Blair leans her head back on the couch and sighs. “I don’t see how that’s possible.”
After they leave, Sachi struggling with Fiona’s heavy Louis Vuitton suitcases, Blair thinks about how her condo used to be this peaceful sanctuary. Everything tidy and perfect. But maybe too perfect. She thinks back to how she resented Nathan’s intrusion in the beginning, resented those globs of toothpaste in the sink, crumbs on the kitchen counter, the way he forced himself into her life, but now that’s all changed.
She’d give anything to have him back.
Nathan stares out the airplane window, watching the clouds and wishing he were somewhere else—anywhere. He’s already told Fiona he’ll do this last talk show in San Francisco and then he’s done. No more talk shows, no more book signings, no more anything. Of course, she balked, but he didn’t care.
Just can’t deal with this shit right now.
Fiona crosses her legs, sighing loudly as she studies her phone. “It just so happens, I know the entire story with you and Blair.” She looks up at him over her reading glasses. “In case you’re interested.”
Nathan doesn’t respond, hoping if he ignores her she’ll shut up.
“Sachi and I went by to pick up my luggage, and Blair told us everything.”
“When was this?”
“Yesterday.”
He goes back to looking out the window. Should probably get his computer out, but doesn’t feel like it. Hasn’t felt like doing much lately.
Fiona lets out a dramatic sigh. “I admit, I was surprised by what she told me.”
“Look, I don’t want to talk about Blair.”
“I don’t blame you. Not at all, especially after what happened. If I were you, I wouldn’t want to talk about her, either!”
Nathan nods, still gazing out the window. Even someone as self-involved as Fiona can understand how what Blair did was unforgivable. “It cut deep,” he admits. “I’ll say that much.”
Unfortunately, he still can’t stop thinking about Blair. As much as he tries, she’s on his mind day and night. Constantly. And what’s more, his emotions are all over the map. Keep going back and forth between hurt, anger, and betrayal. Can’t settle on which one to feel the most.
“Blair’s been torturing herself over this whole thing. Seriously,” Fiona tells him, shifting around to get more comfortable in her seat. “She’s torturing herself over something that’s clearly your fault!”
Nathan’s whips his head around from the window. “My fault?” he stares at her, incredulous. “How the hell do you figure that?”
She shrugs. “It’s obvious, isn’t it? You had a condom and didn’t use it.”
Nathan’s brows go up with surprise. So Blair really did tell Fiona the whole story.
“She lied about being on the pill. Or did she conveniently leave that part out? Christ,” he mutters. “Can’t believe I’m even discussing this with you.”
Fiona laughs. “She lied about the pill? Are you kidding me?”
“No, I’m not.”
“Oh, my fucking God! Did Blair force you to have sex with her at gunpoint?”
“Keep your voice down.” He glances around the plane, certain every person within earshot is enjoying this conversation.
“Well, did she? Because then I’d say it was her fault.”
“Course not.”
“And apparently you’ve never heard of something called ‘safe sex’? Because it sounds to me like you decided to skip protection all on your own.”
Nathan presses his lips together, and his eyes flash back to the window. In truth, this is where it all starts to fall apart for him a bit, too. Clearly neither of them were thinking along those lines that night. He knows why Blair lied about the pill, but he wasn’t exactly eager to wear a rubber himself. Pretty sure he was relieved about not having to wear one.
He snorts. “None of this changes the fact that she’s been lying to me. Christ, I married her and changed my whole life because of a lie.”
“My God, you’re an idiot!” She gawks at him. “I can’t even believe how much.”
“Fuck off, Fiona.”
“In fact, is there a stronger word I can use than idiot? Because that’s what I need right now. You’re a writer, so surely you must know some?”
“Fuck. Off. How about those two words?”
She smirks. “You disappoint me, Nathan.”
“Good.”
“You should see how messy Blair’s condo is,” Fiona tells him, the two of them standing backstage at the television show in San Francisco, where Nathan’s waiting to go on the air. A makeup artist just put some kind of powder on his face, and he can only hope he doesn’t look ridiculous.
“What are you talking about? Place was spotless last time I saw it.”
“Not anymore. Apparently, Blair has let it go.”
“She has?” He’s been trying not to listen to all of Fiona’s incessant chatter about Blair, but finds he can’t help himself. “How messy is it?”
Fiona snorts. “Worse than when I lived there.”
“That’s impossible.”
There’s no way Blair would let things get that out of control. In truth, he misses Blair’s tidy ways. How relaxing he found that about her. Sure, it could get out of hand when she was in a state, upset about something, but overall he appreciated it.
Staying with Brody has been the opposite, too much like what he grew up with—chaos. Granted, Brody is a guy and not married, but Jesus Christ, his refrigerator looks like it hasn’t been cleaned out since the nineties. He’s actually worried about getting food poisoning for real.
“Her condo is basically a pigsty,” Fiona tells him. “And she doesn’t look any better herself, either. My God, she’s so pale. Ghostly. She needs to pull it together and at least put on some makeup.” Fiona puts a hand on her hip. “Even with a broken heart, I had my standards!”
Nathan’s always thought Blair looked pretty without makeup, and obviously thinks her pale skin is beautiful. He frowns, though. Doesn’t like a single thing he’s hearing.
A broken heart. So Blair’s heart is broken?
What about my heart?
Truth is he’s been having a rough time of it. Hasn’t slept in days. Feels like shit. Can’t stop thinking about everything that happened between them. How could she have lied for so long? Kept a secret like that? He hates secrets. Claims she loved him for years, but what kind of love is that? The kind where you trick someone into getting you pregnant and marrying you?
What do I care if Blair’s heart is broken? She deserves it.
After what she did to me.
I trusted her completely. First time I ever trusted a woman like that.
Turns out she’s been lying to me all along and right to my face. And to think I actually felt guilty all these years for sleeping with her and getting her pregnant.
Reflecting over what Fiona just told him, though, he has to admit he’s concerned. Blair letting her place go? Living with a mess? Doesn’t sound like her at all. Hard to even imagine her okay with that.
And then there’s the other thing that’s been on his mind. When he closes his eyes, he sees the same thing every time. The two of them together that night in Isadora. Blair on top, him moving inside her, so good, watching her, and it’s what happened next that won’t leave him alone. The way she looked at him when she came.
Never seen anything like it before in my life.
It’s been torturing him. That expression on her face. He’s seen it when they were together since then, too, but that first time, there was something about it.
Like it’s the key to unlocking everything.
BLAIR GOES OVER to Tori’s after work the next day to babysit the boys, finally telling her what happened.
“I can’t believe you didn’t call me!” Tori grabs Blair, hugging her. “Why didn’t you let me know? I would have come over.”
“I don’t want to put you in the middle of this. I’m worried if Nathan finds
out you knew the truth all along, he’ll be angry with you.”
Tori scoffs. “Are you kidding? I don’t care if my brother finds out I knew. It wasn’t my secret to tell.”
“I suppose.”
“I’m surprised he hasn’t called me, though. He must be staying with Brody. If he were at my mom’s, she would have said something.”
Blair sits on the couch, where the boys are all gathering around her, tails wagging. She thinks back to how she fed them goulash that night with Nathan. That wonderful night. It turned out he was right about those deadly farts, though. They didn’t start until the next morning, but they lasted all day and were so toxic that even Tori agreed the dogs needed to stay outside in the yard until the stench left, and they could all breathe again.
“You look terrible,” Tori says, sitting next to her. “Did you go to work today?”
“I had to. I can’t call in sick two days in a row.” Natalie had coddled her all day, everybody at the bakery being super nice. Though, Blair still had to go hide in the bathroom to cry.
“I’m going to call off volunteering tonight.” Tori grabs her phone off the coffee table. “I’m not leaving you alone.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“No, and ugh.” Tori rolls her eyes. “Not again. I thought I was done with him.”
“What is it? Don’t tell me it’s Chase.”
Tori nods. “I haven’t heard from him in a while.”
“I told Nathan about him harassing you.” Blair goes quiet as she thinks back to that night again. The night he said he loved me. Her eyes sting with tears and she closes them.
Tori scrolls through her phone messages. “I told him Chase lost interest.” She lets out a breath. “Guess I was wrong.”
“Maybe you should call the police and let them handle it.”
“No, he’s just a young guy who’s full of himself. I don’t think he’s used to women telling him no, so he thinks I’m playing hard to get. I’ll have Road talk to him. It’ll be fine.”
She spends the rest of the evening at Tori’s, the two of them watching chick flicks and eating junk food. Blair cries and tells Tori about the whole scene that happened at her parents’ house in her old bedroom.
“My brother really is a dipshit.” Tori shakes her head, handing her tissues. “Like he’s so perfect.”
“It’s all my fault, though.” Blair tells her about the Sanskrit over Nathan’s heart. “I had no idea it mattered so much to him. I always thought he was secretly relieved about what happened. Turns out I was completely wrong.”
Tori eyes fill with sympathy. “Yes, you were wrong, but I think it’s time you both put it behind you. You’ve suffered enough.”
Kiki’s wedding is on a Saturday. Blair stays late Friday at La Dolce Vita and bakes the three tiers for the chocolate cake then assembles it early the next morning. It’s an elaborate cake with more than fifty sugar-art flowers. Ginger and Carlos help her deliver it to the reception, which is being held in a mansion north of Seattle. There is an assortment of cupcakes, too, with more sugar flowers.
Afterward, she rushes back home to get ready for the wedding, barely arriving on time before the ceremony. Kiera and Brody are sitting about halfway down the crowded church and wave her over.
“Hey, you’re late. We worried you weren’t going to make it,” Kiera says to Blair as they scoot over to let her in.
“I was just setting up the cake. It took a while.” Blair nods hello to Brody, who gives her a nervous grin.
There’s a very attractive woman sitting next to Brody who she’s never seen before. She’s about Blair’s age with long, brown hair highlighted gold in the front. The woman stares at her with narrow brown eyes, and Blair gives her a brief smile, though the woman doesn’t smile back.
Voices come from the rear of the church and then the groom, Austin, along with all the groomsmen make their way to the front getting ready for the ceremony.
Nathan is one of them. Blair spots him immediately and she can’t pull her eyes away. A mixture of pleasure and pain rushes through her at the sight of him. She hasn’t seen him since the night at her parents’ house. He’s wearing a dark suit, crisp white shirt, blue tie, and as she imagined, he looks devastatingly handsome in a suit. His blond hair contrasts perfectly with the dark fabric.
It’s been two weeks and she misses him. Misses every single thing about him. Even the things that used to annoy her.
The men line up, waiting with Austin in front. One of the other groomsmen is talking to Nathan, and as Nathan bends his head slightly, listening, his eyes scan the church.
Blair’s heart stops when they find her. Time is suspended as they stare at each other. Her mouth opens, and there’s a flicker of something intense on Nathan’s face, but then his expression turns to stone.
He looks away.
Blair blinks, feels her throat go tight and tries to pull herself together. She thinks about the video Fiona sent her the day after his interview in San Francisco.
It was horrible.
The complete opposite of how he was during his interview here and in Portland. Totally wooden, barely answered the interviewer’s questions, and making it painfully clear he didn’t want to be there. Fiona was furious afterward.
Blair only felt guiltier.
The irony is that Edge of Zen is still riding high. It hit number three on The New York Times best sellers last week and is doing well everywhere. Though apparently, Nathan has gone into hiding, according to Fiona. All Tori could confirm was that he’s been staying with Brody.
Organ music flows through the church, and everyone turns and watches as each bridesmaid makes her way down the aisle. When it’s Tori’s turn, she looks pretty carrying a bouquet of pink flowers, her hair shiny and long, flowing down her back. Marla comes next, looking deeply tan, wearing her usual superior smirk. Finally, the familiar opening to Wagner’s “Bridal Chorus” begins and the bride is there, too, smiling nervously at everyone. She’s being walked down the aisle by Lori and a man she assumes is Kiki’s dad, though Blair has never seen him before. Blair hasn’t seen much of Kiki as an adult, but still feels an obligation toward her since she was around her quite a bit when they were growing up. She remembers babysitting her with Tori lots of times.
The church is mostly quiet as everyone watches the ceremony. Oddly, Blair can sense the woman sitting next to Brody staring at her. Finally, Blair looks at her, but the woman turns her head away.
Blair wonders who she could be. She doesn’t recognize her as any family member. Considers maybe she’s with Austin’s family, but why would she be sitting with Brody and Kiera?
As Blair’s trying to figure this out, the woman glances at her again and while her look isn’t exactly hostile, it’s not friendly, either.
Blair scans what she’s wearing—a tight red dress, four-inch strappy heels, chandelier earrings. She’s gorgeous, but her clothes are more appropriate for a night club than a wedding.
Who is she?
After the ceremony, everyone goes out front to blow bubbles at the bride and groom who get into a white stretch limousine. There’s no sign of Nathan anywhere and that woman is gone, but Kiera comes over to ask Blair if she needs a ride to the reception.
“Thanks, but I drove here myself.”
“Okay, just thought I’d ask. Brody and I are going to head over now.”
Blair nods and is ready to go, but then decides to ask Kiera about that woman. “Who was that sitting next to Brody during the ceremony? I didn’t recognize her.”
Kiera gets a pained expression on her face. “She’s with Nathan.”
“What?”
“Yeah,” Kiera says, pushing back some of her blonde curls from where the wind is blowing them around. “She’s from Spain, arrived a few days ago. I just met her this morning.”
Blair swallows, sick to her stomach.
“She’s staying at a hotel downtown.” Kiera puts her hand on Blair’s arm. “Are you okay? I know you and Nathan b
roke up. I’m so sorry. I don’t even understand what happened.”
“I’m okay. I can’t talk about it right now.”
Kiera nods with sympathy. “All right. I’ll see you at the reception.”
Blair watches Kiera go over to Brody then heads out to her own car—the Honda. Once inside, Blair sits there. Doesn’t move. Can barely breathe.
So that’s Sonia.
Nathan must have asked her to fly out. That was fast. Apparently, he couldn’t wait to get back together with her.
Blair closes her eyes to fight off tears. Tells herself it doesn’t matter, which obviously isn’t true, but she doesn’t know what else to do. More than anything, she wishes she could just go home. Get in bed. Sleep until her heart doesn’t hurt anymore.
Instead, she starts the car and drives toward the reception. She doesn’t have much choice. Her cake is there, and she’s expected to be there, too.
The party is already going full swing when she arrives, which isn’t a big surprise. If Nathan’s family is good at one thing, it’s partying. Austin’s family seems to be the same, so between the two of them, there’s a lot of alcohol flowing.
Her cake is along the back wall and she goes over to inspect it. They haven’t cut it yet, and it’s still holding up well.
“The cake looks amazing!” Kiki says, coming up to give her a hug. “Everybody’s been raving about it. Thank you so much!”
“You’re welcome.” Blair smiles.
They talk about the ceremony a little bit and how Kiki and Austin are planning to drive down the Oregon coast for their honeymoon.
There’s some commotion on stage and it looks like the band is setting up, so Kiki leaves to speak with them.
Blair grabs a glass of wine and searches around for Tori, wishing she could just leave. Finally, she sees Tori with her mom, who Blair discovers is already drunk and talking loudly.
“I think you need to have a seat, Mom,” Tori is saying to her, holding her mom’s arm.
“I’m fine. Let go of me! It’s that jackass’s fault. What kind of asshole walks out on his woman the day of her daughter’s wedding?”
Return of the Jerk (Sweet Life in Seattle, Book 2) Page 34