by Linda Bridey
“It doesn’t surprise me, though,” Marcus said. “Ever since he was three or so, that kid has been able to weasel almost anything out of anyone. Except his mother. Wind Spirit doesn’t let him get away with anything. It’s pretty funny to watch her keep him in line.”
Seth said, “How does she do that when they can’t talk directly to each other.”
Marcus leaned over and said to Claire. “Honey, Seth really should bathe more often so he doesn’t stink and offend people.”
“Hey!” Seth objected.
Marcus grinned at Seth. “That’s how she does it.”
Zoe took all of this in, hoping to learn as much as possible about Raven’s culture. “Why can’t they talk to each other?” she asked.
Marcus glanced around and said, “I’ll tell you about that in private sometime. I don’t want to start an argument.” At the age of sixteen, Marcus had found out that he was half-Lakota and understood both cultures well.
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
Marcus said kindly, “Zoe, it’s not your fault and I’m glad you’re curious. It’s just that the two cultures have different views on some things that can’t be reconciled between the two. As my brother, Black Fox, likes to say; I walk equally well in both worlds, but that isn’t the case for everyone.”
“I see.” She leaned towards Seth and said, “If he walks in both worlds, why aren’t his pants split?”
Seth covered her ear and let out a loud laugh while Marcus shook a finger at her.
*****
Zoe smiled as Dean fussed over her. She saw what a good father he was just by the way he was treating her. It was like when her father had tucked her in when she was little.
“You remember where the outhouse is from here?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Do you think you’ll need more blankets?” he asked.
“No.”
“Ok. That fire should last for quite a while and the extra wood is right outside,” he said. “Are you sure you don’t want someone to stay with you?”
“I’m sure, Pa,” she said with a teasing smile.
Dean laughed. “Be careful or I’ll adopt you, too. We’re known to do that around here.”
“I think it’s nice to have so much family around,” Zoe said.
“Most of the time, it is,” Dean agreed. “Every so often we get on each other’s nerves, but that’s the way it is with most families. Well, anyway, I’ll let you get some rest. Goodnight, Zoe.”
“Goodnight, Dean.”
Zoe listened to him walk away and smiled as she looked around the tipi. She looked at the small bags and remembered that she wasn’t to play with them because they were Mike’s Lakota medicinal remedies and could be dangerous if you didn’t know what you were doing with them. The items in the tipi were a mixture of both cultures. There were a couple different dream catchers, a pile of medical books, playing cards, writing supplies, and what looked like cooking containers that the Lakota used.
The fire created dancing shadows on the tipi walls and Zoe tried to imagine what it would be like to live in one all the time. She liked it so far, but she’d only been in it for a little while. Thinking back to Marcus’ comments about how Raven always got his way, she wished she’d been able to see Raven when he was little. He must have been adorable, she thought.
The toasty warmth of the tipi and the sound of the crackling of the fire relaxed Zoe and though she fought to stay awake, at some point she drifted off.
*****
Raven put his horse in the paddock and ran to his tipi. As he stood taking off his coat and shirt, he smiled as he looked over at the other tipi. There was barely any light coming through the hide walls. He considered wearing just his loincloth, but then thought that that might not be a good idea. Raven didn’t want to scare Zoe. He did, however, change into buckskin pants, which were much more comfortable than his other pants.
Running over the ground silently in his bare feet, Raven quickly arrived at Dean’s tipi and ducked inside. The lighting was dim, but not for him. He easily found where Zoe lay over to his right and he smiled. All he could see of her was wavy red hair spread over the top of the sleeping pallet upon which she lay.
Crouching next to her, Raven playfully tugged on a small piece of her hair. She stirred slightly, and he laughed silently. He tugged again, and she made a sound of protest. Another tug earned him a swat in his direction, which he easily avoided. He pulled slightly harder, and she raised her head quickly, an annoyed expression on her face.
Zoe started when she first saw Raven, and then thought she was dreaming. He was bare from the waist up and wore buckskin pants and was the most virile man she’d ever seen. His smile made her heartbeat skitter a little before settling into a faster rhythm.
“Hi,” she said. “You look … nice.”
He grinned. “You like what you see, then?”
She said, “Oh, yes.”
He smiled and sat down cross-legged in front of her. “You had a good time with my family tonight?”
Zoe pulled herself into a sitting position and said, “Yeah. They are so much fun and there are so many of them.”
“I told you,” Raven responded as he took in her appearance. His eyes widened when he saw what she wore. “Where did you get that?”
Zoe looked down at the buckskin dress and said, “Maddie let me borrow it. She said that if I was going to sleep in the tipi that I should wear it to truly see what it was like.”
“You look beautiful,” Raven said as he watched her flame-colored hair spill down over the front of the dress.
“I’m glad you like it.”
He nodded. “Very much. How do you like the tipi?”
“It’s great. It’s relaxing lying in front of the fire and the blankets are very soft,” she said.
“Did you see Will today?”
“Not today,” she said.
“Why?”
“He had to work and there was a council meeting tonight,” Zoe said. “He said the council meetings sometimes run over.”
Raven snorted. “I worked two jobs and still saw you. Was Uncle Dean here?”
“Yes. Why does that matter?” Zoe wasn’t sure what he was getting at.
“Because he sits on council and if he was here, that means the meeting was over. Did Will come over to Auntie’s before you left?” Raven asked.
“No. Are you trying to make me feel bad?” Zoe asked.
Raven smiled and said, “No. I’m making you see that when a man truly wants to see a woman, he will make more of an effort. It was another reason I came to Auntie’s at lunch; I wanted to see you, if only for a few minutes.”
“You did?” Zoe said and blushed.
“I did. I wish I could have gotten you alone somewhere, so I could have stolen a kiss.”
“Me, too.”
“So you thought about kissing me?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Do you want me to kiss you now?” Raven asked.
Zoe swallowed and nodded.
“I need to tell you something first,” Raven said.
“Ok.”
“You are completely safe with me. I will never harm you and I will never steal your virtue,” Raven said.
“What does that mean? ‘Steal your virtue’?”
Raven’s eyes never left hers as he said, “Unless we are married, I will not sleep with you. That’s why I’m telling you that you have nothing to fear from me. I would never take that from you without being your husband.”
Zoe’s face burned with embarrassment, but she appreciated his honesty. “So you have been with women?”
“Yes, but none of them were virgins,” Raven said. “I have never stolen anyone’s virtue, and I will not do so now. We are taught to exercise restraint over such things.”
“Is that why you stopped last night?”
“Yes. That and it wasn’t private enough. But mainly because I would not dishonor you in that way, not unless you would understand that if that
happened, we would have to get married as soon after as possible. It sometimes happens that way, but not often. There is a ceremony for elopement, but then there must be a wedding soon after,” Raven told her. “But such a thing is not recognized by white man. Your marriage must be in a church. Our weddings are much different than that.”
Zoe said, “I see.”
Raven moved closer to her. “Zoe, I am not telling you these things to frighten you. I’m telling you so that you understand how serious this is to me. I’ve never explained this to any other woman. Just you.”
Zoe said, “Because of the choice I have to make at some point.”
“Right. You should know my thoughts about it all and why I will do or not do something,” Raven said. “Do you still want me to kiss you?”
Zoe said, “So kissing is allowed?”
Raven chuckled. “Yes.”
“Then, yes, I want you to kiss me,” Zoe said.
“You’re sure?” he asked.
“Yes.”
Raven leaned over and Zoe met him halfway, rising up on her knees. Raven encircled her waist with an arm and brought their bodies into contact at the same time his lips met hers. Passion sparked quickly between them and Raven lay her down on the sleeping pallet with him. Zoe ran her hands over the smooth skin of his shoulders and was surprised to hear him growl in pleasure. The sound was foreign and exciting to her and she wanted to hear it again.
Pressing her hand against his chest, Zoe felt his heartbeat against her palm and then trailed her fingers over his collarbone, downward over his arm. She ducked her arm under his and splayed her hand against his shoulder blade and squeezed the powerful muscles there. That growl sounded and she moaned against his mouth in answer.
Raven found that her exploration of him affected him more strongly than he had anticipated and he had to slow things down or risk losing control. Gently he pulled back from her and smiled down into her eyes.
“I can see you are going to be a challenge to me,” Raven said.
Zoe’s brow furrowed. “I am?”
“Yes. I am going to have to exercise a lot of restraint,” he said with a soft laugh.
“Is that a good thing?” she asked.
He nodded. “I like a challenge. The Lakota enjoy competition in many things. Fighting, wooing a woman, keeping control over ourselves, and fighting against pain or discomfort. It makes us stronger and we admire strength of all kinds.”
“I find all of this fascinating. Teach me to say something in Lakota,” she said. “Teach me to say your name.”
He smiled at her request. He thought it a good sign that she was curious. “Kȟaŋǧí. That’s how you would say it.”
Zoe got the pronunciation correct on the third try. “Kȟaŋǧí. Is that right?”
“Very good,” Raven said and kissed her. “If you want I’ll teach you something every day.”
Her eyes lit up. “Yes! Are you going to stay with me tonight?” She wanted him to very badly even though she knew it was wrong. Zoe was well aware that she was breaking the rules of propriety, but she couldn’t help herself.
Raven sighed. “I wish I could, but I don’t want anyone to find us. That would not be a good thing.”
Frowning, Zoe laid a hand on his strong jaw and said, “I’m going to have to make a decision soon, aren’t I?”
“I think so, but we need to talk about something else, too, before you decide,” Raven said.
“All right. What is it?”
Though he didn’t show it, Raven became anxious because what he was going to say might end things between them right at that moment. He was completely serious as he said, “Zoe, if you should choose me, you need to understand that I would court you with the intention of marrying you. However, we would have to decide where we’re going to live. I don’t know if I can live in a house and I don’t know if you would like living in a tipi.”
Zoe smiled. “That’s why I wanted to stay in the tipi tonight. I wanted to see if I like it enough to do that.”
He laughed. “You did? So you have been thinking about all of this?”
She nodded. “I know how different our cultures are and I understand that you would expect me to live as you do or at least compromise somehow.”
“You are very smart.” He kissed her. “And beautiful.” He kissed her again. “And funny.” Again he kissed her. “Why hasn’t anyone married you by now?”
Zoe looked away as she said, “Because I’m so tall and wear glasses.”
Raven frowned. “What’s wrong with you being tall or wearing glasses? I’d rather you wear them so you can see than not and walk around blind.”
“I hate them. They bother my ears after a while,” she told him.
He didn’t like the thought of her being in discomfort. “Let me see them.”
Zoe took them off and handed them to him. Raven didn’t know much about glasses, but as he looked at the ear pieces, an idea came to him. He gave them back to her and she put them back on.
“I think I can help, but I’ll need them for a little while. You’ll have to come when you have some time so I can work on them,” he told her.
“Ok.”
“I like how tall you are. You have very pretty legs,” he said as he ran a hand over one of her calves.
His palms were slightly rough from doing manual labor and the texture felt good against her skin. She moved closer to him.
“No one has ever said these kinds of things to me,” she said. “I’d never kissed anyone until I met Will, and I didn’t understand why everyone I knew enjoyed it. Not until you kissed me, anyway. I didn’t know it would be so … powerful.”
Raven nodded. “I feel it, too. You’re right; you are going to have to decide soon. I don’t know how long I can hold back from claiming you for mine if a decision is not made. I may make it for you.”
Zoe said, “I understand. I’ll make it very soon,” Zoe said.
“Good.”
She slid her hands into his thick, black hair. “You have such soft hair. I like how long it is.”
“It is not as long as it will be.”
Zoe heart the sadness in his voice and saw grief in the dark depths of his eyes. She smoothed his hair away from his face. “Why is it shorter?”
“In our culture, when someone we love dies, we cut our hair to show our grief. When the army found us last year, I lost an aunt and uncle as well as four cousins,” he told her. Pain made his chest tighten and he felt tears build behind his eyes.
“Oh, Raven. I’m so sorry.” Zoe’s heart ached for him.
“I tried so hard to keep them safe, but there were too many soldiers. Then I was shot and stabbed and I didn’t know if I would live. I do not fear death, but I wanted to keep fighting,” he said.
“Is that was this is from?” she asked as she traced a circular scar on his chest with her fingers.
“Yes. That’s where I was shot. This is where I was stabbed,” Raven said as he showed her a scar on his left side that was about three inches long.”
She touched that one, too, and shuddered at the thought of him being so badly wounded. Tears began to blur her vision and she put her arms around him and held him tightly. Touched by her sympathy, Raven embraced her and accepted the comfort she offered him.
Raising her head Zoe looked him in the eye and said, “I feel terrible about what happened to all of you and that you lost so much family. It wasn’t right of them to do that to you.”
He saw that she cried and he was filled with wonder that she cared enough to be moved to tears. “I did not mean to upset you, Zoe. I should not have spoken of it,” Raven said.
She shook her head. “No, it’s all right. I need to learn about all of you, not just the happy things, but the sad ones, too. They’re a part of you.”
He wiped away her tears and kissed her. “Don’t cry anymore.” He sighed. “I must go before dawn and someone comes out here.”
Zoe groaned and pressed closer to him. Raven laughed. “I feel
the same way, but I have to. Get some sleep,” he said.
As soon as she released him, Zoe felt the loss and hated to see him leave. She watched him stand up and let her gaze roam up over his tall frame. “Goodnight, Zoe.”
“Goodnight, Kȟaŋǧí.”
He grinned at her and then slipped out of the tipi.
Chapter Ten
Tapping his pencil on his desk, Will thought about Zoe and tried to figure out what he was going to do about her. He was supposed to take her to the Watering Hole that night. Tucker had told him that she had gone to the bar on Tuesday night after he’d taken her to Pricilla’s house. Sadie had said that it had been a spur of the moment thing and that Raven had taken her.
Will thought that was nice of him. He also was happy about Zoe being hired to play banjo with Joe and the gang. It was something she’d enjoy and Joe was a good boss from anything he’d ever heard. Will decided to go see Zoe on lunch time and let her know that he still planned on taking her. If there was still no real attraction between them after tonight, Will knew he was going to have to talk to her about it. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he also wasn’t going to be dishonest with her.
At noon, he rode over to Pricilla’s and found her sitting on the porch swing.
“Hi,” he said smiling. “Why are you sitting out here in the cold?”
“Hi, yourself,” she said. She was happy to see Will, but it wasn’t the same kind of happiness she felt when she saw Raven. “It’s not that cold. I like looking around at the town.”
“Oh. Ok. Did you like your night in the tipi out at Dean’s?”
“How did you know?” she asked in surprise.
“Tucker told me that Sadie told him you were gonna stay in it,” Will said as he sat down beside her.
She smiled and Will thought once again that she was very pretty. Her beauty just didn’t move him the way it should have.
“It was really fun. Dean was like a mother hen making sure I had everything I needed,” she said. She thought about the way Raven had held her and kissed her and she felt a moment of guilt. Then she thought about what Raven had said about a man who really wanted a woman making an effort to see her and the guilt fled. “He built me a fire and made sure I had blankets and knew where the outhouse was. Before that we played poker in their cookhouse. It was a lot of fun.”