by Stacey Weeks
“Are you OK?”
She jumped. Callused fingers caressed her shoulder and her eyes sprung wide. William sat so close his breath warmed the spots his fingers had just lingered upon. She hunkered down, wishing for a second that she had accepted his offered jacket. Were the shivers trembling down her spine from the cold or his nearness?
Before she could answer, someone behind her cleared her throat. Jenna turned, and warily waited for Linda to speak.
“Jenna, I’m sorry if you heard my son’s rude and unnecessary comment. He has something to say to you.”
Linda thrust David in front of her and jabbed her finger into his back.
“I’m sorry for my rude behavior.” He peered at his mother and she responded with the look all mothers reserve for such moments. “You are not dumb and saying so was unkind. I will think before I speak in the future.” Standing in front of her making a public confession had its intended effect. He withered like a branch disconnected from the vine.
“That’s all right.” Jenna offered a weak smile.
Linda put a supportive hand on her son’s shoulder, and they turned to leave. Jenna watched quietly for a few minutes. The Linda she knew never would have apologized. Things did not add up here in Bayview.
William touched her arm. Had he watched the whole exchange with that puzzled expression on his face?
“I’m fine.” She wearily turned her attention to the gathering crowd, eager to hear the announcer present the blue ribbons.
Tucker and Lucy joined them, and she didn’t miss the questioning look Tucker sent William, or the casual shrug William offered back. They shared none of the comfortable banter they’d previously enjoyed. If only the brewing storm could blow some of the tension away as easily as it stirred the crispy leaves.
William lowered his lips to her ear. “So, what happened back there?” He jerked his thumb toward the Red Cross booth.
Jenna shook her head and pressed her lips together refusing to answer. She couldn’t put it into words.
He waited, as if he expected her to say or do something. Well he’d have to wait longer. She didn’t know what she felt, let alone how to explain it. She had sworn at Parker’s graveside she would never again be duped by a charming man. Yet here she was, barely into her job, nearly swooning under William’s natural charisma. This time she wasn’t some naïve teenager ready to succumb to his magnetism and be easily persuaded into trusting him. But how was she supposed to tell him all that?
The phone clipped to his belt blasted out a familiar theme song for a popular children’s cartoon, shattering the moment. Jenna sagged when his heated gaze shifted from her and his warm hand move to his belt to unclip the phone.
She had wanted to trust William, more than she realized. But a whirling tornado of insecurities threatened to carry her off, leaving in its wake a magnitude of destruction. The sooner they finished this project and she moved back home, the better.
“OK, I’m on my way,” William said.
“What’s going on?”
Tucker’s phone rang. The same ringtone. Alarm raised the pitch of her voice to an embarrassing squeaky level. “What’s going on?”
“There’s a fire.” William’s gaze found hers. “At Linda’s. At the farm.” His voice cracked.
Her hand froze half way to tucking a loose strand of hair around her ear. It clumsily hovered in the air somewhere around her chin. “Why did they call you?”
“I’m on the volunteer team, remember? Take my truck. I’ll ride with Tucker.” He pressed his keys into her palm, and before she knew what was happening, William was gone, following Tucker through the crowd. She held Lucy with one hand and clutched William’s keys in the other, digging them into her palms and welcoming the distraction of pain.
“Don’t worry,” Lucy said with the innocence only a child holds. “Daddy always says that God will protect them.”
Jenna’s smile wavered. She felt uncertain about many things concerning William, but one thing suddenly crystallized. She did not want him anywhere near a fire.
And she didn’t trust God to protect him, either.
5
The Scott residence lit up the cloud-covered sky. Murky smoke swirled toward the heavens mocking the thunder snow, the thick flakes no match against the scorching flames licking the exterior of the home. Emergency vehicles, volunteers, and lingering friends made parking anywhere close to the home a nightmare. Jenna slammed her hands against the steering wheel. “Urggg!”
She jerked William’s truck to the side of the road, parked, and jumped out, trudging up the slippery slope against the flow of muddy water trailing downhill. A hellish glow soared to great heights lighting her path. Burning wood hissed. Jenna crushed her eyes into slits and tugged her scarf up over her stinging nostrils against the bitter odor of charred wood. Every breath still managed to soil her from the inside out.
Despite the surging crowd of panicked onlookers and the frenzied actions of the local fire crew, she zeroed in on William the minute she stepped onto the property. Her internal GPS instinctively sought him out. Relieved, her heart slammed against her ribcage. He was safe.
He moved with precision, barking out orders. William had always been a good-looking guy. But tonight, this capable man matured before her eyes. No longer the boy she once knew, she finally saw him the way he really was. A man of action. A man who cared about others. A rugged hero with a strong jaw and a half smile that showed up at the oddest times. She yearned to catch his eye, but instead, he slipped his mask over his face, scooped up a hose, and trudged toward inferno with her brother on his heels.
Everything stopped.
She didn’t breathe, didn’t blink, didn’t move. The two men she cared about more than anything else in the world stepped inside a firestorm to battle a beast that devoured everything in its path.
Black smoke poured from warped and melting windows. A team of men hacked into the roof. But none of that mattered as much as what those two men faced inside. A wailing siren sounded in the background. Walls rumbled and collapsed. Her knees buckled.
“Are you OK?” Strong arms caught her.
She peeled her eyes off the horrific scene but her blurry vision couldn’t focus on the man before her. She clawed against invading darkness and reached for whatever lifeline she could. She would not faint. She needed to be here for William, for Tucker.
Capable hands guided her to a tree stump and nudged her into a sitting position. She fought to regain her equilibrium with each raspy breath.
Her rescuer stooped until he was eye-level. “Breathe deep or you’ll hyperventilate.”
His calm manner contrasted her internal chaos. She can do this. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Her vision cleared. “Thank you.”
“It’s not easy, is it?”
She ripped her eyes away from the accumulating ashes that was, just moments before, a family home and looked at her rescuer. William’s father. They shared the same eyes and the same crooked smile.
“I’m Carmen, William’s dad.” He held out a hand.
“I remember. Hi.” She slipped her small hand into his surprisingly soft and warm one. Did all the Scott men have such similar auras of competence?
“It doesn’t get any easier.” He squatted beside her and followed her gaze.
“What doesn’t?”
“This,” he gestured to the blaze. “Waiting for him to emerge. Ever since his mom died and we lost Paul, I listen to my old police scanner. I need to be here. To watch. To pray.”
She scooted over on her stump and patted the vacant spot beside her. He sat down and they silently watched the axed doorway for signs of life.
She wrapped her arms around her body and rocked, thinking about all the things that could go wrong. William near such danger did crazy things to her heart. She might sway from wanting him close to pushing him away like a child pumping back and forth on a swing, but she didn’t want to lose him.
The unwelcome revelation alarmed her.
&
nbsp; Carmen placed his hand on the back of her quaking body. Without asking permission, he prayed. “God, please be with Tucker and William. Give them safety, wisdom, and strength to fight this fire. And please comfort Linda and David over the loss of their home. We pray for Your will to be done and for each of us to willingly accept Your will as best.”
A feeling of peace swept over her. Maybe everything would be OK.
A loud crash followed by crackling and popping sent them scrambling to their feet. She clutched Carmen’s arm. There they were! One of them, she couldn’t tell which, held a wiggly dog desperate to get down, and the other had a stack of books. “Thank you, God!”
William ripped his mask off and Linda flung her arms around him. He pulled her in close and she buried her face in his heavy coat. Jenna’s instant happiness peeled like a sunburn. She pushed away from Carmen.
The cozy scene across the yard roused questions, just as many as this odd meeting with Carmen did. Did he seek her out, or was saving a woman in distress just something all the Scott men did on a regular basis?
“Yes, thank you, God,” Carmen echoed, jerking her attention back to him. “You know—” He turned her way and stuffed his hands into his front pockets. “—when William’s mom was sick, he took it hard. If I ever thought I’d lose one of my boys, I expected it to be William, not Paul. William refused to deal with his grief. He lashed out at everyone around him to numb his own pain, set on a path to self-destruction.”
She flattened her lips. Did he know she was a casualty of William’s chosen path?
“I thought after his mom died I had lost the both of them. Then, you came around.” The corners of his eyes crinkled.
“Me?” she squeaked.
“Yes. You changed everything for him. I know you left for college right after graduation, so you likely didn’t see the change. But God took that seed you planted in my son and grew this man.” He gestured to William, who stood with his fire jacket off and held a dog while it licked his soot-covered face. “This man of God.” Carmen looked squarely into her eyes. “I am indebted to you, Jenna.”
She squirmed at his unquestionable sincerity. She didn’t deserve his praise for directing his son to faith, the same faith that later let her down in every conceivable way.
She tried to focus on Carmen, but her eyes kept sneaking back to William and Linda, huddled close in a private conversation. She ached to know the details of their conversation. Just as strong as she ached to not care.
They were engrossed in each other and the delightful puppy now nipping at David’s fingers. With David huddled between them, they looked like a family pulling together in tragic circumstances.
Fear set up camp in her heart. They were family.
“It’s nice to see you again, Mr. Scott. Thank you for your help today when I, well, you know.” She dipped her head to hide her warm cheeks.
“It was nice to see you, too,” he said. “I’m praying for you, Jenna.”
She hoped her fabricated smile looked real. It was the best she could do. She needed to get out of there. Fast. She spotted Mrs. Windot, her old Sunday school teacher, organizing a team of ladies. “I think I’ll join those women.”
“You’re here to help? That’s really kind of you, Jenna. I’m sure my daughter-in-law will appreciate it.” Mr. Scott’s warm smile heaped guilt onto her heart. Now she had to make good on that comment.
She simply nodded and wandered toward the ladies gathered around a collection of books and pictures pulled from the house. Carmen Scott talked a good game regarding William, but she wasn’t convinced anyone could really change. It would take a whole lot more than a nice speech to convince her of that. She glanced back up at Carmen, who still watched her from the hilltop, and caught William hiking up the slope toward his dad. She left just in time.
She cleared her throat. “Hi ladies. I’m here to help, if I can.”
The circle widened and the women pulled her into their plans to help Linda and David recover from this loss. What had she just committed herself to? And why was Carmen praying for her?
~*~
William watched Jenna join the group of ladies crowding around the belongings pulled from the house. Mrs. Windot was busy barking out orders and organizing salvaged items into boxes. He tried to catch Jenna’s eye, but failed.
He meandered up the slight hill to where his dad sat on the tree stump, waiting, like always, to make sure his son was OK. “Hey, Dad.”
“Good work tonight, son.” Carmen stood and slapped William on the shoulder and pulled him into a side hug. “You did good.”
“Thank God Linda and David were at the festival. I can’t even imagine—”
“Don’t go there. We’ve lost enough, no need to play the ‘what if’ game.” Carmen’s husky voice caught like it did every time the conversation steered anywhere close to William’s mom or brother.
William swiped at his eyes. They had lost so much. But praise God they weren’t burying his nephew and sister-in-law tonight. “Was that Jenna with you? Did she say why she came?”
“Yeah. She said something about going to help the ladies catalogue Linda’s belongings.”
Hope plummeted like a snapped elevator car. But what had he been hoping for? That she had come for him?
“So how are things going with you two? Have you apologized yet?” Dad scooted over on the stump and made room for William.
William groaned as he sat down. “I’m pretty sure any trust I had built with Jenna was destroyed tonight when she learned Paul’s wife was Linda Pritchard. Apparently, she hadn’t known.” William shrugged as if it meant nothing, but it meant everything. As far as Jenna knew, he was just as guilty as Linda for her former humiliation.
Jenna didn’t know that he never took the money he ‘won’ on the bet. Nor did she understand that he’d thought the bet was off—right up until the moment Linda approached them and ruined everything. He should have known better. Back then, Linda’s insecurities brought out her mean streak.
“You never told her?”
William shrugged again. “She wasn’t interested in hearing me out. Not then. Not now.”
His dad levelled a dubious look his way. “Then you didn’t try hard enough. Not then, and not now.”
“She’s shutting me out, dad. Every time I try to talk about the past, she goes cold.”
“Now that doesn’t sound like Jenna.”
“Not the Jenna we used to know, but she’s changed, Dad. She’s harder.”
“Harder or wounded?” Dad gently nudged William’s shoulder with his own.
William had thought, no hoped, that Jenna’s recent interactions meant her heart had softened toward him, but the wall he’d worked so hard to tear down snapped back together when Jenna realized Linda was his sister-in-law.
William pushed himself up, but Dad shot out his arm and sat him back down. “Hang on, son. I haven’t seen such a hound dog look on your face in years. You’ve got it bad.” A smile spread across Dad’s face.
“Yeah, so what?” William stiffened.
“Come on, what’s really bugging you?”
“It’s nothing.” William struggled for words and wiped at his soot stained face.
“Oh, it’s something all right. Spill it.” A small twitch at the corner of Dad’s lips eventually spread into a full smile.
“At first I just wanted her to sign the church contract so I wouldn’t lose the job and the chance to get this reno show, but now I want more. I don’t want to let her down again, but I’m afraid I did.” Heat that rivaled the fire burned up William’s neck.
Dad folded his arms across his chest and a curious glint twinkled in his eyes.
“What?” William tried not to snap, but it he couldn’t help but feel like Dad was teasing him.
“Are you sure your motives toward Jenna are pure?”
“What are you suggesting?” William shot off the stump, nearly knocking his father backward.
Dad waved his hands like a solider wit
h a white flag of surrender. “Take it easy. I’m not suggesting anything sinister, and if you don’t quiet down your partner—her brother—will be up here, and you’ll have to answer his questions about Jenna.”
William warily sat back down on the stump.
“You can kid yourself all you want, but I think what hurts right now is not her pulling back, it’s your pride. Maybe it’s time to admit that there’s more to this than just doing the job and saving Paul’s farm.”
William slumped in his seat.
“If this was just business, then you have nothing to worry about. She’s signed the contract, you’re working on the church. She’ll agree to let the studio film you at work so you can apply for that reality show. You’re set. But it’s more than business. That’s why it’s hard.”
William hung his head. “Ever since Parker died, she’s been struggling to figure out who God is, and where He was during her marriage. I let her down back in high school. She has no reason to trust me. I just don’t want to hurt her.”
“Is it possible that you have feelings for her, William?”
The muscle in his jaw twitched. “I have no plans to settle down, Dad. You know that. I just want to convince her that I’m a changed man and that God didn’t abandon her like she seems to believe.”
“Like how He didn’t abandon me when your mom died? Or Linda when Paul died? Love is always a risk but it is worth taking.”
If it had been anyone but his father speaking, William would have lashed out at the casual reference to his mother and Paul. Besides, he wasn’t here to discuss his own trust issues with God. But he knew better than anyone that Dad’s wounds ran just as deep as his own. “I just want to help her.”
“Then be her friend. It seems to me that you’re trying to fill a void only God can fill. You can’t be her Savior. Don’t even try.”
“I’m not trying to save her. Besides, I don’t think she believes she needs saving. She has this inner strength that amazes me. She took what life offered her and she survived. She might not have all the answers she’s looking for. She might have doubts about God, and who she can trust, but she’s pushing on.”