But it was difficult, because that morning when he’d walked into her office, even though she’d scraped back her hair and buttoned her shirt up to her chin, he saw in his mind’s eye the moment he’d tugged her blouse down her back to expose her breasts, and the way she’d responded not by yelling blue murder and pushing him away, but by opening up to him and encouraging him to thrust harder. How could he forget Coco, even though she’d clothed that persona in the cold, shrewd façade of Miss Stark? The two were one and the same, and although she might not accept that, he could no longer separate them, and he loved them both.
He rested his forehead on the cool glass and closed his eyes.
What the fuck was he going to do? How could he have got himself into this situation? He’d been in the office precisely a week. How on earth had he fallen for her so quickly?
He thought of Lindsey, wondering whether the usual guilt would sweep away his feelings for Coco. But he’d already noticed that Lindsey had not featured in his thoughts much over the past week. And even that hadn’t made him feel guilty, like he usually felt whenever he realised he hadn’t thought about her for a length of time.
He looked down at the dark blue sea of the harbour, but he didn’t really see the waves. He was done mourning. The realisation took his breath away. It had taken nearly seven years, and he’d never forget Lindsey or cease to miss her, but for the first time he felt he was ready to move on. Even in the short time he’d known her, Coco had filled the hollow within him that had been left when Lindsey’s death ripped out his heart.
He’d been lucky enough to meet another woman of his dreams, and yet on Monday he was due to return to Auckland and never see her again.
What was he going to do about it?
“Felix?”
He turned to see Coco standing in front of his desk. She’d caught her bottom lip between her teeth and her hands twisted the pen she was holding. In spite of her calm appearance, she was nervous too, which didn’t help his agitation. If it wasn’t for Rob, he could have completed the interview informally, but Rob had been present at the interviews for all the secretaries and had arranged the time for Coco to visit himself, so it would look weird if he suddenly declared he didn’t need to see her.
“Hi,” he said.
“Hi.”
They studied each other for a moment. She looked stunning, chic and elegant in a dark grey jacket and skirt with a pink blouse that reflected the blush in her cheeks. He was not going to think about ripping that blouse off.
He tried to think of what to say, but his mind emptied. There was too much to say, that was the problem. The day before, they’d walked from the gardens down the long path back to town, arms around one another, talking all the way, but they’d carefully avoided the topic they really needed to discuss—how they felt about each other, and what they were going to do. He needed time alone to sit and think about things, but he had to get this case sorted first because it was muddying the waters, and his lawyer’s instinct told him there was something swimming in the depths that he wasn’t aware of yet, that would illuminate the case when it eventually surfaced.
He wondered whether to mention the night before, tell her again that he’d enjoyed himself, but at that moment Rob appeared behind her, so he kept his words to himself.
“Right, all ready?” Rob gestured to the chairs and Felix picked up his pad and joined them as they sat.
“Thanks for coming,” he said to Coco, trying not to think about the double meaning behind the words. She’s Miss Stark. Concentrate, for God’s sake. This is serious.
Coco just nodded and pushed her glasses farther up her nose, although she continued to look at him over the top of them. Her green eyes appraised him, and he had to tear his gaze away from their mesmerising stare.
He looked down at his pad and took a moment to gather his wits. It was time to don his professional hat.
He cleared his throat. “I’m sure you can expect the type of questions I’ll be asking you, Miss Stark, as you’ve been present during the interviews of all the other secretaries. I apologise for having to put you through the process as well, but as Sasha’s direct superior, your input is obviously required and valued.”
“Of course.” They were the epitome of politeness and professionalism. Her expression had gone carefully blank and she’d stopped fidgeting. He had no idea what she was thinking.
He scrolled down his pad. “I refer you back to the night in question, Monday, the fifth of December. Sasha claims the incident occurred at around six o’clock. Were you still in the building at that time?”
She nodded. “My hours are nine until five thirty, but I’m often here earlier in the morning and later in the evening. That evening I was reorganising the secretarial roster for the week because we’d had two girls ring in sick and another on holiday.”
“Were you there when Peter Dell entered the work room and asked for a secretary to help with his case?”
She nodded again. “Yes. I’d just printed a draft spreadsheet and I was waiting by the printer to pick it up.”
“So you saw Dell enter the office?”
“Yes.”
“What did he say? Can you remember?”
She hesitated. “Not his exact words…” She met his gaze and then looked at her hands.
She didn’t want to tell the truth. Interesting. “A summary then,” he suggested.
“He asked the three or four girls who were still there whether any of them would mind staying a little longer to help him out.” She didn’t look up.
He glanced at Rob, who raised his eyebrows. So Sasha had lied. And at the time, Coco hadn’t corrected her. And even more interesting, she appeared to be disappointed that Dell hadn’t asked Sasha directly. What did that mean? She wanted Dell to be guilty? Why?
His brain working furiously, Felix kept outwardly calm and tapped a few words on the pad before continuing. “Did any of the other girls volunteer?”
“No. Only Sasha.”
“What happened then?”
“He started explaining what he wanted her to do. I only listened with half an ear—I didn’t think it was important, you see. This kind of thing happens a lot.”
“So it wasn’t unusual for a partner to request someone work late?”
“Not at all.”
“And it wasn’t unusual for Sasha to volunteer?”
Again she hesitated. “Actually, it did cross my mind that it was odd. In my experience, there are two sorts of secretaries. Those who are in at twenty to nine, making coffee so they’re sitting behind their desk at nine, ready to start work, and who often stay twenty or thirty minutes past five to finish off a document. And then there are those girls who come in at a minute to nine and leave at a minute past five—and that’s if they work overtime. Sasha has always been the second sort.”
“So it registered as strange for her to volunteer to stay late?”
“Yes. I suppose so.” Again the blank, almost resentful stare. She wanted to defend Sasha. But she couldn’t bring herself to lie.
He shifted uncomfortably, not liking where this was going. “So what happened then?”
“I took my printed spreadsheet back into my office.”
He nodded and jotted a few things down. “Okay. So did you speak to Sasha after she finished the document?”
“Yes. She put her head around the door and told me she was going to drop it into Peter’s office before she left. I packed up and walked out of the office. His door was closed, but I didn’t think anything of it. I assumed she’d left and he was working on his case. I left the building and went home.”
Felix sat back in his seat tiredly. He was no closer to deciding whether Peter was at fault, and now he had a headache. “Can you remember what Sasha’s behaviour was like the next day?”
Coco shrugged. “She didn’t seem much different at first. She was always fairly quiet and kept herself to herself. She sat at her desk with her earphones in and concentrated on her work. It wasn’t unt
il about halfway through the day that I got a phone call from the head of HR who said she’d just been into his office and filed a complaint against Peter.”
“How did you feel about that?”
She stared at him. He could see his question had thrown her. “How did I feel about it?”
“Yes.”
“What’s that got to do with it?”
Her defensiveness told him how she felt, and he knew his initial instinct that there was something she wasn’t telling him about Dell was right. Had she had an affair with Dell? Jealousy surged through him, hot and fierce, shocking him with its intensity. “I’m curious,” he said, meeting her gaze, challenging her.
She continued to stare at him, then eventually lowered her eyes. The human equivalent of a dog rolling over and showing its underbelly. “I was glad,” she said. She raised her eyes again and they were cool and defensive. “Happy now?”
Chapter Forty-One
Coco saw the frown crease Felix’s brow and cursed herself for her honesty. Why couldn’t she just lie and say she didn’t feel anything at all? But she’d always been a terrible liar, and part of the problem was that deep inside she wanted to confess what had happened all those years ago, for Sasha’s sake—because she could see Felix struggled to believe the young secretary—and for her own. She wanted Peter punished for what he’d done to her.
But she couldn’t bring herself to say the words.
Felix glared at her, his iPad lying forgotten in his lap. “Did you have an affair with Peter Dell?”
Rob Drake, who’d been sitting quietly up until this point taking notes, looked up, glancing across at Felix and then over to her with curiosity.
Coco kept her cool. “No.” Well that was true anyway. One quick fuck was hardly an affair.
Felix didn’t say anything, and she could see he didn’t believe her, but he couldn’t outright call her a liar. Her heart sank. He thought she’d had a thing for Peter. How wrong could he be?
“So why were you glad when you heard that Sasha had filed a complaint against him?” Felix pressed.
She shrugged. “I don’t like the man. I don’t like his attitude toward women. I knew he’d had office affairs—that he used women and then cast them aside when he’d done with them.” She couldn’t stop bitterness creeping into her voice.
Felix stared at her, then looked out of the window. Was he thinking she was referring to him—that she thought he was doing exactly the same thing? Or did he think that’s what happened between her and Peter—that they had an affair and he dumped her, and she was bitter about it? Either way it sucked, and she couldn’t ask him because Rob was still sitting there quietly, chewing his pen as he observed them.
Felix ran a hand through his hair. Agitated, then. But he looked calm. Was he going to press her in spite of Rob’s presence? But he didn’t, he changed tack. “You say ‘I knew he’d had office affairs’. How many were you aware of?”
“Seven or eight definitely, over the ten years I’ve been here. And I suspect there’s been many more.”
His eyebrows rose. “And nobody’s ever complained about him before?”
She hesitated then, and looked down at her hands, examining her fingernails. How could she explain to him the sort of man Peter Dell was? She puzzled for a minute, then decided she had to just come out with it and be honest.
She sat back in her chair and looked at Felix, suddenly tired and wishing it was all over. She’d known this would be difficult, and she’d suspected it would be the death knell for their relationship. It was Felix’s birthday and they were supposed to be going out to dinner with his friends that evening, but would he still want her to go after this?
“You have to understand what kind of man Peter is,” she said, all resistance gone. “On the surface he’s funny and charming. When he talks to you, he makes you think you’re the most important person in the world. He knows all the tricks—eye contact, asking you questions about yourself, all the body language to prove he’s interested—and he uses it to its utmost. Practically every woman he comes into contact with falls for him.”
Including me, she thought miserably. She’d been bowled over by his sweet talking, made to think she was special. And she’d been too young to see through his act, the fact that he was only playing a part, wearing the charm like a costume.
“Do you think he does it consciously?” Rob spoke for the first time. “Even if they say they don’t, most people use their ‘charm’ to interact with the opposite sex.” He looked at Felix. “Including me and you.”
The look on Felix’s face made a giggle issue from her lips before she could stop it. He sent her a wry glance before turning back to Rob. “That’s bullshit.”
“No, it’s not.” Rob leaned forward, eager to prove his point. “It’s perfectly natural—it’s how we communicate. I know Sasha got upset by your intimation that she was dressing to attract attention from the opposite sex, but the truth is that although we dress for ourselves because we want to feel good, we do dress for other people too—it’s human nature. Everyone loves a compliment. And the truth is that men and women flirt with one another. It can be very subtle, or it can be overt, but we all do it.”
“I don’t agree,” said Felix. “I’m always very careful not to flirt.” He flicked a glance at Coco, as if to say apart from with you.
“It depends on your definition of flirt,” said Rob. “I don’t mean it has to be double entendre and personal comments all the time. But we use our charm to get women to warm to us. That’s flirting.”
“No, it’s not.” Felix glared at him. “That’s just communicating.”
Rob looked over at Coco. “What do you think?”
“Well, I tend to think of flirting as overtly sexual, comments that are more intimate, personal references, that sort of thing. But I think you have a point. It’s in our genes to communicate in this way. We all know that if we want someone to do a job, the best way is to give them a compliment, ask with a smile, and if it’s a really big ask, maybe finish with a touch on their arm or something.” She smiled as they both raised his eyebrows. “You thought Miss Stark never utilised those techniques? Of course she does. Is it flirting? I wouldn’t call it that because it’s not meant to bring about a specific outcome. But after watching Peter and seeing how he interacts with others, I agree that many people do use their charm.” She shrugged. “That’s why Sasha finds it so difficult to communicate with others—she has no natural charm, no way to get people to warm to her.”
She fell quiet, and so did Felix for the moment. She met his gaze. His anger seemed to have evaporated, and like her he seemed tired and a little defeated. This case had certainly got to him.
“Do you think Peter Dell made inappropriate sexual advances to Sasha De Langen?” he asked.
Surprise rippled through her. It was an un-lawyerly question to ask, because her answer would provide no evidence, and opinions should really count for nothing. But she wasn’t going to pass up on this opportunity to voice her feelings about the senior partner.
“Yes,” she said. “I do.” After all, Sasha had told them herself she was gay. Why on earth would she have made advances to Peter if that was the case? It was time the man got his comeuppance for all the women he’d used and abused over the years.
Felix nodded. He glanced at Rob and smiled. “Okay, let’s call it a day. I think we’re done.”
The three of them rose.
Rob glanced at them both. “Okay, I’m just going to get myself a coffee. Then we’ll do a summary, eh, Felix?”
“Sure.”
Rob left the room.
Coco breathed out a long sigh and met Felix’s gaze. At least he no longer seemed angry with her. “You think Rob knows about us?”
“I think he suspects.”
“Will he say anything?”
Felix shrugged as if to say don’t know, don’t care. She got the feeling he was thoroughly fed up with this case. He was probably desperate to return to his ow
n branch.
She bit her lip, not wanting to think about that now. Instead, she reached into her folder and, casting a quick glance at the door, extracted a small, flat package and handed it to him. “Happy birthday.”
He took the package and his eyes met hers. A smile spread slowly across his face. “I thought you’d forgotten.”
“Of course not. We’re going out for a birthday meal later, aren’t we?” There, she’d told him she still wanted to see him. What would he say in return?
Something like relief crossed his face. “Yes. Gene’s picking me up at six, then we’ll come around to you.”
“Okay.” She nodded at the parcel. “Aren’t you going to open it?”
He smiled and tore the paper off to reveal the circular disk—a coaster with the words Lawyers do it in their briefs.
He grinned. “I love it.”
“I’m sorry it’s not an expensive piece of tom, but…”
He laughed. “Since when have you used ‘tomfoolery’ for jewellery?”
“All the time,” she said airily, then grinned. “I looked up some. Honestly, most of it’s so convoluted I had trouble understanding.”
“That’s kind of the point.” For the first time since she’d walked into his office, his eyes took on the look of lazy desire she was beginning to know and love. “By the way, not connected to Cockney but still connected to language, did you know that the French word for a kept woman is a ‘Cocotte’?”
She gave him an indignant look. “Charming.”
“I thought you should know.”
They smiled at each other, and her heart rate sped up a little.
He put the coaster on the table and slid his hands into his pants pockets. “I’m sorry,” he said, taking her by surprise.
“What for?”
He gestured around the room. “Having to do that.”
“It’s okay. It had to be done.”
He looked down at the floor. “Did you tell the truth?”
He meant about Peter, she was sure. He wanted to know if she’d meant it when she’d denied having an affair with him.
Five Exotic Fantasies: Love in Reverse, Book 3 Page 25