by Joya Ryan
Jenna threw up her hands. “I’m ashamed of me!”
A sob broke low in her throat and Colt’s eyes went wide. Tears threatened to spill, but Jenna clenched her teeth, refusing to cry in front of him.
“I know where I come from and everyone else does too. And I can’t outrun the truth of that. The truth of what I am.” A single tear danced along her lower lashes and she said the one thing she’d never said out loud before. The one thing she never wanted to admit. “I’m trash, Colt. No matter how hard I try…I can’t escape that.”
“No,” Colt said roughly. He opened his mouth, but nothing else came out. Just another “No.” As if disciplining a toddler for touching something breakable.
She searched his face, looking for any sign of what he might be thinking, when the truth hit her like a falling brick to the skull.
There she stood, staring down a man she was falling for, and neither of them had any idea how to deal with this kind of emotion. The only thing left to do was turn around and walk away.
Chapter Thirteen
Summer nights in Diamond used to be Colt’s favorite time. The smell of burgers being grilled and the distant sound of souped-up trucks hauling down dirt roads.
It felt like home.
From the door of Penny’s BBQ, he could see the red roof of the elementary school down the block and he thought of Jenna. Her life was here. Which meant that if he wanted her for longer than the summer, it’d have to be here. What was crazy was that Colt’s mind didn’t immediately reject the idea of setting down roots in Diamond.
He walked inside and sat down at the bar.
“Wanna talk about it?” Huck asked, fingers curled around a longneck.
“Nothing to talk about.”
“Come on, man, you’ve been moping around all day, not yourself. What’s going on with you? Itching to get back on the circuit?”
Colt let out a long breath and rested his forearms on the bar counter. Truth was, he wasn’t thinking about the circuit or his career. At all.
“What can I get you?” Penny asked.
“I’ll have what he’s having. Thanks, Pen.”
She winked, popped the top off a beer, slid it to Colt, and went to take the order of other men down the bar.
“Stressed about money with you being out?” Huck asked.
Colt laughed and took a swig of his beer. “No, man.”
He had being riding a long time and made a damn good living doing what he did. Thanks to smart investing and simple living, he had enough liquid funds to retire tomorrow.
No, the issue bothering Colt was much bigger than money.
I’m ashamed of me.
He replayed Jenna’s words over and over. Saw the broken, defeated look on her face. And all he had said was no. Jesus, what kind of moron was he? He wanted to argue with her. To tell her she was smart and amazing and fucking sexy as hell. That she was better than most women. But she had caught him so off guard that all he could do was disagree with her perception of herself. Because it was so wildly untrue.
Colt hadn’t been able to get it out of his mind. How the hell could she ever feel that way about herself? Colt knew why, and it made him want to strangle Jenna’s mother for giving her daughter that kind of self-loathing complex.
“So what’s the problem?”
“Since when have you gotten so chatty, Huck?”
He shrugged. “Your mood is killing mine. Repelling all the chicks. Buck up or I’m flying stag from here on out.”
Of course. Huck was one to think long-term—’course, long-term for him was sunset to sunrise. He was worse than Colt. Ryder and Sebastian had always been the responsible ones. Colt and Huck liked to tear it up and get crazy now and again.
“I know you don’t like talking about your parents, but if you want to…” Huck trailed off and Colt kind of laughed.
“You know what’s weird, I was actually thinking about a woman.” He took a swig of his beer. “And you’re right, I don’t like talking about my parents, but for some reason, thinking of them isn’t as hard as it used to be.”
“So this woman, she’s making you remember the good stuff?”
Colt looked at his friend. “Something like that. She’s making me…try.”
Huck nodded. “Well, that sounds like the foundation of a healthy relationship.”
Colt’s throat burned because he damn near just choked. “What?”
“I read in one of those lady magazines that solid relationships are built on trust and something else.”
“Why the hell were you reading a lady magazine?”
“It was the only thing in the waiting room when I went to see Lily for stitches in my hand the other day. Damn nail gun got away from me. Oh, friendship!” Huck snapped his finger. “It was friendship. The best relationships come from being friends first. You know what that means?”
Colt’s eyes went wide and Huck gave one of shit-eating grins. He was caught—
“It means your sister and I are destined to hook up. You think she’ll go out with me?”
Colt slugged Huck in the arm, but he only laughed. “I’m kidding. Kissing Lily would be like kissing my own sister. But you should have seen your face!”
“Don’t talk about kissing my sister,” Colt grumbled. Good God, he was going to have a heart attack. Despite Huck being a dick with his jokes, maybe he and his lady magazine were right. Maybe the best relationships did come from friendships.
“You need to lighten up, Colt. Maybe get out of town for a few days. Clear your head,” Huck said. “This place can feel suffocating at times. Getting away from everyone and everything can be good for you.”
Colt’s eyes snapped wide. “Jesus Christ, Huck, you’re a genius!”
Colt laid money down on the bar, grabbed his keys, and burst out the door, barely hearing Huck yell something like, “Anytime, bro.”
…
Jenna stared at her laptop and groaned. She’d looked over the grant proposal so many times she was going cross-eyed. She had also read over the job description, rules and regulations, and all the personal bios of each school board member.
She snapped her computer shut, took off her glasses, and rubbed her nose. There was a knock on the door. She glanced at the clock: eight thirty.
She opened the door and her mouth dropped when she saw Colt standing on her stoop, his truck idling in her driveway. “Jenna Justice, you are amazing and beautiful and smart and I want you to come with me.”
“What?” Her heart stopped at least twice during his admission. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything is fine.” He stepped through her door, forcing her to move back and let him enter. “Come away with me. Just for a few days.”
“Colt, I don’t know.”
“JJ, you’re not trash. I should have said all those things before but I was so shocked because I don’t understand how you can’t see what I see.” He tucked a stray curl behind her ear. “I’m sorry for the shit you had to deal with and still have to deal with today. But if you give me a few days, I’ll do my damnedest to show you what I see in you.”
Oxygen was nowhere to be found. Or maybe she just had a hard time breathing because her brain was foggy and her lungs burning. Colt had just verbally delivered a boot to the chest and her heart was equal parts happy and hurting. But she couldn’t really just pick up and leave…could she? Actually, she could. If she wanted to, that is. The school board meeting was still two weeks away and school had just ended. She had plenty of time to prep for the next year still.
“Where?”
Colt smiled. “Not far. I just—” He gripped the bill of his ball cap, which Jenna was learning he did when he was nervous. “I think some space from all this would be good for us.”
“Us?” She raised a brow but immediately felt bad for her tone. Colt didn’t seem deterred.
“Yeah. Us.” He flicked her under the chin and unleashed a smile so sexy she about puddled between the floorboards. “Look, we have a lot of st
uff going on. I’m not great at all this—” He waved his hand over her body.
She smiled. “Actually, it’s been my experience that you’re very good at all this.” She mimicked his previous hand action.
His eyes blazed. “I was talking about the relationship part, but if I can catch on half as well as I did to your little moans, then, sugar, I’ll be a master in no time.”
He winked.
Something girlie and giddy rose in Jenna’s throat, and she couldn’t help but feel like she was a teenager again, staring at the dreamy rebel who was currently attempting to whisk her away.
“I’m sorry I got mad earlier,” Colt said seriously.
“Don’t be. I asked you to talk and you did. You were being honest.” She gazed up at him. “Are we making up now?”
He grinned. “Making up? Don’t you have to break up first? And wait…” Colt looked at the ceiling and ran his fingers through his stubble. “Don’t you have to be together before you can break up?”
Jenna pursed her lips. Colt smiled victoriously. “I’ll be damned. The no-strings Miss Justice is thinking about something more.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
She rolled her eyes. He was worse than her students.
His hands closed around her hips. “Come away with me. If for no other reason than because I want you. Alone. To myself. I want a chance, a real chance, to see you.”
Colt’s words hit something deep in her soul. She couldn’t be herself in Diamond. Not right now and not with Colt. Maybe once this whole after-school program was going and Jenna was voted in for the job, she could consider dating Colt—
There she went again. With the “maybes” and “considering.” The thing she loved about Colt was, despite what he thought, he didn’t push her. He simply urged her to say her thoughts aloud.
She didn’t want to give up on her dreams. She wanted to teach and head up that program. But she wanted Colt too. “Okay.”
His eyes widened. “Really?”
“Yeah.”
She barely got the last word out before Colt yanked on her arm and hauled her to his truck.
“Wait! I need to pack. I don’t even know where we’re going. And I need to lock up.”
“None doing. You can call Lily and have her swing by to lock up, and you don’t need anything. Got it all covered.”
“What? That’s not possible. At least let me get a change of clothes and my toothbrush.”
Colt opened the passenger side and lifted her into his truck. “Nope. Covered.”
“But what are we going to tell everyone? Lily will figure it out when we’re both gone.”
“We’ll figure that out later. But she loves us both.”
Colt was right—Lily would never sell them out. She may not be thrilled, but for now, she’d take Colt’s outlook and just deal with that later.
When he walked around and climbed in behind the wheel Jenna couldn’t help but smile. “Why are you being so antsy?”
He put the truck in reverse and looked at her before backing up. “Sugar, I just got you to say yes. No way am I going to press my luck and give you a chance to change your mind.”
Chapter Fourteen
As soon as Colt cleared the Diamond city limits and passed the Come Back Real Soon sign, ease settled over him and excitement flared.
JJ looked at him and smiled. God, that smile. He could almost see that invisible rope she wore around herself disappear and the fun, happy, carefree girl shine through.
’Course, ditching her seat belt, tossing her glasses on the dash, and climbing through the back cab window into the bed of the truck also tipped him off.
“Woman, what are you doing?” Colt laughed when she pounded on the top of the cab from the outside.
“Turn up this song!”
He did. She started swaying. Her hands stretched out to the sides, letting the wind blow her hair free. Colt stole as many glances as he could through the rearview mirror. She was a vision. In that moment, he realized how hard it must be to feel trapped inside your own skin.
She climbed back through with a breathy sigh, running her fingers though all that hair.
“What has gotten into you?” When he glanced between JJ and the road he noticed her gaze was fixed on him.
“You.” She slid over, cupped his cheek, and buried her face in her neck, delivering small kisses along his jaw. “You’ve gotten into me. I don’t know how to explain it, and right now, I don’t want to try.”
He groaned because right then her tongue darted out to taste his skin. He wrapped his right arm around her while keeping his left hand on the top of the steering wheel. “It seems all I need to do is give you wide open space.”
She looked up at him, her expression so trusting. Like taking her for a ride out of town in his dusty truck somehow made him a hero. It was that look that did strange things to his chest. He would do anything if it meant she’d stare at him like that for the rest of the summer—hell, maybe even longer.
“Right now, right here, no one can see me or judge me. I just…I feel lighter. Like for a minute, I’m just Jenna and nothing else. Not Miranda’s daughter. Not a teacher with a white-trash history.” She kissed the side of his mouth. “But honestly, Colt, it’s more than that. You do something to me. When I’m with you, you know the real me and it’s okay. It’s okay to just—”
“Be,” he finished for her.
The words he’d told her at the bonfire flashed back, and he liked that JJ was letting go. She nodded and Colt knew exactly how she felt. Because when he was with her, all that ambition, drive, and kindness zeroed in on him. He wanted to be the kind of man who deserved that. The kind of man she could be proud of.
The kind who stuck around.
…
Jenna was on fire and burning from the inside out. When they crossed Diamond’s city limits, that spark flared out of control. Colt hadn’t given up on her. Instead, he took her somewhere else and allowed her to feel however she wanted to feel.
And what she wanted to feel was Colt.
The growing addiction she’d been worried about developing for the world-class champion tripled. The smell of him, woodsy and masculine. The way his lip twitched upward when she kissed along his jaw and nipped his stubbled chin. Every time she licked around his earlobe, he gave her shoulder a squeeze. She felt sexy. Even in worn jeans and an old tank top, he found her desirable.
Was this what it felt like to be with someone?
It must. Because Jenna was feeling like some lovesick high schooler desperate to make it to third base with her boyfriend in his truck.
Speaking of third base…
She unclasped his belt and before he could say a word, her hand dived into his pants and gripped his cock.
“Shit, JJ,” he hissed.
He was hard and hot and Jenna wanted him. Couldn’t wait to get to…wherever it was they were going.
She stroked up and down. His arm tightened around her.
“We’ll be at the lake in thirty minutes.”
She shook her head. “Can’t wait.”
Colt took a hard right down a dirt road and parked. Apparently he couldn’t wait either. Tearing his seat belt away, he cupped her face in both hands and kissed all the breath out of her.
His mouth didn’t leave hers as he maneuvered her across the front seat. His tongue plunged between her lips, fierce and demanding.
He quickly worked her jeans down her legs and off. She shifted so she could cradle him between her thighs and pushed down his pants and boxer-briefs, wedging them just below his hips.
His thick cock slid across her silk-covered core and she arched, craving deeper contact.
“Condom,” she whispered. Colt reached into his pants pocket, retrieved one, and slid it on.
He paused and took her face in his hands again, running fingers through her hair. He pushed a loose curl away from her brow and simply stared at her. His expression brought tears to her eyes. He looked at
her like she was special. Like there wasn’t a single thing lacking about her or a single trait he found displeasing.
Crooking a finger around her panties, he pushed them aside and positioned himself at her entrance. He didn’t say a word but kept his stare locked on her face as he surged forward, seating himself deeply inside her body.
…
Colt took in Jenna’s every reaction as he sank himself to the hilt. He wanted to see her. Wanted to watch the real her, raw and passionate, as he connected his body with hers. Her delicate brows drew up while her eyes blazed like an overcast sky. He shifted her hips to take that last inch, and those lush lips of hers parted on a small gasp. Christ, she was gorgeous, and he wanted to sear every expression she gave into his memory.
He stayed there, buried deep in her silky depths, feeling as though he’d just come home. This was where he was meant to be.
“Perfect,” she whispered and leaned up to kiss him. She gripped the back of his neck in one hand, and his ass in the other.
Colt withdrew almost completely, then pounded back inside. Her little gasp transformed into a moan. So he did it again and again until those moans became screams.
“Christ, JJ, I want you so much. All the time.”
“Never enough,” she agreed and pushed on his chest.
He cupped her ass and rose, turning to sit on the passenger-side seat. Never leaving Jenna’s body, he positioned her in his lap, her legs on either side of him.
She gripped the back of the headrest behind him and ground down on his cock, hard.
“Jesus,” he breathed. She was working him over. Moving like she couldn’t get him deep enough. He knew that feeling, because no matter how hard, how far he surged inside of her, it was never enough. He wanted more. He wanted to be so buried he wouldn’t have to ever leave.
She threw her head back and Colt felt all that long hair brush across his thighs. He tugged down her tank top, baring those amazing breasts, and latched on.
“Ah, yes!”
She whipped her hips in his lap faster. Colt sucked harder. Biting the tip, then licking away the sting. He wrapped both arms around her, splaying his hands on her back. Every nerve ending in his fingertips needed to feel her. Her shoulders tensed beneath his touch. Her tiny little waist moved back and forth, up and down as inch after blessed inch of soft, sweet skin wrapped around him. Face buried in her breasts, he clung to her like a life force.