by Adele Abbott
As I got closer, I could hear noises coming from inside the van, and assumed it must be Megan.
“Morning, Meg—” I froze.
The occupant of the van wasn’t Megan, unless she’d really let herself go since the last time I’d seen her. The zombie had somehow climbed inside, but didn’t have enough brain (if indeed he had any) to get out again. He was walking back and forth, crashing into the sides of the van.
“Morning, Jill.” Megan suddenly appeared in her doorway.
“Hi.” I quickly pushed the van door closed.
“Thank goodness.” She came around the van to join me. “When I got up this morning, I had a horrible feeling that I’d left one of the van doors open last night.”
“Nope. They’re both shut.”
“You must think I’m ditzy. It’s just that I had such a hectic day yesterday that by the time I got home, I was out on my feet.”
“I have days like that too.”
Just then, the zombie thudded against the wall of the van, so to distract Megan, I quickly thumped the side. “These are excellent vans. I wouldn’t mind getting one.”
“Really? What would you use it for in your line of business?”
“I—err—I could use it for undercover surveillance.”
“Of course. Well, I’d better get going. I have an early appointment.”
“Wait!” I screamed at her.
“What’s wrong?”
“I—err—just wondered if you could give me a lift. My car won’t start.”
“I’d be happy to, but I’m not actually going into Washbridge. My appointment is in Middle Wash.”
“That’s lucky. I have to meet with a client in Middle Wash this morning.”
“You do? Right, well climb in.”
“Do you mind if we have the radio on?” I didn’t wait for an answer; I just turned the volume to ‘max’. My eardrums were on the point of bleeding, but at least we couldn’t hear the zombie.
We were halfway to Middle Wash when Megan pulled into a layby.
“I’m sorry, Jill.” She turned down the volume. “I don’t know how you can stand it that loud. It’s giving me earache.”
“Sorry. I wasn’t—”
Just then, there was a thud in the back of the van, followed by another.
“There’s someone in the back.” Megan was out of the door before I could stop her.
I jumped out and rushed around the back to find her about to open the door.
“Stop!”
I cast the ‘sleep’ spell, and caught her before she slumped to the floor. After casting the ‘power’ spell, I carried her back to the driver’s seat. Once she was settled, I made my way to the back of the van, threw open the door, and fired a ‘thunderbolt’ which blew the zombie to smithereens.
Once I was back in the cab, I reversed the ‘sleep’ spell, and Megan woke up.
“You’re right,” I said.
“Sorry?”
“The music was too loud. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”
“Right, yeah. Okay.” Still a little confused, she drove on to Middle Wash.
“Where do you want me to drop you, Jill?” she asked when we arrived in the village.
“Anywhere here will be fine.”
“How will you get back after you’ve finished your interview?”
“Don’t worry. I’ll get a taxi.”
“I’d offer to take you home, but I’m going to be working here most of the day.”
“No problem. Thanks again for the lift.”
Once she’d driven off, and I’d made sure there was no one else around, I magicked myself back to the house.
Zombies: Nil.
Jill Gooder: One.
***
Mr Ivers was in the toll booth, but he didn’t even look up when I pulled up. I was just about to call to him when a mechanical arm swung out.
“Drop the cash onto the hand please, Jill,” Mr Ivers said.
I did as he asked, and the arm swung slowly back inside.
“That’s quite ingenious,” I said.
“Thank you. I had to come up with something for the sake of my elbows. My cousin is an engineer; he was the one who made it. I call it Andy.” He laughed. “Get it?”
“That’s—err—almost funny.”
***
Jules was at her desk. Her eyes were red, and she’d obviously been crying.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s nothing, Jill.”
“Come on. There’s obviously something the matter.”
“It’s Dexter.”
“What’s he done?” If that werewolf had hurt her, I’d kill him.
“He left me.”
“Do you mean he’s dumped you?”
“No, well—err—I don’t know. Maybe. He left me behind in West Chipping, yesterday.”
“I’ll make a cup of tea, and you can tell me all about it.”
“Everything was okay at first. I thought we were having a lovely day. We went to the park, and then we had a delicious meal in the pub near to the duck pond. I was just thinking how much nicer Dexter was than Gilbert, when he jumped up, rushed to his car, and drove away.”
“What did he say?”
“He didn’t say anything. He just drove off.”
“Had you been arguing?”
“No. One minute we were chatting, and the next he’d gone.”
“What did you do? How did you get home?”
“I had to call a taxi.”
“Have you tried to get in touch with him since?”
“I’ve phoned and texted, but he hasn’t replied. I don’t know what I did wrong.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong. Where does he work?”
“Why?”
“I just wondered.”
“At the exhaust centre near to the library.”
“Right. Will you be okay to work today?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I need something to take my mind off what happened.”
“Okay. I’ll check on you later to make sure you’re alright.”
“Thanks, Jill.”
I was relieved to find that the cat count in my office was back to just the one.
“I see Socks has taken the kids back. I bet you’re glad to see the back of those little monsters?”
“Not at all. I’m missing them already. They were a lot of fun.”
“You were ready for drowning them before Peggy came to your rescue.”
“Okay, I admit Peggy did help a little.” He gestured to the outer office. “The pretty young thing has been crying since she got here. What’s up with her?”
“It’s that new boyfriend of hers.”
“What’s he done?”
“I’m not sure, but I intend to find out.”
“You haven’t forgotten that you’re taking me to the solicitors tomorrow, have you?”
“Of course not, but I wouldn’t go building up your hopes. It may amount to nothing.”
“I have a good feeling about this. Why would he go to all the trouble of tracing me unless he was going to leave me a substantial amount? I was looking at watches online earlier. You can get some really nice ones for less than ten grand.”
“You know what they say about chickens, don’t you?”
“That they love to cross the road whilst being mysterious about their motives?”
Halfway through the morning, Jules came through to my office. At first, I thought she was still upset, but then I realised her expression was one of anger.
“It’s that woman.”
“Sorry, Jules, you’re going to have to give me a little more than that.”
“The Nailed-It woman. She’s out there with a man. I don’t know how she dare show her face.”
I glanced at Jules’ hands. “I see you managed to salvage your nails.”
“It took me ages, and they still aren’t as good as they were before I went to her stupid nail bar. Do you think I could sue her, Jill?”
�
��I don’t think it would be worth your while. Deli isn’t exactly rolling in money. Would you show them in, please?”
I’d never seen Deli like this. Usually, she was larger than life, and the life and soul of the party, but today, she looked defeated. Nails had to help her into the office.
“Deli? Are you okay?”
“It’s all gone wrong, Jill.” She slumped into the chair. Nails stood behind her with his hands on her shoulders.
“What has?”
“The nail bar. Everyone is complaining. They’re all saying I’ve ruined their nails.”
“What went wrong? I thought you’d done a course?”
“I did, but I’ve never actually had to work on a real person before. The correspondence course provided us with artificial hands to practise on. The real things are much more difficult. I don’t know what to do, Jill.”
Before I could say anything, Nails chipped in, “I’ve told her that she should let me take over.”
“You?” I couldn’t hide my surprise at his suggestion.
“I’ve always done Deli’s nails for her, haven’t I, lover?”
She nodded.
“Show Jill your nails,” he said.
She held out her hands, and although I was no expert, her nails did look a million times better than Jules’ had after her trip to Nailed-It.
“It’s supposed to be my business,” Deli said.
“It still will be, lover. I’ll just hold the fort until you’ve had time to get up to speed on real hands.”
“Who will I practise on?”
“You can practise on me, in the evenings,” he said.
I was really touched by this show of affection from the usually undemonstrative Nails.
“What do you think I should do, Jill?” Deli said.
“I don’t see you have any choice but to let Nails give it a go. Things can’t be any worse, can they?”
“I suppose you’re right.” She took a moment to compose herself. “Okay, enough of feeling sorry for myself. Let’s do this.” She stood up. “Thanks, Jill.”
“I didn’t really do anything.”
“You’re a good listener. Mad always said you were. Come on, Nails, your next appointment is in ten minutes.”
***
When I pulled into the exhaust centre, I was greeted by a grease monkey who had a cigarette butt stuck behind his ear. “Looks like it’s a new car you need, love, not an exhaust.”
“I’m not here for either, and I’ll thank you to keep your comments to yourself.”
“It was only a joke, Mrs. No need to get your knickers in a knot.”
“Where can I find Dexter?”
“Are you his new bird? He never mentioned he’d found himself an older woman.”
“Shut it or I’ll shove that spanner where the sun doesn’t shine.”
“I like a bird with a bit of spark.” He grinned. “Dexter’s over there on his break.”
Dexter was the only person in the small staff room. When he saw me, he stood up and backed into a corner. He looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights.
“Jill? What are you doing here? Is Jules okay?”
“What do you think? Some lowlife left her stranded in West Chipping yesterday.”
“I can explain.”
“This should be good.”
“It’s actually all your fault.”
“Wow! You’ve really got some nerve.”
“It’s true. I’d done my best to get out of taking her out yesterday, but then you more or less forced me into it.”
“What’s that got to do with the price of fish?”
“It was the full moon yesterday.”
My heart sank as I realised what I’d done.
He continued, “I hoped I’d be able to get her back home in time for me to go to the Range in Candlefield, but she was enjoying herself so much that she wanted to stay. I waited as long as I dared, but then I had to make a run for it. If I’d stayed any longer, I’d have turned. I dread to think what might have happened then.”
“It’s my fault, Dexter. I should have realised what you were doing when you said you had to work on your car. I’m sorry.”
“How is Jules?”
“Not great, as you can imagine.”
“She’s tried to contact me, but I don’t know what to say to her.”
“Don’t worry about it. This is my mess, so I’ll sort it out. You’d better give me your phone number, so I can let you know how I get on.”
Chapter 7
I headed straight back to the office where Jules still looked down in the dumps.
“I’ve just been to see Dexter,” I said.
“Why?”
“I had intended to give him a piece of my mind, but it seems that he had a very good reason for leaving you in the lurch like that.”
“Really? What?”
“When you were in West Chipping, he received a text to say his grandmother had been taken seriously ill. For a while, it was touch and go if she’d make it or not.”
“Why didn’t he say anything?”
“His mind was in a whirl. All he could think of was that he needed to get to his grandmother’s bedside before—err—in case—you know.”
“Poor Dexter. And I said all those awful things about him. How is his grandmother? She’s not—?” Her voice trailed away.
“No, she pulled through, but she’s still in hospital. That’s why he hasn’t got around to answering your calls or messages.”
“Do you think I should try to call him again now?”
“It would probably be better to wait until he contacts you. I’m sure you’ll hear from him soon.”
“Okay. Thanks for doing this, Jill.”
“No problem.”
Once I was in my office, I made a call to Dexter.
“I don’t have a grandmother,” he said. “They both died when I was a toddler.”
“It’s too late to change the story now. It shouldn’t matter, anyway. Jules will just be pleased to hear from you, but I would wait until later today or tomorrow. Just make sure you stick to the story: your grandmother took very ill, but is a little better now.”
“I don’t like the idea of lying to her, Jill.”
“Do you have a better idea? You can hardly tell her the truth, can you?”
“I suppose you’re right. Thanks for your help.”
“It’s the least I can do. I was the one who got you into this mess.”
“What was that all about?” Winky asked, after I’d finished on the call.
“I’m trying to help sort out Jules’ love life, but it means her boyfriend, Dexter, will have to tell a little white lie. I can understand him not being very happy about doing that because I hate having to tell lies too.”
Winky burst out laughing.
“What’s so funny?”
“You’re a compulsive liar. You lie even when you don’t need to.”
“That’s rubbish. I don’t remember the last time I told a lie.”
“There! Right there. That’s another one.”
***
The West Star advertising agency occupied the top floor of the Nexler Building. The receptionist directed me to the large office suite at the far end of that floor. Inside the suite, a smartly dressed woman greeted me.
“You must be Jill Gooder.” The woman came out from behind her desk. “I’m Ruth Foot, Thomas’s PA.” She offered her hand. She was wearing what was probably the ugliest ring I’d ever seen. It took me a few moments to work out what it was, but then I realised it was shaped like a small foot.
“Nice to meet you, Ruth.”
“It was a present from my mother.”
“Sorry?”
“I saw you looking at my ring. My mother gave it to me a few months before she died.”
“It’s very—err—unusual.”
“A one-off. She had it specially made. It’s a foot. Like my name.”
“Right. Is Thomas around?”
&nb
sp; “He’s up on the roof. He has a cigarette break every hour on the hour. Can I get you something to drink while you wait?”
“No, thanks. I’m okay. Have you worked here long, Ruth?”
“Since the very beginning. When we first moved in, the suite you’re now standing in was the whole of West Star. Back then, I was PA and general dogsbody to both Thomas and Stephen.”
Before I could ask any more questions, the door behind me opened, and in walked Thomas Bradley.
“I’m sorry to have kept you waiting.”
“No problem.”
“Ruth will no doubt have told you about my disgusting smoking habit.”
“I’m surprised you’re allowed to smoke up there.”
“Officially, we’re not, but it’s such a long way down to the street. The owners of the building send around a memo every few months, reminding us of the smoking ban, but I ignore it. Anyway, would you care for a drink?”
“Ruth has already asked me, thanks. I’m fine.”
“In that case, why don’t you come through to my office?”
“This is very impressive.” I glanced around. “It puts mine to shame.”
“It wasn’t always like this. When we first moved in, this room was actually two offices: one was mine, the other was Stephen’s.”
“Ruth tells me she’s been with you from the start?”
“That’s right. How she’s managed to put up with me for so long, I’ll never know.”
“Is it okay if we get straight down to business?”
“Of course. I’m all yours.”
“I’m curious to know whose idea it was to come to me after all of this time?”
“It was mine. Georgina wasn’t very enthusiastic. She didn’t think there was anything you could do that the police haven’t already done.”
“When you came to my office, you said that you and Georgina had become close after Stephen’s death.”
“That’s right.”
“When I spoke to Georgina by herself, she told me that you and she were having an affair before Stephen was murdered.”
“She told you that?”
“Why didn’t you mention it before?”
“I thought I was protecting her. I’m very surprised she told you.”