by V. F. Mason
Forward, never back.
The concept fucking didn't work when it had to do with Vivian and Jake. After a few short seconds, years of training allowed me to put on an indifferent expression to cover my inner turmoil. Catching Vitya’s guilty eyes, I addressed them. “Give me all the information about my son and Vivian.” I paused and then without looking at Dom asked, “What you told me in prison… about her testifying against me. Is it true? Or one more of your lies?” If he had lied to me about this, I wouldn't be able to stop myself from shooting him.
“Yes, it was the truth.” My jaw ticked from the tension swirling within me. Nodding, I strolled in the direction of my wing with Vitya hot on my heels.
He would give me all the answers before I would let the deep fury within me loose.
“Get Yuri, Petor, Gleb, and Dima here now,” I ordered. As he proceeded to do that, I added, “Bring me all the information you have, Vitya.”
“Radmir, we thought it was for the best—”
Grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, I slammed him hard against the wall as he grunted painfully. “You hid my son from me. You allowed me to hurt my woman. The Bratva fucking brotherhood was supposed to take care of them. Instead, you left her to the wolves. Don’t tell me to calm down. Be fucking grateful I’m not putting a bullet through your or Dominic’s head. All of you broke the code.” Spitting the last words, I let go of him and continued my way to my room.
Flipping my phone open, I dialed the number, and when the person picked up, I barked, “Oleg, have the plane ready to go to the States. I’ll be at the airport in three hours max.”
Hanging up, I thought, How can I ask for forgiveness from the only woman I have ever loved?
Vivian
The doorbell ringing distracted me from mixing the salad. I glanced at Jake who lay on his stomach on the fluffy, purple carpet and flipped the airplane book. He raised his confused eyes to me. “Who is that, Mommy?” We rarely had guests visit us, so I could relate to his confusion.
Sending him a smile, I answered, “Don’t know, honey. Let me check.” But before I could open the door, someone unlocked it. In burst Tina carrying a bucket of lilies in her hands, and the bittersweet smell instantly annoyed the hell out of me.
“Surprise!” she squealed, placing them on the small desk by the door as John entered right behind her with several boxes from my favorite bakery, which recently opened next to my studio, just a few blocks away from my house.
“The key is for emergencies only.” I finally found my voice, too stunned at first at their appearance. As much as I loved my baby sister, coming to New York of all places and to my house was highly unusual for her.
She swore the city off the minute she found her ex-husband in bed with one of his mistresses, and her hate for him extended to the place itself.
Tina rolled her eyes, flashing me a wide grin and tugging on her short, orange dress, which barely covered her ass but displayed her amazing legs; no wonder so many magazines compared her beauty to Candice Swanepoel. They could easily be considered twins with her golden locks and blue eyes. “It’s an emergency! You got divorced.” She hushed probably for Jake’s sake and then tickled his foot, causing him to laugh loudly. “Why aren't you greeting your aunt properly, munchkin?” She chased him, and then he jumped right into her arms, leaving her almost out of breath from the fierce hug.
“Aunt Tina!” he screamed, and then his eyes widened as she showed him the box for the Kinect hockey game he had been begging me to buy for ages. I had refused, because he already had enough of those kinds of games and usually got frustrated since he played alone. His friends refused to play with him since he always won.
Leave it to my sister to act all cool and get it for him.
“Like it, buddy?” He made a move to snatch it from her hands, but she raised them higher. “How about showing me how to play it?”
He nodded eagerly, stood up, and turned his pleading gaze on me. “Can we, Mommy?” His crystal clear gray eyes reminded me so much of his father in that moment my heart ached. How could I refuse him?
“Okay, but only for an hour, and then you’ll do a bit more reading.”
“Sweet!” Then he tugged Tina in the direction of his room. “Hurry, Aunt Tina.” She laughed, grabbed one of the boxes, which held his favorite chocolate donuts in it, and with a wink at me disappeared to the far end of the house, leaving me alone with John in the living room slash kitchen.
And that was one of the reasons I planned to move from this place as soon as possible. Back when I was pregnant with Jake, all I wanted was to run away from everyone and live somewhere in peace. This apartment complex seemed like a great idea, especially as it was located near my studio and the neighborhood was good. However, the building was filled with bohemian artists, people settled in their life, and with almost no kids around to play with, Jake got lonely. Most of his friends lived far away, and he couldn't ride his bike there. So my realtor was already searching for a small, cozy house for us in the suburbs of the Upper East Side. I hoped I could use the metro or walk the short distance to work, since I hadn’t gotten a driver’s license. Those damn cars were too scary to drive, I swear.
“I hope we’re not intruding.” John’s tentative voice brought me back to the present, and I shook my head, opening the bakery boxes lined up on the kitchen counter. A giggle escaped my mouth. “Of course not. You even made sure to start with the biggest and end with the smallest.”
He shrugged, plastering himself on the chair with his whole attention on me. “Let’s just say order is important to me.” One of them held my favorite strawberry cream cupcakes, and I couldn't resist dipping my finger into it. I almost groaned enjoying the sweet flavor on my taste buds. “Glad you like them, Vivian,” he said, and for a second the atmosphere in the room shifted, John’s entire face changing as something flashed in his eyes, but it was so quickly gone, I had no time to study it.
Shaking the weird feeling off, I poured black coffee into the cup and placed it in front of him. “You guys know what I like. So what are you doing in New York?” In the distance, I heard Jake shouting to Tina something about defense and quick attack, clearly teaching her the rules of the game.
John sipped his drink for a moment and finally answered. “Tina wanted to check on you after the whole divorce thing. We just found out, or we would have been here sooner.” He sounded so apologetic my brows rose.
“It’s fine, really. Alex and I… we had our differences.” That was the reason we had on the papers in case the press wanted to dig deeper and find out why the Jordan family split.
I was drumming nervously on the table, thinking I should continue preparing our lunch, when John placed his open palm over my knuckles, stopping my movements as our gazes clashed. “You can always rely on us in case you need anything.” Stunned at the contact, a shot of uneasiness spread through me, and I slid my hand from his touch.
My skin prickled from the contact, as if burned, and all of a sudden, I really wanted my sister to come back, because her fiancé acted strange. He never did anything like that before, but maybe that was his way of comforting people?
“Sure” was my only reply, and then, thank God, Tina shouted, “John, could you please come here and play with Jake? I need to grill my sister for information!” He stood up quickly, gave me a curt nod, and left as I exhaled in relief.
Maybe I needed a vacation from this stressful environment, because my mind was playing tricks on me, making even a gesture of kindness seem strange or suspicious.
But for my peace of mind, I’d better not stay with John alone ever again.
Radmir
Running my fingers through my hair in frustration, I paced back and forth in my living room, holding the folders with Vivian’s name on it, trying to calm the raging beast inside me that wanted to snap and shoot dead all the people who hurt his mate.
Brotherhood.
We take care of our own, Radmir.
As long as you are part
of the Bratva, you live under our protection, as does your family.
Bullshit. Fucking lies. No one had my back when I needed it most.
“Give me one reason, Vitya, why I shouldn't kill the pakhan and everyone involved right now?”
Vitya exhaled heavily but kept quiet, not meeting my gaze. While this was hardly his fault considering he had been in Europe back then, he hid the truth from me as well, so it didn't make him less guilty.
The family of a member should be protected at all cost, and if the Bratva failed to do it, a member could ask for retribution. It was our most absolute law.
“Dominic had no say back then, Radmir. Vasya issued an order after your disobedience. He even refused to help you. Why would he care about your woman?” Petor questioned.
“After you refused to kill her dad, he signed your death warrant. If you didn't go to prison, someone would have to off you.” Yuri’s words froze everyone, surprised glances turning to him. He took a big sip and shrugged. “You know how it went with him.”
Yeah, my uncle’s order didn't surprise me. Nephew or not, he only had a soft spot for Dominic in the Bratva. Everyone else was just a member who had to follow the code religiously. Even his own drug-addict son wasn't worth his attention. He wasn't a cruel man, just a man hardened by life’s circumstances. And besides, if you didn't have anything nice to say about the dead, it was better to keep silent. May my uncle rest in peace. God knew I had enough living people to hate.
However, something wasn't adding up here.
“But I kept my status as a sovietnik. How is that possible? He should have appointed someone.”
“He did. He chose Dominic. After his death, Dom was voted in his place and rose to power, he reestablished you in the position,” Gleb pitched in, resting his arms on the back of the couch. “He was also the one who put a guy on Vivian, so we’d know your kid was taken care of. The order was clear; if Jake were mistreated, he would be taken away from the environment.”
Despite my fury, a sense of gratefulness settled inside, because Dominic stayed a true friend even during my years in prison. Given his past though, it didn't surprise me he wanted to make sure Jake didn't suffer. God knew, Dominic and his twin brother, Damian, lived hell on earth during their years of captivity. No one under their watch would suffer the same nightmare.
“She freed me from the prison?” I addressed Dima.
He winced, removing the ice and showing us the purple bruise my fist had left there. “When you were stabbed in the hospital while Dominic faced issues with Cosa Nostra, remember?”
Yeah, hard to forget when five fucking inmates attacked me in my sleep, stabbing me with a knife and beating me half to death with baseball bats. I fought as much as I could, but my strength was no use in that situation. Luckily for me, a guard showed up and stopped it. They had me rushed to a Houston hospital where it took two months for me to get better, and then they placed me back in prison and my case was reopened at that point. No one told me why, just that they got me an alibi. Since several days before that I had asked the pakhan to get me out of there, it didn't surprise me, and I thought they finally found the way.
Fucking one more lie on their end!
“She gave a written alibi for you on the night of Cliff’s death, claiming that you had spent the whole night with her, and then you both went to see Cliff, and then you both went to see Cliff, but he was already dead. You told her to run, and since she was pregnant, she was afraid to speak up.” Dima gasped painfully while touching his puffy skin, and continued, “Stupid as fuck, but the judge had no hold on you anymore since we had an alibi.”
“Dominic said she testified against me. Is that true?”
“Fuck, we are so dead,” Yuri muttered and then finished his drink, throwing the glass against the wall so it shattered into tiny little pieces. “Hope this eases your frustration, and you won’t hit anyone else, because, man, seriously? We thought she did. They presented her testimony as true, although she was never a witness in the case. But the prosecutor claimed she gave a written confession where she blamed you and stuff. Turned out though—”
He shifted his attention to Gleb, who continued, “It was most probably a setup, because during your trial, she was in the hospital. A miscarriage scare or some shit like that. Dominic doesn't know, but Melissa told me. Maybe the paper was fake; we wouldn’t know.”
Yuri’s eyes narrowed in anger as Gleb mentioned a connection to the woman he currently screwed, but he only gritted his teeth and said nothing on that.
“So let me get it straight,” I finally said, as their words and the information in the folder created an almost clear picture in my head. “Her family hated my guts, and she was left alone and pregnant with no means to support herself and the child. She came to the Bratva for help but was sent back home, and by the time Dominic got to know about this, she ended up married to Alex Jordan, and no one knows what happened after?”
They all nodded as hollow laughter burst from me, chilling me to my bones.
Forgiveness.
I thought about giving her my forgiveness?
I was the one who should kneel and beg her to give me a chance to make her mine again, because while she entrusted me with her life, I ended up in jail, leaving her alone.
My woman suffered through those years along with me, and instead of soothing her heart with love and kisses, instead of reestablishing a connection, I pushed her aside and used her body in hatred.
Moya krasivoglazaya.
I would fix it.
Or die trying.
Turning my phone off for the flight, I tried to make sense of the tension in the first-class cabin as the men kept on murmuring amongst each other regarding something, and it confused the freaking hell out of me. They all spoke in Russian, while giving me curious glances.
Radmir was still not present, and finally my patience snapped. “What is going on?” Dominic and the rest of the men turned their attention to me with surprise, clearly not expecting me to say anything.
For the love of God, were they the kind of men like my father who thought women had no voice or say in any matter? Before I could add anything else though, Radmir emerged from the crew cabin as the lady announced through the speaker system for the whole plane to hear. “Is Vivian Jackson on this plane? If you are seated next to her, please inform the crew as she is sought by her father. There is a family emergency.” Panic rushed through me as my palms began to sweat and my heart hammered rapidly against my ribcage while I wrapped my hand around my neck.
No, no, no.
Had my dad used his connection at the airport to stop me from going? Was he that powerful? I couldn't go back. Not now. Not to the life he had planned for me and give up without fighting.
This trip was my only way out of the nightmare they had created with Alex and his father, Julius. As much as America was a free country, I almost laughed at this thought; my father had connections everywhere, even in the police. No one would protect me.
Through the haze of fear and anguish, I hadn't noticed the strong hands that picked me up; my mind only registered it when he took me to the front of the plane where there was a small room with refreshment supplies and he barked at the stewardess. “Get out. Vivian is not on this plane. Get this moving.” Resting my head on his shoulder, I took calming breaths trying to function normally, but I was overcome with the memory of Alex and his strong cologne while he lovingly kissed my knuckles.
Revulsion came back, and I covered my mouth for fear of vomiting right there.
“But… she is here!” The girl pointed at me, her voice trembling as he snapped again.
“Tell them she didn't board. Fix it, Olga. Don’t forget who owns this company.”
She nodded hastily and closed the door behind her, leaving us in the semi-dark place. Radmir at once put me down and made me sit, gave me a paper bag, and ordered, “Breathe, krasivoglazaya. Breathe.” Following his command, I did, slowly inhaling and exhaling into the bag, and in few secon
ds, my pulse calmed down as I blinked the panic away, only the worry staying in my heart. “Good girl,” he murmured, removing the bag and then helping me stand. He pressed my back against the wall as he leaned on his elbow, his scent washing over me and surrounding me like a protective bubble. “Now, answer. What the fuck is going on?”
Swallowing loudly, I answered without even thinking how bizarre this whole situation seemed. “My father… he—”
His eyes narrowed. “Abuses you?” He clenched one hand into a fist, and in an instant, I placed my palm over it.
“No.” As much as he was controlling, he’d never hurt any of his kids like that. We had a happy childhood, but my father just wanted us to live his way. And who would want such a life? I certainly wasn't signing up for it when I had agreed to work in the family business and stayed with them instead of moving away. Maybe it had been my mistake. “He insists I marry Alex Jordan.” Radmir tensed next to me as I licked my dry lips and continued. “They are business partners, and we’ve known each other since we were kids. Alex is a good guy. Well, he used to be before the idea of marriage appealed to him.”
He studied me for a second and then raised my chin, and our eyes locked with each other’s. His stone cold yet curious, and mine probably confused.
“Is he your boyfriend? Do you have feelings for him?”
I shook my head. Just the idea was laughable. Alex, the kid who used to pee on the playground and I’d call for his nanny. It was kind of hard to form romantic feelings, then. “No, we were just friends. I don’t want this marriage. I just… for once I…” Frustration laced my voice. “I’ve always lived by the rules, followed them religiously, thinking it was better than fighting… mostly they suited me. But this one… I can’t,” I finished lamely.
But how could I explain to this man, who probably lived his life as he chose, the meaning of obligation and the other things running through my mind during my growing-up years? Sometimes when you grew up in wealth, you felt like you owed your parents, even if it wasn't the case.