by DB Jones
Jacob watched his aging father retire for the evening. His gait was slower than usual, and he relied on the railing for more support with each climb of the stairs. “I hate to see Dad deteriorating the way he is. Maybe I should suggest changing rooms with him. I don’t mind the stairs, and I could use one of the other rooms as my office. I’ll talk to him about it in the morning.
Jacob opened Sydney Parker’s files. He wanted to find out all he could about the life she once lived hoping to discover the reason behind her isolation. “This woman seems to get around in her apartment well, and the idea of going outside isn’t because she’s frightened; so what is it?”
The wind began whipping the trees sideways, sending a broken branch against the side of the house. Jacob gathered the papers and walked to the window. As he stood watching the trees bending in the wind, the thought of what Ms. Parker would do if caught outside during a storm entered his mind. Would it trigger a fear or memory? “Maybe something about her accident makes her reluctant to venture outside. Is she afraid of being stranded, or does it remind her of what happened? Perhaps her self-imposed isolation is her way of protecting herself.” He yawned, stretched his neck, walked back to his desk, set the file down and headed for his room.
Sydney watched the trees thrashing toward the ground as the wind whipped through the park across the street. “What do those poor cats do during bad weather.” She rolled her chair into the other room. “Anna?”
“Yeah?”
“Have you ever seen Mrs. Foster take anything other than food for those cats?”
“Mrs. Foster?”
Sydney cocked her head. “You know who I’m talking about.”
“I do, but wouldn’t you rather call her by her real name?”
“Please, just answer the question.”
“Not that I noticed, but I did see a man carrying plastic tubs into the same area where she feeds them. I’ve seen him do it a few times.”
“Plastic tubs?”
“I think I saw a hole at the end of one of them. The lids were on, so I don’t know what was inside.”
“Well, next time you go to the park, see if you can find where those cats stay at night.”
“Nope.”
“No? What do you mean no? You’re out there anyway.”
“Syd, if you want to know what’s going on over there then let the Doctor or me take you there. What’s the big deal?”
Sydney swung her wheelchair around and stormed off to her room grunting under her breath the entire way. “Was that so much to ask? You go over there all the time.” She slammed her door and wheeled back to the window. “Damn it. If I could, I would go over there myself.” She mumbled under her breath. “You know you’re not going to do that, Sydney Parker. What makes you think you’ll ever leave this place? You’re all talk.”
She leaned against the glass wall to feel the coolness of the outside against her cheek. There were a few runners in the park but no one just strolling or enjoying themselves. She looked as far as she could toward the east side of the park and then the west. “I haven’t seen Trent out lately. I wonder if he’s okay?”
She saw a couple huddling under a blanket as they made their way across the street. “Is that Heather and Luke? I’ll bet it is. He’s built like Luke and walks like him, but Heather is much more petite than that. I guess it’s someone else.” She sighed and moved away from the window and back to her desk.
Sydney sat staring at her keyboard and the blank page on the computer, waiting for inspiration, but nothing happened. The roar of the wind intensified and suddenly the memory of her trying to run home during the storm was at the forefront of her thoughts. The lights from the car that suddenly appeared from around the corner blinding her. She remembered being hurtled into the air, and a sharp pain shooting down her legs. She had no other memory from then until she awoke in the hospital. “How can I remember the pain when I can’t recall the car hitting me? What am I blocking from my memory?” She turned away from the computer and slumped over her the table.
“Sydney, are you okay?”
“Oh, I didn’t hear you there Anna. Yeah, I’m okay.”
Anna approached the side of the wheelchair and put her hand on Sydney’s shoulder. “Can I fix you a cup of tea?”
Sydney looked up and smiled. “That would be nice. I’ll be there in a minute.”
Anna turned and walked toward the door, stopped and turned to see Sydney still slumped over her desk. She breathed in a big breath of air and returned to the kitchen.
Sydney made her way to the bathroom, splashed cold water on her face, and stared into the mirror. “What’s wrong with you?” She forced a slight smile then headed for the kitchen.
“Anna?”
Anna had just put the kettle on for tea and was emptying the dishwasher. “Yeah?”
“Have you talked to Doctor Thornhill since he was here last?”
“No. Why?”
“No reason.”
“Syd? What’s on your mind?”
“He’s a curious one. I keep thinking about him trying to get me to go outside. The more I think about it, the more I seem to be getting flashbacks of my accident.”
“Are you remembering anything?”
“No, and that’s what’s troubling. Why do I have this block? I can remember seeing the lights of the car and flying through the air. And today I remembered feeling the pain in my legs. That’s a new memory. I hadn’t thought about it until Doctor Thornhill mentioned the pain I was feeling the other day. Don’t you find that strange?”
“Not really. You’ve suppressed that memory, but it’s in that head of yours. You just have to recall it.”
Anna handed Sydney a cup of tea. Sydney smiled. “I remember Momma serving my granny tea in this cup when I was a little girl. I so wanted to drink from it, but Momma said I was too young. I think of her every time I drink from these porcelain cups.” She took a sip and leaned back in her chair and waited for Anna to take a seat. “Anna, do you think that my not wanting to go outside is because of some memory I’m suppressing?
“Could be.”
“It’s not that I’m afraid of going out there…”
“Are you sure? Maybe what you’re really afraid of is that you’ll remember what you’ve been blocking all these years, and you don’t want to face it.”
“You think so?”
Anna gave a slight shrug. “I’m just stating a possibility.”
Sydney blew the air out in her cheeks. “Doctor Thornhill is up to something. I can feel it.”
“The only thing you’re feeling is his desire to help you, and you don’t like it. You might learn something about yourself outside of this place, and it wouldn’t hurt you to have a life on the other side of this glass prison you’ve imposed upon yourself.”
“What are you talking about? This place is not my prison. It’s my sanctuary.”
“If that’s the story you’re sticking to, okay. But a sanctuary is a place one retreats to, not confines themselves to.” She picked up the tea cups and returned to what she was doing in the kitchen.
“That’s all you’re going to say?”
“Sydney, if you’re looking for me to agree with you, you’re wasting your time. I happen to agree with the good doctor, and deep down, I think you do, too. Now, don’t you have some work to do?”
“You’re so pushy,” Sydney declared as she grinned and returned to her desk.
CHAPTER 3
Jacob was half asleep when he heard a noise coming from upstairs. It sounded like something fell. He walked to the hallway. “Dad, is that you?”
There was no reply.
“Dad, are you all right?”
Still, there was no answer. Jacob bolted up the stairs and down the hall to his father’s room. He swung open the bedroom door to find his dad lying on the floor. “Dad!”
“I guess I fell out of bed. I must have had a dream. I’m okay, Son.”
“Are you sure?” he asked as he helped his fa
ther back into bed.
“Of course. Heck, you used to fall out of bed all the time when you were a youngster. I must have been dreaming that I was running,” he answered forcing a chuckle.
“Okay, but we need to talk about some things in the morning.”
“Son, don’t jump to conclusions that your old man is ready for the old folks home.”
Jacob tilted his head and smiled. “I didn't think that at all. Now, go back to sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow.” Jacob walked to the door, hesitated then turned to his father. “I love you, Dad.”
“Love you, too, Son. Now get out of my room so I can get some sleep. I have a big day tomorrow.”
Jacob nodded his head and went back downstairs. He sat on the edge of the old four-poster bed where his grandparents once slept. “I suppose he could have been dreaming, but there’s something he’s not telling me. He has always feared the idea of spending his last days in a nursing home. Doesn’t he know that I would never let that happen?”
He turned off the light, laid his head on the stack of pillows and finally fell back to sleep.
Jacob had two surgeries scheduled for that morning. He was up, showered and dressed before 6:00 a.m. He put on the coffee pot and headed outside to get the morning paper. By the time he returned his father was pouring a cup. “You want some?”
“Not yet. I think I’ll wait until the pot finishes brewing,” Jacob chuckled. “You’re up early this morning.”
His dad slid onto the barstool at the kitchen counter. “Well, I need my morning coffee right away. Have you given any thought to what we discussed yesterday?”
“What was that, Dad?”
“About me retiring, or at least stepping down from surgery.”
“So you were serious?”
“Of course I was serious. Son, I’d rather do it on my terms than having the hospital force me out. I know I’m getting slower. I don’t want to wait until I’m responsible for someone’s death due to my actions. I think it’s time. Not to mention there are other things I’d like to pursue.”
“Like what?”
“Your mother and I always talked about traveling or maybe taking up golf.”
“Dad, you hate leaving home, and I don’t see you out on the golf course knocking around a ball all day. It’s not your style.”
“Yeah, you’re right. However, I can still make a contribution in my field. I have several articles started, plus I was thinking of doing a Cardiac blog.”
Jacob lifted his head and grinned. “Now that’s something I can picture you doing, but first you’ll need to learn how to use social media.”
His dad smiled. “I can learn.” He took a big sip of his coffee. “Good grief,” he blurted as he spewed his coffee out. “This coffee would kill a horse.”
“You took the first cup made, what did you expect?”
His father dumped the cup of coffee then poured a fresh one.
“Dad, are you still planning on going out tonight?”
“Yes, why? Have you changed your mind about joining us?”
“No. But I’d like to discuss something with you when I get home. I have to leave now. I have two surgeries scheduled for this morning, and I want to check on my new patient.”
“Sure. I’m not leaving until 7:00 p.m.”
“Good. I should be back before that. If not, I’ll catch you in the morning.”
“Anything serious, Son?”
“No, just an idea and I wanted to get your opinion on. See you later.”
Jacob headed for the hospital where he changed into his scrubs. Brian was already there waiting for him. “You missed a good time last night. Jenna’s friend is a drop-dead gorgeous woman. I think you would like her.”
“Brian, I don’t have time to date right now. You know that. Besides, I don’t want someone to fix me up. I’ll find someone when the time is right. My career comes first right now. I’ve got time for that later.”
“Are you kidding me? Your clock is ticking, my man. By the time you get around to dating, all the good ones will be taken.”
“A bit much, Brian, don’t you think? Now let’s take care of this young man on the table.”
Brian gulped a breath of air and followed Jacob into the operating room.
The morning light shone through the large picture window of Sydney’s room, and the aroma of freshly brewed coffee drifted into her bedroom. “Is the coffee ready?”
“Yep. You ready for a cup?”
“Please.”
Sydney hoisted herself up against the headboard, adjusted her pillow and waited for Anna.
Anna strolled into the room and handed her a mug. “You have therapy this morning at 9:00 in case you forgot.”
“I didn’t forget,” she grumbled. “I’m not sure it’s doing any good. I get plenty of exercise getting in and out of my chair and dressing.”
“You do, but it’s not with your legs.”
“And why do I need to exercise my legs? I’m not going anywhere.”
“Just because.”
“Anna, that’s not an answer. You don’t know why either, do you?”
Anna sat on the edge of the bed. “Syd, exercising your legs keeps the muscle mass from deteriorating and taxing the rest of your body. Just do the dang therapy. You know it’s good for you.”
“You’re right. Sometimes I wonder what’s the use. I’m never going to walk again.”
“How old are you?”
“What kind of a question is that? You know how old I am.”
“Quit acting like a child. Do your treatments the way you’re supposed to. Besides, who knows what modern science will come up with in your lifetime.” Anna got up and started for the door.
“You think that someday there will be a magic pill I can take, then suddenly jump out of this bed and run around the lake like Trent?”
Anna smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “You never know.”
“You are such a dreamer, Anna.”
“Yes, I am.”
Sydney sipped her coffee and thought about what Anna said. She set her cup down and lifted herself into her chair, rolled into the bathroom and turned on the shower. Before she moved into this place, a contractor remodeled the bathroom so she could wheel into the shower stall to a bench to bathe on her own. With help from the therapist and Anna, she became very proficient with the maneuver.
She dressed then headed for the kitchen for more coffee.
“Well, I’m ready for another grueling therapy session.”
“Good. Would you like some toast and more coffee first?”
“Anna, you’re too good to me. Thank you, I would.”
While Anna was making the toast, Sydney rolled her wheelchair to the French doors overlooking the park but just sat looking outside.
“I could bring your toast outside for you if you’d like.”
Sydney turned around. “No. I’ll eat in the living room.”
“Okay.” Anna finished making the toast and set it on the coffee table. “If you ever want to give it a try, it’s okay. I’ll take you out there, and if it doesn’t work out, I’ll bring you right back in and never mention it again.”
“I know you mean well, but for what reason do I need to go out there?”
“Just to smell the fresh air, hear the birds sing, and feel the warmth of the sunshine on your face. Haven’t you ever wondered how that would feel? Don’t tell me you’ve never thought about it or remembered what it was like.”
Sydney lowered her head and was about to answer when there was a knock at the front door.
Anna got up to answer the door. “Good morning, Amy. Sydney’s waiting for you.”
Sydney smiled. “Would you like some coffee?”
“No thank you, but you go ahead and finish yours, I’m in no hurry.”
“I’m not that hungry this morning. I’d rather do my therapy now and get it over with if you don’t mind.”
“Of course. Let’s get you back in bed to stretch those legs.”
Amy started stretching her legs and each time pulling a little further.
“Ouch, that hurts.”
“I’m sorry.” Amy stopped, pulled out an instrument and measured the stretch.
“What are you doing?”
“Doctor Thornhill asked that I keep a record of how far you stretch each day before the pain starts. Now, can you tell me what degree of pain you felt when we reached that point you cried out?”
“I didn’t cry out. I just said ouch.”
“When you said ouch, then.”
“It was a six, but I could have stood more stretching. It’s just when I began to feel the pain. Go ahead and pull a little more.”
“No, I’m not here to see how much pain you can endure but to document at what the point it starts. Now let’s do the other leg. I’m going to stretch in various positions, and you tell me when you begin to feel pain. Are you ready?”
“Yes.”
Amy began stretching but quit before Sydney said anything. “Why did you stop? I didn’t say anything.”
“You’re expression told me that it was hurting you. Miss Parker, if I stretch you beyond the point of pain, I could do more harm than good. Not speaking up when you feel pain only hurts your progress.”
“What progress? I’m not going to be getting out of this chair to walk or anything, so why not push me harder?”
“I have my orders. I think that’s enough for today. Do you need assistance getting back in your chair?”
“No thank you. Amy, do you mind me asking you something?”
“No, what?”
“Why does Doctor Thornhill want you to track my progress with this new stretching and pain levels?”
“I’m not sure. You’ll have to ask him. All I can tell you is that he was adamant about not pushing you past the point of discomfort right now.”
Sydney gritted her teeth. “Is that all he’s told you about me?”
“He told me you were injured when you were young. Miss Parker, that’s all, except what I was to do and not to do with your treatments right now.”
“Thank you, but Miss Parker makes it sound so formal. Please, call me Sydney.”