by Annie Dalton
Anna sat up. ‘If you could live anywhere else in the world, where would it be?’
Jake shook his head. ‘I’ve been thinking about that a lot. The trouble is, I don’t know if Oxford would work. And, as you know, I have someone quite special in Oxford.’ He tried to smile.
‘Doesn’t matter,’ she said fiercely. ‘It doesn’t matter to me where I live. Not anymore. I came back because of ghosts.’ And that’s what I was turning into, she thought. Another ghost. It was a chilling revelation. Ghosts couldn’t change, only repeat their past actions over and over and over.
‘Are you serious?’ Jake looked astonished. ‘You’d really—’
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Yes, I would. Really. Anywhere.’
Next morning, Anna got up to see Jake off to the airport, then, since there was no point trying to go back to sleep, she took Bonnie for a dawn walk over Port Meadow, where the birds were singing with that high-octane, heart-piercing intensity that she associated with English springtime. She walked for almost two hours, amongst the cow parsley and flowering hawthorn, where wild horses grazed, peacefully as they had done for centuries. She kept hearing herself say, ‘Yes. Yes, I would. Anywhere.’ She loved Oxford, but for the first time she imagined the possibility of leaving. She’d come back because of her grandmother, but she’d stayed, she thought, because this strangely timeless city had once been her world, a world where she still had parents and siblings, a future. Anna hadn’t died that summer’s night, but nor had she been truly alive. Until now.
When she got home, she made herself coffee, opened the French windows and settled down at her kitchen table with the prospectuses. She became so engrossed that she jumped in surprise when her mobile started to ring. She didn’t recognise the number but she suspected it might be Thomas Kirchmann.
‘Hello.’
‘Anna? It’s Alice Jinks. I’m here in Oxford at the train station.’ Alice sounded strained, almost scared. ‘I need to speak to you. It’s – it’s quite urgent. Is it convenient if I come to your house? I know it’s terribly short notice.’
‘No, it’s fine,’ Anna said. ‘I haven’t got anything planned.’ She gave Alice her address, wondering what on earth could have happened.
Alice Jinks arrived on Anna’s door step about twenty minutes later. Dressed in a pair of old yoga trousers, trainers and a faded Henley top, her hair scraped back from her face in a ponytail, she was hardly recognisable as Herr Kirchmann’s highly-groomed PA.
‘Thank God,’ she said fervently, the instant Anna opened the door and she briefly closed her eyes. ‘Thank God, you’re Ok. I’ve been out of my mind worrying.’
‘Let’s go downstairs,’ Anna said. ‘I’ve just made some fresh coffee. I hope you don’t mind dogs?’ she added as they descended into Anna’s sunny kitchen.
‘No, no I like dogs,’ Alice said, so distractedly that Anna doubted she’d even registered the wolf-sized, White Shepherd interestedly sniffing around her trainers.
‘Sorry. I must seem a bit mad.’ Taking the nearest chair Alice gave Anna a wan grin. Anna poured coffee into two of the new, midnight-blue mugs and brought them to the table. Alice wrapped her hands around hers and Anna saw that she was trembling.
‘I don’t know where to start.’
‘It’s usually best to start at the beginning,’ Anna said.
Alice shook her head. ‘Too complicated. We’d be here for hours if I went back that far.’ She sipped shakily at her coffee. ‘This is very good.’ She was gazing around the room as if she’d forgotten why she’d come. ‘You’ve got a lovely home.’
‘Alice, what’s wrong?’ Anna asked.
‘I wanted to warn you,’ Alice said abruptly, ‘that day when you came to the auction house looking for Herr Kirchmann. I was terrified for you but I didn’t know what to do. We’d have been overheard. There’s always someone listening. And Alexei …’ she shivered.
‘As you see, I am perfectly OK,’ Anna said. ‘But I’m interested to know why you thought I might not be.’
Alice set down her mug. ‘Ok, I’m just going to come out and say it. I have reason to believe that Alexei and Herr Kirchmann are using Hempels as some kind of front for illegal activities.’ She heard Anna’s sharp intake of breath. ‘I know,’ she said softly. ‘Quite a shocker.’
‘Go on,’ Anna said huskily.
‘It’s like I’m being gas-lighted, you know? Every time I draw Alexei’s attention to yet another document that doesn’t make sense or some reference to a meeting – that, for whatever reason, I’ve been deliberately excluded from – he tells me I’m being a hysterical paranoid woman.’ She gave an edgy laugh. ‘Maybe I am! But, God, Anna when I think of what happened to your family, I’m terrified.’
Anna went completely still. ‘What are you saying?’
‘I’m saying it’s all happening again!’ Alice sounded anguished. ‘Only this time it’s me! I’m the one stumbling over their dark secrets, just like Julian did!’ She began fumbling in her bag, scattering tissues, train tickets and an oyster card. She pulled out her phone, turning it so that Anna could see a picture.
‘This is my little girl. She’s two.’ Alice took a shuddering breath. ‘She’s called Poppy. She’s my life. She’s everything, Anna. If something happened to her …’
Anna stared down at the picture of the solemn little girl. There was something oddly familiar about her face.
‘She looks like me, doesn’t she?’ Alice said. ‘She’s certainly nothing like her father,’ she added swiftly. ‘He’s not in the picture any more, I’m glad to say.’
At that moment, Anna realized that she had no idea who Alice was. She’s got a child and she thinks she’s in danger. She felt a prickle of fear.
‘Do you mind closing those French doors?’ Alice said abruptly. ‘Not to be a hysterical, paranoid woman or anything.’
No one would be able to hear them, but Anna did as she asked.
‘Alexei outright lied to me, Anna.’ The angry words seemed to burst out of her. ‘I know he knew Lili. I know she used to work for Hempels.’ Alice gulped some of her coffee. She flashed an unreadable look at Anna. ‘You shouldn’t have told my boss you were going to Innsbruck. That story he tells, you know, the Kirchmann legend, “the Righteous Gentile”, that’s his shtick, his Open Sesame. Everyone loves it and the business comes rolling in. I thought he was going to … Oh, God!’ She buried her face in her hands. ‘This is a nightmare.’
There’s always an alternative narrative, Anna told herself, fighting for calm. She didn’t doubt the authenticity of Alice’s terror, she could feel it like a coming tsunami, but nor did she want to get pulled underwater with her.
‘You seriously think,’ she said, as evenly as she could manage, ‘that because I asked a few questions in Innsbruck, Herr Kirchmann thought it necessary to draw on his extensive funds and contacts, not just to discredit me but someone like Clara Brunner?’
Alice gave her an odd little smile. ‘Wouldn’t be the first time. They succeeded in convincing everyone my grandfather was senile, didn’t they?’
Feeling as if she was going mad, Anna said, ‘but you told me that story.’
‘I know! Because I had to follow the party line! You saw how Alexei was listening to our conversation. Who knows how long he’d been hanging about outside?’
Anna’s mobile started to ring. Alice caught sight of the number of Anna’s caller.
‘It’s my boss!’ she hissed. ‘Don’t answer!’
Anna ignored her and took the call. ‘Good morning, Herr Kirchmann, how are you?’ she asked, striving to sound normal.
Thomas Kirchmann’s jolly, Father Christmassy voice came booming down the phone.
‘And good morning to you, Anna! Did you have a wonderful time in Innsbruck? I hope you went up into the mountains? They’re so beautiful this time of year.’
‘I did have a wonderful time,’ she said. ‘We didn’t get up into the mountains unfortunately, as we had to cut our trip short.’
‘I�
�m sorry to hear that.’ Anna couldn’t tell if Herr Kirchmann was surprised. ‘Are you still able to meet me for lunch on Wednesday?’ Alice frantically shook her head.
‘It’s Ok,’ Anna mouthed to her.
‘Yes, that’s fine,’ she told him. ‘Shall I come into Hempels?’
The instant Anna had ended the call, Alice jumped up from her seat.
‘Have you got a death wish?’
‘Alice, I can’t just hide away from all this!’ Anna told her. ‘We’re not in a Jason Bourne movie. There isn’t going to be a sniper waiting on a rooftop!’
Alice let out a grim little laugh. ‘Don’t be so sure. I’m his PA, Anna. I know who Herr Kirchmann’s meeting for drinks on Wednesday night.’
Anna was finding this new volatile Alice hard work. It felt too much like being trapped with her younger self, at her paranoid worst.
‘Who?’ she asked wearily. ‘Who is he meeting?’
For the first time, Alice deliberately met her eyes.
‘Dominic Scott-Neville.’
FOURTEEN
Anna rinsed and dried their coffee mugs, while she waited for Alice to finish freshening up in her bathroom. She wondered what she was supposed to think about Alice’s feverish accusations against her bosses. Though Anna had her own doubts about the new guard at Hempels, she distrusted Alice’s motives in bringing her troubles to Anna.
Anna was finding it hard to get a clear fix on Alice Jinks. She still had a mental image of her squashed into the back of the car between her boss and Alexei, coolly sending and monitoring Thomas Kirchmann’s emails on the move, as if caring for her employer’s needs was the sole reason for her existence. It wasn’t like Alice had lied about being a single mother, Anna thought. She simply hadn’t advertised the fact, and why should she?
Anna wondered if Alice’s family helped her out, or if she was bringing up Poppy entirely alone. If so, Alice must be stretched to the limit, taking care of her demanding boss by day, then going home to her still very young child.
She heard the toilet flush but minutes went by and still Alice didn’t come downstairs. She’d been unusually pale, Anna remembered, perhaps she should go up and check that Alice was Ok?
At that moment, she heard a faint creak of floorboards over her head. Her study.
Fear and fury sent Anna flying up the stairs. Alarmed, her White Shepherd came dashing after her, paws skidding on polished wood.
The study door stood open. Inside, Alice quickly stepped back from the armoire. She turned to Anna, smiling, seeming utterly composed, not at all as if she’d just been caught snooping around someone’s home.
‘Do you have any idea how valuable this cupboard is?’ She asked in a reproving tone.
‘What the hell are you doing in here?’ Anna could hardly breathe for rage. ‘That door was closed.’ Bonnie had come to sit beside her; Anna could feel her quivering, every canine atom on high alert.
For an instant, there was absolutely no-one at home behind Alice’s eyes. Anna could almost feel her swiftly recalculating. Then she held out her hands in an imploring gesture and, for the first time, Anna noticed her nails, bitten down to the quick.
‘Anna, I’m so, so sorry! I simply didn’t think. I’m permanently terrified. I’m all over the place. And your home is so beautiful. Everything here is so perfect. And I couldn’t help wanting …’ Her eyes filled with tears.
‘I don’t want to be rude,’ Anna interrupted, fighting to keep control. ‘But I think you should go.’
‘You don’t believe anything I’ve told you, do you?’ Alice said, tearfully. ‘You think it’s all a pack of lies.’
‘I didn’t say I disbelieved you,’ Anna said. ‘But you need to go now.’
She closed her study door, made Alice wait in the hall while she fetched her bag, then showed her to the door.
At the bottom of the steps Alice turned around. ‘I was up all night with my little girl. I didn’t have to come here, Anna. I came to warn you. You have no idea what you’re getting into. Don’t trust anybody.’
‘Including you?’ Anna said.
‘You must make up your own mind about that,’ Alice said coolly. For a moment, Anna saw the aloof, unflappable PA. ‘I was trying to be your friend,’ she added. ‘To look out for you, because of us both being Hempels girls. I’m leaving now, but please, Anna, watch your back. I see you’ve got a burglar alarm? Then I’d advise you to use it.’
She took out her phone, as if dismissing Anna from her thoughts.
‘Yes, can I have a taxi? Right away please.’ Anna watched her walk to the end of the crescent, still talking on her phone. She looked ridiculously young and defenceless. Anna closed the door, activated her alarm and realized she was shaking.
No, she didn’t trust Alice Jinks. Not now. While Alice’s fear was viscerally real, her explanation of corrupt goings-on at Hempels struck Anna as far too convenient. Alice had her own agenda. Anna only wished she knew what that was.
If this was a movie, the villain, whoever he or she was, would be accompanied by an ominous soundtrack. But all Anna had to go on were her own instincts and they’d almost got her killed. Twice.
She made herself more coffee, forcing herself to concentrate on each part of the familiar process, as she fought the almost overwhelming compulsion to check on her murder cupboard. Like the nosy girl in a Brothers Grimm fairy tale, Alice had found her way unerringly to the one part of Anna’s home that was out of bounds and the violation had shaken Anna to her core. She heard Alice’s chilly little voice saying, ‘I see you’ve got a burglar alarm? Well, I’d advise you to use it.’ Had that been a warning or a veiled threat?
Anna took her coffee up to her sitting room, followed by an obviously concerned Bonnie and saw Jake’s jotter pad, where he’d left it on her book shelves. She sat staring blindly at his spider gram, but could only see Alice coolly stepping back from the monstrous cupboard with its ugly secrets.
She made herself picture Jake waiting at the Gare de Lyons, with his arms full of roses and how he had said: ‘We’ll go home and we’ll try to figure out what the hell is going on.’ She saw him in Isadora’s kitchen, his pen moving swiftly over the jotter she was holding in her hands, his absorbed expression. Gradually her whirling thoughts calmed and the names, places and events recorded in Jake’s surprisingly readable handwriting appeared out of the blur. She studied them for a few moments to remind herself of the order of events, then she turned to the page where Jake had written SUSPECTS and been interrupted by Isadora’s announcement that she was making gravy.
Anna frowned as it dawned on her that her current list of suspects was unlikely to fill an entire sheet of paper. In fact, she could only think of two names that belonged under Jake’s heading: Thomas Kirchmann and Dominic Scott-Neville.
Next morning, Anna drove to Abingdon where her brother lived with his family. Isadora, Anna’s usual go-to-dog-minder had been asked to give a lecture at Somerville, Isadora’s old college. Not wanting to leave Bonnie by herself for another long day, Anna had asked Tim if he’d mind taking her.
She turned off the A34 and eventually found the turning into the modern estate, where Tim lived with his family. She parked in Anjali’s space and let Bonnie out of the back. She thought she could hear Loki, Anjali’s Bengal, yowling from inside the house, but it could have been the baby.
Tim opened the door, unshaven and crumpled in a sweatshirt and jeans, holding his four-month-old daughter in his arms. The baby’s enviably long, dark eyelashes were still gemmed with unfallen tears. After lengthy discussion, he and Anjali had named her Edith Rose; Edie for short. ‘We intend to call all our daughters after Edwardian housemaids,’ Tim had joked. Edie gave Anna a delighted if teary smile.
‘Hey, she recognises you,’ Tim said. ‘Come in and try to close your eyes to the chaos. Sorry about Loki. He’s trying to guilt-trip me into letting him outdoors.’
In the sitting room, the coffee table was strewn with bibs, crumpled tissues and Edie’s half
-finished bottle. A paperback copy of How to Calm your Baby had been left face-down on Tim’s laptop. Loki, whip-thin and moody as a supermodel, glared down at them from the top of the book shelves with marigold yellow eyes and let out another heart-rending yowl.
‘I’ve just got time for a cup of coffee,’ Anna said. ‘I’ll take little Mademoiselle here.’ She took Edie from her brother and the baby immediately grabbed hold of a strand of Anna’s hair.
‘Oh, she is getting really strong.’ Edie let out a triumphant shriek. ‘And loud!’ Anna’s little niece had Anjali’s jet black hair, with occasional glints of mahogany. She smelled of soap flakes and baby shampoo.
‘Listen Edie,’ Anna confided, knowing that Tim could hear, ‘I’m going to make you a promise. When you’re thirteen and awash with hormones and teenage angst, I shall take you to one side and I shall frankly and faithfully answer all your questions, Ok?’
‘Ha!’ Tim called from the kitchen. ‘The bare minute Edie turns thirteen I’m going to lock her up in a high tower. No frank talk needed!’
Bonnie came and sat by Anna’s knee. Edie let out another delighted shriek and reached out with little starfish hands to this thrilling new creature.
Tim came back with their coffee. He gently took Edie from Anna’s arms and strapped her in her baby-seat.
‘If we’re in luck she might fall asleep and we can talk.’ The baby’s dark brows knitted in protest. She drew a breath, turned brick red and let out a roar that made Loki’s ears go flat.
‘Or not,’ Tim said philosophically.
Bonnie padded over to the baby, sniffing her over with soft whiffling sounds, as if she was trying to identify the source of her distress. Edie stopped yelling and gave a startled chuckle. Entranced by her new playmate, she began to coo and babble to the dog.
‘Lie down,’ Anna told Bonnie, thinking that Tim might not like her getting so close to his tiny baby. Bonnie obeyed but made sure to stay where the baby could see her, her brown eyes super-alert.
‘She’s guarding Edie,’ Anna realized, amazed. ‘It’s like she’s picked the most defenceless person in the room.’