by Natalie Ann
“You’ve had no help from your family at all? I know you said they still live in Kentucky.”
“No. We’re...estranged is the best word I can come up with.”
He wanted to ask more but decided not to. Decided that it might kill the mood that they both had been trying to maintain. One to get them through this dinner because there was so much anticipation of what was to come at her house. A buzzing in the air that sounded like a swarm of bees ready to move toward their honey.
He paid the bill and they walked back to his SUV. “Did you want to go do anything else?” He hoped not, but felt he should at least offer. It was their first real date after all.
“No,” she said, then took a deep breath. “I want to go back to my house. And I want you to finish what you started on my couch a few weeks ago.”
***
It might have been the boldest she’d ever been, but she’d had no clue what he was waiting for.
He’d already given her one mind-numbing orgasm and that was just on her couch with his hands down her pants. Really? She didn’t even do that in high school. Ethan was her first. Her first everything. Even kiss, as embarrassing as that was.
She didn’t have a lot of experience, but she knew what Jared made her feel was different than what she’d ever felt before. She’d never been so hot before. So urgent or so eager. Jared made her want to just push him onto the bed and rip his clothes off.
Two weeks of waiting for it again was driving her insane. She was starting to think it had to do with Kayla being in the house so she asked Nancy to take her baby for the night, praying this might push him.
She really hoped he wasn’t holding back because of his accident. She knew about his scars. She didn’t care. None of that mattered to her at all. She’d told him enough, and was hoping he finally got the point.
All that mattered right now was that he laughed when she said her bold statement and grabbed her hand and pulled her back to his car, letting her believe she was finally going to have what she’d been waiting for.
“Only if you’re sure,” he said, looking at her as they climbed in.
He didn’t have his glasses on during dinner. She’d come to expect he only wore them when they were together if his eyes were tired or they’d be watching TV or anything where he’d be at a distance of greater than five feet. Otherwise, he had his sunglasses on or nothing. She found he was pretty darn sexy with his glasses.
And he’d had his hearing aid on nonstop now.
“I’m sure. I’ve been sure for days now.”
“Really?” he said, turning to look at her.
“Yes. I figured maybe it’d be better to have the house to ourselves. That maybe that was what was holding you back.”
He laughed even harder. “The only thing holding me back was you giving the go-ahead.”
“Oh. Guess I haven’t been real obvious about it then.”
“Not enough.” He reached his hand over and patted hers on the seat between them. “Now you have been.”
The drive to her house was fast. She was glad they weren’t that far. They got out of his car nice and calm and it was killing her.
She wasn’t calm in the least. She was antsy like she’d never felt before. Like when she was just waiting for Ethan to come pick her up on their first date when he was on leave. She wasn’t even this nervous the night she and Ethan married and she lost her virginity to a man she’d just met in person.
She was looking at Ethan as her savior back then. Jared wasn’t saving her from anything. He was showing her everything she’d missed out on in life so far.
She wasn’t answerable to anyone right now but herself and she knew exactly what she wanted.
The minute the door shut, she backed him against it. “I’m really sorry if you don’t like that I’m forward, but I’ve been waiting for this for what seems like a lifetime.”
“Don’t be sorry. Be any way you want to be,” he said, grinning, and then picked her up and carried her down the hall to her room.
He laid her on the bed and slipped her shoes off her feet, but she stood up and turned her back to him. “Unzip me.”
“I like this side of you. Was it the wine?”
“I barely drank a quarter of it. Not wine. It’s you. I’d say I want to see you naked, but I saw the most important part already. So I guess I’ll just say I want to see it again.”
“You’re making it hard for me to go slow.”
“Who said anything about going slow? Save that for next time,” she said, wiggling out of her dress, then reaching for his shirt.
She didn’t know what had come over her. Maybe it was the wine. Nah. It was him. He was big and strong and sexy as hell. He made her feel weak when she hadn’t felt that way in years. She wanted him to just take her over and under and any way he wanted.
Holy cow! She’d never had those thoughts before either.
“Full disclosure,” she said. “I’m having some pretty wicked thoughts right now, so I’ll apologize if something strange comes out of my mouth.”
“No apologies,” he said, stripping fast. She caught a glimpse of the scars on his side and felt a pang of sympathy, but it wasn’t slowing him down, so there was no reason to draw attention to them.
He pushed her back on the bed and then just moved down her body, bypassing her breasts, and she was disappointed over that. But when his mouth touched her below, she squealed. He stopped and looked up and she said, “Go back to it. Sorry, been way too long.”
She’d always loved that and didn’t get nearly enough of it.
He was working her up quickly, not that she expected otherwise. His mouth covered her completely, pulled in her little bud of pleasure, and then he slid a finger into her and she went from squealing to shouting and was turning the corner on begging. “Jared. Don’t stop!”
He didn’t. He gave no indication he was going to. She was climbing Mount Everest right now, sprinting toward the top, not out of breath, and gaining momentum. Then he nipped her and she hit a wall and started to free fall all the way to the bottom, blissfully floating on a cloud of ecstasy.
She felt him move off the bed, but was almost too weak to open her eyes. “Where are you going?”
“Condom,” he said, looking around in his pants. “You were in such a hurry I didn’t take it out of my pants.”
She watched him bend over. “You’ve got one nice body on you,” she said.
He looked over once he had the condom in his hand. “You do too.”
She scooted up the bed while he put it on. She’d have to figure out some form of birth control at another point so they wouldn’t have to stop again, but for now she was just eying how magnificent he was.
“I know you’re going to be tight,” he said. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Guess you need to make sure I’m not tight again. Stretch me out a bit.” He looked back at her shocked. “Sorry. I told you, full disclosure.”
“Again. No worries. If I’d known you were going to be a wildcat in the bedroom, I wouldn’t have waited.”
“Make it up to me now,” she said, opening her arms for him.
He lay down on top of her and started to ease in. Yeah, she was tight, but it was fine because it was a fullness she’d been craving. Waiting for. Dying for.
“Too much?” he asked.
“Yes, and I love it.”
He laughed again, and then he kissed her and stopped her from saying anything else embarrassing.
Instead, he showed her exactly what she’d been missing and what she’d needed.
She was glad that Jared was the one to show it to her.
More Passion
“No regrets?” he asked a short time later.
“No way. Well...only that we waited so long.”
“We’ve only known each other a few weeks. I didn’t want to rush into it.”
“I know. I’m surprised at my own eagerness. I’ve never been this way before.”
He tilted his h
ead, afraid to ask, but curious. “Were things okay with your husband?”
“Yeah. We just didn’t see much of each other. I’m sure you understand. We took advantage of the time when we could, but he wasn’t as...passionate maybe. Or maybe it’s me. I don’t know. It feels wrong to say that. Like I’m being disloyal.”
“I get it,” he said. He’d been with enough women to know some just had more passion than others. Some were just more into it than others. He was guessing men could be the same way.
“So,” she said, turning over and putting her hand on his chest. “When can we do it again?”
He laughed. He had to. He didn’t really expect this much of a little vixen in the bedroom and found he was more thrilled than he’d been with another woman before. That she seemed to be everything he wanted—needed—in his life right now.
“Anytime you want it, you just tell me.”
“Do I have to tell you, or can I just show you?” she asked, her hand reaching down and cupping him. It didn’t take long for him to show her what the answer was.
***
The next morning Shelby turned over and looked at Jared sleeping on his side.
They’d made love three times last night. Three wonderful, memorable times. She couldn’t remember if she’d ever fooled around that much before. Nah, never. Not even on her honeymoon.
She often wondered if Ethan just went through the motions. If he really didn’t feel as much passion for her. Or maybe he felt about the same as she did. There were times she thought she and Ethan were just more friends that loved and cared for each other and had sex out of a need rather than a want. That their relationship was based on everything but passion and a burning love.
It was more of an escape for her and a longing for him. A longing for a family and someone to love him. Someone he could call his own.
That he was gone most of the time was probably why their marriage seemed to work. If they were together more, maybe they would have recognized it for what it was. But even then, neither of them probably would have done anything about it.
She ran her hand over Jared’s shoulder, his skin warm under her palm, his scars hidden from her view. But she’d seen them last night. Just glimpses and they weren’t anything to turn her off.
She didn’t feel anything other than empathy for the pain he must have endured and it made her wonder if she was too hard on him at times. The times she all but told him to be thankful he was alive and could continue with his life rather than looking for weaknesses.
Otherwise, they were just scars. Pink and white skin. He’d had surgeries, she knew. A collapsed lung that had to be re-inflated, pins put in his leg, broken ribs and lots of cuts. But he wasn’t deformed in her eyes. And even if he was, she wouldn’t care.
In the few short weeks they’d known each other, she found she was feeling something stronger than what she’d ever felt for Ethan. Not just a passion, but a yearning. A caring. Maybe even love.
It was too soon for her to even venture down that road though. She had Kayla to think about and Jared seemed to have his own struggles that he had to overcome.
But if she could help him, she was going to. Because she found that she was a lot stronger than she ever thought she’d be. She just needed the help of Ethan to get her away back then, but now she was good on her own.
And regardless of what the future held for her and Jared, she’d still be good on her own. She knew that now.
“Good morning,” she said when he turned to look at her. He was blinking the sleep from his eyes. She wondered if he’d need his glasses and she turned to get them off her bedside table.
He stopped her. “I’m good. I don’t need them. You’re nice and close to me. Even if you weren’t, it doesn’t matter,” he said pulling her across his chest. “I just want to feel you against me for the moment. How are you feeling?”
She sighed once she settled in. The strength of his body bringing her so much comfort when she didn’t even know she was missing it. The heat radiating off of him, warming her up. “I feel wonderful. I told you that last night. I think I told you multiple times.”
His hand stroked her hair. “You did. I just wanted to make sure in the morning light you still felt that way.”
“Nothing is going to change my mind, I can tell you that much.”
“I’m glad. What time do you need to get Kayla?”
She turned and looked at the clock on her dresser. It was just shy of seven. “No later than nine. She’ll probably sleep until eight or so.”
She’d called Nancy around nine last night to see how Kayla was doing and if she should come get her. Nancy said Kayla was out like a light by eight. Since Shelby hadn’t heard anything else, she was assuming the night went well.
“Do you want me to be gone by the time you bring her back?”
She frowned. “No. I thought we were spending the day together.” That had been the plan.
“We are. I’ve got it all sorted out. I told you that. But I didn’t know if it would confuse Kayla to see I’m here when she isn’t. If you wanted me to leave and then come back in a few hours.”
“No. She’s too young to know or understand. I think it’s fine.”
She threw the covers back and climbed out of bed. She was naked and had never slept that way before, but had been too exhausted to grab clothes last night. She liked that Jared was still naked too. Maybe they had time to do some more.
No. She needed to get up and shower, get some breakfast together and get her mind off the sexy male body sitting on her bed grinning at her like he knew exactly what she was thinking. She felt her face heat up, followed by her body, but he only laughed at her.
“I’m going to go shower and put together some breakfast for us,” she said, taking her robe off the back of the door and putting it on. She didn’t bother to tie it, just crossed it in front of her and held it in place with her arms.
“That sounds good. Do you want help in there?”
“I know how to clean myself. Oh,” she said, giggling. “Yeah. That’d be nice.”
He laughed and then followed her in.
“What are you in the mood for?” she asked him thirty minutes later. They were both dressed and in the kitchen, her body nice and limber like it’d never felt before. She could get used to this.
“Don’t go out of your way. Coffee is good,” he said, pulling a cup out of the cabinet. She was making a pot. “I haven’t made a pot of coffee in a long time. I just pop one of those pod things in the machine and make a cup whenever I want one.”
Once the coffee was brewing, she opened the fridge. “How about scrambled eggs and toast? That’s easy enough. I’ve got to eat something. I always do.”
“If you’re making it anyway...”
“I am. Don’t worry.”
She went about getting their breakfast together and thought about how she missed this. How she missed cooking breakfast and having another adult in the house with her. Someone she could have a conversation with.
“So, what’s the plan for today? You haven’t said a word.”
“It’s a surprise,” he said. “You aren’t supposed to be doing anything today at all. I don’t even want you cooking breakfast.”
“It’s not a big deal. And it’s not that important of a day.”
He snorted at her. “It is to me.”
Make It Special
Mother’s Day. When he realized it was this weekend he knew he had to do something for her. That she’d been alone since she was pregnant and her family was estranged, he figured no one honored her on this day.
That wasn’t right. It wasn’t fair. And it was up to him to make it special for her.
He’d already had his Mother’s Day gift delivered yesterday to his mother and even spoke with her. He said he’d try to call her tonight sometime but had plans for the day and wouldn’t be around. She accepted that answer and didn’t question him more.
His parents never did. They respected his privacy and need
for it. But he never forgot them. He’d never forget all they’d done for him in their life.
Family was a bond for him. He didn’t need to search it out by joining the Navy. He had plenty of it right at home. He couldn’t imagine his life without it.
“You don’t have to go with me,” Shelby said when they walked out her front door. But he wanted to. He wanted to meet Nancy and, from everything Shelby had said about her in the past, he had a feeling Nancy wanted to meet him.
“It’s not a problem. I can’t wait to see Kayla.”
Shelby smiled at him and it just warmed him in a way he never thought he’d feel. Emotions he’d never known were even missing in his life and now he wondered how he couldn’t have known that.
“I’m sure she’ll be excited to see you too.”
Shelby knocked on the bright yellow door a minute later while Jared stood behind her. Once the door was open, Kayla squealed in the older woman’s arms and yelled, “Mama,” then reached for Shelby.
Shelby laughed and pulled Kayla in. “I’ve missed you, baby. Did you have fun with Nancy for the night?”
“Yes,” Kayla said giggling. “We watched movies.”
“Movies? How many movies?”
“Just two,” Nancy said. “Both right after dinner. I had her at the playground before dinner, running her good. I kept her occupied. I don’t think she remembers she fell asleep before the second movie ended. I’m Nancy,” she said reaching a hand past Shelby, toward him.
“Jared Hawk. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Not nearly as nice as it is for me to finally meet you. Hope you took care of Shelby last night.”
“Now, Nancy. We had a wonderful night, but you know I don’t need anyone to take care of me.”
He wasn’t sure how he felt hearing that. He knew she was independent. He knew she was good on her own. But he wanted her to depend on him for something. To rely on him. Maybe be her hero... Crazy thoughts, but he found he was having a lot of them lately.