I pressed my eyes closed but I saw Jenson’s face again. Laughing as he walked backwards closer and closer to the land mine. That sound of the metallic click and then the white noise.
It might as well have been me because I was as good as dead.
Chapter 2
Brooklyn
I sighed as I tied the black apron to my waist, a mandatory part of the uniform at the bar. I was in the back room where I usually changed after my waitressing shift at the diner a few blocks down. Today, I’d barely had time to grab a coffee before I ran to the bar. I’d tried to drink the coffee from a styrofoam cup as I got in, and loads of it had dribbled on my blouse. Thankfully, I never left my apartment without a fresh change of clothes stuffed in my bag.
I stared at myself in the small plastic framed mirror on the wall of the back room. I looked tired and I thought I detected dark circles under my eyes. Twenty-six with dark circles and exhausted green eyes. That was the best description anyone could give for me if I ever disappeared. My hair was long and just like most days, I’d styled the brown waves into curls. I tied it up into a loose bun on the side of my head now. Working shifts at the bar wasn’t exactly the time or the place to look my best, and besides, I’d stopped putting in much of an effort. Not since Luke…
I tucked in some stray strands of hair haphazardly behind my ears as I walked out to the bar and pasted a smile on my face. No matter how tired I might actually be, I still needed to pretend like I was enjoying myself. No matter how intense the pain in my back was from standing all day, I had to keep that fake smile pasted on my face. I couldn’t lose these jobs. I needed both of them. I wasn’t even thinking about the money anymore. I just needed to keep busy so that I wasn’t thinking of Luke all day.
I began by polishing the glasses, just as the doors of the bar were opened to the general public. These few minutes of standing behind the counter, polishing the glasses with freshly washed cotton towels were my moments of peace. In an hour, the place would fill up with regulars and strangers alike, and I’d be too busy to even notice how my shoulders ached and how the smile on my face was beginning to droop.
Even though these minutes were restful, they were also dangerous. The lack of having to make small talk with customers; gave my mind a chance to wander. And Lo and Behold! I was thinking of Luke again.
I had to remind myself that he wasn’t my older brother anymore. That he didn’t actually exist. When I got the call two months before, I didn’t know how to react. Even though the possibility of his death…of all our deaths…loomed at the back of my mind as an inevitability, I was just not prepared. He was my brother, my flesh and blood…and he was all I had.
Daddy was dead, but his death was easier to deal with because I had Luke then. We were going to look out for each other, be there for one another. Luke made sure that I was under his wing at all times, that I never felt alone. And now who was I supposed to turn to?
Mom…well, I didn’t know our mother at all. She left when I was a baby, when my memories hadn’t even begun to form. Luke claimed he remembered her, even though he was just two years older than me. He claimed that I had her green eyes, and the same long brown hair but daddy had removed all photographic evidence of her from the house. So, I had no way of confirming if that was true. Luke was capable of saying anything to make me feel better. He would have done anything for me, and I knew I would have done the same for him.
I gulped as I remembered him. My hands were mechanically wiping the glasses. Even though my mind was elsewhere, I was handling them with care. Wiping and polishing to remove water stains and placing them on the drying racks in front of me. Then picking up the next glass to carry on the same procedure.
Luke was twenty-eight, too young to die and he would have had a successful life ahead of him. He was passionate and stubborn and fiercely protective of me and if he was still alive, I would have been just a regular, happy and normal girl. I might have even wanted more from life than working late hours at the bar. But I wasn’t that same girl anymore. I was half of the person I used to be. The other half had died along with Luke and nothing was going to be the same again.
“Hello, sunshine,” the guy with the deep brown eyes said, taking a stool at the counter in front of me. He’d become somewhat of a regular at the bar, and I was aware of how all these guys liked to flirt. I didn’t mind because it gave me something else to think about, but I also made it abundantly clear to them that I was in no way interested.
This guy had longish dark hair that reached his shoulders and a ready smile on his lips every time he saw me. At least he was younger than most of the middle-aged men who frequented the place. Sometimes I wondered if I was leading him on, if he was coming to the bar so often because he thought he had a chance with me.
“The usual?” I asked him, and didn’t wait for a response before I started pouring a finger of Jack into a glass for him. He grinned widely when I slid the glass over to him and he leaned over the counter, to bring his face closer to me.
“Did you get a new haircut darling?” he asked and I looked at him from under my heavy lids, trying to grin, trying to forget Luke who was always at the back of my mind.
“No,” I said, as blankly as I could, so that he wouldn’t feel encouraged to continue this conversation.
“Okay, then it’s your makeup. There’s something different about you,” he said and I noticed the way his eyes roamed over me, over my body…dropping to my breasts, before settling on the spot between my legs.
I felt my cheeks flush and I turned from him and walked some distance away. There was no way I was going to return his advances. I had no interest in him or any of the men who frequented this place. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time I was interested in anyone. If it was…it had to have been before Luke died. Because since then, all I’d felt was emptiness.
“Where are you going, honey?” I heard the guy’s voice, while I had my back turned to him.
“Nowhere,” I replied and I continued to polish the glasses, just at some distance from him.
“Come back here. I want to talk to you,” I heard him say and I kept my back firmly turned to him.
“Get outta here before I kick your ass!” I heard a voice, and before I’d even turned around, I knew that it was Viper. I let out a small breath that I didn’t realized that I was holding in. When I turned around and looked at them, Viper was holding the other’s guys collar bunched up in his hands and pulling him off the stool. When the guy had scurried away, Viper took his chair and fixed a smile on me.
“You didn’t have to do that. I can take care of myself,” I said to him, rolling my eyes indulgently at him. As much as I hated to admit it, I was thankful that Viper scared the guy off so I wouldn’t have to dodge his advances for the rest of the night.
“It was my pleasure,” Viper said and reached for the bottle of Jack Daniels and poured himself half a measure as I watched him.
I’d tried being polite with Viper already, letting him down gently every time he asked me out, but he just wasn’t getting the hint. Besides, these guys weren’t anything if not persistent. Luke was just like them. He was just like his friends.
“Here by yourself? Where are the others?” I asked him, walking up to him with two glasses in my hands and the towel thrown over my shoulder.
“Just me. I thought I’d stop by and check up on you before I go meet the others,” Viper said, and even though I wasn’t looking at him, I could feel his eyes on me. Searing my skin as he watched my every move. Would it have been very bad if I was attracted to Viper? He belonged to the MC world that I knew so well. He was a friend of Luke’s. I’d known him for a long time…but I couldn’t just conjure up feelings for him when they didn’t exist.
“You don’t need to check up on me every day, Viper. I’m fine,” I told him, trying to smile as genuinely as I could. Ever since Luke’s death, the guys were constantly checking up on me. They were afraid that I was depressed…and they felt the same protectivenes
s towards me that Luke had felt. In essence, I’d inherited a dozen new protectors in the place of my older brother, and I wasn’t exactly thrilled.
“I know I don’t, Brooklyn, but there’s no harm in it either, is there?” he said, sipping his whisky as he spoke to me. I shrugged my shoulders and sighed. There was no winning an argument with these guys, I knew that. Daddy had been the same and so had Luke.
Members of The Dragon Knights did not back down. People who messed with them, learned that the hard way.
Essentially, they were all the family I had left now and at the thought of that, I smiled at Viper. He might have been trying to date me, but ultimately, he was still a part of the gang. One of Luke’s friends, and I appreciated the support they had all shown towards me since he passed.
I poured him another measure of Jack in his glass and he picked it up and tipped his head in my direction.
“You’re an angel, Brooklyn,” he said with a smile and took another large sip. I wished I liked him that way. Despite his harsh appearance of tats lining his arms and most of his torso, I could tell he wasn’t as hard as he seemed. I just felt more like he was an older brother. Not that he could ever replace Luke, but the way he tried to protect me reminding me of that brotherly feeling.
“Thank you, Viper, and now if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to get back to work,” I said, still smiling at him and I walked away from him towards some of the other people who had taken seats at the counter.
From the corner of my eye, as I took their orders, I saw Viper finish his drink in one large gulp and then he was gone.
How long was someone from the MC going to be sent to check up on me every night? I knew it was supposed to make me feel protected. They were doing it because I was a little sister to them, just as much as I was to Luke, but I was worried that I might start feeling claustrophobic soon.
I was born into the MC. It was my father and brother’s legacy and I wouldn’t have changed anything about them. It was my duty to accept the MC’s protection now. I was a part of the family, but I knew that along with that came a lot of expectations. There were things I was supposed to do and things that weren’t allowed.
I tried to focus on the chatter of people in the bar now, and on the drinks that I was pouring and the money I had to collect. But I couldn’t help but wondering what Luke would have expected me to do about Viper. What would he have wanted for me? The number one rule of the MC was loyalty. That much I knew. Which meant that I was expected to eventually end up with one of them and it seemed like Viper had called dibs on me.
Chapter 3
Gunner
I headed to Church. After being around them enough, I knew the Bad Disciples called their meetings that. My dad and older brother, Bryce, had attended enough of them through my lifetime for me to be familiar with the term. But I wasn’t sure what it exactly entailed. I was just following orders.
The Rusty Pelican was the Bad Disciples’ haunt, a motorcycle bar in Long Beach and when I entered, I instantly realized that the bar had been cleared of everyone except members. I still couldn’t understand why they wanted me there, why Axel had asked me here specifically. I had nothing to give them.
Axel’s hair had considerably whitened since I last saw him. He’d been good friends with dad and now he was sitting on a high stool in the middle of the bar. Some of the others were playing pool nearby, while others were sitting around drinking. The lighting was too low in the place for me to see their eyes. I preferred looking into people’s eyes. It gave me the upper hand.
“Gunner!” Glock appeared out of nowhere and thumped my back and when he said my name, an immediate hush fell in the room. I thumped Glock’s back too, glad to see my friend…but I couldn’t shake off the feeling either. The feeling that there was something not quite right.
“Axel’s been waiting to talk to you,” Glock said and I looked up at the older man. He was stocky, muscular, with a long beard that used to be dark but was turning gray now. Various tattoos snaked up his arms, and he was clad in leather vest, white shirt and worn jeans. He had fixed a cold stare on me and I looked back at him, holding his gaze.
“Axel,” I tipped my head at him, while the other members of the Bad Disciples surrounded me in a tight circle.
“Gunner,” Axel said my name in a quiet calm voice and I clenched my jaw. “What makes you think you can come back to town? Right under my nose,” he added and a deathly silence had descended upon us in the bar. I fisted my palms on my side. I had no idea what he was talking about, but I knew it couldn’t be good. Had Glock knowingly led me into a trap? I was severely outnumbered and even though I was a highly-trained killing machine, even I wouldn’t have survived an attack from all these men singlehandedly.
Axel burst out in a loud laugh, and everyone around me started laughing too.
“You should see the look on your face!” Axel laughed, slapping his knee. Glock thumped my back again and I grinned. Feeling a rush of relief flooding my body. This was their idea of a joke? They had a pretty twisted sense of humor in that case.
“Welcome home, Gunner,” Axel said and threw open his arms. Glock gave me a push and I walked to Axel and we hugged.
“Your father and brother would be so proud of you. You followed in your brother’s footsteps and served your country like a real man,” Axel said, holding me at a distance like a proud father.
“Yeah, except that Bryce never made it out of there alive,” I said, trying to keep my emotions in check. Axel stopped smiling and then quietly nodded his head.
“Your brother is missed. You know he was our brother. Just like your father was our leader. But you’ve honored their memory. You’ve lived up to their name and now we want to welcome you in,” he said and released my arms.
With my brows crossed, I looked around at the men surrounding me. Glock was standing to my side, beaming happily and with his arms crossed over his chest.
“Welcome me where?” I asked, looking at Axel again.
“Into the club, of course!” he replied and another round of laughter followed.
“I was never a part of this club, Axel. It was always just dad and Bryce,” I said and every time I said my brother’s name; I nearly winced.
“Yes, and now you have to carry on their legacy. Am I right?” Axel said and I glared at him from under my heavy eyelids.
“You have it all wrong, Axel. I don’t know what Glock has been telling you, but being a part of the Bad Disciples was never a part of my plan,” I told him and Axel took in a deep breath. The smile from his face had vanished again. A cold stern look replaced it.
“Glock didn’t have to tell me. I know whose son you are, whose brother…you have their blood running in your veins. You were always meant to be a part of this family,” Axel said and looked around at his men.
I clenched my jaw and stuck my hands into the pockets of my jeans.
“Why do you even want me here?” I asked and Axel was studying my face.
“Because you’re ready, my son. And now you have the military training that we can utilize. What will you do now, Gunner? Get a job bagging groceries? You need to use your skills how your father and brother used theirs before you. Don’t you think that is what they would have wanted for you?” He continued and my brain was working a mile a minute.
Joining the MC that dad and Bryce belonged to was never my plan. Even though I had grown up with its influence around me, I didn’t know how to operate in that environment. Bryce was heavily involved. He was just a few months away from getting patched and being made a full member of the club. He was hoping to be patched before he left for his next tour in Iraq but things didn’t work out like he wanted. I’d stayed away from the club. I wanted an education. I wanted a career. But when Bryce died, everything changed. I felt a need to follow his footsteps in the military, so I enlisted shortly after his funeral. What would he have wanted from me now? I bit back a laugh. He probably would have wanted me to join the club. Axel had brought up a good point.
“We can patch you in right now if you agree, Gunner. Given your lineage, you wouldn’t need to prove yourself during the initiation process. We’ve been waiting for you to return from your tour. We’ve been waiting to have another Alton in the Club. This is what your father would have wanted for all of us,” Axel said and he pinched the flesh on my shoulders with his hands. Then he let me go, stepping back to look at me some more.
“Gunner, you don’t need to think about this. This is your destiny, man,” Glock said beside me and when I looked at him, he had an encouraging expression on his face.
I turned to Axel again and took in a deep breath. When I was younger I had fought to stay away from the club, because of what I thought it would make me become. But now, that I had been to war, and have killed, maybe this was the right path for me. Maybe it was the distraction from my thoughts that I desperately needed.
“Okay, let’s do it,” I said and a cackle of congratulations erupted in the bar. As though all these men were waiting around to hear my response.
People thumped my back, hugs were exchanged and Glock didn’t leave my side. Axel followed my every movement with his watchful eyes as I took steps into my new role as a full member of the Bad Disciples.
“C’mon men, let’s get him patched up,” Axel finally interrupted the celebrations and I nodded. Might as well strike while the iron is hot, I thought.
***
Glock (The Bad Disciples MC Book 4) Page 38