“Yeah, but if I don’t have that pull to do black magic, wouldn’t I be a better candidate to perform it? I don’t want anything to pull you back to that. I’ve finally allowed myself to think of a future with us as one, and if something went wrong...,” my voice trailed off.
“Triss,” his voice softening, “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that I’m done with that part of my life. I knew I’d never have a chance with you if I maintained those traditions. You think now that I finally have a chance to be with you I’d throw it away by hopping the fence?”
I shook my head. I knew he was speaking the truth or what he thought was the truth, but he’d even mentioned the pull being hard for many to leave. What if he’s only lying to himself? Knowing more about my father’s background puts things in perspective.
“Let’s just forget about this. I don’t think either of us will be satisfied with one another’s ideas on this. I know I feel strongly about not wanting you to do it,” I replied.
“I can’t lose you, Triss. I’ve at least experienced that side of things and managed to fight my way back. I couldn’t live with myself if you attempted this spell and never made it back to the Triss I love,” he whispered, circling my palm with his finger. “It can be enticing.”
“I would never want to practice black magic. It wouldn’t be tempting to me at all,” I replied emphatically, looking into his blue eyes and hoping he understood I’d never want to experience that side of sorcery, unlike him.
His body recoiled a little at the unintended jab I slung at him. I felt horrible for implying that he would be so easily swayed, but the thought of losing him to that side was beyond frightening. I wouldn’t take that chance. His blue eyes were about ten shades too dark, and I knew I hurt him in a way I never intended.
“If it’s not tempting then why are you discussing it?” he asked.
He made a point that I couldn’t argue with any longer and wasn’t even going to try.
I leaned my head against his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around me. I felt him sigh and wondered what I could do to make things go back to the way they were before we fell upon this spell. I snuggled in a little more, hoping for a tighter hold while I thought about what would make him forget my harshness. He kissed my hair and gathered it to the side of my neck, giving his lips complete access to my skin. Apparently, he already came up with something to comfort us both.
“This might make you feel better,” he whispered, gliding his lips along my neck, sending chills through my body.
“Oh, Logan,” I whispered. “You are certainly distraction enough,” I giggled.
“Hmm,” he murmured, slowly kissing me, “as are you.”
I moved away from him, turning to look into his eyes, which were full of desire, the same desire I was feeling.
“What are you doing?” he asked coyly.
“You’ll see soon enough,” I teased him.
Taking the black hairband from my wrist, I secured my hair in a ponytail. His eyes were hungrily examining my every move, and I enjoyed it. Sitting back on my knees, I smiled at him, tracing my finger gradually along his hand up to his arm.
“You seem like you might be getting chilled, Logan,” I smirked. “Let me help.”
“Please do,” his lip pulled into a smile, melting my heart.
But that smile did something more deep inside of me. It created a stir of bravery, allowing me to finally embrace my emotions that involved Logan. I could no longer dismiss the flurry of love and desire I had for him.
Taking him completely by surprise, I climbed on top of him, dropping my lips down to his as he embraced me fully. The tree he was sitting up against was the only brace we had, and it was barely enough. With every kiss returned, my soul became stronger as I left the Anima Sola behind. I would no longer hold back. I would give him everything I had as he had done for me.
I wrapped my hand around his neck, unable to stop myself. The more he gave, the more I took, trying with every touch of his lips to break down the walls I had been so vigilant at constructing. The warmth that we were sharing brought me to another world, another time, and I didn’t even notice the raindrops that started to fall until his lips left mine.
“Think we should go in?” His eyes were sparkling with a new liveliness that I wanted to share in.
I shook my head, and I curled in his lap, his hands slowly tracing down my spine, as I thought about everything this meant. The summer rain felt wonderful running between our two bodies, as I rested my head on his shoulder. I felt the dampness from his shirt on my cheek, and I was thankful that the wetness wasn’t caused by tears, only Mother Nature.
“I think I could stay in the rain all day long with you, baby,” he whispered, sending electricity through me, tightening all the muscles in my body.
Baby! He called me baby, and the way it rolled off his tongue was perfection. I nuzzled in even tighter, taking a deep breath in and letting myself become intoxicated by everything Logan.
I wouldn’t let him do that spell. I would never risk losing this now that I’d finally let myself have it. We would just have to find my mom’s location another way. We were getting close enough without resorting to black magic.
***
“Beeeaatrissss,” a woman’s voice whispered. “Beeeaatrissss.”
Panicking, I turned over slowly and only saw the sheer green curtains blowing in the wind. I had left the window open. There was no streetlamp to bounce the gentle glow of the city inside like I was accustomed to, so I was unable to see anything. It was pitch black, with only the slight glow of the moon, and I was hearing things. Not a good combination, but not that surprising lately.
“Logan, is that you?” I snapped. It had to be Logan teasing me. But how could he get his voice to sound like that?
“Leave now,” the voice hissed.
I searched around the tiny bedroom still seeing no one. My heart was racing, and I couldn’t steady my breath. The thought of getting up from the safety of my bed was terrifying, but it had to be done. I needed to close that window. That’s where the voice had to be coming from. I scooted myself slowly down the mattress, dragging the sheet with me. I kept my back to the wall, not wanting to allow for any person or thing to slip by me. I wanted to fool myself into thinking I could see everything in this blackness and make sure there was no one lurking, but it wasn’t true. I could see nothing.
Now the only noise that was swirling through the room was the wind. Maybe, I imagined the other. I had to have imagined the other.
Jumping off my bed, I ran to the window, slammed it shut, and ran back to the safety and warmth of my comforter. There! No more noises, but then a prickle began crawling up my arms leaving a trail of goose bumps. My mouth was completely parched. The fear was not subsiding; it was worsening.
With the absence of the breeze, the welcomed silence was back. I wanted to hear some hint that Logan was in the other bedroom whether it was breathing or a rustle of the covers, anything to make me feel not so alone, but his room was silent.
“I’m warning you to get out now, Beatrice,” the woman’s voice went from a whisper to a squeal.
My heart was about to explode. It was back. I wanted to run screaming to Logan’s room, but I couldn’t move. I was paralyzed with fear, worried that any movement would be the wrong one, especially since I didn’t understand where this voice was coming from. My eyes darted from one blank image to the next. I wasn’t going anywhere.
Sitting on my bed, I wrapped my sheet around me tighter, with my fingers trembling and my eyes as wide as they would go waiting for something to appear. The only thing I could hear was my breathing for several seconds, until scratching began in the direction of my closet. The scratching turned to clawing, and it was getting faster and louder, but my closet doors weren’t moving at all. Was this thing under my floor? The terror running through my veins was unstoppable.
I pressed my back up against the wall, slowly scanning every inch of my room, over and und
er the shadows of the chairs, closet, and dresser.
“What do you want? Why can’t I see you?” I whispered. “Who are you?”
The top drawer to the dresser opened slowly.
My eyes were burning because I wouldn’t blink. I couldn’t afford to blink. A slight cough interrupted my own personal stirrings. It was Logan in his bedroom. I wanted to yell for him, but the fear overpowered my voice.
I was squeezing the sheets so tightly between my fingertips that I was actually causing pain from the rawness I was creating.
“Am I,” the voice whispered, “unclear?”
I couldn’t tell which direction the sound was coming from. It was as if this voice was coming at me from all directions.
The sheet was ripped from my body, and my body went flailing off the bed, only stopped by the wall I crashed into as my body slid to the floor.
My head was pounding, and I felt something trickling down my ear. Looking up, I saw the dresser falling down onto me. Every bone in my body hurt with the weight of the furniture toppled onto me. I crawled as quickly as I could out from under the dresser to the door.
“Logan!” I shouted, finally finding my voice.
“What?” he hollered back, his voice panicked. I could hear a commotion in his room. Oh, no! Did they get to him, too?
Entering his room, I ran right into bed. Sweat was dripping off of me, but I felt ice-cold. My head was throbbing from where I hit the wall, and the rest of my body ached where the bedroom furniture was pushed on me. I felt like I was on the verge of insanity.
He flipped on his lamp, grabbing me and holding me tightly.
“What’s wrong? What happened?” he asked. He had most definitely been sleeping.
“Did you hear anything?” I whispered.
“I heard a thump or a crash. That’s what woke me up,” he replied.
“You’re going to think I’m crazy because I even think I’m crazy, but there was someone speaking to me. Someone was after me in my room.” My eyes felt like they couldn’t focus on anything. Like everything was moving around me on a carousel.
“My God! You’re freezing,” he said, rubbing my arms up and down, trying to warm me up.
“I had the window open.”
“Is that where you think the voice came from?”
“No.”
“I don’t think the window being open would create this type of chill. What did the voice say?” he prompted, his voice deep.
Feeling completely foolish, I looked away. It was like the more I spoke the less I even believed it happened.
“She told me to leave, to get out. She called me by name,” I whispered. “Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?”
“This might complicate things.”
“That’s not all,” I began. “She, or it, opened the top drawer in that dresser and if that wasn’t enough, it tried ripping the sheet off of me, throwing me across the room, and then it toppled the dresser onto me.”
He gently began to move my hair away from my forehead.
“Ouch. That doesn’t look good,” he said. “I think it needs some ice.”
“Do you think I’m crazy?” I asked.
“No, Triss. I know you aren’t,” he shook his head. “You’re bleeding, baby. Let’s get this taken care of.”
“I’ve got some of the heavy-duty pain relief that my aunt slipped to me before we left in the cupboard near the sink. I think I’d like it, please. A few drops in some tea ought to do,” I mumbled.
“You’ve got it, hun. Looks like I should’ve learned more of the healing spells after all,” he tried to bring some levity to the situation, which I appreciated.
I looked around my mom’s room and didn’t want to be here any longer. Things didn’t seem like they were my own after this event. I felt like a stranger in this place. Logan picked me up, and I tucked my head into his chest thankful I didn’t have to walk alone to the kitchen, more because of how frightened I was rather than the pain.
He gently set me down on the couch and began making my pain relief concoction that I desperately needed. The flames from the fire, that hadn’t died out from earlier, began warming me. I looked around the room, noticing how much we had personalized our space since we’d been here. I had herbs and flowers hanging upside down wherever we could find to put them.
My head continued to throb, and the fear was not subsiding.
“What do you think it was?” I asked. “Another conjured Lonely Soul?”
“I’m guessing,” he sighed.
“It’s not going to end until I get my mom back, is it?” I asked.
“I think it’s not going to end until you confront whoever is sending them after you,” his voice solemn.
“You don’t think Trevor did this, do you?” I made room for him on the couch so Logan could sit next to me. He handed me the ice cubes he had placed in a plastic baggie, and I placed them on my head, bringing the chill back to my bones.
“I don’t. For this creature to make it through the barricades and protection spells, it would’ve had to come from someone who really understood how to use the spirits from the other realm. And, truthfully, Trevor wasn’t a really great student from what I was told. He liked to goof-off more than practice.”
“That’s how he was in school too,” I agreed.
“I haven’t been that worried about him because I know how serious I took everything, and he wouldn’t be able to make it against me,” Logan said, his devilish grin making an appearance.
“Do you think that thing would’ve gotten me?”
He shook his head, “If it could have, it would have. I think whoever is conjuring these things is just trying to mess with your sanity. They also have to know that someone is by your side who is willing to do what it takes to protect you. Brenda and Don became an inadvertent message that was sent in addition to taking care of a problem,” he sighed, his eyes shifting away from mine.
I watched the flames dance from side to side as I thought about the emotions that I was feeling. A sigh escaped, as I looked over at Logan wondering how to approach everything.
“I don’t think I can spend the night alone,” I whispered, as I thought about our cottage being inhabited by more than Logan and I.
“You don’t have to,” his voice low and comforting. He reached over to caress my arm.
“You seem chilled,” he replied softly. It was like neither of us wanted to speak too loudly in case we inadvertently called the entities back from wherever they went.
“I’ll be okay. I don’t think much of anything could warm me up right now,” I murmured, closing my eyes to avoid his.
“You aren’t going to walk away are you?” His eyes were shielded.
“When I look into your eyes, I see everything I want to be, everything I want to have, but I’m scared.”
“Close your eyes and let your heart lead the way, Triss. It’s the only way you’ll get the answers you’re looking for, even if I’m not part of that equation,” his voice was no longer his own.
“Oh, Logan,” I whispered, “you are very much part of the equation.”
“I know you’ve been hurt by your father, even though you’d like to think that he never meant anything to you,” he murmured. “And I know on some level that’s why you haven’t fully allowed me in, but I will be there for you, Triss, if you allow me to be. I know what it feels like to lose someone you love, and I wouldn’t do that to you. I wouldn’t cause you that pain. I’ll take care of you.”
“Maybe I’ll take care of you,” I uttered, trying to smile at him. His eyes were intense, scouring every expression I tried to hide.
“I’m giving you everything I have, Triss. I want to be yours, and I want you to be mine. No matter what storms lay ahead for us, I know that as one we can make it. I’m not perfect by anyone’s standards but you make me want to strive to be the best person I can be.” His eyes were full of the same desperate desire I felt.
“You do the same for me, Logan.”
&nbs
p; “Do I?” he asked, his voice full of relief.
“You do,” I nodded, looking up at him through my lashes, feeling a shyness that I wasn’t accustomed to.
“May I have the privilege of being yours, Triss?”
The warmth spread through me in the most unexpected way, and I realized the fear of becoming a Lonely Soul was no longer my reality. Regardless of what was sent to destroy me or take me away, I wasn’t a soul to be taken. I was not going to let my heart harden. I wanted to experience the highest of highs and lowest of lows if it meant getting to experience them with Logan.
“I think you’ve had me all along,” I murmured, moving over to where he was sitting.
I crawled onto his lap, feeling the security of his embrace, and finally allowing myself to fall in love with this man. It might have been eighteen years in the making, but it seemed to be the best gift ever.
I looked into his eyes, feeling the emotions crash down on my soul that I had been trying to bury since he arrived. Pinning him gently to the couch, I kissed him deeply while my hand traveled through his hair, bringing him as close to me as I possibly could. I slowly pulled my lips away from his and lightly traced my finger along his soft lips. His blue eyes brooding as he watched my every move. I continued to trace my finger down his lips, to his jaw, down his throat until I reached his chest where I stopped and noticed his eyes were closed.
“I love you, Logan.”
His breath hitched, as his eyes opened to look at me. His blue eyes were the brightest that I had seen them since the park when he first arrived in Seattle. They were dancing with the hunger that I had seen many times before, and this time I allowed myself to reciprocate.
“I love you, Triss. I always will,” he whispered, grasping my chin with his left hand, bringing my lips back down to his. “But I won’t rush anything with you.”
“Always the gentleman,” I scolded him. Kissing him once more, feeling his hands glide down my spine. Pressing my body against his, I knew someday we would be one, but that time hadn’t arrived.
Our kisses slowly subsided, and I laid my head against his chest, hearing the steadiness of his beating heart.
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