by Jesse Joren
Around the edges of our online tapestry, I could now clearly see the tattered threads of my real-life lies about my weight and who I really was. I thought I was convincing at the time, but for someone with Hex's perception, the lies were easy to spot.
With a pang of regret I turned to the very last entry. It was less than two weeks before Hex had kidnapped me.
Hex wrote: What's wrong?
Cherry-on-the-Bottom wrote: Nothing
Hex wrote: Bullshit. Everything is off
about you tonight. What is it?
Cherry-on-the-Bottom wrote: Just tired. I may not stay long.
Hex wrote: Send me your phone number.
Cherry-on-the-Bottom wrote: Why are you asking me about this
now?
Hex wrote: Because something's wrong.
Cherry-on-the-Bottom wrote: I don't think that's a good idea.
Hex wrote: This is more than online, and you
know it.
Cherry-on-the-Bottom wrote: That's why it's not a good idea.
Hex wrote: I want to hear your voice.
Cherry-on-the-Bottom wrote: I just can't. Good-bye, Hex.
Cherry-on-the-Bottom has left the room.
Hex wrote: I know you, Evangeline Bright.
Hex wrote: God damn it.
Hex has left the room
My heart pounded as I re-read those last lines. If I'd logged off just ten seconds later, I would have known everything. I had never been anonymous, and he knew exactly who I was.
How differently this whole thing might have played out. I could have gone into hiding or called the police. I would have –
Get the hip-waders. The bullshit is getting deep.
Even if common sense had screamed to protect myself, I wouldn't have done any of those things. That was the hell of the corner I'd painted myself into with Hex.
He was everything I wanted online, and every conversation made me know that it could be the same in real life. Instinct told me that he wanted that, but he was waiting on a signal from me.
The cynic in me said that it could never work. I had lied for too long to come clean at the very end. He would find out that I wasn't the hot girl I'd carefully crafted online. It was only me, Ordinary Eva, regretting my lies but unwilling to confess to them.
There were other things too. Michael's death, my secret cutting, abandoning college, the terrible reason I'd fled Alabama in the first place. Revealing all that to Hex would destroy the one place in my life where I was truly happy.
Natalie had said it best. That Eva was sinking, drowning under a heavy cargo of grief, guilt, and failure.
This last online conversation with Hex had terrified me because I could no longer hide my pain. I logged off to preserve the shreds of the very fantasy that had trapped me. Ironically, that decision had pushed him to kidnap me.
Hex didn't do random. These books were no stroll down a kinked-up memory lane. He was telling me that this could be our future – but it was up to me.
I turned to the phone number on the fly leaf of the first book and traced it with my fingertips.
What are you going to do?
The solid testimony of these leather-bound books was impressive evidence of just how much I meant to him.
It's three in the morning. At least wait until tomorrow to call.
Excellent advice. Too bad I was going to ignore it.
I turned off all the lights, leaving the living room dimly lit with the glow of city lights below. Stretching out on the sofa, I finally found the nerve to dial and hit SEND.
One ring.
Are you crazy?
Two rings.
He's probably asleep. You should be too.
Three rings.
I was just about to end the call when Hex's voice stopped me. It was so clear that he might have been right beside me.
"Evangeline Bright," he said, "what the hell took you so long?"
Chapter Fifteen
The sound of his voice melting into my ear made me realize that this was the first time I'd ever heard him over the phone. If sexy could be converted into one electrifying sound, this would be it.
"Thanks for the books." I was having trouble controlling my voice. "Did I wake you up?"
"I was working. I'm glad you called."
Something in his voice, some faint whisper of vulnerability, made me feel better about my rash decision.
"Don't you ever sleep?"
"Not if I can help it." His voice became very casual. "I'm surprised that bike ride didn't wipe you out. Congratulations. I've always admired your stamina."
Heated scenes from those books still swirled in my mind. Breast bondage. Multiple penetration. Exhibitionism. And one memorable scene with the insistent Great Dane that –
"My phone just got hot against my ear. That must have been some blush." He sounded like himself again, smug and confident.
"Don't flatter yourself," I said, touching my flaming cheeks. "Your phone must be defective."
"It might have been lingering effects from that drink you had at lunch."
So Hex was still following me. What did it say about me that this was starting to feel normal?
"Not an experience I plan to repeat." We both knew that I wasn't just talking about the Marie Laveau.
"Good," he said. "Even though I pushed you in that direction, it didn't make me very happy either."
A warm, thrilling silence fell between us. I was gripping my phone like a lifeline.
"Thinking of you with someone else makes me…unsettled," he said. "I thought this was the right thing, but maybe it's not."
"Hex, I—"
"I want you exactly as you see in those books, Eva. All the way is the only way I know how to love you."
A slow, sweet happiness spread over me. Maybe I'd fallen asleep while reading, and this was all just a dream.
Slow down and give this some –
"I choose all the way too."
In the silence that followed, I heard the change in his breathing. Reckless or not, I was glad I’d said it.
"Thanks for sending me something to read," I said. "So when is the Book of Hex being published, since you already know all of my secrets?"
"With the right methods of persuasion," he said, "you can get those answers without publication."
"My book might be hard to top," I said sassily.
"You think so? That's nothing but a warm-up."
Just the way he said that, the slow and deliberate shading of his words, sent a wave of warmth all over me. I pressed my thighs together hard, trying to control their trembling.
"What might those be?"
"I don't give up information that easily."
There was no question that his voice was becoming more husky, more suggestive.
"Where are you?" he asked.
"You tell me, since you know my every move."
"On the sofa," he said without missing a beat. "Lights off, facing those big windows."
"Not bad. What am I wearing?"
"It doesn't matter because it's about to be nothing. Strip."
"Are you joking?"
"Do I sound like I'm laughing?"
I put the phone down on the coffee table. First the sweater, then the jeans, then my socks, leaving me in nothing but the delicate pink underwear I'd pulled on before my date with Del.
For an instant I thought about leaving them on and saying that I was naked. Just to feel a little more in control –
No. Past little lies had avalanched into huge misunderstandings. This was a fresh start, and I wasn't going to blow it. My fingers were clumsy as I undid my bra, my legs trembling as I kicked off the panties.
With a deep breath I picked up the phone. The coolness of the dark air felt good against my heated skin.
"I'm back. Everything is off."
"Your voice already told me that. I don't think you have any idea how that sexy little tone is affecting me."
That made me smile. "Am I making things hard on
you?"
"Not as hard as they'll be on you, next time I see you."
"When?"
"At a time I choose." He took a long beat. "I have a very specific first date planned for us."
That tone made me catch my breath. Whatever he had in mind didn't sound like a trip to the fair or a romantic movie date.
Oh, well. The Ferris wheel had never been my thing, anyway.
"Are you getting cold?" he asked.
"No," I said, and it was the truth. Waves of heat rippled all over me, seeming to originate and end deep between my thighs.
"You're going out," he said.
"Where?"
"One step at a time. I left something for you to wear in your closet. Go find it."
The tingling returned as I strolled into the bedroom and flicked on the soft closet lights. Everything looked unchanged to me.
"It's behind the evening dresses, against the back wall," Hex said.
Something dark was barely visible behind a fluffy, pale-green gown. I pulled out a dark trench coat as his scent filled the closet. This was primal Hex, bound to heated memories and hoped-for desires like perfume made just for me.
"Since you like borrowed coats, let's see how you feel about wearing nothing else," he said.
My hands were steady as I pulled on the coat, the expensive polished fabric sleek against my skin. If I couldn't be in his arms, this was a very fragrant substitute.
"Now Louboutins. The plain black ones."
I hesitated. The skyscraper heels in my closet were amazing, but wearing them was a different story. I was still learning how not to fall on my face.
Hex seemed to read my mind.
"You're not going far," he said. "Put them on."
The gleaming, red-soled pumps felt cool and expensive on my bare feet. I belted the coat tightly around my waist, holding the phone to my ear.
"Now go to the elevator."
No wonder he seemed so close. He was already here, ready to whisk me away to…wherever. No one would be a more willing captive than me.
This time I made sure to lock the door behind me. The hallway was silent and seemed longer than usual as I walked carefully in the tall heels. Each step made it harder to breathe, knowing that Hex was so close.
"Up or down?" I asked when I reached the elevators.
"You'll find out once you're inside."
I trembled inside of the coat as I waited for the car to arrive. Hex would be there, his gaze scorching me with silver heat.
The doors opened. The elevator was empty.
"Inside, Eva."
The lobby. He's going to meet you in the lobby.
Sure enough, the elevator began to descend. The everything came to a jolting stop.
"You look sexy as hell with your hair all mussed up." Hex's voice was silky in my ear over the phone.
"Good guess."
"I never guess. Look up."
Startled, I scanned the ceiling of the elevator. The red light of the hotel security camera winked at me.
"How many fingers am I holding up?" I raised both hands.
"Four. Two on each hand."
"What did you do, drug the security guard?"
"Very inconvenient when I can access the cameras remotely."
A long silence grew between us. Under the coat, I was acutely aware of the damp heat of my body.
"This view is private," Hex said, cool and controlled. "No one sees you but me. When you're done and back home, they get their camera back."
"When I'm done with what?" My voice sounded as sticky and warm as my skin.
"Open the coat. You need to cool off."
"This isn't fair," I protested, but my fingers were already plucking at the belt. "I want to see you too."
His laugh was low. "When was fair and equal part of the agreement? "
I used one hand to part the coat a few inches, the whiteness of my body peeking through the black folds.
"Wider."
Partially turning away from the camera, I let the coat fall from my shoulders. My heart was thumping, making the heat inside of me build faster.
"Turn around. Face me."
I pivoted toward the red blinking light. The soft, recessed lighting in the roof of the elevator made my bare breasts gleam.
"Drop the coat," Hex said. "No one gets in until we're done. This is between us."
My hands let the coat slide down my legs and into the floor, leaving me in nothing but the Louboutins. Over the phone I heard a string of husky-voiced profanity that was more arousing than any sweet-nothings could ever hope to be.
"You're so damn beautiful. I should burn your clothes again so you have to stay naked. Put your foot up on the railing."
Agility was no problem, and the stretch was easy for me in the heels. I was scorchingly aware of how this position opened up every secret part of me to him.
"Kiss the fingers of your right hand."
I brought my hand to my lips.
"Slide them down your body, like my tongue would be," he said.
Those words burned into my mind as my fingers slid down between my breasts to harden my nipples. I stopped at my bellybutton, glancing with unfeigned shyness at the camera.
There was an unmistakable groan from the other end of the line.
"You're never in more danger than when you look like that. Lower, Eva. Put your fingers exactly where you'd like my tongue to be right now."
He was killing me. Killing me.
With a sudden rush I pushed my hand lower, diving into the deep, hot well between my thighs. Inside the swollen softness was an aching hardness, thrust tight by the position of my legs.
It was impossible to hide the change in my breathing. My fingertip touched the tight little bud of my clit, creating a surge of wetness that made me gasp.
"Right there is where I'm going to be with my mouth, my fingers, my cock," he said. "Use your fingers. Do it hard, and I'm going to watch."
Are you insane? You don't do things like this.
That voice was wrong. This was exactly who I was, the secret side of me that Hex had tapped so long ago. The Eva whose boundaries could be coaxed away, leaving only a bittersweet desire that had to be satisfied.
I pressed my fingers into the sleek wetness that was starting to run in slow drips down my inner thigh. The sound I made was somewhere between a laugh and a scream, my legs turning dangerously weak.
The sharp rise of my orgasm caught me by surprise. I dropped the phone, clinging to the rail with one hand and using the other to coax along a long, slow wave of sensation.
Gradually the elevator took focus again as the world came rushing back. I unhooked my foot from the rail and collapsed into the corner, panting, until my legs felt stronger. Not letting my eyes meet the camera, I plucked the phone from the floor and put it back to my ear.
Silence made me wonder if the call had dropped.
"Are you there?" I asked, still breathless.
"I am," Hex said, sounding less controlled than I had ever heard him, "but seeing that is going to make it hard to wait for the date I have planned."
"When is that?"
"Soon. You please me so much, Eva." His voice was like a caress. "Get dressed. I want to make sure you're home before I hang up."
"What makes you so damn secretive?" I grumbled as I pulled the coat over my sweat-soaked body. "Are you a spy?"
"If I was, I'd get fired or shot for being so distracted by you." The grin was back in his voice. "Are you ready? I'm going to get you back to your floor before I turn the cameras back to the Ritz."
Almost immediately the elevator began to rise back to my floor. In a moment the doors were open, and I started toward my place much more sticky and rumpled than when I left.
"How about you get three questions on the first date?" Hex teased as I unlocked my door.
"I remember that game from Walden. I don't think I ever won."
"Then here's a consolation prize," he said. "You're mine, Eva, and so very loved, even if
I have strange ways of showing it. Get some sleep, and I'll see you soon."
The phone went silent in my hand.
The lingering spell of that conversation was strong and delicious, making me reluctant to disturb it. I fell onto the couch, coat and all, deferring the bed to Roxy for the night.
The soft glow of Buckhead's lights lit the glass window wall as I replayed every word and nuance. For the first time since Hex had left, I felt whole and content.
He's still full of secrets.
He was, but tonight proved without any question was that right or wrong, he had my heart. Drifting off to sleep, I was filled with the sweet certainty that I also had his.
OCTOBER 31
Chapter Sixteen
"You know this is a masquerade ball and not a funeral, right?" Natalie gave my costume a critical eye.
"I'm not cruising for guys." My voice was muffled behind my heavy mask. "What do you think?"
She turned back to my bathroom mirror, rolling her perfectly shaped smoky eyes.
"You're too short in spite of the boots," she said, "and that body padding looks uncomfortable as hell. Darth Vader isn't a soprano, by the way."
"You look great, Nat. I never knew that Little Red Riding Hood liked fishnets and fuck-me pumps."
"Please don't mention it to dear old Granny," she said, applying a final swipe of lip gloss. "I want to keep up the illusion of purity as long as possible."
Something occurred to me as I watched her adjust the low-cut brown peasant dress.
"You haven't rejected anyone in a long time. Have you scared everyone away from asking you out?"
Natalie was famous – or was it infamous – for giving guys exactly one date to make the cut. So far, no one had made it to a second round. Her view was that it was kinder to reject early if they didn't meet her standards.
"Probably," she agreed, "but most of them need a good scaring. Maybe there will be some stout-hearted suitors at the party. Speaking of suitors, where’s yours tonight?"
By now Natalie had heard about the lunch with Del and Hex's reappearance. I gave her the barest outline of the steamy books, but we both agreed those were too personal to share.
"I'm not sure." I pushed up the mask to get some air. "He said I'd be seeing him soon."
In true Hex form, he had been silent since the heated scene in the elevator. I had made the first call, hadn't I? Hot and mysterious or not, Hex had some making up to do.