She stared at him for a long, silent moment before slowly nodding. "It was never necessary before, I suppose. But now that I've discovered some of your secrets, you feel it necessary to convince me you love me.
"I haven't lied to you, ever. I won't start now. There are just some things that I can't tell you at this time. But they don't have anything to do with us. If you don't want to believe anything else, believe that I've never lied about my feelings for you."
Her head ached with confused thoughts. She didn't know what to think. She knew what she wanted to believe, of course. Like a child, she wanted to continue to believe in happy ever after.
Angie recognized that she was in over her head. Nothing in her life had prepared her for a situation where she had to trust her own judgment so completely. She had relied heavily on her uncle's guidance. She realized...now...that she had trusted Zeke because her uncle trusted him.
But Zeke had lied to her uncle. Zeke was a man with a mysterious background and a mysterious past whose presence in her life was shrouded in more mystery.
Once again her impulsive nature had betrayed her.
She loved Zeke Daniels. There was no doubt in her mind about her feelings for him.
The question was: did she dare trust him?
Chapter 10
"I don't believe you!" Zeke growled, slapping his hand on the top of the desk for emphasis. "I don't care what your so-called experts tell you, I was there, dammit! I know what I saw! Of course this man's running an illegal operation, and the records I turned in should prove that fact!"
Zeke sat at a conference table with five of the men involved in the drug trafficking problems on the Texas-Mexico border. The head of the operation had just summarized their findings with regard to the files belonging to Lorenzo De la Garza. .
"All right, Zeke, I can understand your irritation and frustration. All of us were shocked at what turned up on those reports. I'll admit that we thought at first you might have decided to protect him since you married into the family." He paused when he saw the sudden flash of fire in Zeke's eyes. In a more conciliatory tone, he added, "We ran them through cryptology, we did everything possible to make certain they weren't in some kind of code. What we discovered was that the data is exactly what it looks like—meticulous business records for De la Garza's operation... and it's all legal." The man leaned back in his chair, tapping his pencil. "Naturally, we've been stunned by this evidence, since we've put so much time into proving his participation in drug trafficking. What did you see while you were there that makes you believe we've misinterpreted our findings?"
"His life-style, for one thing. The man lives like royalty. Where else would he be getting that kind of money, if not from drugs? He's got his own plane, he has an army of security men around him at all times, he's got the perfect cover to hide behind—his factories where he's supposedly manufacturing goods for export."
"Yes, we know all of that, Zeke. His investments are definitely paying off for him. What I'm asking is, did you ever see any drugs? Did you ever see a transaction where money and drugs were exchanged?"
"Of course not! The man wasn't going to trust me to sit in on something that sensitive. He's too smart for that."
"Didn't you say he used you not only to beef up his security system but as his personal bodyguard, as well? Didn't you travel with him?"
"Yes."
"Were there times when he had you stay behind while he went somewhere alone?"
"No. But I was only there a couple of months."
"Two months is a long time in the drug business. You would have seen something during that time."
"I identified two undercover agents! Don't forget that!"
"But were they on his payroll?"
"They were working for him... yeah.'' "Doing what?"
Zeke paused, rubbing his forehead. He had a headache that wouldn't quit. He hadn't gotten much sleep last night, lying there beside Angie, wondering how he was going to break the news to her that her uncle was involved in running drugs. He also dreaded to tell her his part in the operation.
Now he was being told that Lorenzo De la Garza was not the head of a drug cartel, that he was exactly what he represented himself to be, a highly successful, very rich businessman who was having trouble with a particularly nasty business rival who was trying to stop him in any way he could.
One of Benito Perez's ploys had been to report Lorenzo De la Garza as a member of a drug running cartel. What was now suspected was that Perez had managed to plant drugs in one of Lorenzo's factory shipments, then Perez tipped off the border patrol to make sure the drugs were discovered. The amounts found were enough to encourage the assignment of an all-out surveillance team. When nothing positive was reported back from those assigned to the case, Zeke had become involved.
He thought about the agents he had identified. "All right, I see what you mean. One of the agents worked as a yardman, the other one helped in the kitchen."
"Exactly. They were employees, much like you were. They were paid a wage of sorts, but it wasn't enough to tempt anyone into hiding information."
Zeke shook his head. "So you're telling me that the large-scale, multi-departmental operation designed to flush this guy out in the open managed to find out that he hasn't done anything wrong?"
"He may be doing all kinds of things that are wrong, Daniels," Frank put in. "Just nothing to do with drugs. The man is a financial wizard."
"His records were impeccable," the head of the operation pointed out. "He knows where every peso goes, he knows how and where it comes in. At any given time he has an exact idea where he stands monetarily."
Zeke dropped his head in his hands. His head was swimming. How could he have been so wrong about a man? How could not just one, but two intelligence departments be so wrong about a man?
"Well, he certainly made us all look like fools," he murmured.
"Actually, we managed to do that without bis help. As far as he knows, the yardman found a better job, the kitchen help had a sick mother."
"What about me?"
"Good question. How did you leave? Did you give notice or did you walk out?"
"I eloped with his niece. He's expecting us back home once he deals with this Perez character."
"Then he has no way of knowing that you were working for us. I doubt that he knows you copied the files. We certainly haven't leaked any of the information. I'll admit to a few red faces in our department over this. We've been after the man for almost three years. Three years! This type of news is exactly what we don't want getting out to the press corps—how we're spending the taxpayer's money!"
Another one of the men spoke up. "But we also follow up every lead we're given and the situation looked suspicious to us. Of course it was supposed to. We were shown just enough to whet our appetite, thinking we were on to something."
"It looks like the joke's on me, gentlemen," Zeke said slowly, leaning back in his chair. "Mr. Lorenzo De la Garza has plans to groom me to take over his operation when he retires. I thought he meant the drug trade. I can't believe I so completely misread a situation."
"Don't be too hard on yourself, Zeke," Frank offered after a moment. "We're trained to look for ulterior motives, for cover-ups, for illicit practices."
"Even when none exist!'' Zeke replied. He still had to look at all the implications where he was concerned. What was he supposed to do now?
He could go back to Mexico. He could quit this job and work for Lorenzo for real. He could go back to Angie and explain that—
Explain that he had been gathering evidence to put her uncle behind bars only to discover there wasn't any evidence to be found? Not likely. "Zeke?"
He looked at Frank. "You did a hell of a job for us. I believe your explanations today have given us a dearer picture of the situation. I think we'll let this ruminate your part of the operation. If you decide to take Lorenzo's offer, I'll certainly understand. After all, you're part of his family now. Whatever you decide, let me know, all ri
ght?"
Zeke pushed his chair back from the table and stood. "I can't say I'm sorry about the outcome of the investigation, gentlemen, given my circumstances. Angie would have been devastated with news of her uncle's involvement in illegal shipments of any kind."
Frank stuck out his hand. "At least now we have a new lead. I'll see what happens when we place Benito Perez under a magnifying glass."
Zeke shook Frank's hand, nodded to the other men and left the room. He'd go back to Angie and tell her what had been happening. He had a hunch that Perez would soon have his hands full with other problems and wouldn't have the time or resources to continue to harass Lorenzo.
Zeke felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He could make whatever explanations he had to, then get on with his new life. If necessary he would spend the rest of his life convincing Angie that he loved her.
He was looking forward to that particular assignment.
❧
"Angie?" he called as soon as he opened the door to the apartment.
There was no answer. He strode down the hallway. "Angie, honey, where are you?"
The bedroom was empty. So was the dresser where she had placed a few of her possessions. A sudden pain caught him in the region of his heart when he noticed that the only item on the dresser was an envelope with his name written on it. A sense of foreboding made him hesitate before he picked up the envelope and opened it. Folded sheets of paper lay inside. Fumbling them open, he read:
"Zeke, I've taken the coward's way out, I know, but my feelings for you are too strong to be able to tell you in person that I have decided to leave.
I don't know why you were working for Tio, but I feel you and your government were hoping to find him doing something wrong. I believe that you used my feelings for you for your own purposes, so that you would have a bargaining tool against my uncle.
For everyone's sake I've decided to return to Monterrey. I don't want to be a part of whatever you are involved in. I love my uncle too much to ever allow my impulsive decisions to hurt him.
I hope you will be able to forgive me someday. If you wish to have our marriage annulled, I will agree to whatever necessary. I'll wait to hear from you.
Angela
Zeke sank onto the side of the bed and stared at the feminine handwriting. A part of his mind refused to take in the contents of the letter, focusing on the neat penmanship instead. He'd never seen her writing before. There was so much he didn't know about her.
She loved her uncle. That much he knew. She would never forgive Zeke for what he had attempted to do. Somewhere deep inside he had known that, as well.
What did he intend to do now? Ignoring his feelings for the moment, he knew that he had originally whisked her away from Mexico in an attempt to protect her. She no longer needed his protection.
She no longer needed to be married to him.
He could go back and attempt to explain, or he could accept her decision to get out of his life. He knew what he wanted to do, but for the first time in his life, Zeke discovered he didn't have the courage to face the possible outcome. His feelings for her were too strong to face her when she told him she no longer wanted to be a part of his life.
Zeke stretched out across the bed and closed his eyes. He concentrated on blanking out the memories. He needed every ounce of energy he could summon to help him to forget.
How long would it take for him to recover from the self-inflicted wound of loving Angela De la Garza Daniels?
❧
"Would you care for something to drink, Ms. De la Garza?" the flight attendant asked Angie, drawing her out of her reverie.
Angie glanced up from the magazine she'd been mindlessly studying and attempted to smile at the friendly woman who was being so solicitous to her first-class passengers.
"Thank you, no."
After the woman moved away, Angie dropped the magazine to her lap and stared out the window of the plane. Now that she was on her way to Mexico, there was no turning back. She had to come to grips with what she had done. Tio would want some kind of explanation for her inexplicable behavior. She had so little excuse for her impulsiveness this time. What could she say?
The one thing she knew for certain was that somehow she was going to have to stop running and face the consequences of the decisions she had made in the past few weeks.
Although Tio had strongly resisted the idea of her coming to Mexico at this time, she had come anyway, determined to share with him her dreams of starting a school in the village, of making her home permanently in Mexico. She'd never gotten around to telling him about all her detailed plans. Instead, she'd allowed her instant attraction to Zeke to distract her from her goal. Oblivious to the inherent dangers of becoming intimate with a man she barely knew, she had thrown herself headlong into a relationship.
She had trusted Zeke because she trusted Tio's judgment. What she hadn't taken into consideration was that Tio's trust in the man had to do with his profession, not as a prospective member of the family.
She'd been such a fool... immature, impossibly naive, and irresponsible.
She recognized that at the moment she not only was running from Zeke, she was running from herself, which was certainly an exercise in futility. She sighed, rubbing her hand across her forehead where a throbbing ache had found a seemingly permanent home.
There was no one to save her this time from her impulsive choices. Neither man in her life could rescue her. She had placed herself in a situation that needed to be looked at with maturity, a trait she feared was truly lacking in her makeup.
Fact: she was now married to a man who worked for a foreign government while ostensibly working for her uncle.
Fact: he would not tell her why, an ominous lack of trust.
Fact: she had walked out on a week-old marriage because she didn't know how to handle being a wife.
The question she had to face at this time was what did she do now? Should she warn her uncle of Zeke's dual occupation? If she did, would she be placing Zeke in a possibly dangerous situation? Loyalty to one man could be disloyalty to the other. Did she owe Zeke her loyalty, regardless of their legal tie? He had bed by omitting to tell her some important information about himself, information that might harm Tio.
She closed her eyes, wishing for the wisdom of Solomon to know what to do now. How could she consider staying married to a man who lived in another country when all she could dream about these past few years was to get back home to Mexico? She'd easily responded to Zeke's suggestion to marry when she thought that he would continue to work for Tio there in Mexico. It was another thing entirely to think about living in Washington, D.C., while her husband traveled, leaving her alone.
What she had finally admitted to herself earlier in the day was that she wasn't ready for marriage. Unfortunately for everyone concerned, she had left the discovery of that particular insight a little late. Acknowledging this latest piece of awareness had, if possible, dropped her self-esteem another notch down on her personal evaluation scale.. .causing her to teeter dangerously close to self-loathing.
So where did she go from here, besides flying home to throw herself into Tio's arms? She'd messed up in a really big way, with no idea what to do next.
When the plane reached Dallas, Angie had a two-hour layover. She called her uncle to tell him she was on her way home and to ask him to meet her plane.
"Is Zeke with you?"
"No, Tio. I'm alone."
"But why? Isn't it customary for a couple to honeymoon together?"
"I've left him, Tio. I should never have run off with him like this." She bit her bottom lip, hard, to gain some control over her emotions.
"What did he do to you?" Lorenzo demanded to know.
"It's more like what I did to him. I trapped him into marrying me, then didn't have the courage to live with my actions."
"What do you mean, you trapped him? What's going on with you two?"
"I'll explain everything when I get ho
me, Tio. I promise. I hadn't realized until these past few days how very childish I've been, wanting whatever attracted me without regard to whether it was good for me or not... or if I could handle the consequences. I've discovered that I've made a lot of mistakes recently. Now I've got to face each one of them and do what I can to find a solution."
"I don't understand what you're talking about, but we'll discuss it further when you arrive."
"Yes, Tio. Thank you for being there for me." She hung up before her voice could break.
❧
In the following weeks Angie spent most of her time alone. She took long walks, she visited the village and talked with the mothers, she discussed some of her ideas about a preschool with her uncle.
She made no attempt to contact Zeke. Not that she didn't want to talk with him...to hear his voice again. Not that she didn't miss him with every aching breath she drew. No, she didn't call because she didn't know what to say to him.
She had hoped that he would contact her, that he would in some way open the line of communication between them so that she could attempt an explanation of some of the things she had discovered about herself.
Regardless of her confusion, she knew with a deep certainty that she loved Zeke with every fiber of her being. When he didn't call or return to Mexico, she knew that she had blown any chance she might have had to apologize to him for her behavior.
Angie lost track of the many letters she had written to him, then had torn up. How could she begin to excuse her inexcusable behavior?
She tried to imagine what he was doing now, wondering if he was still in Washington or whether he had returned overseas to work once again.
It was time to pick up the various pieces of her life and get on with what she had to do to survive the emotional backlash of her impulsive behavior.
❧
Zeke rolled over with a groan, burying his head under his pillow to muffle the steady pounding. Why didn't whoever was trying to beat down his door go away?
He'd lost track of time since Angie had left. Days and nights had run meaninglessly together. He'd managed to go to the store and buy some food and several bottles of his favorite brand of bourbon. The bourbon was for medicinal purposes... to help him create amnesia.
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