by Paul Hond
Nelson must have told her. Told her something. But what did it matter? The flowers—they were here. And the card.
But why no signature? What was she telling him, or not telling him? Did she expect him to know it was her? Was it some kind of signal, a wink? Was it shyness? An oversight?
Mickey looked at the telephone, there by the vase.
“Who is it from?” Morris said.
“I think it might be from Nelson’s mother,” said Mickey.
“Nelson’s mother?”
“You’ve met her.”
“And she forgot to sign her name?”
“People forget,” said Mickey. “Sometimes they forget.”
“Sometimes they forget on purpose,” said Morris, but Mickey could see from his uncle’s blank expression that the comment meant nothing.
“Maybe I should call,” Mickey said.
“Maybe you should call and ask her,” said Morris.
Mickey looked at the card again. Hope these will help you get better. Hope? The word seemed strange to him, like a name he once knew, a woman.
“It couldn’t be anyone else,” Morris said, proud that he’d kept the news so airtight under his hat, as per Mickey’s instructions. “No one knows a thing.”
“Should I call?” said Mickey, more to himself. He glanced from the card to the phone, and back to the card. “What if they’re not from her?”
“So then you say hello,” Morris said.
Mickey breathed deep. Christ, he wanted to get the hell out of here. Get these bandages off and get a shower and dress up in his own clothes. Talk on his own phone. Make his own dinner.
“I think I’ll take a walk,” said Morris. “They got a nice salad bar on the first floor.” He stood up, wobbled a moment. “You ought to get up and walk, Mickey. Instead of lying there all day and night. You want anything from downstairs?”
“No,” Mickey said. “Benjie ought to be here soon.”
He watched as his uncle shuffled past the bed, an old man headed out to ogle the nurses and get lost in the marvelous possibilities of the salad bar.
“Morris,” Mickey said. “Before you go—can you hand me the bag you brought? The food?”
Morris turned back, picked up the bag and set it on the bed next to Mickey. “There’s utensils inside,” he said.
Mickey closed his eyes for a minute, then opened them. Morris was gone. The food would be cold by now, Mickey thought. That was okay, he was supposed to avoid hot food.
He reread the card. Get better, it said.
The phone rang. Mickey felt the shrill peal of metal in his gut.
He reached over and picked up. “Hello?”
“Dad. It’s me. Just letting you know I’m on my way over. You need anything?”
Mickey gripped the receiver. A blaze of gold from the sunflowers caught his eye. “I’m fine, Benjie,” he said.
He wished there was a radio around, that he could listen to some music, something to further encourage his waking senses; he wanted to raise his hands and conduct from his bed, command a minor orchestra. And so he did: he raised one hand, thumb and forefinger touching, and over his body threaded the rise and dip of some old, nameless symphony.
He recalled how the Tchaikovsky had dwindled so peacefully to its conclusion instead of ending with dramatic finality, with the grand, decisive blasts that marked many symphonic works. Audiences in Tchaikovsky’s time hadn’t been ready for that kind of ending, that long decrescendo, like an exhaled breath, into silence, air. Perhaps they did not see themselves that way. But Mickey understood. The end must come, be it in a violent flash, or slowly, like the long, crumbling death of a tradition. But let it come like sleep, Mickey prayed; let the strings lower us softly, let the bassoons linger in the dark.
THE
BAKER
PAUL HOND
A READER’S GUIDE
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Questions for Discussion
1. Is Mickey’s initial disapproval of the friendship between Ben and Nelson racially motivated? Why or why not?
2. Discuss the role of class in Mickey’s relations with a) Donna; b) Shaw; c) Emi; d) Dulac.
3. Compare and contrast Mickey’s and Nelson’s relationships with their respective peer groups, and with each other.
4. Mickey’s bakery is destroyed; Emi is murdered by a black teenager; Nelson is insulted by an Orthodox Jew; Ben fires Nelson. Do you feel that any of these catalyzing events was racially motivated?
5. What is the nature of the attraction between Mickey and Emi? Between Mickey and Donna?
6. How did Mickey’s boxing match—and his decision to quit boxing—alter the course of his life? What did boxing provide him? (Compare the boxing scenes with the baking scenes in Dulac’s cellar and at the house.)
7. Discuss the impact of Mickey’s decision to go to Paris and leave Ben in charge of the bakery. Do you think it was ultimately a wise decision? Why or why not?
8. What do you think is at the core of Mickey’s overwhelming guilt in life? Do you think it is finally reconciled in the end? In what way?
9. Do you think Ben’s fear and paranoia over Nelson was justified? Was Nelson’s anger toward Ben over his firing justified? Discuss.
10. Have Mickey and Donna been good parents? Will their sons survive in the world?
Paul Hond was born in Baltimore and
lives in New York City.