“Then where are we…” She trailed off when he turned a corner. Worry began to edge out her exhaustion. They drove another three blocks and he turned another corner and her fear was confirmed. She knew exactly where they were going.
“You can rely on me,” he said.
“No.” Gripping the door and curling her nails into his palm. “I don’t want to do this, Archer. Please don’t make me do this.”
“You told me you have to go back and that I make you feel safe. I’ll put my blade through the throat of any man you nod at. No one can hurt you, Squirm. If you want to keep your job, you have to be able to show up without flipping out.”
That might be true, but she wasn’t ready. Her mind had shut down after her reaction last night and the mental block wouldn’t lower. She couldn’t go to Sizzle and walk in there, she just couldn’t do it. Archer kept driving until he pulled up right outside the front entrance.
Without pausing to talk or hesitating for a second, he got out, came around and opened her door. When he’d made a decision, he didn’t dick around. So he grabbed her arm and hauled her out to slam the door behind her.
“Do you have keys?” he asked.
For a moment, she considered saying no because maybe if she could convince him that they had no legitimate way to get in, he would give up and take her away from here. Except, he wouldn’t be that easily defeated and no doubt, he knew exactly how to pick a lock or find a building’s weakness. He’d get them inside whether she admitted to having the keys or not.
Digging her hand into her bag, she clutched her keyring, and was pulling it out when she stepped forward. But Archer snatched her arm to pull her to a halt. “Don’t rush it,” he said and she wasn’t quite sure what he meant.
If they’d come here to go inside, as far as she was concerned they should go and get this over with. “What do you mean?” Following his line of vision to the sidewalk for a brief moment, she looked back at him. “What are you doing?”
“If you’re gonna work here, spend nights here, you have to face everything that happened here and this is where it started, right? The bouncers died here on this pavement.”
That was true. The dark gray asphalt showed no hint of blood now. But it had rained earlier in the day, so it was already stained dark and wet. Nya hadn’t seen the bodies here, or maybe she had, but had blocked it out.
Screaming and kicking were her priorities when she’d been hauled out of Sizzle that night because she’d been hanging over Archer’s shoulder, terrified of what would come next. But he was right. The men she’d worked with, trusted, overseen, they had died on this sidewalk.
Going in and out of Sizzle every night, she’d have to walk over this ground. There were side doors and a back entrance, but usually she entered and exited via the front. Every time she crossed this space, she’d be walking on their final resting place, the spot where these men had taken their last breaths.
Pity and sorrow for their lost lives and mourning loved ones overwhelmed her. They’d lost their lives for no good reason as so many people in this deprived area did.
“I want you to stop and think about it,” he said, taking the keys from her hand to leave her by the car staring at the concrete, he went ahead to unlock the door.
With his back against the door, he held it open for her and waited, giving her the time to breathe and face the trauma at her own gradual pace. Coming to terms with how that fateful night had played out could only be done in increments, and that’s why he’d stopped her here. Exposing her to the timeline, one event at a time, helped her to reflect and accept.
When she was ready, without saying a word, she went across the pavement and sailed past him, through the entrance, and into the corridor that led to the club. She must have walked this way a thousand times. At this moment, it was dark and though the low ceiling didn’t help to quell her fears, the corridor’s width staved off the anxiety of claustrophobia.
Immediately to her left were the admission booths where patrons paid. Further along was the now silent cloakroom with its shutter pulled down. Right at the end was the flood of light coming from the club. It wasn’t illuminated by its artificial lights, but there were glass panels in the roof letting in some patches of natural light.
Striding up the hallway, she stepped into the main club and stopped to think about Jamie. Only a few feet from here was where she’d been snatched by the men who rushed in and surprised them both.
Even though she’d tried to fight, Jamie hadn’t stood a chance. At that initial moment there had been five men surrounding her, and Nya now knew there would’ve been a further two coming up the rear who’d have jumped in if there was a scuffle.
Those two were probably left with the corpses to act as lookouts, waiting to see if the shots had been heard. Their second task would’ve been to search the building for Tag, who, of course, hadn’t been present.
The bar was on the far side of the room, that’s where she’d been standing. Long and straight, it curved at both ends into shorter straight sections that weren’t manned. Large as it was, that wasn’t the only bar, there was a small, circular one in the back corner of the dancefloor opposite the DJ booth. A VIP area hung over it on a mezzanine floor. It had a view over the full dancefloor and came with its own server, when it was rented out.
Three stories above was the roof of the club, leaving plenty of empty space for the lights and speakers to hang far overhead, never intruding on the revelers’ space. Sizzle was supposed to be a place of pleasure, a place of happiness and fun. That illusion had been destroyed in the space of just one night.
Behind the bar in a secret crevice that was off-limits to customers, was the office where she did the paperwork and where the safe was situated. The raiders hadn’t cared about the office or the money, all they’d wanted was Tag.
A presence behind her made her turn her head, but she didn’t have to look at him to know who was there supporting her. “She was so young, just twenty-two, and always so damn happy and innocent. Not virginal, but you know, not like us.”
He laid his hands on her shoulders and skimmed them up to cup the sides of her neck. The physical contact was enough to comfort her. When she blinked, moisture tracked down her face. “You weren’t responsible,” he murmured. “It’s survivor’s guilt that’s making you feel like this.”
She exhaled because he was right. Relinquishing some of her rigidity, her weight sagged onto his supporting body. Needing more, she took his hands from her neck and wrapped them around her shoulders. Keeping hold of his hands, Nya forced him to squeeze her tight.
“I was behind the bar when they came in. I sent Jamie to talk to the bouncers, to tell them we were ready to leave. Maybe if I had—”
“What?” he asked. “Gone yourself? Gone with her? It wouldn’t have made a difference. Those idiots didn’t have a fucking clue what they were doing. They were trigger happy. They took out the bouncers ‘cause they were scared pussies. But their fuck-up saved your life.”
Like he’d said when he sauntered into the breakroom that night, leaving the bodies on the street drew attention to where they were and what they were doing. Archer had said that if he was in charge he’d have brought everyone inside. She wasn’t sure if it was intelligence or conniving on his part, but he understood how to handle fraught situations to achieve what he wanted.
Brushing her lips on his arm, she already knew the answer to her question, but had to ask it anyway. “Do you ever work with others?” she asked.
“Sometimes. Not like, officially, but yeah, brief alliances can bring mutual benefit.”
“Is that how you knew Jonno? Have you worked with him before?”
His chin met her crown. “Sort of,” he said, “I guess you could say that.”
Twisting around in the constricting circle formed by his arms, which he didn’t loosen, she had to look him in the eye. “Have you…? Have you watched him… hurt women? Like they hurt Jamie?”
Touching her hairline, his fi
ngertips slid around the perimeter of her face until they paused under her chin. “I figure you’d know by now how I feel about rape,” he said. “I’d never let that shit go on in front of me.”
Grief weighed on her chest. “She was so scared,” she said, hating how uneven her voice was. “She was terrified. He held that gun to her head and she lost control. I did exactly what they said when they ordered me in there… I don’t know what I thought would happen.”
“You did the right thing,” he said. “The where didn’t matter. They’d have done the same thing to her in here as they did in there.”
The breakroom door wasn’t quite in sight because they weren’t far beyond the threshold. But she looked to her right anyway, to the wall it was on and knew Archer wouldn’t let her out of here until she’d faced that demon.
“Do you think that if I told them where Tag was, they’d have let her live?” she asked, distant, and unsure which response she wanted.
He dipped his head until his lips moved into her hair. “No,” he said, returning his arm to her shoulders. “They’d probably have killed you too.”
Would they have raped her first? Would it have mattered? If she’d given Tag up, maybe the guys would’ve put a bullet in her and one in Jamie, saving them from the horror of being subjected to the violent sexual assault. But if they had been raped, Archer would’ve had time to get here and might have saved the day.
Except… “You said Jamie was too far gone when you walked in,” Nya said. “If you’d walked in on them raping me, would you have walked away?”
Back then, she was nothing to him. They didn’t have a relationship. So he’d have had no reason to care any more about her than he cared about Jamie. But she was the link to Tag that he needed, maybe he would’ve stepped in to help her because he needed her alive for the information.
“I’ve never watched Jonno rape a woman. He’s a sick sonofabitch. I’ve seen him do some shady shit, and I’m not saying that what he did was right, but when he does screw women without their permission, it’s opportunistic.”
“Like? I don’t get it.”
“Like, he’s your classic GHB predator. I think he packs roofies in his wallet next to the condom. Those guys with Jamie wanted her to fight. Like Bryant. Those sick fucks get off on that. Jonno wants a woman helpless. And, Squirm, you ain’t nothing close to helpless.”
“He had friends,” she said. “The one who touched me first and those two who came in after.”
“I didn’t say you’d have been left alone,” he said. “I’m just telling you that Jonno would’ve been more interested in getting the job done than getting off.”
That didn’t make her feel better, but she understood his point. Urging her head forward, she laid it on his chest. “I think about that night. When I was lying on your bathroom floor and all those nights I was at Tag’s… I think about it and I can’t sleep… I’ve had nightmares, like I’m a stupid kid. How dumb is that?”
“You have nightmares with me?” he asked, tucking her hair away and she bowed back.
“Not in your bed, no, I… I’ve never been scared lying beside you.”
His open palm pushed her head to its previous place on his torso. “Good.”
“I think about what I could’ve done. Should I have been nicer? Should I have been more cooperative and told them what they needed to know?”
“You acted on instinct and that was to protect Taggert.”
Archer’s excuses for her actions didn’t relieve her guilt. “Jamie was beautiful. Young and vibrant. She lost her life. It doesn’t seem right.”
“It never does,” he said. “How many junkies and whores and gangbangers have you known to die for no reason?”
Loads. Sometimes she heard news of people dying because of ODs, domestic violence, or turf wars on a daily basis. “But Jamie wasn’t like that,” she said. “She wasn’t one of those people, she had prospects, you know? It just seems so wrong.”
“And that’s why you’re desperate for payback,” he said.
Standing in his arms, talking this out, it was so much more therapeutic than the terror and panic that had ripped through her when she tried to do this alone. “I don’t know what I am. Tag doesn’t think it’s a good idea. He told me to stay away from it.”
“Taggert thought it was a good idea for you to come back here on your own last night when it was packed to the rafters. Tag stiffed me and I have the ability to hurt him. He ripped off Hexam who’s one dangerous motherfucker. Your boyfriend doesn’t always make the best decisions.”
Digging her hands into his back jeans pockets, she leaned away to make eye contact. “I know we’re maybe in a bit of a gray area now,” she said, surprised and pleased to realize that her tears were drying. “But when does that become your job?”
“My job?” he asked.
“You fucked up last night, we both agree on that. But you’re here now trying to prove to me that you care enough to support me even with the not-so-fun stuff.”
“Yeah,” he said. “And?”
“And… we’ve done a lot of fun stuff. You’d think all the times you’ve put your dick in my pussy might have clued you in to the idea that I’m open to being with you. All those times I’ve asked you to eat me or had your cock in my mouth…”
“What about them?” he asked.
“Add those to all the times we’ve lay around together in our underwear watching TV, sharing meals, talking about our lives and our histories, sharing our secrets… Don’t look now, Fella, but I think we’re in a relationship.”
Tag had referred to Archer as her boyfriend last night, and although she knew Archer used the word to refer to Tag to get a rise out of her, she wanted him to take ownership of the role, to take ownership of her.
“You think I didn’t notice?” he asked.
For a guy who spent his entire life observing everyone around him, scrutinizing their behaviors, monitoring their actions, she’d like to think that he’d realized what was going on in his private bedroom.
“Did you?”
“There’s a reason I don’t call you my girlfriend.”
So it wasn’t incidental, it had been a conscious choice. “And what reason is that?” she asked.
“ ‘Cause I have to explain some stuff to you first before I make this public.”
“We’ve been out together in public, we had dinner.”
“Yeah, once,” he said. “And you’re hot. That meant squat, could’ve been a one-night stand. Soon as you’re working again, I’ll be spending a lot of time here, and I’ll be making it clear to every customer that you’re my property.”
A fist of intrigue clenched inside her core. “How will you do that?”
“I’ll kiss you,” he said, pressing his lips to her head. “I’ll touch you.” He bent to squeeze her ass. “And I’ll be demanding submission.” She gasped as he caught the loop on her cuff and thrust her arm in the air to drape it around his neck. “You need me to own you, and once you’re mine, I won’t care where we are, I’ll do whatever I want with you.”
Her heart beat so hard that she felt it in her thighs. “Doing what I’m told gets me hot,” she whispered.
Bending to kiss her, he brushed his nose over hers. “I know,” he murmured. “It won’t take long for word to get out that your pussy has a permanent tenant.”
Everybody knew Archer, those words returned to her mind. “So why not call me your girlfriend?”
“I want everyone to know and they will, damn soon too, ‘cause I don’t dick around with my lady’s status. You’re taken. Every cock in the joint will have to sniff for scraps elsewhere. Only a guy seeking suicide would think about hitting on you.”
“Is this the part where you tell me that you have enemies and that they’ll try to get to me to get to you?”
“No,” he said. “Fuckers would have to be straight-up looney toon to consider hurting you, they know what I’m capable of.”
“So what then?” she asked.
/>
“No one will hurt you. But they’ll assume that you know everything I know.”
Clarity helped her to relax. “Oh,” she exhaled. “So I’ll be inundated with information requests.”
“Probably. That and the begging will start. People want to know what I know and I don’t take every job that’s offered.”
Being selective meant he had to turn people down and those people would be disappointed, maybe desperate. “So I’ll get the sob stories? People assuming that I can get you to work for them?”
“Yep. And that’s why we need to talk before going public; we need to lay down some rules.”
She wasn’t worried. Working bar meant she’d heard a lot of tales from desperate people. “I can handle people,” she said. “I’ve already talked to Tag about getting more security around here anyway. So we don’t have to worry about nut-jobs. I’m going to get someone in who knows what they’re doing, to install some sort of security system and maybe hire some more guys.”
“Good plan,” Archer said. “I can hook you up.”
Appreciating his show of support, she smiled, but had to assert herself even in a playful way. “I have contacts,” she said.
He bumped his forehead on hers. “Not like mine, you don’t.”
Not having a male ego weighing her down, she could yield, because he would know the best and the best was what she needed.
twenty-two
“Ok, we’ll talk about it more when I start making plans,” Nya said.
“I’ll set it up,” he said, taking control as was his natural urge. “Run of the mill crazies you can handle. But I need to know that you won’t manipulate me after you’ve fallen for the bullshit. You can’t ask me to take every job.”
Protecting his time and his livelihood was important, the last thing she wanted to be was his weak spot. “You think I’m a soft touch. You think I’ll fall into every pair of batted eyes and believe every tear that falls?”
“I don’t know yet,” he said. “And you can’t know either, because we never know what we’ll be faced with or how it will affect us.”
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