by Adams Media
Say you’re sitting in your seat on a crowded bus or train and you notice an elderly person or a pregnant woman standing, or a small child standing and holding onto his parent’s leg. Don’t just sit there—get up and offer your seat to the person in need! Think of the good karma you’ll be generating. Seniors may not be stable on their feet, young kids can’t always reach rails and straps to steady themselves, and pregnant woman are often tired due to, you know, growing another human being. Give up your seat and give these people the safety of sitting. You’ll feel good knowing that you showed an act of kindness to another—and you are a better person for having done it.
Create a Vision Board
A sheet of poster paper or a foam board can host images, inspirational words, goals, and dates for accomplishing your goals as well as ideas of new directions to take your dreams. Maybe you want to find a way to help your school establish a theatrical group or an arts program. Perhaps you are an artist yourself and can help make masks, costumes, stage sets, etc. Cut out pictures of representative images from magazines and paste them on your vision board. Do you know other artists who could help you launch such a program? Write their names on your board and contact them. You’ll soon learn that a dream doesn’t have to be a solo dream—it can come about through a team working together on a shared vision.
Find Pleasure on Bad Days
In spite of any negative circumstances you may be dealing with, find little moments throughout the day to notice the things that give you pleasure. Take time to appreciate seeing the neighbor’s yellow roses that have just burst into bloom, the taste of a perfectly ripe and sweet apple, the sound of your favorite music, the painting you bought on your vacation that’s now hanging in your room, the feel of your favorite shoes, the warmth of your partner’s hand on yours. Savor the gifts of sight, sense, taste, touch, and smell—they’re still reacting to your surroundings even as you deal with your lousy day. Take comfort in simply noticing the blessings in the small things and in your short moments of happiness throughout the day.
Be Happier at Work
Think of three things you could do to make yourself happier on the job. Would listening to your favorite music lift your spirits? Would seeing pictures of your family members taped to the bottom of your computer screen inspire you to be happy? Would checking your email at noon instead of when you first arrive at work keep your mood elevated throughout the morning? Find ways to be happy while at work, and your creativity and productivity are likely to rise along with your mood.
Make a Scrapbook
Are you the keeper of family photos? Why not create a scrapbook to trace your family’s lineage and to document births, deaths, marriages, and other important events? During this process, you can explore your ancestry or discover your vital health history too. A scrapbook can contain pages with old letters, documents, deeds, and other keepsake documents. You’ll not only have hours of fun working on your book and sharing it with relatives during celebrations and holidays, you’ll feel a sense of pride and joy from knowing the details of your family’s lineage.
Pass Out Fortune Cookies
Host a dinner party for family, relatives, friends, business associates, or members of your community. Serve Chinese food; then, before passing out the fortune cookies, make sure you have inserted little slips of paper containing a compliment or a happiness quote into each cookie. You want to make everyone feel uplifted, happy, and full of good cheer! You can accomplish that by filling their tummies with great food and their minds with pearls of joy.
Make Some “Me Time”
Plan a little time off just to do some inner reflection. The amount of time is not as important as getting the respite you need. Make your time away a priority! It’s a chance for you to clear your head, gather your energy, and get perspective. Retreat to someplace peaceful where you can relax and have a break from the responsibilities of work and family. Don’t know of any great retreat places? Take your favorite book and head to a beach. Find a shady bank along the edge of a lake, creek, river, or a pond—someplace where earth and water meet. Sink into your beach chair, tune into the sounds of nature, open your book, and lose yourself in a story. Or just sit back, close your eyes, and let your mind wander. You don’t have to do anything while on your retreat—just make space for tranquility and joy to fill you.
Build a Tree House
If you’ve got a tree in your yard strong enough to support a tree house, get the children in your family involved in helping you create a design for a treehouse, shop for the wood and nails (and all the other construction materials you’ll need), and build it. Not only will the children love you for building something that will surely give them many hours of fun memories, but you’ll be creating a special space where you can share your inner child with the children in your life!
Text Some Happiness
When you find a happiness quote you love, add it to your email signature so that it will be read by everyone you correspond with throughout your day. Also, when you happen upon a funny meme, hilarious story, joke, or quote, text them to someone you know who needs a boost. If the recipient is having a bad day, your dose of optimism, humor, and happiness may be just what that person needs to start giggling and get back into a joyful groove.
Stop Negative Thoughts
Some of us can get so good at negative or obsessive thinking that we do it without even being consciously aware that we’re doing it. You may think I know I’ll make a poor impression at this job interview! the second you set up the interview. This type of negative thinking can happen faster than you can manufacture happy thoughts to counter them. The good news is that you can learn to interrupt these negative thoughts and then deal more realistically with them. One tactic is to interrupt negative thoughts by simply saying “Stop!” to yourself. Then switch to a positive thought before any other troubling thoughts emerge. A new, more optimistic thought—such as I will be relaxed, positive, and learn a lot from my interview!—will allow you to stop your negative thinking. This is a simple but highly effective technique.
Do Something Fun
This may seem simplistic, but many, many people go through their days without doing anything fun. Studies have clearly shown that doing something breaks obsessive thoughts. Doing something fun will get you off the beaten track so that you can put things into perspective and get rid of negative feelings or thoughts that have been weighing you down. Not to mention the obvious: it’s fun! So whether your fun is skydiving, reading a great novel, swimming, playing with kids, or having a little romantic encounter with your significant other, the lesson here is to stop wishing or thinking about it—get out there and do it.
Buy Flowers
Researchers at Harvard University have found that keeping fresh flowers in your living or working space helps keep anxiety and negative moods at bay. People in the study who were around fresh flowers were also more compassionate toward others and more enthusiastic at work, plus they felt a boost of energy. So don’t wait for a birthday or Valentine’s Day to buy some flowers for yourself or your sweetie! Buy some today.
Go Outside
Sunlight has been proven to help battle depression and negative thoughts and help people feel better. The human body produces vitamin D when exposed to the sun’s rays, and when we have vitamin D deficiency, we tend to feel tired, anxious, and depressed. So step into the sunshine for ten to twenty minutes for a boost of happiness! If you can’t get outside, try using a light therapy lamp to simulate the same feelings.
Sniff Citrus
The scent of oranges, lemons, grapefruits, and other citrus fruits eases stress and creates positive chemical reactions in your brain. In addition to enjoying the scent of fresh fruit, you can also apply a few drops of diluted citrus essential oil to your pressure points or use diluted citrus oil in a soothing bath. You can also have a nice glass of freshly squeezed orange juice and get the added benefits of drinking vitamin C.
Put Down Your Phone
Researchers at
Kent State University conducted a study of five hundred students and found that frequent smartphone use was associated with lower grades, higher anxiety, and reduced happiness. People who spend a lot of time on their devices are more vulnerable to social comparisons, and that leaves them feeling a sense of emptiness. The fear of “missing out” and feeling inadequate makes it difficult for people to stay present and happy in their own lives. So, a caution: use your smartphone in moderation.
Spend Money on Others
Spending money on other people can boost happiness more than spending money on yourself. According to a Harvard University study, people who bought things for others felt significantly happier immediately after the purchase and upon recollection of the purchase than people who used the money to buy something for themselves. And the good feelings you get from spending on others often lead to doing the same thing in the future. See? Philanthropy grows happiness!
Try New Positions
Sex is a surefire way to get happy any day of the week, but if you really want to kick up the happiness factor, try some new sexual positions. After all, having sex the same way every time can make even sex boring! Experiment imaginatively before, during, and after sex. You can get in plenty of stretches and a decent cardio workout as well, not to mention get all of those pleasurable endorphins flowing. If you can’t dream up any new ways to turn on, tantalize, or titillate your partner, try reading the Kama Sutra or visit your local bookstore or Amazon.com for books that can provide some insight. Bring the heat back into your relationship with some imaginative sex.
Exercise
Exercise releases endorphins throughout your body, creating feelings of happiness. While many people find it hard to motivate themselves to exercise, the mood boost you get after exercising is worth the effort. Researchers from Penn State found in a recent study that people who were more physically active had more pleasant-activated feelings than people who did not exercise. Additionally, exercise energizes you, helps you feel less stressed out, boosts your confidence, and can even fight insomnia. Any physical activity that gets you to break a sweat helps you build happiness—even a brisk walk works! So get that blood pumping and get happy.
Eat Turmeric
From golden milk to spiced rice, turmeric has made big news headlines for its anti-inflammatory properties. But the active compound in turmeric—curcumin—also has antidepressant qualities. It can cause an increase in serotonin and dopamine (the “feel-good” chemicals) in your brain and help boost your mood. And it’s not just straight turmeric that gives you this mood boost but also dishes that contain the spice, like curries.
Host a Dinner Party
Hosting a party can be stressful, but it can also be a whole lot of fun, especially when the only thing on the agenda is good food. Sharing food is about more than just eating and drinking—you’re sharing meaningful and pleasurable moments with great friends. If everyone has fun, make it into a regular thing, rotating the location to each member’s home. Planning and preparing a gourmet meal is not necessarily as difficult as you might think. All you really need is an idea of what to make, some fresh, wholesome ingredients, and a few basic pantry staples.
Hit the Snooze Button
Some mornings, there is no greater pleasure than being able to hit the snooze button and go back to sleep for ten more luxurious minutes. Set your alarm clock for ten minutes earlier than you really have to get out of bed; then, when the alarm goes off, you’ll have the joy of knowing you can go back to sleep and ignore it. Sometimes that small triumph over the alarm clock can make the rest of your morning seem better.
Assume the Best in Others
Happy, optimistic people give others the benefit of the doubt and expect to like other people (unless given a reason not to). Try adopting that mindset: when you meet someone new, choose to see that person as a potential friend whose company you might enjoy. Try this idea with your existing relationships too! Don’t assume a friend you haven’t seen in a while doesn’t care about you—instead, give that person the benefit of the doubt and assume that your friend’s absence has nothing to do with you.
Live Close to Work
Commuting is a stress-inducing, anxiety-filled activity that can wear down even the most patient of people. In a study of over one thousand employed Americans, the times of the day when they felt the worst was during their commute to and from work. In fact, people felt happier while at work and even while doing housework at home than they did when commuting. Couples with one partner commuting more than forty-five minutes have a 40 percent higher divorce rate. If you have a choice about where you live with respect to your job location, do yourself a favor and make your commute a reasonable distance.
Reminisce
The happiness that can come from reminiscing about happy memories is as real as the feelings that happened during the actual event. In fact, people who frequently reminisce about positive life events are the most likely to be happy. So take photos, make scrapbooks, bring home souvenirs, call an old friend, watch your favorite movies . . . do whatever you need to do to relive those positive memories.
Buy Small Things
Instead of buying the latest smartphone, the coolest new car, or the best new laptop, buy several small things: fancy chocolates, a few nice candles, some music for your phone. It will actually make you happier to indulge in frequent small pleasures than to buy more extravagant (and expensive) delights. After all, you don’t get twice as much happiness from buying a car that is twice as expensive as another model! Use some of that money to pay for a weekend away with your partner. You’ll get far more satisfaction from your getaway weekend than you would from the luxury car.
Sit Up Straight
Everyone knows that sitting up straight and not slouching is good for your body. In fact, poor posture causes extra wear and tear on joints and ligaments, increases the likelihood of accidents, makes your lungs less efficient, and can lead to tension headaches and back pain. However, more and more people are losing their proper posture due to their devices. The condition known as “tech neck,” derived from staring down at a computer screen or phone, is becoming a real problem. In addition, slouching doesn’t just make you look bad, it can make your body feel bad too. When you slouch in a chair, your brain actually thinks you are tired or unsure of yourself. Whereas sitting straight can boost your confidence, give you more energy, and make you more productive. So sit up straight! You’ll feel better, look better, and have more confidence.
Stop Complaining
Seeing as the brain has a tendency to focus on the negative, complaining may in fact be a natural human reaction. Still, that doesn’t mean complaining is the best reaction. Dwelling on how much something sucks is not good for your body or your mood. Besides, when has complaining ever gotten you anywhere? All it does is reinforce negativity. So rather than complaining about something, try to focus on something else, something positive. You’ll be happier.
Don’t Settle
It’s tough to leave your comfort zone, which is why so many of us reach a place of comfort in our jobs or lives and then stop: we stop learning, we stop growing, we stop changing. But stagnation results in less happiness! Of course, just changing for the sake of change won’t lead to happiness, either. Getting a new job will be exciting at first, for example, but as soon as the novelty wears off, you’ll be back in your same rut. Instead of letting that happen, try to continue making improvements in your life. Move well past your comfort zone if you have to—don’t settle for less.
Don’t Be a Pushover
Being a pushover means that you tend to do things you don’t want to because you’d rather avoid confrontation. You don’t stand up for your opinions or ideas and you are easily taken advantage of. However, being a pushover doesn’t make you weak, it just means you lack the tools of defense. First learn how to express how you feel. If something doesn’t feel right to you or bothers you, speak up about it. Next learn how to say no if you feel you don’t have the time to do someth
ing. Then pick your battles and fight constructively— meaning you should be direct and honest but calm. Remember you shouldn’t be passive in your life: communicate your preferences and ask for what you want. You don’t have to steamroll over other people to do that, but do be assertive and set boundaries for yourself that you don’t want others to break. You’ll find that assertiveness increases self-esteem, makes you feel like your needs are being better met, and can improve your relationships.
Drink Coffee
Coffee is the nectar of the gods for many of us, and for good reason—the caffeine in coffee gives us energy, fights off depression, and boosts our mood. A recent study showed that just the smell of coffee can make you feel less stressed. In addition, coffee provides you with easily absorbable antioxidants, is good for your liver, can make you feel happier, can fight your risk of getting skin cancer (if you’re a woman), can reduce your risk of type 2 diabetes, and can keep your brain healthier for longer than a non-coffee drinker. The caveat with caffeine, though, is that the more you consume, the less you reap its benefits. So to really get happy from your coffee, enjoy it in moderation.