My focus moved back to my knuckles. I cleared my throat and asked, “Why is it these shallow little cuts always burn more?”
“It’s because they’re not deep enough to trigger the pain receptors like a deeper wound does. That’s why paper cuts never seem to stop hurting,” she explained matter-of-factly as she placed little Band-Aids on each knuckle. A tiny frown formed between her eyebrows as she worked.
“Huh. Interesting.”
She was placing the last Band-Aid on when she added, “And because you’re a big baby.” She flicked a playful glance up at me through her lashes. That look did little to calm my heated blood.
My hand remained in hers as she went down the line and checked each bandage was properly stuck to each finger. “Nice hands,” she mumbled and I hardly heard her.
“What was that?” I asked. Had she just complimented my hands? I would need her to say that louder. I needed that recorded actually.
She shook her head and stood up and away from me.
She took a deep breath, and before she could speak, I said, “Look. I want to apologize for Friday night …”
“We should talk about it,” she said, seeming to choose her words carefully. “I’m the one who needs to apologize. I was just caught off guard. When I learned that you were William’s partner—”
“Skip’s business partner,” I inserted.
“Right. It just threw me off. I was in work mode. I’m trying for a promotion and there is a lot at stake. Still. I’m sorry.”
She leaned back on a shelf, looking down on me with sincere regret. I was still crouched on the bucket covered in tiny bandages. I wasn’t feeling my most masculine at the moment but again Skip’s words played in my head. She needed to feel comfortable to open up. So I hugged my knees planted almost to my chest, feeling like a giant man-child. I’d endure far worse to see that light returning to her that I first saw in Denver.
“I didn’t mean to bombard you. My plan was to tell you who I was before the meeting with Vincent,” I said. I tried to cross my leg but almost tipped over, so I uncrossed it and tried to look serious. “And I didn’t know who you were the night we met in Denver, I promise.”
She nodded like she believed me. “I think I’d—”
Just then the little door to the janitor closet opened and light spilled in. Roxy stood up straighter. Vincent stood framed in light.
“Roxanne. I was just looking for you.” His gaze then found me sitting like the naughty kid wearing a dunce cap. “Mr. Olsson.” One sharp eyebrow cocked. “Everything okay?”
Roxy stepped forward. “Minor mishap. He was helping me move a box. I’ll fill out an incident report for the supplies,” she said in a brisk business tone I was growing accustomed to. Unfortunately.
The well-dressed man nodded. His sharp eyes looked to Roxy and back to me. Then back to her again. “I was looking for both of you,” he said. “Let’s go back to my office to chat.”
Roxy wouldn’t look at me. Instead, she nodded and followed his retreating figure. I would have been more hurt but getting off that bucket with my ass half asleep required my full attention.
Roxy
After the fiasco at the drive-in, I spent the weekend preparing for my next encounter with Sanders. I replayed the relief and disbelief of seeing him again, only to have it dashed by my own selfish worries about my career. I knew I had hurt him but damn, I could have used a warning that night. A weekend of talking myself up all thrown out the window as soon as I saw him. I had a whole speech prepared about a professional working relationship and how important it was for me to focus on my work. And then the second I heard that voice, smelled his soapy man smell, I was a goner. He was catnip and I was a pussy.
And now here I sat between Vincent and Sanders, trying to get my bearings.
I checked back into the conversation when Vincent addressed me. “… But what I’m hoping for, Roxy”—I didn’t miss how he emphasized my name—“is that you two will work closely with MooreTek. They’re a big client for both of us. Based out of California. They’re coming next week for a corporate retreat, and if they’re happy, it could mean a lot of potential future business. It will be good to see how you handle an event of this size,” he finished to me.
He clasped well-manicured fingers on the desk which looked marginally more tidy since the last time I had been in there. Based on the fact that his phone hardly stopped buzzing during our entire conversation, he still had a lot on his plate. Vincent proposed to Sanders that Outside the Box work directly with the Lodge for the visiting corporate account. It would be a chance to see what corporate adventuring was all about and how it could integrate with the Lodge. When I glanced to the side, Sanders was grinning ear to ear. I fought the instinct to roll my eyes at him.
“This is fantastic,” he said. I felt him look to me but I stayed focused on Vincent. “Of course I’ll have to check with my co-owner,” he finished in a more serious tone.
“William?” I asked, finally turning to him.
“Skip, yeah. He only had great things to say about his meeting with Roxy,” Sanders said pointedly to Vincent.
The other man nodded. “That’s what I hear.” Vincent held my gaze until I was worried there was something on my face. I fixed my bangs and looked away. What else had he heard about me? I swallowed down my fears and stayed focused.
“I thought Skip was supposed to come out here?” I asked, keeping my tone light.
Sanders nodded seriously. “Ah, yeah. He really wanted to. But some stuff came up at the corporate office, so I took one for the team.”
The more Sanders spoke, the more I felt like he wasn’t exactly telling the truth. His sexy Aussie accent flared up more on the ends of his sentences, growing more pronounced as he spoke. Southerners do this thing where sometimes their statements sound like questions. Apparently so did Australians.
Vincent continued, “The group will arrive next Monday. They’ll be here for one week with about ten members from their upper-management team. From what I understand they are struggling to innovate and cooperate with each other. They’re hoping some fresh air and the Smokies magic will invigorate the team.” Vincent picked up his phone and began to scroll as he spoke. “I can do my best to help out, but to be frank I’m drowning in other responsibilities and would like to leave the heavy lifting on this to you two.”
I shifted in my seat. Us work together? I had already done most of the planning for this event. Rooms were booked. Continental breakfast provided by Donner Bakery was included and they’d paid for lunch in advance too. They’ll be on their own for dinners but there was always the restaurant in the Lodge or they could go into town—
“We’ll take them camping,” Sanders interrupted my internal list making.
“What?” My head snapped to him.
“What’s a better way to bring people together than camping?” His blue eyes were wide and bright. He was like a puppy that caught its first ball.
“I don’t really camp,” I started.
“It’ll be great. We’ll teach them to fish and to clean and grill it. How to start fires.”
“I don’t think the rangers of the national park forest would like that …”
“Maybe even a little rock climbing.”
“Whoa. Whoa—” I said, holding up my hands. “The liability alone, that’s just not feasible.” I turned to Vincent, eyes wide and with horror at Sanders’ ideas.
Vincent looked back at me pointedly. “I trust that you two will work together on everything. Roxy, can you help Sanders with whatever Outside the Box needs, since I can’t help? I want the Lodge to support this idea fully and see if it works out for us all.”
I blinked at Vincent. Stuck together? Well, shit. I didn’t even know how Sanders and Outside the Box worked. I needed schedules. I needed to know every single detail of every day. What was Sanders thinking? That we’d go hiking and camping and just figure out the rest with the client? This wasn’t a campfire and we weren’t singing kumba
ya. Sanders flinched slightly when I turned to him in shock. I didn’t need a mood ring with this face. Not that I could help it, just like he couldn’t help his own goofy little smile.
Vincent watched our interaction closely. I swallowed. I was supposed to be the professional, show him I could handle this position. No biggie. I could do this.
I wanted to scream but instead I smiled and said through gritted teeth, “I’m sure whatever we decide as a team will be great.”
Vincent leaned forward, eyes looking between the two of us. “That won’t be a problem, right? There’s no reason you two can’t work together?” he asked.
“No,” I said instantly.
At the same time, Sanders said, “Nope.”
Vincent nodded once, a hint of doubt in his gaze. “I’ll let you all handle the details. This is important. I trust you will do what is best.”
I sat rigid, while next to me, Sanders practically vibrated with barely contained energy.
Vincent smiled briskly, glancing at his watch to signify the end of the meeting.
“Thank you,” I said.
Sanders and I walked in silence until we were outside. He wasn’t following me exactly and I hadn’t dismissed him. We walked to where a light dirt trail skirted the path between the main lodge and the forest behind it.
Sanders and I together all week? This wouldn’t work. Oh, I had said what I needed to say for Vincent. But I didn’t need this lovely man and his distracting smiles muddling up my focus. Bless his heart.
What would the SWS do?
They would do what they needed to get the job done.
So could I.
I came to a stop and took a deep breath. It was fine. Tall pines swayed in the summer breeze. There was only the sound of our breaths and the creaking of the trees in the wind.
“It’s beautiful out here,” Sanders said, breaking me from my thoughts.
When I looked to Sanders, he was studying me with soft eyes before he quickly looked away. It sent a shudder of longing through me.
All at once I understood with complete certainty that this partnership wasn’t going to work without some ground rules. I respected Vincent’s wishes to work with Sanders, but there were too many complications between us. I couldn’t stand here and pretend that working together would be easy. We needed strict boundaries and a set path.
“Listen, Sanders. I think we should make things clear.”
“Good idea.” He watched me so eagerly, so openly. Too openly. His earnestness left him vulnerable. Someday someone was going to shatter his rose-colored glasses and it wouldn’t be me.
“Friday night, I didn’t react well,” I started carefully choosing my words. “Like I said earlier, I was caught off guard by you being here in Green Valley. I didn’t expect to ever see you again.”
“You didn’t want to see me again?” he asked.
I hesitated. “I just—” I struggled to find a thread of the speech I prepared. “If I had known that you were the other half of Outside the Box, Skip’s partner, I would never have … I don’t want you to think that my behavior that night was in any way an attempt to persuade you to do business with the Lodge.”
Sanders blinked, his eyebrows rose in genuine surprise. “I never thought that. Not even for a second.”
He stepped closer. I didn’t retreat though every inch of me wanted to run away. “I didn’t know who you were either. I just needed to see you again. It felt important.”
I frowned at the ground.
“Tell me you didn’t feel that too,” he said.
“You flew across the country …”
“Just a few states, really.”
“For a connection?” I finished.
“For destiny. And I notice you haven’t denied it.”
“Sanders, you can’t talk like that,” I said. I held up a hand and took a step back. Boundaries. Plans. “The way I acted that night was out of character, that isn’t who I am.” It was though, wasn’t it? That was the real problem.
“We would have met again eventually because of work. I just took Skip’s place temporarily. It’s not as dramatic as all that. Think about it. We would have met again.” When he put it that way, the anxiety eased up a bit in my chest.
“This is all just too much,” I said honestly.
“Why did you want to leave things that night? Why so final?” he asked boldly. He wouldn’t let me look away.
I couldn’t look into those blue eyes without wanting to pour everything out. “I…I—”
“Tell me. Did I do something?” He looked so open and vulnerable again. Gah. He had to stop doing that.
“Please.” His hands reached for me but then dropped and stuffed deep into his pockets. “You can be honest. Was it me? Did I push too hard?”
“No. It wasn’t that.” Didn’t he remember that it was my idea to go back to the hotel? A fresh wave of shame burned my cheeks.
I couldn’t handle his puppy dog eyes.
“Roxy?” he pleaded and moved closer. If his eyes were catnip, then his masculine scent and the heat of his body was straight heroin to my system. I was powerless. He continued, “I know your career is important to you. My career is important to me too. Let’s leave all that back there.” He gestured to the Lodge. “Right now we’re just two people standing in the forest. We’re a man and a woman that met in a club. Tell me what’s going through your head and then back to business. I just want to understand.”
I glanced around and then forced myself to focus on his face. Tentatively, I explained, “That night, things were moving too fast. I’m not in a place to think about anything other than my career.”
There were a million other things I wanted to explain but I couldn’t even have this conversation with my best friend, let alone a business associate.
“It’s best if we move forward as coworkers. Maybe even friends. And that’s it,” I finished.
Something shuttered behind his smile. A hand rubbed his chest. “Thank you for being honest with me.”
I chewed my lip and nodded once.
“I’m so sorry I bombarded you Friday. I was just really excited to see you again.” Hear that? That was the sound of my charcoal black heart cracking open. “About the Lodge,” he said, “Outside the Box could pull out. If I messed this up. I’ll talk to Vincent and explain. We don’t have to do this if you think it’ll be too weird.”
I didn’t know this version of him. He seemed distant, professional, probably trying to mimic how I had acted toward him. He actually seemed a little worried. Dammit if it didn’t make me want to hug him. This was what being around him did to my brain. It made me all touchy-feely.
“No. Don’t. It really would be fantastic for the Lodge. And for Outside the Box.”
“Right. Yeah.” He nodded looking at the ground.
“You have a life and family in Colorado, I’m sure. A completely professional relationship would be for the best,” I emphasized again.
“Of course.”
I kept myself very still, my face purposely blank. I knew this was for the best. I knew I couldn’t risk being around him, not when he spoke so openly and sweetly. It was like asking a kleptomaniac to house-sit, I couldn’t be tempted like that.
“For this MooreTek business. I have everything planned. There are a few afternoons free where you can schedule in your activities.” I shifted from foot to foot. “I will email you the itinerary and you can go from there,” I said.
“Wait, what? Vincent just told us to stick together like glue.”
“I know what he said. But I work better alone. Plus, it’s better for you. Think of this as a group project and all you have to do is show up and get the grade.” I fixed my bangs when a breeze blew through them.
As I spoke, his smile slipped off his face. I steeled myself. This was all for the greater good. WWSWSD?
He ran his hands through his hair, looking like he was debating on saying something.
Finally, making up his mind, he said, “Sur
e. I understand. See ya around.” He turned and headed back to the Lodge.
When he was out of sight, I leaned against a tree to catch my breath. I pressed my hand to my chest hoping to calm my racing heart. I hadn’t expected it to be so hard to set this line in the sand. I wanted to do the right thing for both of us, so why did it feel so wrong?
Chapter 11
Sanders
My hands shook with unidentifiable emotion as I walked away from Roxy but my smile remained carefully in place. Roxy was struggling with something and needed time. So while I wanted to go back and wrap her in a hug, the smartest thing was to show her I could be patient and respect her wish for boundaries.
Stupid boundaries.
I hated that she was pushing me away. My appearance had not been the happy reunion I’d been hoping for, but Vincent had told us to work together. To tell me she worked better alone was a flimsy excuse to not be around me. I understood it but I didn’t like it.
All joking with Skip aside, I would and could be patient. I would never push myself on her. If friendship was what she needed, then that’s what I would offer. Better to be in her life as a friend than not at all.
Acid churned in my stomach and up my esophagus. What had I eaten? I’d not had anything but eggs and avocado this morning and yet my insides rioted like I’d gone crazy at a six-dollar buffet. I was feeling restless, talking with Roxy had done little to quell the energy. And in fact I was feeling … frustrated? And maybe hurt. I needed to burn off some energy. I needed to get out and clear my head. I hated feeling pointless emotions. Just push that shit aside and move on.
What I needed was to go for an invigorating hike and brainstorm some ideas for MooreTek. I’d present a thorough list to Roxy when we met; I’d be the most professional business partner she’d ever worked with. I wouldn’t try to touch her every possible second. I wouldn’t find ways to get close enough to breathe her in. I would be the best fucking mate she didn’t know she needed.
The One That I Want (Scorned Women Society Book 3) Page 8