She wouldn’t want him anyway. If she hadn’t wanted him back then, when he was in full health, she certainly wouldn’t want him now. His leg apart, he had acquired a myriad of scars over the last few years, and his sleep, when he did get it, was plagued by nightmares. His lion, always a volatile beast at the best of times, was far too close to the surface these days, and incredibly hard to control. If there wasn’t such a lack of Protectors in their midst right now, he’d have handed his responsibilities over already. He wasn’t at all sure he deserved that title anymore.
With a jerk of his head he indicated to Rebecca to follow him and set off. He told himself he didn’t care one iota whether she did or not, but his lion calmed considerably when she fell into step next to him after a moment’s hesitation. It was only a short walk over to Mrs. H’s cottage. They had converted the barn into a self-contained little flat when Rebecca had come home from London, and she hadn’t moved out yet. From here, she had built a cleaning business that certainly kept her busy, flitting all over the countryside. At least she’d had the good sense to stay off the streets come nightfall.
When she’d first come back, Leon had stalked her from a distance, especially as several of her clients were in the Lakes. Tourists had brought a great boon to the local community, and as far as he could tell Rebecca’s little business was flourishing. Hers wasn’t the only cleaning business, far from it, but she had quickly gained herself a reputation for the personal touch. Her clients weren’t just a money earner to her. She treated each and every one with special care, and she was now reaping the dividends after just two years in the business.
Henry had talked about it all often enough. His pride in his daughter was obvious, and Leon’s chest ached. Fuck, he would miss the old Protector.
They didn’t speak on the way to her place, and that was just fine with him. He wouldn’t have known what to say to her anyway. Her grief wrapped itself around him like a suffocating blanket, and when they reached her front door, he nodded once, all intent to leaving her to it.
“Leon, please.” Her hesitant words were accompanied by the tentative touch of her fingers on his arms and everything inside of Leon stilled. His lion roared and clawed to get out, to touch his mate, and to finish what they had started all those years ago, and he crunched his jaw to stop himself from responding.
“You heard what Mum said, please. We never talked about that night and I need to explain why…”
Her words trailed off and she took a step back when he whirled round and advanced on her. Half shifted he knew he made a terrifying side, as he let his lion out to play. He couldn’t have stopped the animal had he wanted to, and right now, it felt fucking good to let the beast say his piece. Rebecca swallowed hard and stepped back further until her back made contact with the wall, and Leon slapped his clawed hands either side of her head. They screeched through the stone, and Rebecca winced, when he grabbed her hair and tilting her head sideways ran his canines along her neck. Her heartbeat went wild, and he wanted nothing more than to sink his teeth into her flesh and to force the connection between them. It hadn’t dimmed, far from it. It had just grown stronger over the years, and no matter how many willing pussies he’d sunk his dick in, there was only one woman he truly wanted and that was the one who ran her hands over his torso. The way she traced the line of his scars over the fabric of his shirt felt way too good, almost soothing, as she left a trail of fire behind, and Leon groaned in her neck. His cock hardened and he inhaled deeply of her scent, before he forced himself to step away.
“Please, Leon, at least let me heal you. Please…”
Fuck, the way she pleaded, her tear-stained brown eyes connecting with his, it made his stone-cold heart melt. No matter what he told himself he loved this woman, and if she threw all of this back in his face tomorrow, he knew he couldn’t just walk away.
“There’s no need. My leg will heal.” He ground the words out through clenched teeth, and fire sparked from Rebecca’s eyes. It was the darndest thing to witness, as though she was channeling her powers like Mrs. H did, but Rebecca didn’t have those powers, did she?
“There is every need. I can sense the evil magic inside that break. It’s that fucking vamp. The same thing happened to Dad, when Mum met him. It’s why you’re not healing as you should. Please, let me help. It’s the least I can do, and if you want to walk away after that, then fine, I won’t stop you, but, please, let me do this. Sir, please?”
It was the Sir that did him in. To hear it from her lips…it was too much, and with a tight nod he relented. His lion roared his agreement and Rebecca ducked under his arms and unlocked her door. He didn’t miss the way her fingers trembled, and it took her several attempts to even get the key in the lock. He was a right bastard for letting her struggle, he knew that, but he also knew that if he touched her, if he let down the barriers he’d erected around his heart, there would be no going back. He was playing with fire just being here.
Rebecca finally managed to get that door open and he followed her through. Her scent was everywhere, and he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was walking to his fucking doom.
Chapter Eight
Rebecca’s heart beat so fast, she wasn’t sure how she managed to make it into her flat. It was tiny, but it was hers, and completely self-sufficient. She hastily snatched her bra off the dining chair, and indicated for Leon to sit down. He did so slowly after a long considering look she couldn’t decipher.
The bed would have been more comfortable for him, but she didn’t think he would want to go near that, and sure enough the way he scowled at her frilly bedspread told volumes.
“Stay there, I’m just gonna wash my hands, and put the kettle on,” she said, and Leon shook his head.
“No need, this isn’t a fucking social call. I don’t need tea and biscuits. You said you can heal my leg, so do it already, and then I’m off, or was that just more bullshit designed to get me back here.”
The words stung and ripped all the wounds in Rebecca’s heart wide open. She couldn’t stop her soft gasp of anguish, and Leon’s head whipped up. The ice in his normally so warm eyes made her rub her arms to chase the goose bumps away, and they stared at each other for the longest time. Even with his scowl and his frosty demeanor he still looked utterly edible to her. Probably more so, because he screamed bad boy. She’d heard of his exploits.
It seemed her decision all those years ago, had had long-reaching consequences. The easygoing Leon had disappeared, and in his place was a somewhat cynical, arrogant man who took his pleasures where he found them. None of the women he bedded had a bad thing to say about him, in fact they usually wanted more, but he never fucked the same woman twice. He didn’t do relationships it seemed, which had always kind of reassured her in a rather perverse way. Rebecca didn’t think she could have coped with him settling down and playing the happy-ever-after game with someone else, which was incredibly selfish of her, but he was hers, damn it. If only she could get him to give her another chance.
“What?” he finally said. “Did you expect me to just forgive and forget? You had your chance, and you blew it. I’m not that love-struck idiot anymore.”
Rebecca blinked away tears and his harsh features softened slightly, before he seemed to catch himself, and the hard mask came back down again. It had been such a fleeting moment, Rebecca would have thought she’d imagined it, but her heart jumped about like a demented rabbit. Truly, he wouldn’t have even shown that glimmer of emotion, if he didn’t care for her at least a little, still?
“I never thought of you as any kind of idiot, Sir.”
His lion’s growl shook the floor, and she took an involuntary step back at the sheer fury that emanated from him.
“Do not call me that, girl.”
Rebecca flinched under his glare, but she was determined to have this out with him once and for all.
“Why not? It’s the title you deserve, and I’m just showing my respect, Sir.”
She bowed her head and waited f
or the outburst that never came.
Instead, Leon sighed, and out of the corners of her eyes she saw his hands fists in a white knuckled grip.
“Shame you couldn’t show me that respect eight years ago, when you filled your father’s head full of lies.”
Rebecca had no answer for that, so she simply shook her head, and his lion growled again.
“No, you didn’t? Well, fuck me. I think I would remember taking your fucking virtue, for what it was worth then or since.”
That made her head shoot up, and she glared at him.
“How dare you. That’s so not fair. You know damn well I’d never had sex until that night. I barely kissed any guys, so—”
His short laugh stopped her, as he looked her up and down.
“Spare me. I’m not sure I can believe a word that comes out of your mouth. Regardless of the circumstances, or your dubious virtue, I was your friend, and I thought that meant something to you at least. Yet you repaid that friendship by what…lying your fucking mouth off to get out of a predicament of your own foolish making, and for what? Turns out your parents knew the truth anyway, and from what I can gather you’ve fucked up your powers by pulling that stunt, so…” He rose to standing, and the little groan he gave in doing so, reinforced the well of misery Rebecca was in now. “Clearly you will not be able to heal me, so I’m off.”
Without thinking she scrambled to get in front of him and placed her hands on his hard chest. Instantly her palms heated, and power surged through her with such intensity that it took her breath away. That had never happened before, and she closed her eyes and absorbed the strange sensations flowing through her. Leon swore under his breath and then flung her hands off him. The action made her open her eyes, and he frowned at her.
“What the fuck was that?” he asked, and she shook her head.
“I…I don’t know. It’s never happened before, but I’m even more convinced that I can heal your leg now. Please let me try.”
Leon’s gaze grew so intense that she was half expecting to spontaneously combust or something, but whatever he saw in her expression seemed to reassure him that she was speaking the truth, because he gave another curt nod. She was beginning to hate those.
“Fine, go ahead and try, but even if you succeed, it won’t change anything. I still don’t trust you.”
Rebecca swallowed past the lump in her throat that made talking difficult, and when she did manage to get the words out, they were barely above a whisper.
“Fine, I understand that, and I guess I deserve it too, but I want you to know that I’ve regretted my decision ten times over since then.”
He smirked at that, and she rushed on to explain.
“And not just because of what happened to my powers, either. I know I hurt you that night, and I can only say I’m sorry. I was a foolish and confused young girl, frightened stiff of the feelings I was developing for you. It all happened so damn fast, and I knew that if I stayed, if I allowed you to, to… well…” She ran out of words and wrapped her arms around herself to stop the shivers that started from her toes, and threatened to engulf her. It always happened when she thought back to that night, and the way he’d looked at her, before he’d shifted, and disappeared out of her life.
It was the same look he wore now. Intense, alert, hurt, his expressive eyes switching from his beast’s to the one of the man and back again.
“If you allowed me to do what?” he asked, and his voice dropped an octave. It send shivers of arousal through her body this time, and her breathing hitched when he grasped her chin, so that she had no choice but to look up at him. “Answer, me girl.”
Rebecca licked her dry lips and a slow rumble rose from Leon’s chest. His hold on her tightened and his nostrils flared as he inhaled.
“I was afraid that if I let you claim me, I wouldn’t want to leave, and I had so many plans.” That rumble turned into a full-grown growl, and he flashed her a toothy smile, as his lion took over.
“In other words you didn’t trust me at all.” The words came out distorted in his anger, and Rebecca tried to shake her head, but the hold he had on her made that impossible.
“No, it’s not that, never that. I didn’t trust myself.”
Leon made a disgusted sound in the back of his throat, and pushed her away. It made her heart break all over again.
“Bullshit, you clearly didn’t know me at all, if you thought I’d have stopped you from doing what you needed to do. That was never my intention, and for what it’s worth, I had no intention of claiming you then. You were far too young for my…needs.” She glanced up at him when he hesitated, and the self-depreciating smile that played round his lips was reminiscent of the old Leon. The boy she had fallen in love with long before she knew what that emotion was. Long before he’d grown into a man and her teenage self hadn’t known what to do with the intensity of her changed feelings toward him. He reached out to her, and twirled a strand of her hair in his fingers.
It was curiously intimate moment, especially as he once again looked ready to kill someone, and she didn’t dare breathe, afraid to break the moment. His gaze seemed riveted on the action of his digits, and when he finally looked at her, the pain she glimpsed in his eyes brought her to her emotional knees.
“Aren’t you going to ask me what those needs were?” he murmured and she drew in a much needed breath as her lungs reminded her they needed some air.
“I should think they’re the same as they are now, Sir.”
His gaze grew heated and acting on instinct Rebecca sunk to her knees in front of him, and tentatively placed her hands on his thighs. He didn’t let go of her hair, so the action yanked her head up, and her scalp burned for the few seconds it took him to release her. Leon sat back down on the chair with a heavy thump, and his muscles flexed under her hands. He didn’t shake her off, however, just swore under his breath and ran a hand through his hair.
Silence fell between them once more, heavy and oppressive, and Rebecca shut her eyes and concentrated on his leg instead. She couldn’t really assess the full damage not without skin-on-skin contact, and when she opened her eyes to look up at him, it was to find him watching her.
“What do you think you know about my needs?” he asked, and her heartbeat sped up to dangerous levels again. “Been listening to rumors?”
It was on the tip of her tongue to say no, but if she wanted to regain his trust, then she had to be brutally honest, starting now.
“Are you saying they’re not true?” She gave him a tentative smile when he looked taken aback by her answer, and continued. “I’ve been trying to find out as much as I can about you, since I came back. If the rumor mills are to be believed you’ve bedded every female in the county over the age of consent.” Her voice caught on that last bit, the red-hot poker of jealousy branding her insides, and his eyes narrowed.
“Hardly,” he said, and she breathed a sigh of relief. “I do have some standards.”
“Oh.” Rebecca inwardly rolled her eyes at that inane sound, and Leon gave her a grim smile.
“There have been a few, I give you that. Probably not as many as claim to have been with me, in their effort to tame me.” He shrugged his shoulders, and slowly extended his bad leg. His mouth set in a thin line, as he did so.
“What they don’t get is that I don’t need taming. I certainly don’t do relationships, and flowers, and loved up words. Now if you’re looking for some hot sex of the kinky, if not to say depraved variety, I’m your man. Fuck ’em and leave them. That’s my new motto.”
Rebecca couldn’t help her flinch at his harsh words, and he gave a short laugh.
“Yeah, still think you know what I need, pipsqueak?” It hurt to hear him call her by her old pet name and Rebecca squared her shoulders and looked up at him.
“Yes, I do, if you’d let me. I think you’re hiding behind this tough persona, because you’re afraid of getting hurt again, and I get that. I’m sorry, so sorry for having been the cause of that, and—”
“Don’t flatter yourself, girl, and spare me the psychoanalysis. I don’t need fixing, and last time I checked you majored in business, not psychology.”
Rebecca ignored the sarcastic comment, pulled a fortifying breath deep into her lungs, and continued.
“Like I said, I am sorry. I’m not that girl anymore. I know I’ll have to prove that to you, starting right now with your leg, so please, Sir, take off your trousers. I need to get my hands on your skin.”
“You’ve got be to fucking kidding me.”
* * * *
Leon’s lion prowled under his skin, and the blood rushed in his ears, but seeing Rebecca kneel between his legs like that…fuck, it was damn hot, and every erotic dream he’d ever had about her paled into insignificance. She meant what she said, he could sense that. Not an ounce of deceit came from her, just a grim determination, and the heavy scent of need.
He’d sensed that submissive streak in her back then, but she’d also fought against it tooth and nail. Now, however, she seemed to embrace it, and the dominant in him tapped into that, and rose to the forefront. She was right, of course, she was not that girl anymore, just like he wasn’t that boy, and that’s all he had been back then, really. With the passage of time came experience and hindsight was wonderful.
He should have pulled her up on her stunt, made her admit the truth back then, but his hurt pride hadn’t let him. By the time he had calmed down enough to seek her out, she had left to go back to London to start her University course. Through her local district Protector, he’d heard all about her exploits. He didn’t need to rely on the rumor mill. He knew exactly how many men she had been with, and while parts of him had rejoiced when she’d found her way into the lifestyle, another part of him had wanted to rip the experienced Dom who’d trained her apart with his bare hands. The tiger shifter was a decent guy, but, fuck, he’d wanted to be the one to train her. It should have been him, just as it should have been him who took her virginity.
Her Lion Protector [The Protectors 3] (Siren Publishing Allure) Page 7