by Alexa Kang
For the first time in her life, Mary felt someone had eclipsed her.
Just then, Tessa looked up from the dinner table and caught Mary staring at her. Their eyes met, and Tessa smiled at her. It was a courteous smile that caught Mary off guard. No other girl ever reacted this way to her. The few whose beauty and qualities could rival her were competitive with her. The ones who didn’t compare to her would either want her friendship and approval, or would be intimidated by her. Tessa’s smile showed none of these reactions. Her smile showed only cool disinterest, an obligatory gesture of politeness. Tessa neither cared to please her nor challenge her.
How disappointing. While she was observing Tessa and trying to figure out where they stood against one another, Tessa took her as inconsequential. This had never happened before. She had never been so insignificant to anyone.
She glanced at Anthony. His beaming smile reassured her somewhat, and she smiled back. At least, Anthony’s affection was only for her. But for the first time since they met, she began to have doubts.
In her own world, she was always the winner. Sharing the spotlight with another girl, one possibly more extraordinary than herself, was not in her plans.
Chapter 29
Despite the unexpected presence of Tessa Graham the night before, Mary enjoyed the pleasant and relaxing afternoon with Anthony on the beach. It was good to finally be able to spend their time together away from the university without the stress of schoolwork. She looked forward to dinner at the Cliff Dwellers later on in the evening.
They returned home with plenty of time to dress for the night. Before leaving the guest room, she checked herself. Hair, lipstick, skirt, purse, shoes. Everything was in order.
Wait. One more thing. Smile. And grace too. Can’t forget grace. Now she was ready to go downstairs to wait for Anthony and his family.
As she approached the ground floor, the intense and powerful performance of Rachmaninoff drew her to the parlor. Tessa Graham was at the piano. Fully immersed in the music, she did not notice Mary’s presence at the door.
The expertise with which Tessa performed the piece amazed Mary. Mary herself could play the piano too. She had taken lessons for ten years. But her skills, while excellent, remained in the realm of an amateur. She cultivated her musical skills for the sole purpose of becoming an educated and refined lady. She performed for entertainment on social occasions and volunteered often as an accompanist for charity functions and school events.
What she could do on the piano was nothing like the music she was hearing now. Tessa’s performance was that of a true artist. When Tessa played, she did not produce mere pleasing melodies. She manipulated the musical notes for the most dramatic effect intended by the composer and seized the listener’s heart.
When Tessa finished, Mary could not help but applaud. Tessa looked up, surprised to see her.
“That was outstanding.” Mary came next to the piano.
“Thank you,” Tessa said, her tone remained distant and reserved. “I still can’t compare to my father. He can play so much better than me.”
“Then he must be a virtuoso,” Mary said. Her praises were sincere, but she was troubled by the feeling that Tessa had surpassed her yet again.
The doorbell rang. The maid opened the door, and in came the Caldwells and Alexander’s private tutor. Sophia and Anthony both came downstairs to greet them.
“You must be Mary. I’m Anna Caldwell, Anthony’s aunt.” Anna came into the parlor. Katherine followed right behind her.
Before Mary could answer, Katherine chimed in. “Mary! I’ve been so looking forward to meeting you. I’m Katherine, Anthony’s cousin. I joined the Junior League last summer. I have so many questions to ask you. What are you doing tomorrow? My friends and I will be meeting for lunch at the Drake Hotel. Would you like to join us?”
“Sorry, Katherine.” Anthony put his arm around Mary. “We’ve got plans tomorrow, and every day after that. And right now, we’ve got to get going.” He looked at both Katherine and Tessa. “Sorry to leave you kids, but my father’s waiting at the Club.” He started to lead Mary away. “Come on,” he said to her. “I’ll introduce you to Uncle Leon.” He glanced over at Leon, who was lecturing Alexander to get started with his French lesson while Sophia showed the tutor to the study.
Before they walked away, Mary looked back and smiled at Katherine. “I’ll be here for the rest of the week. We can talk more next time I see you.”
“Yes!” Katherine said and pumped her fist after Anthony led Mary away.
“You kids will be okay by yourselves for tonight?” Anna asked before leaving.
“We’ll be fine, Mother,” Katherine said, annoyed. “I’m going to call my friends.” She left for the den to use the telephone, leaving Tessa alone in the parlor again.
On their way out of the door, Mary turned back and looked into the parlor at Tessa one more time. Tessa had already turned her attention back to the piano. The music of Debussy filled the air, surrounding her with an ethereal aura that separated her from the rest and took her someplace where no one else could reach.
I could never do that, Mary thought to herself. She would never be able to take music to such a high level where it could embody her feelings or who she was.
# # #
Outside, Sophia had gone ahead with Leon and Anna in their car, leaving Anthony and Mary to drive to the Cliff Dwellers on their own. While they drove, Mary could not stop hearing Tessa’s music in her mind.
“Tessa. She’s unusual,” she said to Anthony.
“Unusual how?” he asked.
“There’s something very distant about her.”
He stopped at the crosswalk to let an old lady and her dog pass. “Maybe it’s the British in her. Her father is Dean Graham.”
“The British actor?”
“That’s him.”
No wonder, Mary thought. That was where Tessa got her striking good looks. “I heard her play the piano. She’s very gifted.”
“She is. You play piano too, don’t you? Want to play something for me tomorrow?”
She let out a laugh of disbelief as if he had suggested something preposterous. How could she play for him now? She was not about to draw attention to her own comparative weakness.
“How come you never told me about her?”
“What’s there to tell? She’s a kid living at my home. Don’t mind her. I’ll make sure she and Katherine won’t get in your way.” He looked ahead to the road and moved into another lane, oblivious to the probing tone in her voice.
“What do you think of her?”
“Tessa?” He looked as if he had never given the subject much thought. “She’s kind of reckless and irresponsible. I try to give her advice sometimes but she argues and never listens. I would like to reach out to her more, but no one ever knows what’s on her mind. She doesn’t talk much.”
Mary thought of the way Tessa played the piano. “She speaks through her music.”
“What?”
“That’s how she expresses herself. She’s a true artist.”
“You’re giving her too much credit. She’s an excellent piano player, yes. Maybe she’ll grow up to be a true artist. But now she’s just a kid. What deep thoughts could she have that she has to convey through music?”
Mary didn’t say anything more. Obviously, Anthony didn’t see Tessa for who she was. And if he didn’t see, there was no point in drawing his attention to another girl.
But for the rest of the way, she weighed in her mind whether being Anthony Ardley’s girlfriend was worth it.
Was she jealous of Tessa? No. Not at all. She was too well brought up for that. But that did not mean she wanted to share the stage or be upstaged. In her own world at least, she meant to be the center of attention. Tessa Graham was someone she would rather keep far away from her own sphere. But if Anthony and the Ardleys were to become an important part of her life, Tessa would be there too.
Sure, Tessa would return to England one day
, but when? And what if she did not leave at all? She had already been here for two years. What if she stayed here long enough and became rooted here? What then?
She watched Anthony as he drove. Her doubts about their future together continued to widen.
Chapter 30
While Anthony showed her his family albums the next afternoon, Mary’s mind drifted back to Tessa. Tessa was having more effect on her than she should allow. Her own thoughts clouded what should be a wonderful and successful visit. Her doubts were lightened only by the sweet affections Anthony showed her each day.
He opened the album to pictures of him camping when he was ten, and told her how he and his friend Brandon sneaked out of their tent at night and pretended to be ghosts to scare the others. He flipped through the pages, telling her about his adventures and misadventures while growing up.
They came to the photos of him in high school. Many were photos of him in swimming competitions.
“You won all these?” She pointed to the pictures of him taken during medal and trophy presentations.
“Yes.”
“Where are your championship medals? Can I see them?” It was her intention to flatter him.
“They’re no big deal.” He softened his voice, slightly embarrassed.
“No, really. I want to see them. Do you still have them?” She insisted.
“All right,” he said, his eyes now beaming with pride. “Wait right here.” He left the den to go to the storage room on the third floor where he had put away some of his personal belongings before he left for college.
# # #
When he opened the door to the storage room on the third floor, Anthony found to his surprise the entire room had changed. His swimming competition medals, which he had packed away safely in a box, were no longer on top of the desk where he had left them. The room itself was a mess. A big pile of stuff covered in a large white cloth overtook one side of the room. A rainbow of colors, red, blue, purple, orange, all created by accidental smearing of paint, splattered over every part of the cloth. Canvases and half-finished paintings lay here and there all over the room. In the center, Tessa worked feverishly on a painting with her shirt sleeves half rolled up. Dabs of paint had marked her forearms and jeans. A loose lock of her hair had fallen in front of her face from her ponytail.
“What’s happening here?” he asked.
“I’m painting,” she said without looking up.
“I can see that.” He walked in. “I mean what happened to this room?”
“Uncle William and Aunt Sophia said I can use it as my studio. They said no one uses this room anymore.”
“Where are my medals?” He took the white cloth off the pile and searched through the heap of books, old souvenirs, and collectible items that had long been forgotten.
“I don’t know. What medals?” She paid no attention to what he was doing.
“My medals that were here.” He pointed to the desk, where paint tubes and paintbrushes lay scattered on top.
“Maybe they’re in that pile next to the bookshelf. Why don’t you look there?” She still did not look up.
“Who put them there?”
“I did.”
He went over to the pile, irritated she did not even offer to help him after admitting she had messed his things up.
He found his box among a stack of old books and a mound of old, worthless figurines his father had brought back from his trip to Egypt some years ago. His box had tipped to the side and some of his medals had fallen out onto the floor. Annoyed, he put the medals back into the box, picked it up, and started to leave the room. As he did, he looked at her back and grumbled to himself until he saw what she was painting. He walked up next to her by the easel. On closer look, he saw he was not mistaken. She was painting a man and a woman with long red hair in a naked embrace.
“What in the world are you painting?!”
She barely registered a reaction to him. “You can’t see? Or you don’t know?” She added another touch of gray color to the man’s nether region to create an impression of a shade. “They’re two people making love.”
“This is unacceptable!”
“Why?”
“It’s pornographic.”
“You have a dirty mind.”
“You are the one painting this and I have a dirty mind? Where did you get this idea anyway? You haven’t…you haven’t…”
“I haven’t what?” She looked up from the painting. He looked back at her, unable to say out loud the question that had sprung to his mind.
But she must have guessed what he wanted to say. “How dare you even think that?” she asked, indignant.
“Sorry,” he apologized. That was over the line. How could he have asked her that? He felt his face burning.
She turned back to the painting. “I’ve seen photos and magazines. Nudity is often shown in fine arts too, you know.”
Yes. But not nude people in the act, he thought.
“And I’ve seen my parents.”
“Your parents?” He couldn’t believe what he heard. “You spied on your parents?”
“Of course not. Why would I do that?” She leaned slightly away from him, aghast at the suggestion. “But I lived in the same house with them all my life. I couldn’t help seeing what was going on. Haven’t you ever seen your parents?”
“Stop! Stop right there. I am not having this conversation.” He took a step back.
“You sound disgusted,” she said. “There’s nothing disgusting about what my parents did. I’ve never seen anyone more passionately in love than my parents.” Her eyes turned tender and dreamy. “When I fall in love, I want to be just like them,” she said softly, more to herself than to him.
He broke into laughter.
“What’s so funny?”
“Who’s going to fall in love with a moody wild child like you?” He couldn’t resist teasing her. This was the first time he had ever seen her act like a normal girl. Before she could answer, he walked out of the room. “See you later.”
Furious, she threw a paintbrush at him, but he had already closed the door. The paintbrush hit the door and fell to the ground, leaving her alone in the room, livid.
Chapter 31
“You have to come with me tomorrow night,” Ruby said to Tessa over the phone. Tessa could hear through the receiver the background noises of people at the USO Center where Ruby was. “It’ll be fun. I promise.” She wanted Tessa to go swing dancing with her and two soldiers she had met.
“I’m not sure.” Swing dancing no longer occupied her life like last summer. For one thing, Jack was gone. The dance halls weren’t the same without him. Other things had changed too. Baseball games threatened to cease as more and more players went off to war. With the gas ration in effect, people went to fewer places. Sugar was rationed too, and the Montmartre no longer served their delicious mousse and tarts.
This summer was nothing like the last. Henry took a bussing job at Murphy’s again, except now he took on more shifts. Tessa was immersed in her new passion for painting. Ruby volunteered at the USO Center. It started as a sincere effort on her part to support the armed servicemen, but these days, she mainly went there to meet boys. The USO held parties and dances. She had asked Tessa to join her many times, but Tessa always declined. This time, she thought Tessa might say yes if they went to the Melody Mill.
“Henry’s coming too,” Ruby said. “Please, Tessa. You have to come with me. I don’t want to be the only girl.”
“What about your other friends you usually go to the USO with? Why don’t you ask one of them instead?”
“Because I want you to come.”
Tessa smiled to herself. She figured Ruby wanted to impress those two soldiers by bringing along a friend who could dance well.
“You should come,” Ruby urged. “You haven’t gone dancing at all this summer.”
Yes. It had been a long time. “It feels strange to go without Jack.”
“I bet you he’s dancing up
a storm at a USO center somewhere right now, wherever he is. He likes it too much not to. Don’t you want to keep up so you can dance with him again when he comes back?”
When Jack comes back…
Could she keep up with him if he did?
“All right. I’ll go.”
“That’s great. We’ll pick you up at nine o’clock tomorrow night. Be ready.”
Tessa hung up the phone. Tomorrow would be a good night. Uncle William and Aunt Sophia had a special black-tie fundraiser to attend for the Chicago Hospital and they would be out until late. Anthony had invited his friends over for some kind of special dinner for Mary. No one would be paying attention to her. If she didn’t tell anyone, they wouldn’t even know she was gone and she could return home whenever she wanted. The timing was perfect.
# # #
Tonight was a special evening. Anthony had spent weeks planning this dinner to introduce Mary to all of his friends who did not attend UC. He had invited his old classmates from before college, fellow members at the local swim club, and several neighbors. By introducing her to them, he wanted her to know he would openly acknowledge who she was to him to everyone he knew. Formalities like this mattered to her.
As he expected, Mary charmed and impressed all of their guests. She was knowledgeable and well versed on every subject that came up, from music, to art, to current events. After dinner, they brought their lively conversations to the parlor. The atmosphere of the evening became relaxed and Matthew, one of Anthony’s high school friends who was home for the summer from Princeton, suggested they should have some music.
Having been to the Ardleys’ home before, Matthew took it upon himself to pick out a selection of music from the album collection in the den for everyone to enjoy. On his way back to the parlor, a young woman coming down the stairs ran smack into him and almost knocked him over. The stack of records he was holding dropped onto the floor.