She crept along the side of the house, straining her ears for the slightest sound. There was a low rustling but nothing concrete. She held her breath as she reached the corner of the house where stood pressed against the siding, contemplating what to do. If she chanced a look and Cole saw her, she would never find out what he was planning. It would also be the last time he trusted her or was careless enough to be followed.
As slow as her muscles would allow, she inched her face ever closer to the corner of the house, just barely peeking one eye into the backyard. Cole was standing on a chair, reaching up to a screen window. In the darkness, it took Amy a second to register what she was looking at, but then the moonlight glinted off the blade in his hand. She covered her mouth to stifle a gasp. He was slicing through the screen, creating an opening, and before Amy could react he had climbed through.
Under any other circumstance, she drew the line at breaking and entering, but she had a sickening knowledge that Cole was about to do something awful. She ran her shaking hands through her hair, hesitating for only a few seconds before following Cole through the screen window.
The moment she was inside, the only thought running through her head was, Oh god. I'm in a stranger's house. I'm going to get arrested. What do they do to underage criminals? I really don't wanna go to jail. But I even more don't wanna be shot by whoever lives here when they see a shadow creeping through their house.
Her train of thought was interrupted by the sight of Cole reaching the base of the stairs leading to the second floor. His foot was already on the bottom step.
“Cole!” she whispered as loud as she dared. “Are you crazy? Get out of here before they call the cops!”
“Are you kidding me?” Cole breathed. “You followed me?! Get the fuck out of here.” He stepped toward her, and Amy noted the knife still gripped in his right hand.
“I don't care what you think you need to do. We'll figure something else out. We always do. Please, come home.”
Cole's nostrils flared. “Darryl should be dead. Not Meredith. My pathetic weakness killed her and saved no one. He still needs to die.”
“That's crazy. You know it was a heart attack. No one is responsible. You can't blame someone to make yourself feel better. It won't work.”
“I'm doing this now. I strongly suggest you leave.” He turned his back on her and made his way to the stairs.
“I won't let you!” Amy stumbled through the living room, grabbing wildly for support. “I'll drag you back if I have to.” She caught up to Cole and latched onto his free arm, yanking him away from the stairs.
“Get off of me,” Cole roared, his voice rising above a whisper. He yanked his arm to free himself from her grasp, but when she didn't let go, he shoved her with an inhuman amount of strength.
Amy stumbled back, landing hard on her tailbone, bringing tears to her eyes. When she moved to get up, Cole towered over her, and in a deathly fierce voice whispered, “If you try to stop me again, I'll kill you like I killed your mother.”
The room began to spin and grow distant as the air seemed to gain weight, pressing down around her, sucking the air from her lungs. “Cole, no, no.” In her darkest moments, she had had a vague suspicion that Cole was responsible, but never would she actually believe it. “Please tell me that isn't true. Please.” Still on the floor, she pushed herself further away from him, seeing in front of her a person she did not know, someone she did not want to know.
“It is. And I enjoyed it.” A sick smile spread across his face as he stalked closer to her, his left hand playing with the knife hilt. Before she knew what was happening, he was on top of her, slowly bending his face towards hers. “You're a real nuisance, you know that? It's becoming harder to keep you around than to just get rid of you..” He switched the knife to his other hand and took a long look at the blade. “That's really tempting. What do you think? Do the Williams care enough about you to start a search party when you go missing? Or here's an idea. If I kill you here, Darryl and his family will get blamed and that would be two birds with one stone. And the best part is, I don't even have to touch you. No evidence... Oh, I like the sound of that.”
“Cole, no. Please.” She was whimpering now, her body paralyzed, her eyes glued to the knife. “I'll go. I'll leave right now. Please.”
“It's too late to back out now. You followed me in here, you pay the consequences.”
Her entire body had shut down. There was a stranger in those eyes that were staring down at her, a maliciousness like nothing she had ever seen. He was enjoying this. She didn't have the brain capacity to wonder what had happened to him. All she could think about was how unfair it was to die before her life had hardly begun. Even if she had the strength to fight back, Cole was freakishly strong. She opened her mouth to scream for help, but no sound came out. Her vocal chords were failing her when she needed them most. Giving up all hope, she closed her eyes and waited for the end of it all.
There was a piercing pain in her side that renewed her terror, and her eyes flung open, looking for a knife plunged into her. The knife, however, was still in Cole's grasp, bloodless. In fact, he had not moved a muscle, but continued to stare down at her. She did not have time to puzzle this out as another piercing pain ripped through her. She opened her mouth to scream again, but this time it felt as if something was physically constricting her throat. It was no longer fear holding in her voice.
That was when she realized she was paralyzed. Truly paralyzed. It was as if every muscle was struggling against a lead weight. As she lay there helpless, wave after wave of pain crashed through her, sucking away her consciousness, sending her spinning into a dizzying empty void.
26
It was like waking from a dream. For a while, something had been trying to arouse him from his foggy unknown state, but he was content where he was and he resisted the urging voice. The voice had not give up, only grown stronger and more desperate. He resisted as best he could, but over time, the haze around him lifted and he 'heard' the voice. There was no sound in this place, but the meaning was conveyed well enough.
Cole? Can you hear me?
Travis? Where are you? Where am I? What's happening?
You joined your own consciousness with the collective consciousness in your mind.
How long was I out?
A few days. Look, I need you to listen carefully because there isn't much time. You need to take back control of your mind immediately.
I don't want to. I hate myself. I like the nonexistence I was in. I can't think there. Please don't disturb me again. He started to drift off.
Amy's in trouble. She needs your help.
Cole paused. I'm sure she can figure it out. I never did her any good. She'll be better off without me.
No, she can't. You're the only one who can help her.
Why? What's the danger?
You.
Trying to think in the haze was like trudging through molasses. That's impossible. Don't screw with me.
Think about it. Think of all the instructions you get. Do they generally help people?
...what kind of danger?
You have a knife in your hand.
No! In a burst of energy he exploded out through the haze, shoving his way through the voices around him. Get out of my way! Where's my damn consciousness? He pushed in one direction, but when there was no change, he chose another at random. I'll never get out of here. Damn this! He looked in every direction, lost, and losing hope. I'm sorry, Amy. I'm nothing but a failure and waste of space.
Travis appeared nearby. Stop giving up so easily. It's sickening. Come on. I'll show you the way out.
Cole followed behind Travis. For a while there was no change and he began to doubt Travis' knowledge, or if this was even Travis at all. Then the voices began to thin and he burst forward with the renewed energy of a racehorse nearing the finish line. He shoved his way inside his mind, pushing out the others who had taken up residence, and slowly but surely he found his way back into his body
. He stood still a moment, getting a grasp on the situation and waiting for his vision to clear. In a rush, he realized that everything that had happened while he was gone was in his memory, but it was as if watching his actions through someone else's eyes. As his mind caught up to the present and he comprehended the scene in front of him, an uncontrollable revulsion shook him to the core.
* * *
Cole continued to glare down at Amy, unmoving, seeming to be frozen. The pain ceased in an instant, so completely it was as if it had never been. She stirred back to full consciousness, thankful to be alive, but still frightened. She inched her way out from under him with no reaction. As she stared, a slow change crept across his face. It was so gradual that she did not notice it until there was an expression on his face that did not remember being there. It began with anger, reduced to blankness, and then further transformed, ending with pure horror.
“Cole?”
Before Cole could find his voice, there was the rumble of a car pulling up to the curb outside the front of the house and he turned his head to look through the front windows. “They heard us. The cops are out front.” Unable to deal with anything but the urgency of the present situation, he shoved the knife in his pocket and bent down to help Amy to her feet.
She scooted away from him, terror still clear in her eyes.
“It's me again,” Cole said. “I'll explain everything later but right now we need to get out of here.”
The slamming of a car door brought the gravity of the situation to Amy, and she scrambled to her feet. She ran back through the house and through the torn screen into the backyard. “Now what?” she said, once he had followed her out the window.
Cole noticed she kept her distance from him, but at the same time her fear of him seemed to be fading. “Follow me.” He jumped the fence in the back and sprinted through the next yard to the street out front, Amy close on his heels. Afraid to stop for a second they continued to run towards Beth's house, and not until they were clutching their sides in pain did they slow. Even at a jog, they did not say a word until they were both safely back inside the house.
They threw themselves through the front door and, panting to get air back in their lungs, leaned against the door. Amy, desperate for some answers, wasted no time once she could breathe again. “What... the hell... happened to you?” she gasped in between breaths.
Cole gulped a few more lungfuls of oxygen before answering. “It's kinda hard to explain. Those voices in my head? I let them take over. I haven't been aware of anything for a long time. If it weren't for Travis, I don't think I would've ever come back.”
“Travis? He's dead.”
“I know, but it's not just his memories I have. That day he died, he transferred some part of himself into me. I felt it but didn't know what it was at the time.” He paused. “I don't even know where to begin. I am so sorry. About everything. For the last few days, everything I did, it's like someone else was doing it. I swear, I won't ever let it happen again. I was just so depressed, I didn't know what to do. It was the easy way out. It was weak. I don't know how, but I will do anything to make it up to you.”
Amy was unable to make eye contact. “Was what you – they – said true?”
“What are you referring to?”
“Did you -” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Did you kill my mother?” As soon as Cole hesitated, she assumed the worst. “I'm going to sleep on the couch.” She pushed herself to her feet and left Cole behind, never looking back.
Cole watched her go, each step deepening the pit in his stomach. To be honest, he did not know if he was responsible. In a moment of rage he had wished ill on her parents, which was only shortly before the incident, but never in a million years would he have thought his wish would be granted. Was it all a coincidence? If not, it was an accident and he had no idea how he had done it.
He did not want to push it tonight, not after their scare at Darryl's house. He decided to sleep on it, to better phrase his explanation in such a way that Amy would forgive him. He may only have one chance to set things right and he was desperate not to mess it up. Besides, he was having enough trouble piecing together his memories from the previous days. He had a vague recollection of seeing Leonard Roberts, but he was not yet sure why that was coming to mind.
Travis? Are you there?
There was no response, and he was too afraid to slip back into his subconscious to seek him out.
His dreams were haunted by flames and the terrified, dying faces of the investigator interspersed with his mother and Dr. Stern. Twice during the short night he awoke with a start, covered in sweat. After the second nightmare, the first rays of sunlight were creeping through the windows. He lay awake, trying to concentrate on his speech to Amy, but being overwhelmed by the loss of his mother. She would know what to say. She always had the answers. “I miss you so much,” he whispered into the dawn as he curled into a ball.
When he could no longer tolerate the depression, he tiptoed toward the kitchen for an early breakfast to distract him. He glanced at Amy sleeping peacefully on the couch as he passed, and in that moment was struck by how much he cared for her, how much he needed her more than ever. She was his last ray of sunlight in this bleak, uncaring world. He lingered there until she stirred, and then he crept the rest of the way into the kitchen.
Beth was the next to awaken. She stumbled into the kitchen, eyes half-closed, and removed the orange juice from the refrigerator.
“Morning,” Cole said.
Beth grumbled a response as she poured herself a glass. After a couple of sips, her eyes opened the rest of the way and she scrutinized Cole up and down. “You look... different,” she said.
“Huh. Yeah.”
“How are you feeling?”
“Better. You?”
“Fantastic as always,” she mumbled and took another swig of juice.
Amy walked in then, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Cole started up in his seat, eager to start the day off right, but without even a glance in his direction she said to Beth, “Can you please drive me home?”
Beth glanced up at the clock. “So early? Won't they still be sleeping?”
“Doesn't matter. I have a key.”
“All right, let me get dressed.” She finished the last of the orange juice and departed for her bedroom.
Amy left immediately as well, but Cole followed her into the library. When he entered, she was staring out the window, and did not turn away.
“Amy, please listen to me.” He took her lack of response as an affirmative. “I don't know if I'm responsible. I was just angry and was thinking crazy thoughts. Haven't you ever had bad thoughts about anyone?” He waited anxiously for a reply, his palms sweaty and shaking.
Yes, but I don't have your abilities,” she said stoically to the window.
“Who knows if my thoughts actually affected anything? I don't have the slightest idea what these voices are capable of. It could all be a horrible coincidence.”
“Why else would they say something like that?”
“Maybe they were messing with your head, trying to scare you. Who knows? They're insane. But no matter what, at the very least, I can assure that I never wanted this. Not really.”
“I understand. Give me some time to think. Now please leave. I need to get dressed.”
“Yeah, okay. And hey, tell Sam I'm ready to fly that model airplane?”
“Uh huh.”
Cole stepped out of the room, closing the door behind him. Amy emerged only when Beth was ready to take her home. Cole did not accompany them. Instead, he sat on the floor in the corner of the library, piecing together the memories of the past few days. All in a rush, the scene at Leonard Roberts' house crashed around him, shooting his eyes open in nauseous horror. He bolted into the bathroom to dry heave into the toilet, and then sat there, hugging the bowl, as sickening images barraged his brain.
You're all maniacs in there! What the hell? In an act of desperation, he sank into the o
uter limits of his subconscious. Travis? Where are you?
Here.
Why have I never heard from you before?
I've been fighting to get to the surface for months. It took a while to even know who I was and where I was, and then even longer to get my bearings.
Do you know how you got in there?
I assume it was because I had been working so hard to establish a connection with you. The way I knew what instructions you received was by slightly delving your mind. I never got very far with it, but when I knew I was dying, I used my last remaining consciousness to penetrate as far into your mind as possible. Any more than that, I don't know, but apparently it worked.
Cole disengaged himself from the toilet and leaned back against the wall, absorbing the fantastical information as best he could. Travis, you've gotta help me. I can't live like this anymore. I have to get rid of these damn instructions. Do you know where they come from?
From what I can figure out, there are other consciousnesses in here that give you these instructions. As to who they are or why the instructions are so evil, your guess is as good as mine. My instructions seemed to be only to help others. I wish I could be more useful.
Maybe you can be. Since you're in there, can you see if you can contact these other consciousnesses and find out what's going on? Maybe you can figure out a way to stop them or at least their instructions.
Of course. What else am I gonna do? There's not many movies to watch in here. The presence of Travis faded until Cole was alone in his mind again.
Sometimes I wish I was just crazy. Then I could take some pills and the voices would go away. How much easier would that be? He picked himself off the floor and made his way to the library to attempt to distract himself with some reading. Until Travis got back to him, there didn't seem to be much he could do except take his mind off the fact that his entire life was riding on Travis' success.
Shadows Within (The Dark Mind Trilogy Book 2) Page 20