by Debra Dixon
“I wouldn’t bet on it. Bears don’t actually hibernate. They shift gears to a lower speed, but they’re still out there, foraging.”
“You make it sound like they’re ready to gobble me up,” Victoria whispered as she stepped backward and bumped into the door, which swung open.
Joshua’s hand snaked around her waist and pulled her back. “Maybe they are.”
Both of them knew this conversation had nothing to do with bears. Joshua lowered his head and kissed her. He nibbled at her lips, growing more impatient with each touch, but he stopped short of gobbling her up. When he raised his head, he smiled at her. “ ’Night, Vicky.”
Victoria wrote a few notes and closed the chart with a shake of her head. When Wally had given it to her, he’d been as charming as ever. He truly hadn’t seemed to mind that Rachel Shelby wanted to change practitioners. Wonders never ceased, and neither did the passage of time. She could hardly believe it had been two weeks since she’d delivered Rachel’s baby.
When Rachel came out of the examination room, Victoria looked up and smiled. “I want to see you again in four weeks. That will be your last postpartum checkup. After that, unless you have a problem, you can return to an annual checkup schedule.”
“Can I call you back about scheduling the last checkup?” Rachel put down the baby seat. “I’m in the middle of preparations for the family reunion, and I can barely think right now.”
“I’d imagine you barely have time to breathe with a two-week-old infant and a reunion to juggle. How’d that happen?”
“Well, it’s a small family and they didn’t mind switching the location to here at the last minute. I didn’t want to travel with Billy yet, but I really wanted to show him off.”
Victoria looked down at the happy baby who lay in the brightly colored baby seat at Rachel’s feet. He was gorgeous and hadn’t made a peep since Rachel arrived. He opened his eyes occasionally and sighed with contentment.
“He’s ready to travel,” Victoria assured her.
“Well, I’m not!” Rachel laughed. “I’m just now getting the hang of this mommy stuff. Coming here today was a major event. It took me an hour to organize and get out of the house this morning. As it was, I almost forgot this.” She rummaged in Billy’s diaper bag and pulled out a flyer. “Here. It’s a map and an invitation to the reunion this weekend.”
Startled, Victoria took it from her. “Why would you invite me?”
“Are you kidding? You’re the guest of honor. Billy’s the newest member of the clan, and you delivered him. It’s not anything fancy. We’re having it on our land. It’s more of a picnic. Kids will be running wild, and the adults will pretty much have to fend for themselves. But you’d be welcome. And bring a date, of course.”
Victoria didn’t quite know what to say. Rachel seemed so earnest and genuine in her invitation. “I’d like to accept, but I never know with my schedule. I’ve got one patient due a few days after that. Is it okay if I just show up if I can make it?”
“Sure.” Rachel picked Billy up, smiling at the baby as if she were struck all over again by what a miracle he was. “I’ve raved to everyone about how you helped me through this, and Rob would like to say thanks too. Try to come, okay? I know two of my sisters-in-law are dying to meet you. It’d be good for business,” she promised.
Unable to resist, Victoria agreed. Once Rachel left, Victoria reached for the oversize purse she carried and fished out the journal she kept with her most of the time now. The bits and pieces of her life were beginning to weave themselves into a tapestry, giving her a feeling of security. Joshua had tried to sneak a peek inside her book the last time he was over, but she’d caught him and whisked it out of his hands, officially notifying him that this was off-limits. He wouldn’t talk about healing, and she didn’t want to share her journal. Fair was fair. Especially since some of the pages had to do with Joshua and the attraction she spent a lot of energy fighting.
The practice was growing steadily, so she no longer had the excuse of needing all her energies to build it up. Women were knocking on her door now instead of the other way around. Joshua was knocking on her door too, and she was running out of excuses. Their relationship had hit a stalemate. They were beyond friendship but not yet lovers.
Intellectually, she recognized that she was afraid to go further because she was hung up on finding a man that instinctively believed in and trusted her. Regardless of that tidy speech about giving trust to get trust, she was still waiting for Joshua to change the same way she kept waiting for Richard to change.
Maybe it was time she stopped waiting and just plunged right in.
“Explain to me again why we’re going to this shindig?” Joshua teased her as they got out of her Range Rover, which, in a fit of generosity, she had allowed him to drive for once.
“We are here,” Victoria explained, shoving her arms into a blue-jean jacket, “so I can bask in the glory of having delivered the newest member of this family.”
“Oh?” Joshua commented, and grabbed her hand to pull her back as she started toward the throng of people gathered by the river’s edge. “I thought you didn’t care about glory.”
“This is different. It’s not really my glory. It’s Rachel’s glory. I just get to share.”
“Sharing. Isn’t that where you play with her toys and she can’t complain when you break them?”
“Something like that.” Victoria smiled. She could get used to the quiet, gentle teasing of Joshua Logan.
He ran a finger down the bridge of her nose and over her lips to her chin. “It isn’t fair for you to look like this in public. The nip in the air has made your cheeks pink. Your lips are incredible, and you look about eighteen with your hair in that ponytail. I feel like I’m robbing the cradle.”
Victoria laughed and eyed him critically. He wore a flannel shirt open at the neck with a wheat-colored T-shirt beneath, loose-fitting jeans, and expensive leather sneakers. “Six years’ difference is not robbing the cradle. You don’t look old. Except for maybe that tiny bit of gray at the temples. And the worry you get around your eyes when you have to meet a crowd of people. They don’t bite you know.”
“Not when I’m around you,” Joshua told her seriously. “I’m so damn busy wanting you that I tend to ignore all the other signals.”
NINE
Now the pink in her cheeks was caused by more than the cool autumn weather. Not knowing how to answer the raw hunger in his eyes, at least not in public, Victoria looked away and led him down the hill. A half-dozen picnic tables were scattered around, and two grills were fired up, cooking hot dogs and hamburgers. Ice chests full of sodas and beer were opening and closing at an alarming rate.
Rachel saw them first, grinned widely, and waved with her whole arm. She grabbed a good-looking young man by the arm and dragged him over. “You made it! This is Rob.”
He extended his hand. “Thanks for coming. I didn’t know how much this community needed you until Rachel told me what would have happened to her if you hadn’t been there. I didn’t want her to go through that alone in a room with no one to sit with her. If I’d had any idea the baby was coming early—”
“Don’t beat yourself up,” Victoria interrupted with a laugh. “Babies come when they darn well please.”
That answer seemed to relieve him, as if he’d been waiting for her to chastise him for being out of town. Then he turned to Joshua and held out his hand again. “Hi, I’m Rob Shelby.”
After a fraction of second Joshua held out his hand to complete the handshake. “Joshua Logan.”
Victoria noted that the gesture was extremely brief despite the friendly smile that never faltered. For the first time, she realized how good Joshua was at hiding his reactions to the people around him. She also knew that he had come only because she asked him. Somehow it meant a lot to her that Joshua would put himself in what might be an uncomfortable situation simply because she had asked it of him.
“Aren’t you—” Rob began as recog
nition flickered in his eyes.
“Yeah,” Joshua answered, and got hit squarely in the back with a football before he could say another word. He staggered slightly and made a sound faintly like ooof.
Three preadolescent boys came racing toward them, bumping into each other as the first one caught a glimpse of Joshua’s face and stopped on a dime. Victoria was reminded of the Three Stooges, but she hid her smile.
Rachel coughed and said with a glint of mischief in her eyes, “These are our nephews. Larry, Moe, and Curly.”
Unable to stop herself, Victoria burst out laughing, and so did the men. The youngsters exchanged puzzled glances, not quite sure what the grown-ups found so funny. The first one spoke up. “Those aren’t really our names, mister. We’re sorry about the football. It was an accident.”
Joshua calmly picked up the ball at his feet and said, “Go long.”
It took the kids only a second to comprehend that the man wasn’t angry and to scramble out into the pasture. Joshua let them get some distance and then he drilled a pass to the one on the far left. In that split second the boys’ expressions changed from uncertainty to adoration. Obviously, here was an adult worthy of respect.
To Victoria’s surprise, a few minutes later they had Joshua involved in a lively touch football game as she alternately refereed and talked to people that Rachel introduced. Watching Joshua handle the boys so naturally brought back some old longings she thought were banished for good. The sight of Joshua tussling on the ground with kids and the atmosphere of the family reunion made her remember that she wanted more in her life than her parents had had in theirs.
She’d always hoped for the picket-fence ideal. She had wanted to watch her own loving husband and children mix it up on the lawn. She’d wanted to live in a house that echoed with life and laughter. When she divorced Richard, she’d given up on that dream and managed to forget or ignore those longings. Until she’d moved to Tennessee. Now Joshua was making her want those things again.
Finally exhausted, Joshua begged off from the game, which had grown to about ten people, and joined Victoria on the sidelines. His shirt was unbuttoned, revealing the T-shirt beneath, and his hair was a bit damp from the exertion. As he dropped to sit on the ground beside her, he said, “You didn’t tell me I should have been working out for this.”
Victoria curled her fingers to keep from reaching out and laying a hand on his chest to feel the heat she knew was there. “Who knew you would want to toss a pigskin around? Besides, I wouldn’t worry about your shape.”
“Really?” Joshua teased, fishing for a compliment.
“No, I think it was your strategy that lost the game, not your conditioning.” Victoria widened her eyes and cultivated a serious but innocent expression. “I have a few suggestions that might help next time.”
Joshua gave her an offended huff. “Next time, you get in the game and then maybe I’ll listen.”
“Next time, maybe I will. I’m pretty good at catching passes.”
“Not so you’d notice,” Joshua said dryly. “You’re much better at deflecting them.”
Victoria ignored him and changed the subject. “Have you noticed the way children respond to you?”
“Not particularly.”
“Well, they do. In fact, you seem more comfortable with the kids than the adults,” she said quietly. “Are they easier for you?”
Joshua didn’t pretend to misunderstand her. Since the meeting with his grandmother, he’d given up trying to hide anything from Victoria. “With well-adjusted kids like these … yeah, it’s easier. They don’t want anything from me except some attention. Their emotions are clean, no murky depths to suck me under and make me worry about things I have no power to change. The biggest issue they’re dealing with is whether or not to confess to breaking the front door glass.”
“Did one of them actually do that?” she asked.
“Curly.”
“Wait a minute. You don’t read minds!”
“Of course not. Curly let something slip and then made a show of asking me in confidence what my opinion was, considering I’m way-cool for an adult-type person.”
“Oh, please!” Victoria tried to give him a hard nudge with her elbow in an attempt to deflate his ego, but he scooted away before she connected. “What did you tell him?”
Joshua stood up and looked at the group of children, who were now busily making human pyramids, and said, “Way-cool types always recommend honesty as the best policy. Let’s get something to eat.”
Taking his hand, she let him pull her to her feet, but she hung back when he started toward the grills. She took the plunge she’d been thinking about for so long. “Would it hurt your way-cool image if we skipped the picnic and went back to my place for dinner? I feel like cooking all of a sudden. Something a little more substantial than hot dogs and chips.”
“Love, you can heat up anything you want. All you have to do is tell me when.”
Victoria swallowed. “You’ll probably want a shower.”
He nodded. “Probably.”
“So why don’t I drop you at your house and you can come by after that?”
“Why don’t we say good-bye to our hosts?” he asked, and wasted no time flagging down Rachel and Rob.
Joshua huddled deeper into his jacket to ward off the dropping temperatures of the early November night. Warmth was only a few feet away, but he sat in his car for a moment before going up to Victoria’s door. They’d been in and out of each other’s company for weeks. He knew her well enough to realize that this was more than an impromptu dinner invitation. This was an invitation into Victoria’s life.
He’d already invited her into his. She’d met his grandmother. She knew all his secrets. Now she was symbolically returning the favor. Joshua knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was going to make love to Victoria that night. More than anything, he wanted her to drop the walls. For the first time in his life he actually wanted a complete emotional and physical bond. He wanted to be as much a part of Victoria as she was of him.
Surrendering to the inevitable, he faced the fact that he’d gone way past lust without ever realizing it. He’d fallen in love with his new best friend and his tenant. And unless he was mistaken, Victoria had fallen in love with him.
Neither one of them had been looking for love. Neither one of them had really believed in love. Even if he had, he couldn’t have chosen a worse candidate than Victoria. She was a medical professional from a background that rewarded fame and glory. Because of her training, she should have been skeptical of his abilities; because of her parents, she should have been trying to figure out how to use him or use his connections. Instead, she accepted him without question and hadn’t once asked for a “little” favor of any kind.
Well, she had asked for an introduction to his grandmother, but she could have gotten that without him. And what she was taking from Gran was something that his grandmother desperately wanted to give—some of her wisdom, her life’s work. Gran was a big believer in tradition, in passing life’s wisdom from generation to generation.
Gran felt she’d failed with him because he’d never wanted any part of the sight until he held that first stone cup. Now he wanted to distance himself from his ability again, and she was back to being disappointed. Only this time her disappointment was laced with an urgency that hadn’t been there before.
The porch light flicked on and interrupted Joshua’s thoughts. Victoria knew he was there and was politely telling him to get inside. Climbing out of the car, he admitted to himself that the reserve and tact she displayed on the surface intrigued him as much as the passion he knew was simmering beneath the surface.
Victoria opened the door as soon as he knocked. She had one hand on the doorknob and held a ladle in the other. A dish towel was thrown over her shoulder, and she wore the tropical reef T-shirt she’d had on the first day he met her, except she didn’t have a bra on. He could see the ripe swell of her breasts as the cotton molded around them.
“Spaghetti had better be one of your favorite foods,” she said without preamble. “This recipe will feed a family of twenty.”
“I can do some damage with a fork and a spoon.”
She grinned. “Good, because I don’t chop up my spaghetti. It’s twirl or starve around my house.”
Victoria reached for Joshua’s plate. They finished dinner half an hour before, bat they hadn’t managed to get away from the table. “I guess I’d better get these dishes washed.”
“I can help,” Joshua volunteered, and pushed his chair back. “It’s one of my few domestic skills.”
“Sit!” ordered Victoria. “I don’t know how they do this in your family, but in mine the guest never washes dishes. Of course, neither does the host, but that’s beside the point.”
Joshua studied her as she turned her back and began to fill a sink with water. “Do you miss it?”
“Miss what?” asked Victoria as she slanted a glance over her shoulder.
“The life-style.”
Victoria scraped the plates as she considered the question. It wasn’t the life-style she missed so much as her parents’ approval. Carefully, Victoria slipped the dishes into the soapy water, and returned to the table to collect the salad bowls and glasses. “I miss being the perfect daughter.”
He guessed, “You did something you shouldn’t have done.”
“Yeah.”
“You should have gone home and not to Tennessee.”
“Right.” Victoria walked the few steps back to the sink and put the rest of the dishes in to soak. “My parents love me, but they aren’t quite sure how to treat me now that I’ve broken the mold. In their book, being happy doesn’t count in the perfect-daughter sweepstakes because they have never understood how I could have been unhappy in the first place. Being good at what I do doesn’t count toward being the perfect daughter either, because what I am doesn’t fit their definition of success.”
“Money, fame, and glory,” Joshua murmured under his breath, but she heard him.