by Patricia Kay
That night, lying in bed, she made plans. She would go home the next day, and as soon as the holiday break was over, she would give her notice, asking to leave in February so that she could move to San Antonio before she began to show, as well as to be there when Joy gave birth. Since the assistant principal already knew about Joy, there would be no reason to make up any kind of cover story. She would not, of course, let anyone know about her own pregnancy. Well, she’d tell Beth, but no one else.
What about Dillon?
Dillon.
She’d been trying hard to keep thoughts of him at bay. As the father of her baby, he deserved to know. But would she tell him? What if, like Aidan, he wanted no part of her pregnancy? Could she handle that? Worse, what if, out of duty, he asked her to marry him? She couldn’t bear that. If Dillon ever asked her to marry him, she wanted the reason to be that he had realized he loved her and didn’t want to live his life without her. All things considered, wouldn’t it be better all around not to tell him at all?
But what if he found out anyway? And was furious that he hadn’t been told? But how would he? If she moved to San Antonio before she began showing, how would he know?
On and on her thoughts raged. And in the morning, she was no closer to an answer than she’d been the night before. The one thing she did know was that she wanted to see an obstetrician in San Antonio before leaving for home. She found one who was part of her PPO and lucked out when she called, because there’d been a cancellation only minutes earlier and the woman who answered the phone slotted Sophie in.
“Yes, you’re definitely pregnant,” Dr. Kelsey said later. She was the kind of no-nonsense doctor Sophie particularly liked. “I see you’re single. Is the father in the picture?”
“No.”
“Do you plan to tell him?”
“I haven’t decided yet.”
“I always think it’s best to tell the man, even if you think he won’t want to be involved. Saves a bit of heartache later, in many cases.”
Sophie nodded noncommittally.
Dr. Kelsey prescribed prenatal vitamins, gave Sophie some literature to read and asked her if she wanted her to recommend a doctor in Crandall Lake.
“No, I’m planning to move to San Antonio in February,” Sophie said.
“Okay. I’ll need to see you in a month.”
“No problem.”
Sophie had said her goodbye to Joy before leaving for the doctor’s office, so she headed for the highway and home. Already she was feeling better. In fact, it would be lovely to have two babies. They would grow up together and have a close and loving relationship, almost like twins. Plenty of single mothers raised more than one child. She had a good education, great experience and she would be able to hold down a good job. Of course she could do it. Not that everything was going to be easy. She was sensible enough to know there would be rough times ahead, but she’d had rough times before. She was strong. She would be fine.
After she arrived home, the first thing she did after unpacking was call Beth. “Can you meet me for lunch tomorrow?”
“If you don’t mind waiting till one. I’m working half days this week.”
Beth wanted Mexican food, but Sophie wasn’t sure her stomach could handle it and persuaded Beth to have Italian instead.
Beth was already seated at a table in Genaro’s when Sophie arrived. Over salads and garlic bread, the two friends caught up.
“I had the most wonderful Christmas, Sophie,” Beth said, her eyes glowing.
“What’d Mark get you? A new car or something?” Sophie teased.
“Something even better,” Beth said. She grinned.
“Well, come on, don’t keep me in suspense.”
Beth leaned over the table and said sotto voce, “I’m pregnant, Sophie!” Her face glowed.
“Oh.” Sophie was momentarily speechless. “I—I’m so happy for you, Beth.” But under the happiness, her heart ached. Beth was pregnant. If Sophie could only stay in Crandall Lake, their children would grow up together and be best friends the way their mothers had been.
Beth frowned. “What’s wrong?”
Beth always could read her like a book. Sophie took a shaky breath. Fighting to hold back tears, she said softly, “I—I’m pregnant, too.”
Beth’s eyes rounded.
“I wasn’t going to tell you yet.”
Beth put her fork down and simply stared at Sophie. “Holy cow, Sophie. What are you going to do? It’s Dillon’s, right?”
“Of course it’s Dillon’s. Who else’s would it be?”
“So...you’re gonna have the baby?”
“I would never consider anything else, Beth. You know that.”
“But what about Joy’s baby? I thought the plan was you were going to adopt her...or him.”
Sophie sighed. The urge to cry was gone. “Yeah, I am. So I’ll be raising two babies instead of one.” She took a drink of her iced tea. “When are you due?”
“July. July 15, the doctor said. And you?”
“July 30.”
Beth laughed in delight. “Oh my God, Sophie. Our kids will be like twins! And they’ll grow up together.”
Sophie shook her head. “No, Beth, I’m definitely leaving here. In fact, I’m giving my notice when I go back to school next Tuesday. I’m going to move to San Antonio as early as the school will allow me to. Hopefully by the end of January. Before I begin to show.”
Beth slumped in her seat. “Oh, Sophie, I was hoping you’d change your mind.”
“I know. But this will be the best thing for everyone.”
“But...what about Dillon?”
“What about him?”
“He might feel he has a say in this, too. Maybe he’ll want to be a part of the baby’s life.”
“I don’t know if I’m even going to tell him.”
“Oh, Sophie.” Beth shook her head.
“What? You think I should?”
“He’s the father,” Beth said quietly. “Don’t you think he has a right to know?”
“I’m not sure he has a right to any consideration at all.” Sophie knew she sounded bitter, but it was hard not to. Dillon had disappointed her so many times.
“You feel that way now because you’re still angry with him. But later, I know you’ll change your mind.”
“I’m not so sure about that.”
“But Sophie, don’t you think, under the circumstances, he’ll want to marry you?”
“I don’t want him on those terms.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, if we were ever to get married—and don’t hold your breath!—I want it to be because he loves me. I want what you have with Mark. I don’t want Dillon because he feels guilty or obligated to me. That would be horrible, and not a good way to start out.”
Beth sighed heavily. “I understand. I guess I’d feel the same way. But, Sophie, I hate to see you so unhappy.”
“But I’m not unhappy! I’m actually excited. My life is going to be so different from what it is now.” And if Sophie didn’t wholly believe that, she knew it would eventually be true.
“It won’t be easy, raising two children on your own,” Beth pointed out.
“I know that. But when has my life ever been easy?”
Beth reached across the table and grasped Sophie’s hand. “I worry about you, Sophie.”
Sophie smiled and squeezed Beth’s hand. “I know you do. Thank you. And, Beth?”
“Yes?”
“I’m really happy for you. You know that, don’t you? I don’t want you to be sad about me. It’s going to work out. And we’ll see each other often.”
Beth made a face. “But only if I come to San Antonio, right? I mean, I can’t see you coming here with two babies. Woul
dn’t the tongues wag then?”
“We’ll see. Maybe by then I won’t give two hoots what anyone thinks or says.”
But down deep, she knew she would care. She also knew that no matter how much she had reassured Beth, their conversation had reawakened her misgivings. She might be telling Beth all would be well and she was happy about her pregnancy, but was that really true?
Weren’t her problems just beginning?
And was she entirely sure she could handle everything she would be facing? Especially alone?
* * *
Dillon spent the holidays in Columbus with Aidan. A couple of days before Christmas, his agent called him and invited him to lunch. “I’ve got a proposition for you.”
“Oh? What is it?”
“Let’s wait until we see each other, okay?”
“Okay.”
Now they were seated across from each other at a popular eatery in downtown Columbus. They had just been served their appetizer and Paige had outlined an offer she’d received on his behalf the previous day.
“So, what do you think?”
Dillon stared at her. Paige had just given him an offer from Penn State to become the assistant to the offensive coach for the varsity football team. His responsibilities would be heavy involvement with the quarterbacks and tight ends. Dillon had never expected an offer like this so soon. He had imagined he would have to have a few seasons of high school coaching under his belt before any college would pay attention.
“Say yes,” Paige said. “You aren’t going to get a better offer. Not unless you want to go into analysis or play-by-play.”
As flattered as Dillon felt by the offer and as much as he knew he would enjoy the job, he couldn’t push thoughts of Sophie out of his mind. Did he really want to leave Crandall Lake? Did he really want to say goodbye to her again? “Can I have a few days to think about it?” he finally said.
Paige sighed. “Don’t take too long. They’re not going to wait around forever.”
That night, Dillon took out one of the pieces of stationery from the desk in his hotel room. Always before, whenever he was considering some kind of big change, he made a list of the pros and cons.
An hour later, his list looked like this:
Pros: (1) he would be closer to Aidan and could keep an eye on him, (2) the money was considerably better, (3) he would be doing something more challenging than high school football, and (4) there was a lot more opportunity for advancement than his job in Crandall Lake afforded.
Cons: (1) he would be cutting Sophie out of his life completely, (2) he would be leaving Texas and the hill country, an area he loved, (3) he’d be leaving the first home he’d ever owned, and (4) he would not get to see Aidan’s child grow up.
By morning he was still no closer to a decision than he’d been the night before. He and Paige had arranged to meet for breakfast, and he knew she wasn’t going to be happy with him.
He was right. “Dillon, I can’t believe you’re waffling on this. I thought you’d be ecstatic. This offer is everything you’d hoped for.”
“I know,” he said. He ate some of his pancakes, stalling for time. Finally he decided to be entirely honest with her. “The trouble is, I really don’t want to leave Texas. And...I don’t think I want to go back to northern winters.” He’d almost said something about Sophie but quickly stopped himself.
“Why didn’t you tell me this before?”
“I guess I didn’t realize how I felt until you told me about the offer.”
Paige sighed. “Okay. I guess I’ll have to change direction. Or do you want me to stop looking for something else altogether?”
Dillon shook his head. “No, keep looking. I, uh, might even consider Oklahoma. But I prefer Texas.”
Later that day, as he thought back on the conversation, Dillon hoped he’d made the right decision. He told himself Sophie’d had nothing to do with his decision to turn down the Penn State offer, but he knew that wasn’t quite true.
All in all, it was a good Christmas for him and Aidan. Aidan seemed a lot more subdued and mature than he’d seemed even a couple of months ago, and Dillon realized Joy’s pregnancy had affected him a lot more than he’d let on. Dillon wondered if Aidan was sorry about his decision to leave Crandall Lake and decided to ask Aidan about the situation again. It was three days after Christmas and they were having breakfast together at a local café.
Aidan didn’t answer at first. Meeting Dillon’s eyes at last, he said, “I think about Joy...and the baby...a lot.”
“Are you sorry about leaving?”
Aidan shrugged. “I don’t know. I thought this was the right thing for me, but now I’m not sure. Nothing’s the same, you know? I thought...coming back...being with my friends again...everything would be better.”
“And it’s not?”
“No. Everybody’s kind of...moved on. You know?”
Dillon had never felt more sorry for the kid. He had just learned a hard truth: it was impossible to recapture the past. You really couldn’t go home again. Once your life changed, it was changed forever. “Do you want to come back to Crandall Lake? You can, you know. But if you do want to, you’d have to make up your mind right away. Right now you’ve only missed a few weeks of school there and you could probably catch right up, but if you wait any longer, it’ll be harder.”
“I know. I—I’ve been thinking about it.” He played with his napkin. “If I did come back, maybe I could see Joy on the weekends? If she wanted me to. I—I could be there when the baby’s born.”
“Yes, you could.”
Aidan frowned. “But what about the condo? You signed a lease.”
“That’s not a big deal.” Dillon would lose a month’s rent by breaking the lease, but that wasn’t important—not compared to what Aidan was facing.
For a long moment, Aidan stared off into space. Finally he turned back to Dillon. “Are you sure you want me back?”
“I never wanted you to leave in the first place,” Dillon said.
Aidan’s smile was slow in coming, but when it did, it was the most genuine smile he’d ever given Dillon. “I’m sorry I’ve given you so much trouble.”
Dillon couldn’t help the surge of pride he felt. Aidan was growing up. “That’s in the past. Let’s concentrate on the future.”
“Yeah.” Aidan sighed. “Do you think this is the right thing to do? I mean, it’s all settled...and everything. Joy...she might not want me around.”
“You’ll never know until you ask.”
Aidan nodded thoughtfully.
“No matter what she says, you have a right to be in your baby’s life if you want to.”
Aidan nodded again. “But I wouldn’t want to do anything Joy didn’t want me to do. I—” He hung his head. “I hurt her enough.”
For some reason, Sophie’s image popped into Dillon’s mind. But he quickly pushed it away. This wasn’t about him and Sophie. She wasn’t the one pregnant. This was about Aidan and Joy. They might be young, but they still had a right to make decisions about their lives without interference.
“You know, Aidan, once Joy knows how you feel, she might surprise you. Give her a call. Talk to her.”
“I wish...”
“What?”
“I wish I could see her. Not just call her.”
Their eyes met again. Dillon searched his nephew’s for any sign of doubt. He saw none. The kid really did want to see Joy. And maybe, just maybe, this was the right thing to do. “I could probably get us a flight to San Antonio today.”
The spark of hope in Aidan’s eyes was all the incentive Dillon needed. He picked up his cell phone and found the website he always used to book travel. Fifteen minutes later, minus a twelve-hundred-dollar hit to his MasterCard, he and Aidan were booked on a two o’clock flight to Houst
on. They would arrive in San Antonio at eight tonight. Dillon had also gotten them rooms at one of the older downtown hotels. The River Walk hotels were all booked for New Year’s.
Surprisingly the holiday didn’t seem to impact the airline’s performance, and their flight out of Columbus took off on time. They landed a few minutes ahead of schedule at Bush Intercontinental in Houston and had plenty of time to make their connection to San Antonio.
Exiting the plane at the San Antonio International Airport, Dillon wasn’t prepared for the heat. He should have been, but the ten days he’d spent in Columbus had made him think it was cold everywhere. He and Aidan shed their coats and headed for the rental car desk.
It was nine-thirty before they checked into their hotel. Too late to call Joy, they decided.
“I’ll just drive you over there in the morning,” Dillon said.
“Don’t you think we should call first?”
“What if she says she doesn’t want to see you?”
Aidan nodded. “Yeah. That’s a good point.”
“If you just go there, you’ll have the element of surprise on your side.”
Dillon hoped Aidan slept better than he did. His mind churned with possibilities. He and Aidan had already discussed what they thought was the best plan if Joy agreed. Aidan would finish his senior year in Crandall Lake, spending as many weekends in San Antonio as he could, and he would be there when their baby was born.
After that, everything depended on how Joy felt. And they wouldn’t know that until Aidan talked to her. What Sophie would think about this development bothered Dillon, because he was pretty certain she would not be a happy camper. She would be especially angry that she hadn’t been consulted first.
But Dillon still felt he was doing the right thing.
And if she didn’t agree, if this made her even more furious with him, he guessed he would just have to live with it.
Chapter Eleven
Sophie slept in on Friday morning. She woke feeling groggy, but at least she wasn’t nauseated. She’d been afraid the pasta she’d eaten the night before might disagree with her. Deciding she’d feel even better once she showered, she headed for the bathroom.