for very long even if we're fighting. But my phone stays silent in my pocket. He doesn't try to contact me, and I don't blame him. He'd only been trying to help, and I'd lashed out at him.
I go to bed that night with my phone on my nightstand where I can reach it. But there's no need. Ace has gone silent on me, and all I can do is pull up my big girl panties and deal. There's always consequences for one's actions, and this is mine. I try to ignore the pang in my chest and tell myself that it's for the best. AJ, Jeremy, and Ace have gotten under my skin, and they were never meant to. They were just supposed to be the fun guys next door that threw good parties.
As for Caleb, I need to forget that one and move on. He's the one that could do the most damage if I allow him to. Even with as close as I am with the guys, I've never let them have control over me. It's as if Caleb knows just what to do or say to get me to do what he wants. It scares the living shit out of me.
~*~
My Sunday is spent doing anything and everything that will keep my mind busy. My phone stays silent the entire day as I do laundry in the basement of the complex. I also run for miles until I come back to the apartment, weak with exhaustion. After a shower and I rehydrate, I leave the apartment again, desperate to get away from the heavy silence of my place. I do some pointless shopping, picking up a few more sets of lingerie and some new running shorts. By the time I crawl into bed that night, I feel numb as I try not to care about the mess I'd made of the weekend.
Chapter Eight
The following morning I’m closing my apartment door behind me with my backpack slung over my shoulder, when I see Jeremy in the hallway. He's just stepping out of his own apartment, and as soon as he spies me, he strides over, his brown eyes demanding answers as he pauses in front of me. “What the hell went down over the weekend? Ace has been a complete crabass, and when I ran into Caleb yesterday, it was obvious someone clocked him real good. When I asked Ace about it, all he did was grunt.”
“What did Caleb say?” I ask cautiously.
“He said he got what he deserved. That's it. I asked if it was Ace and he shook his head. There's something going on with the three of you, isn't there? I wanted to invite you out last night with the crew, but Ace wasn't havin' any of it,” he says.
Hearing confirmation that Ace doesn't want me near him causes a lump to rise in my throat. My eyes drop, and I look down at the car keys in my hand.
Jeremy sighs. “What's going on, Zo?”
I chew my bottom lip, cautiously at his apartment door. “Is Ace still home?”
“Yeah. He's got class soon.”
“Walk me out to my car?” The last thing I want to do is run into Ace. Not if he's still angry with me.
He nods, and we both turn and begin to walk towards the elevator at the end of the hall. Jeremy reaches out and presses the button before looking at me expectantly. “What kind of shit went down this weekend?”
“It's complicated. I...said stuff I shouldn't have to Ace when I was angry.”
Recognition flashes in Jeremy's gaze. “Poison made an appearance,” he guesses dryly.
The sound of my nickname causes shame to sweep through me. They call me Poison, because I'm a total bitch when I get riled up. How is any of that normal? How had it not bothered me before? I draw in a deep breath, tucking some hair behind my ear as I try not to let Jeremy see how upset I am. He must sense it though, because he draws me into his arms and hugs me. For a second, I tense up before his warmth seeps into me, and I relax, my arms creeping up to wrap around his waist. I don't deserve him.
“Whatever was said can be fixed. Ace doesn't hold grudges,” Jeremy assures, kissing the crown of my head affectionately.
“This time's different,” I whisper. Ace isn't the type to offer comfort. He’d been trying to help me, and I'd kicked him to the curb. Hell, I'd practically butchered him with my mouthful of razorblades. I've always known he cares for me. I'd played on his feelings, and I’d cut him where I knew it'd hurt.
The elevator doors ding as they slide open, announcing its arrival. We step out of the embrace and enter the elevator. Jeremy presses the button for the first floor, then turns and studies me. “You leave town this weekend? I dropped by your place twice, but you weren't home.”
I look at him with surprise. I hadn't known Jeremy was looking for me. “I was busy. You could have sent me a text.”
He gives me a look. “Right. You avoid talking about anything unless it involves bullshitting someone. If I'd asked about what was going on between you and Ace, you would have made it a point to avoid me.”
I shrug, because he's right. The only reason we're having this conversation is because he took me by surprise this morning, and I feel like shit. There's also a little part of me that is okay with talking about what went down, because it's Jeremy. After two days of hiding out, I think I needed to see him this morning. He's my link to Ace.
“Just talk to him, Zo. Have you even tried?”
My head shakes.
“Well, maybe he's waiting for you to get over whatever the issue was,” he suggests. Then he gives me a questioning look. “What started it all?”
“Trust me, you don't want to know,” I mutter as I shift my backpack on my shoulder.
“Whatever happened started the mess you're in. Yeah, I want to know.”
I shake my head. “I got in a fight with Caleb, and that shit fell onto Ace as well. That's all I'm saying.”
Jeremy's head cocks to the side. “Wait, so something went down with you and Caleb as well?” I watch as his brow creases before his eyes widen. He looks at me incredulously. “That was you that punched Caleb?”
“Guilty,” I say with resignation as the elevator doors open up, and I step out into the hall.
“Damn. I knew I should have gone with Ace on Friday, but I'd already made plans with Charlie and Dillon. So, what did Caleb do? Anything I need to throttle him for?” he asks as we make our way down the back hall to the exit.
“Don't get involved, Jeremy. Just stay out of it, and let things play out as they play,” I say lightly as we enter the parking lot. The sun is shining brightly, and I wish my mood was in a better place. It's going to be a gorgeous day today.
Jeremy suddenly blocks me, and I pull up short, looking up at him questioningly. He studies me, his eyes searching mine. “Did he hurt you?”
“No,” I lie.
His eyes darken. “I'm serious. If he did something to you, he shouldn't be around us anymore.”
“Jeremy, you have no idea what went down, and I'm telling you it's not worth losing Caleb's friendship over. I swear I'm fine, and you need to just let it go, or you'll make it worse.”
He runs a hand through his short, dark hair. “I don't like being left in the dark.”
I arch an eyebrow. “Has AJ gotten wind of any of this?”
“No.”
“Now that's a guy that's been left in the dark,” I point out before I move around him to walk across the parking lot to my car.
~*~
The beauty of the day
draws me out of my funk, and after my last class lets out for the afternoon, I make my way over to Brotman Hall where the Lyman Lough fountain is located. I settle near the fountain, pulling out my laptop and my binders as I work on my current project. I figure maybe I can dredge up some interest in it if I'm outside, letting the sun chase away my problems.
I have my nose in my binder when someone clears their throat above me. I look up to see Caleb. His backpack is slung over one shoulder, and his hands are in his pockets. His expression is reproachful as he waits to see if I'm going to cut him down before he can even open his mouth. The bruise on his jaw stands out, even with the scruff that he still hasn't shaved, and it dawns on me that I'd hit him harder than I'd thought. Then my eyes drop to my right hand where bruises color my knuckles. My hand still smarts with pain when I use it.
“Hear me out?” Caleb asks quietly.
I'm silent for a long moment as I debate whether to hash this out with him or not. Caleb's nothing but trouble. But the fact that I put that bruise on his jaw has me feeling like I should at least stick around long enough to hear him out. Plus, I think I owe him an apology for resorting to violence. I close my laptop, then secure my papers in the binder before setting them on my backpack. I look up at him and nod.
Relief flickers across his features, and he looks to my left before looking at me questioningly. “Mind if I sit near you?”
“Afraid I'm going to give you another bruise to match the one you've already got?”
He rubs his sore jaw as his lip quirks up slightly. “I'll take another bruise over having my dick cut off.”
“Remember that, do you?”
He gives me a look. “You nearly dislocated my jaw. I heard your threat afterwards even through the pain. Figured I'd better take your shit seriously considering you back up your threats.”
I just shake my head at him.
He sits down next to me and he draws his knees up slightly, his wrists settling on them as he looks out over the students milling around. “I was piss-ass drunk Friday night. I was having a shit day and took to drowning my bad mood in a bottle of whiskey,” he says bluntly. I hadn't expected him to get straight to the point, so I stare at him with surprise. He doesn't look at me as he speaks again. “I remember everything. You actually wanted to sober me up and get me a cab.” He sighs, regret flickering across his features. “You were the only one that seemed to read my mood and knew alcohol wasn't going to get me anywhere. Then I insult you, chase after you and...” his voice trails off, and he winces before rubbing his hands over his scruffy face.
Poison Me Sweetly (Long Beach Series Book 1) Page 11