by G. K. Brady
She stood to leave and sent him a wink. “Couldn’t let anything happen to my favorite left-winger.”
That night in bed, Sarah shivered as she snuggled close to Quinn. “Thank God Archer was with your mom and dad. Who could do something like that to a defenseless animal?”
“A wacko named Dory, apparently. Hopefully they lock her up for the rest of her life,” he replied.
“Amen to that.” Sarah rolled over and rested her chin on his chest. His fingers tunneled through her hair, and she relished the feel on her scalp. “Gotta hand it to you, though, Sparky.”
“Hmm?”
“Yet one more woman falls under the Hadley spell. I think you have a new admirer in Officer Easton.”
He flashed his full-dimpled smile. “I promised her some tickets. And speaking of the Hadley spell, how come you’re immune?”
She grinned. “Who says I am? Those impressive hockey reflexes of yours kept me safe—twice—and kept you from getting stabbed.” She tried not to gush, she really did, but it was hard not to. Truth be told, she went a little weak-kneed every time she thought about how he’d dropped Wolf and how he’d shoved her out of harm’s way while twisting his own big body away from Dory’s lethal knife. Power, action, speed—heady attributes that drew her like metal to a magnet.
“Speaking of impressive, your quick thinking saved our asses. You knocked her down before she could carve me up, you’re the one who called nine-one-one, and you thought of tying her up. And you held it together under a shit ton of stress. Courage and grace under fire, Sunshine. I’m awed by you.” He picked up her hand and kissed every finger.
His unabashed admiration heated her neck and face. “But I fell apart afterward.”
“So what? So did I,” he laughed. “As I recall, we both had a serious case of the shakes after the police left. What matters is you were sharp when it counted.”
“Like you said, we’re a good team.” She kissed him long and deep.
Chapter 37
Back to Reality, Whatever That Is
As weeks passed, Colorado loosened more COVID-19 restrictions, and the NHL announced its Return to Play Plan. Teams would begin training camp in mid-July—what would normally be smack in the middle of the off-season. After training camps came team qualifiers and round-robins for playoff seeding, with all games being played in Edmonton or Toronto.
Sarah stood in Quinn’s kitchen, staring ahead vacantly, sipping hot tea in a bid to settle her jolting tummy. Spread out on the counter were Paige’s blueprints, and while the project had held Sarah’s attention earlier, her mind was too far adrift to finish her notes.
Archer let out a yip and took off toward the garage. Quinn’s home. Sarah’s jolting stomach positively galloped … with excitement and dread.
He burst from the hallway, Archer dancing at his feet, tossed his gear bag on the floor, and strode toward her.
“Hey,” he said before he leaned down, cinched his arms around her, and kissed her silly.
She gave him a little shove when they came up for air. “You’re all sweaty!”
“No, I’m not. I took a shower after practice just for you so I’d smell good and you’d want to jump my bones as soon as I walked through the door. Now kiss me and jump my bones already.” He leaned in for another kiss, but she slipped out of his grasp.
A nervous laugh escaped her, and she took another swallow of her tea. “I jumped your bones before you left this morning.”
“So?” He winked at her, and his eyes shifted to the blueprints. “What are you doing with Paige’s drawings?”
“Wrapping up.”
He grabbed a sports drink from the fridge and twisted off the cap. “What did you find?”
Engineering talk was a welcome segue, and she pounced on it. “They’re going to need more piers for that foundation, and the HVAC system has to move.”
“I get the foundation—it looked a little suspect to me too. But why the HVAC?”
“Because a support column needs to go there.” She blinked. “You studied the blueprints?”
He grinned. “Yeah. You know what I do for my work, so I thought I’d check out what you do—in your other job.”
My real job. “Yeah, about that.” Another swig slid down his throat, and she stared in awe as it moved along the thick column of his neck.
“About what?” he asked.
“I’ve been sending out resumes,” she blurted. “In fact, I have a virtual interview tomorrow.”
“That’s great they want you, but aren’t you getting on it a little soon?”
She rushed into her prepared speech. “I don’t think so. Your mom doesn’t need me anymore; she’s doing great. In fact, she and your dad are looking for a service dog. She’s hardly ever here, so I’ve had a lot of spare time.” And I’m bored! “While you’ve been attending your meetings and small-group trainings, I’ve ramped up my job search again. I figure with your full-on training camp starting in a few weeks, you’ll be really busy, and then you’re off to Canada for the playoffs for God knows how long. It’s a good time for me to get on with—”
“So which Denver firms are hiring?” He crossed his arms and leaned against the counter, pleats between his knotted eyebrows.
Crap! Why hadn’t she just told him what she was doing at the beginning? Because it had seemed easier not to until she had something solid.
“I’m not just looking in Denver.” She held her breath, waiting for this statement to sink in. Applying for the out-of-state openings had been driven by one factor: the positions were in prestigious firms like the one in Seattle, and she wanted to find out if she could land a coveted job on her own merits. Whether she’d take it was a different matter altogether.
Quinn’s mouth hung open, and astonishment flashed in his brown eyes. “Where are you looking?”
She tried to keep her voice light. “Mostly in the western states.”
He seemed to measure her. “And tomorrow’s interview? Where’s that company located?”
Inwardly, she cringed. Why was this so hard? “Texas. Not so far away.” No reason to tell him she had interest from North Carolina, Illinois, and Virginia, which had been a huge confidence booster. Now that boost didn’t seem to lift her as much.
He threw out an arm. “How’s that supposed to work? You live in Texas, I’m in Denver, and we see each other every few months? Unless I’m traded to Dallas, which won’t happen if I can help it.” The better part of wisdom made her hold back that Texas wanted her because of her Spanish, and working there would mean long stints in Mexico. A long shot, and even if they offered her the job, what would she do with Archer?
Quinn’s eyes bored into her. Her mouth opened and closed. “We never talked about life after the caregiver job ended, and I just assumed—”
His frown deepened, and she hurried on. “The pandemic has twisted everything. Hasn’t it occurred to you that this … attraction”—she waved her hand between them—“only happened because we were stuck together? And that once we were unstuck, everything would go back to the way it was?” Like Cinderella … who had a happy ending. “Maybe this is a good time to take a break and see if this thing we’ve got is going to survive outside of a forced shelter-in-place.” These arguments had been churning in her head, and they made perfect sense. Surely Quinn’s logical brain would see it, too.
Instead, his volume climbed. “Attraction? That’s what you call what we’ve been doing?” He ruffled his short, damp hair. “Where do you see yourself living if you stay in Denver? And where do you see me living?”
“I assumed you’d move back into the condo you miss so much, and I’d stay at Gage’s until I find my own place here or …” Move away. Except she didn’t want to move away, but she owed it to herself to look at all her options, damn it! It didn’t mean she and Quinn wouldn’t see each other.
“You’re doing a hell of a lot of assuming on your own. Did you assume we’d go our separate ways? Is that what you want? You haven’t once ment
ioned living in my condo with me, so I can only assume that option’s off the table,” he huffed.
She gawped at him. Living with him hadn’t crossed her mind, and if it had … Well, she’d made that mistake with Wolf, and she didn’t intend repeating it. “We never talked about me living there!” she spluttered.
“Because I didn’t see this freight train bearing down on me.” He paused to pull in a breath. “Why not just stay with me? We’re so good together.”
Emotions tightened into a twister inside her. The plea in his eyes reached into her soul, but she needed to do this. For her. For them. Somehow, she couldn’t find the words to explain.
In a resigned tone, he said, “So when are you planning to move in with Gage?”
“The governor lifted the restriction on real estate closings, so Gage and Lily close on their new house next week,” she answered lamely.
“Meaning you’re moving in with them next week. Were you going to tell me or just let me come home to an empty house?”
“That’s not fair!” God, he could be infuriating!
“Neither is putting everything into play without talking to me!” A storm brewed in his expression.
“I don’t need your permission!” Her voice pitched high.
“No, you don’t, but I thought people who were in love discussed big decisions with each other. I classify picking up stakes and moving halfway across the goddamn country a big fucking decision. Instead, you’ve been laying your own plans that you’re just now springing on me. You’re not in a vacuum, Sarah. This shit matters to me. It affects me too.”
People who are in love? He was in love with her? Was she in love with him? She pushed the questions aside because damn, she needed to do a better job explaining.
“When I moved to Seattle, I uprooted everything for a man I never would have started a relationship with in the first place had we not been forced to work together, and look how that turned out.”
A fire kindled in his eyes. In a low, dark voice, he said, “Have you told Gage about us?”
This was not going the way she’d hoped. When she’d played it out in her head, they had an objective conversation where she laid out her doubts, the reasons behind them, and her plans moving forward. In turn, he would say he understood where she was coming from and that he was behind her. They didn’t fight or rip apart at the seams. Instead, they fell into bed and loved each other like they always did. “No,” she said in a small voice.
“Why not?” A challenge tinged his tone.
“Because he knows about my Wolf disaster,” she shot back. “If I tell him about you and me, he’ll say it’s too soon, that you’re the wrong guy for me. Worse, if things don’t work out between us, I’ll have to admit one more screw-up to him. It has a compounding effect.”
“Goddamn it, Sarah, I’m not Wolf! I haven’t hidden a fucking thing from you, good or bad. Want to know who I am? Open your eyes. I’m the same guy I’ve always been, and I’m standing right here.”
“I didn’t say you were Wolf!”
The tempest in his chiseled features gave way to hurt that nearly tore her heart in two. “But you’re judging me based on him. How the hell can this relationship work if you think of us as a ‘mistake,’ a ‘disaster,’ or a ‘screw-up’? The way I see it, ‘taking a break,’ running to Texas for a job—or wherever the hell you wind up—is codespeak for ‘This is my way out.’”
Her anger started to rise. “You’re putting words in my mouth! First of all, I never called us a mistake—”
“Not directly.” He heaved out a sigh. A lock of soft sable hair brushed the tops of his eyebrows, and she had to stifle the urge to push it back, to touch it. Something told her she was about to give up that right, and her heart thumped heavily in her chest.
“Am I supposed to let you support me? Sit around the house all day, building 3-D puzzles, waiting for ‘my man’ to come home so my purpose is fulfilled by fawning over him like he’s the center of my universe?” He took up the crossed-arms pose again, his dark eyebrows inching toward one another, deepening the vertical creases between them. “Quinn, I need to prove to myself—and my family—that I can stand on my own two feet and that I’m capable of providing for myself.” Her plea leaked out in her voice.
“But you already have! That’s exactly what you were doing long before Wolf derailed you.”
Stubborn man! “Why can’t we just move everything to the back burner for a bit and let it simmer while we figure us out?”
“You mean while you figure us out. I don’t need to figure out a damn thing, except whether this was just a fling for you all along. ‘Meh, a younger hockey player might be a fun way to pass the time.’” He paused a beat and gusted out a breath. Her brain was firing like an ignited pack of firecrackers, and before she could process, he said, “All right. You want a break? You got it.”
With that, he pivoted and trod toward his room without a backward glance. Stunned, all she could do was watch him go.
Quinn went from drawer to drawer, an automaton yanking out clothes and stuffing them into a duffel. “This is your own damn fault, you stupid fuck,” he muttered to himself. “You’re the dumbass who told her to use you any way she wanted.” But he’d never expected her to take him up on it. No, cocksure as he’d been, he’d believed she was in as deep as he was. His mother’s words slammed him relentlessly, like the Hulk beating Loki as though he were a dust-filled rug: She’ll give you a run for your money because she’ll be the only woman you can’t impress with just your smile.
Fuck me!
His duffel was overflowing—with what, he wasn’t sure—and he hadn’t touched his closet. He needed at least one suit and some dress shirts and shoes, didn’t he? But going in there, seeing himself reflected in the mirrors, without her … Fuck it! She’d be gone next week, and he’d come back and get the rest. By then, maybe his wounds wouldn’t cut so deep and he could move around the space with a detachment that eluded him at the moment.
He snatched the beanbags from his nightstand—resisting the urge to stop and juggle—threw them in the duffel, and zipped it shut. Relief washed over him when she was nowhere in sight—he wasn’t sure if he’d rail at her like an ass or beg her to stay with him like a pathetic dweeb.
But Archer, the all-seeing, all-knowing wonder dog was there, and Quinn gave him an extra-long scratch.
With his duffel over his shoulder, he grabbed his stick and gear bag and hustled to his truck. As he backed out of the driveway, he wondered what he’d left behind. Besides Sarah. He’d sort it—all of it—at the condo, where he could think without smelling her perfume or seeing her diamond-bright, gold-starburst eyes he’d want to drown in.
An hour later, Quinn stood in his condo alone. The tenants had been on a month-to-month and had moved out weeks before, but he hadn’t done a thing to get it back into the rental pool. Fortuitous procrastination, as it turned out, since he was moving back in. The concierge had met him to inspect the unit, and she’d departed with a breathy, “It’s good to have you back, Mr. Hadley. You know where to find me if you need anything.” Emphasis on “anything.”
Yeah, no thanks.
Now that she was gone, he ran his fingers over the polished, monolithic white island and let his eyes wander to the two-story wall of glass. He’d always loved that view, but now, as he took it in, it left him … cold.
He turned toward the hand-forged stainless-steel-and-glass stairway that led to a spectacular master suite. The staircase had always awed him because it seemed to be suspended in air. Suddenly, he saw it through a new lens. Sarah’s lens. His focus sharpened on a series of cables and bolts he’d never noticed, and he gained an entirely new appreciation for the structure. But like the wall of glass and the counter, it left him cold. The big-ass house he’d never liked flashed in his mind’s eye, filling him with color and warmth. Was it the house or the beings in it? His mother, Sarah, Archer.
A reminder from the concierge beeped on his phone. Rooftop party
in ten. Practice your social distancing. A sign that more pandemic restrictions were being lifted, but he didn’t give a flying fuck. He pictured pretty people clustered in small groups, engaged in a familiar mating dance he wanted no part of. A pang dug into his chest. God, he already missed Sarah.
He couldn’t do this.
With a sigh, he eyed his phone and dialed Paige. She picked up on the first ring. “Security system running okay?”
“Uh, yeah. It’s great. I was just wondering about the lease. It was for six months?”
“Yep, so you’re up at the end of next month, but you have an option to extend for another six.”
“I’d like to exercise that option. Can you set that up? I was also wondering if you could come by the condo and have a look. I’m thinking of putting it on the market.”
“Yes to both questions. I’d be delighted. By the way, I just went over Sarah’s recommendations on my build-out. She says you helped her. I had no idea you were an engineer too.”
He couldn’t hide his surprise. “She said that?”
“Yep. She was very complimentary. So I guess when your hockey career’s up, I can call on you too?” She let out a lilting laugh.
“Nah. She was just being generous. Anything I contributed—and I say that laughingly—was blown out of the water by her expertise. You’ve got a good structural engineer on your team. She knows her stuff.”
“I wholeheartedly agree. So will she and your mom be staying too?”
“Not sure yet. Still working out those details.”
“Well, no matter. Yours is the only name on the lease, so I’ll get the extension ready for your signature.”
He thanked her and hung up. A text blinked, and his pulse bumped up.
Sarah: Archer and I are back at Gage’s permanently. Mansion’s all yours.
His thumping heart sank to his stomach.
Quinn: You didn’t have to leave.
Sarah: I know. Just thought it would be easier on everyone.
His mind reeled. All he could think to text was, Do you think it’s safe?