“Have you heard from him yet?” I asked, straightening and ignoring the super-caffeinated resident for a moment.
“Yes, he just called. The team’s flight is delayed due to the storm that hit out east. So far there’s no ETA for him getting here.”
Good thing he hadn’t announced that while I was having a contraction. I might have kneed him in the nuts—not that the news was Trent’s fault.
I completely blamed Mother Nature.
Note to self: no Mother’s Day card for her this year.
Did Josh ever say “I love you” again after I thought I’d imagined him possibly saying it on Christmas Eve? The answer was no—so I just wrote it off as a wonderful dream.
Had I said those three little words yet? No—I didn’t want to put him on the spot if he wasn’t there. Why did falling in love have to be so complicated? There really should be a book on how to let a guy know you’re in love with him without freaking him out. Or at least a chapter in What To Expect.
“Alrighty,” the resident said, suddenly sounding a little impatient. Guess it was time for her coffee break, so she could fill up on her annoying perkiness. “I need to check your cervix again.”
Truth? Trent should have been a sprinter instead of a mutual fund portfolio manager. I’d never seen a man vacate a room that fast before.
Chuckling at his hasty retreat, I removed my maternity yoga pants and underwear and climbed onto the bed. Kelsey studied the wall behind my head while the resident stuck her fingers up my woo ha ha.
“You’re four centimeters.”
Seriously? I’d always been quick at everything—especially academics. So why did this have to be the first time a snail progressed faster than me?
Maybe this is for the best, so Josh can be here for the birth of his son, the annoying voice in my head said at the same time another contraction hit. Hard.
I bitch slapped the voice. Was it not experiencing the same contractions I was? Did it really believe I wanted to wait until after Josh arrived before I gave birth to Noah?
Hell, that could be in twelve hours!
Five hours later, I was ready to rip my belly open and remove Noah myself. It was official. I was never having sex again.
Ever.
“Remember to breathe, Holly,” Kelsey said, wiping a damp cloth across my forehead.
“I am breathing,” I whimpered.
Looking for Trent? He was in the waiting room. Kelsey had tried sending him home hours ago, but he had refused to budge. But it had more to do with his girlfriend being here than it had to do with me being in labor.
Kelsey’s phone dinged from her purse. She removed it and read the screen. “Josh wants to know if he can talk to you.”
“He texted you?”
“No, he texted Trent, and Trent relayed the question to me.”
I slid a glance at the nurse who had come into the room to see how I was doing. At the last check, I was seven centimeters…and extremely cranky at that.
I was beginning to think the NHL season would be over before Noah came out.
“He’s going nuts not being here for you.”
“Okay,” I whispered, too tired to speak louder than that.
“Where’s your phone?”
“In my bag. Side pocket.”
She retrieved my phone and handed it to me, then sent a text on her phone. Less than a minute later my phone rang.
I accepted the call. “G’day,” I said, willing the next contraction to stay away long enough for me to talk to Josh.
“How are you holding up?” he asked—and his deep, sinful voice soothed me to my bones. I missed that voice.
I missed him.
You know what I didn’t miss? The contractions.
Another one slammed through my belly, and I did my best to breathe through it while Kelsey removed the phone from my hand. Possibly to prevent me from crushing it single-handedly.
Hee hee.
Whoo whoo.
Hee hee.
Whoo whoo.
Once the contraction had passed, I released a slow cleansing breath and took the phone back from Kelsey.
“Sorry,” I said. “I had a contraction.”
“You don’t need to apologize. I’m the one who’s sorry. I should be there with you instead of stuck at the airport in Pittsburgh.”
“That’s not your fault. We both knew the odds of you being away when I went into labor were high.” It just would have been lower if Noah had been a little more patient and waited until closer to his due date.
But it was too late to tell him that now.
“Our flight’s been approved to leave in the next hour.”
And then he had a five-hour flight. The airport was at least an hour away—which meant roughly seven more hours before I would see him.
But I couldn’t focus on that. I needed to focus on the here and now. “Remember how you were going to sing to me while I was in labor?” I asked, sounding more like a little girl than a grown woman.
“Yes.”
“Can you still do that, at least until you have to board your flight?”
Instead of answering, he sang a soothing jazz song, and I relaxed a little more. His singing had that effect on me.
At least it did until another contraction hit.
Hee hee.
Whoo whoo.
Kelsey took the phone from me again, but turned up the volume so I could focus on Josh’s singing.
Hee hee.
Whoo whoo.
Eventually Josh had to leave to catch his flight. “I’ll be there soon, babe. I—” He said something else, but I missed it as another contraction ripped through me.
Bloody. Hell.
“Okay, Holly,” Dr. Perky said, having refilled on caffeine an hour ago. “I need you to give me another big push.”
Drenched with sweat, I flopped back onto the bed. Giving birth was definitely not a glamorous activity. I was positive Josh was less sweaty after a hockey game.
“I can’t,” I whispered. That was the extent of my energy.
“C’mon, sweetheart,” the grandmotherly nurse said from somewhere near where the resident was sitting, “you’re almost there.”
“You can do it,” Kelsey said, the only person who had been able to keep me relatively sane during the past few hours. After what she had witnessed, I wouldn’t be surprised if she changed her mind about having babies.
Maybe she and Trent would adopt a puppy instead.
Another contraction hit. With all the strength I had left—and some I had borrowed from who knows where—I pushed hard. People in the parking lot several floors down no doubt heard my inhuman scream. Lucky them.
Ever heard of “the ring of fire”? No, it wasn’t from Lord of The Rings—although it might as well have been. It was the burning sensation you experienced when the baby’s head pushed through an opening much much smaller than it. Except the term ring of fire didn’t even begin to describe the insurmountable pain.
It was misleading—false advertising.
And if you hadn’t already done so by now, this was the defining moment when you decided to never, ever, have sex again.
I didn’t even have a chance to recover from the contraction. Another one hit with the same intensity as before. The cheerleaders in the room didn’t even have to tell me to push. I couldn’t have not pushed even if I had tried.
“Okay, Holly, you can do it,” someone said. The resident? My eyes were squeezed shut. “One more big push and he’s out.”
I did as I was told—with another round of noises that might’ve caused Noah to have second thoughts about being born.
“And here he is,” the resident said.
Then a moment later.
“Or rather, here she is.”
Huh?
I opened my eyes. “She? What do you mean ‘she’?”
The resident held up what was definitely a girl.
“But the ultrasound technician said I was having a boy.” But really,
what did I expect the resident to do? Wave her magic wand and turn the baby into a boy?
“Ultrasound isn’t a hundred percent accurate,” she explained.
Oh, sure. Now they tell me that.
The nurse placed my crying baby on me so we were chest-to-chest. And just like magic, my beautiful newborn daughter instantly quieted.
“She’s gorgeous,” Kelsey exclaimed and kissed my sweaty forehead. “If you’re okay for a moment, I’ll go tell Trent.”
“Trent’s still here?” I said weakly.
She nodded and smiled. “Of course he is.”
Despite feeling like roadkill that had been driven over several times, I smiled at her. “Thanks for being here for me, Kelsey. I don’t know what I would have done without you. But why don’t you take Trent home before the poor man collapses from exhaustion?”
She chuckled. “Right—because he’s been working hard for the past few hours, pushing out a baby. But you’re right. I should probably get the big baby home. You good if we come back later today to visit?”
“Absolutely.”
Baby girl and I were eventually wheeled into a private room. She was bundled in a blue receiving blanket covered with puppies, wearing a little pink hat Kelsey had picked up in the gift shop before leaving the hospital. The excitement of being born must have been too much. My daughter was fast asleep in the clear bassinet.
As I studied her perfect little face, I fell in love with her more than I ever believed possible.
“It will be okay, little one,” I said. “No matter what happens with your daddy, I’ll always be there for you. I’ll be the best mummy any girl could hope for.”
I’d be the mother I never really had—until recently.
Even if in the end I had to do it alone.
27
Josh
“You may now use your cellular phones,” the stewardess announced as we taxied toward the terminal shortly after our flight had touched down in San Francisco.
“Any word yet?” Travis asked as I checked my texts.
Trent had sent one three hours ago. Congratulations, Daddy! Mother and daughter are doing fine.
I shut my eyes, positive I’d misread the message. I was tired. Clearly my brain wasn’t working at full capacity.
“Everyone,” Travis called out. “Josh’s girlfriend had a girl!”
Cheers and congratulations broke out from my teammates, coaching staff, and everyone else involved with the team.
Guess that made it official—I had a daughter.
The unexpected pride? If I hadn’t been sitting, it would’ve knocked me on my ass. Holly and I had been so focused on a son that didn’t exist, I hadn’t even considered how I would feel if we had a daughter.
“And because of that,” Travis added, “drinks tonight are on him…even if he won’t be there.”
That got snickers from my teammates.
“What were you thinking, man?” Mark asked, from across the aisle—the only HDF member with a boy. “Now we’ll have to watch more girlie kiddy shows.”
“Are you saying you’re not comfortable enough with your masculinity to survive?” I laughed and he flipped me the bird.
I had a billion questions I wanted to ask Trent, but given the text had been sent during the night, it meant he was probably at home, sleeping. So I held back on my Q&A and caught a cab to the hospital.
Where was my car?
Safe in my apartment garage. Travis had picked me up on the way to the arena when we flew out. Since it had been a long night for the team after being stuck for so long in Pittsburgh, I told him I’d just grab a cab.
“Don’t you play hockey for the Rock?” the cabbie asked as we sped toward the hospital.
“Yep.” I was too tired and too excited to deal with a fan, so I stared out the window, hoping he’d get the hint.
He didn’t.
“Great game last night.”
“Thanks.”
“My son isn’t going to believe that I’m driving Josh Hoffer. He’s a huge fan. He’s ten years old and hopes to play for the NHL one day.”
Him and thousands of other boys.
He went on and on about his son and asked tons of questions about playing for the NHL. Were you surprised I listened to him? Don’t be. Why? Because this was the kind of man I would’ve loved to have as my father when I’d been his kid’s age.
His son wasn’t just fulfilling the cabbie’s life-long dream of playing in the NHL. The dream was completely his son’s.
You had to respect a man like that.
At the hospital, I stepped off the elevator on the maternity floor—not bothering to wait until the door was fully open—and walked toward the nurse’s desk. A few people in the waiting room gave me a double glance—possibly wondering why I was wearing a suit. I ignored them and asked at the desk for Holly’s room.
Did you see that? The nurse’s expression? The wide eyes? The “O” shaped mouth?
Once she’d recovered enough to make a coherent sentence, she replied, “Are you a friend?”
“I’m her boyfriend.”
Rule #1 when it comes to social media and being an NHL player? Always be the first to post the information—that way you have a little more control over the situation.
The team’s publicist had mentioned that to me but I had brushed it off.
Now who felt like the dumbass?
The nurse told me which room Holly and my daughter were in, and I quietly slipped inside, doing my best not to wake them. Holly looked so peaceful, it was hard to believe she had given birth a few hours ago.
Without me.
I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me that I hadn’t been here for her. She didn’t blame me, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling I had failed her and our daughter.
After placing my luggage by the wall, I peered into the clear plastic bassinet by Holly’s bed. And smiled.
Looked like all the studying I had done on the Disney princesses would come in handy after all.
Go ahead and quiz me—I took my studies very seriously.
And gained the reputation in HDF of being unbeatable.
The prize?
Beer and chicken wings at Sean’s favorite sports bar. The sauce was the best freaking hot sauce on the planet.
The little princess in the bassinet stirred. I gently scooped her up, supporting her neck, and cradled her against me. Then I walked to the wooden rocking chair and sat.
She peered up at me and gave a little yawn…and my heart melted right there.
“Hi, I’m your daddy,” I said softly. “I’m the one who was singing to you while you were in Mommy’s belly. I’m so happy to finally meet you, little one. I’m the man who’s going to protect you and your mommy. And I’ll teach you how to keep all the dumbasses in line.” I cringed. “Oops. I wasn’t supposed to say that word. How ’bout we don’t tell Mommy?” I smiled down at the little bundle.
“How about Mummy forgets she heard you say it—just this once?” my favorite Aussie said and I looked up.
28
Holly
Nothing is sexier and more breathtaking than the sight of a baby in the arms of a big, rugged hockey player.
Don’t believe me? Take a look.
Josh was sitting on the wooden rocking chair, cradling our daughter—and I knew without a doubt that he had already fallen unequivocally in love with her.
But how could he not?
“I see you’ve already met your daughter,” I said softly.
He smiled at me in the way that always turned me heated. Even after twelve hours of labor and pushing out a seven-pound baby, he still had that power over me.
“I have. She’s beautiful, just like her mother.”
And apparently south of the equator wasn’t the only place to heat up. My face got pretty hot too. “Thanks.”
“Any idea what we’re going to call her?” he asked. “I’m guessing Noah is no longer on the table.”
Definitely not�
��even though I really did love the name.
“I thought maybe we could name her after my grandmother. Lily.”
He studied his daughter for a moment. “She looks like a Lily. All right, Lily it is. If it’s okay with you, I’d like her middle name to be Grace—after my grandmother.”
Lily Grace. “It’s perfect.”
“I was thinking,” he said, smiling at Lily in a way that clearly suggested she already had him wrapped around her finger, “of maybe taking a picture of her and me together. Then the team can release it. People are going to find out I’m now a father”—he nodded at the door—“and it’s not like I’m trying to hide that I have a child.”
“That’s a great idea.” Plus, then I’d have a copy to look at whenever Josh wasn’t around.
“I was also thinking”—he glanced back up at me—“that maybe we could move in together. Probably your apartment since she already has her room there.”
Did you hear that? No? That was because I’d stopped breathing. I wasn’t too surprised that he wanted to go public about the birth of his daughter. But had I even for a second thought he would suggest we live together as a family?
Was Australia’s national animal the polar bear?
“I still have my apartment, but I can sublet it until my lease ends,” he said. “Or I can stay where I am now if you’d prefer.”
I think I might have blinked. I couldn’t be sure. My mind was still trying to digest what he had just said.
And then it hit me. Well, more like what he had meant by the second part hit me. Did he really think that I didn’t want him to live with me and Lily?
I grinned. “I would love it if you moved in with us.”
Like a family.
Which we now were.
He smiled at me, clearly relieved. Then he returned to smiling broadly at Lily. “And your Daddy is going to sell his Nissan GT-R and buy a nice car-seat friendly vehicle. Then I can take you and your mommy for rides.”
His words warmed me up inside. “You’re really going to sell it? But you love that car.”
He looked up at me. “I do, but what’s the point of it if I can’t take Lily for rides?” He went back to smiling at his daughter.
I grabbed my cell phone from the nightstand and shuffled over to join them. The picture I took of father and daughter was nothing like what Kelsey would have taken—but I thought it looked utterly adorable.
Decidedly With Baby (By the Bay Book 2) Page 18