by Kristie Cook
Mira and Uncle Theo took another step closer, and the others followed suit. Why? Why didn’t they all stay back and talk their way through everything if they really did have good explanations? Why were they moving toward us so slowly as if we didn’t notice . . . as if they were trying to catch us off guard and capture us?
“I said not another step,” I snapped. Without my intending it, the glass cracked under my hands, crooked lines spreading out and away, up and down, across the floor-to-ceiling pane.
The Gate pulled at me through the window, a throbbing in my gut, and my instinct centered on it. We had to get there. Soon. Nothing else mattered.
“You feel the Gate out there, but the only way to get to it is through here.” Uncle Theo thumped his fist to his chest, as though we were supposed to understand. Then he held his hands out toward us, and we both pressed harder against the window. “Please. Don’t do anything stupid. You’ll die out there.”
“Not only your bodies, but possibly your souls,” Mira said, her voice calm and measured. “Come away from the window. Please, before something happens.”
But something happened. The window cracks began to give under my and Jeric’s pressure. Uncle Theo lunged forward, as did Mira. Her hands reached out to Jeric’s chest, and Uncle Theo’s for me. Were they trying to save us or push us or grab us? Panic stopped my heart as we teetered on the edge.
“Let’s go!” Jeric silently yelled, and we sprang backwards.
Out of their hands. Through the window. Into the air.
Our bodies plummeted toward the ground. My stomach flipped and flopped, not used to the feeling of falling so far. Fifty yards out and we could have at least landed in the water, but without a running start, I didn’t see us making it. Instead, I mentally prepared for the landing, as rough as it would be. I knew from past lives how to adjust my body for it. My arms went out to my sides. I concentrated on my breathing, on the perfect tautness of my back and leg muscles to absorb the hit, on the rush of air flowing past as it slowed down.
I expected to hit the ground on my feet with a hard jolt, which would have been normal, not only because of the way we’d jumped, but because it was my first time in this body. It always took a few tries for our bodies to catch up with our minds and souls. But I didn’t feel a jolt.
Rather, something knocked into me, and I slammed sideways into the ground. Agony wracked through my head, side and back. Bones broke. I felt and heard the snaps. Jeric landed beside me on his back with a sickening thud, staring at the sky, his chest barely rising as he gasped for air. His lungs rattled and blood dribbled from his mouth. My heart sputtered and cracked, and I struggled to reach my hand out for his, but I couldn’t move.
Several Shadowmen gathered into a circle over us, ugly smiles on their snow-white faces, exposing toothless mouths. Their inky black eyes didn’t smile, though. They were blank. Utterly void of any emotion at all.
More shadows floated higher above. Their excitement crackled in the air around us.
“Why on Earth or any world would two Guardians jump from the only place they’re physically safe?” one of the Shadowmen asked, his face coming into focus right above me. I remembered his spiky blond hair—Jacey’s Billy Idol-wannabe. He tapped a long, bony finger with a pointy, blackened nail against his chin. “You leave your refuge as if you’re trying to escape it.”
“No trust in the Phoenix,” another Shadowman said. His creepy grin widened. “Just the way we like it.”
“Lucky us,” blond Spike said. “My men blew it when they forgot I’d said your marks would be on your arms rather than your necks or backs. But here you are, weak again, giving us another chance.”
A thrumming sound rattled through the other Shadowmen and they moved together into one being, leaving only Spike in a real physical form. The black mass of death spirits hovered over us. I tried to push myself up, biting back the pain, but my body refused to cooperate. Spike took a step backwards and raised his arms to his side, and the form shifted overhead—again, as one, big shadow—and then folded in on us.
With a grunt, Jeric rolled and managed to push himself on top of me. Guarding me.
“I have to get you out of here,” he said, his voice faint and far away in my mind. “Can you move?”
“I don’t think so. Everything hurts.”
“I’m so sorry, babe. I should have listened—”
Spike grabbed the back of his neck and yanked him off of me, tossing him to the side like a ragdoll. The single entity above split into two, one over each of us.
And dove in.
I didn’t know what they’d planned to do. Eat us like vampires, although they had no teeth? Do the Dementor thing and suck our souls out through our mouths? Push darkness through our pores and into our souls? From the pain screaming through my body, I guessed it was all of the above.
Sharp, pointy things like teeth or nails tore at my flesh, shredding it open. A searing pain poured into the open wounds and traveled through my veins like venom. And Spike’s long-fingered hand, too large to be a man’s, hovered over my chest, sending a thrum into my soul, which balked at the horrid feeling.
I screamed and lashed out with my good arm and tried to kick away the presence at my legs. Jeric groaned and yelled, his body bucking and thrashing in the corner of my eye, but they held him down, too.
“Project!” a man’s voice yelled.
Asia and Brock and the other couple burst into the area of my vision. Brock pulled Spike off of me. The two large shadows broke into regular sized men again, becoming a large force ready to fight.
“Project!” Brock yelled again before punching a Shadowman in the head. “It’s the only way we can save you.”
“Hurry!” Asia called out as she ran for another.
Leave our bodies? Here? They had to be kidding. Or was this how they planned to kill us?
“You have to trust us,” the older woman said as she came to my side and squatted between Jeric and me.
A Shadowman flew at her and knocked her across the sidewalk. Spike dove at me. His hand pressed into the raw wound of my arm, sending more venom into my system. My body weakened even more, and my vision began to dim.
“Jeric,” I thought to him, but he didn’t answer.
“Do it already!” Asia yelled.
With great effort, I slid my hand over to Jeric’s that lay limply by his side. The tips of my fingers curled into his, but he didn’t respond. I turned my head as much as I could. He lay perfectly still, his body a bloody mess.
“Jeric!” I screamed in my head, but no reply came, not even a flinch.
The older man came in our direction, swinging a long blade at several Shadowmen. Their bodies turned to smoke.
“They’ll go away if you do it,” he said.
“But what about our bodies?” I cried, staring at Jeric’s gory form even while Spike continued to feed off me. “We can’t just leave them!”
“We’ll take care of you,” the man said. “That’s what we’re here for. But you have to do it, or you’ll both die!”
Panic swelled inside me. This didn’t make sense. We’d leave ourselves vulnerable, easy kills for the Shadowmen or the others. But instinct told me to project.
“That’s your soul talking to you, little bird,” Uncle Theo had once said. Could I trust him? Could I trust my instinct?
I didn’t have a choice.
Finding the physical bliss that led to my soul exploding from my body wasn’t possible under the circumstances, but somehow my soul managed to release itself.
“Jeric?” I said, not feeling his presence with me. “Jeric!”
I looked down on his body, and he stared up at the sky—not at me but through me—not moving except for a blink of his eyes. Spike left my body and leapt over to Jeric’s. My soul whisked down and the blond
Shadowman jumped back. I hovered right over Jeric.
“Project with me,” I ordered, but he didn’t respond.
Spike and other Shadows swarmed in on him.
“No!” I yelled. The energy of my soul, though weaker than usual, looped a circle around him, pushing the Shadows away. “You can’t have him!”
I hung close to him, close to his heart, as close as I could get without entering his body.
“Jeric, please,” I pleaded. “Come with me.”
But I was afraid it was already too late. A bluish tint covered the skin that hadn’t been shredded and bloodied. His lips were white. A sob wracked through my soul.
“Jeric! Come to me,” I begged anyway. “Come with me, and we’ll be okay.”
The Shadowmen came closer again but I warned them off once more.
“Hurry!” Asia yelled again. Could she tell if I’d left my body? That Jeric hadn’t?
“Come on, baby,” I muttered, my soul weakening even more.
I didn’t know what to do. My soul couldn’t leave him. I couldn’t go to the Gate without him. Maybe I could pull him with me, if I could only grasp his soul. I dared to push against Jeric and soak into his body, hoping I could mix with his soul and help him out. His energy felt heavy, dragged down by his dying body. And cold and dark.
Several Shadows bombarded us with my spirit halfway in Jeric’s body. Spike’s white face came within inches of my soul, his mouth opening wide over Jeric’s chest.
We were both going to die.
Chapter 40
The solitude of silence filled my head once again. Brock’s and his people’s mouths moved as they fought nearby, but I could no longer hear their thoughts. It was kind of disturbing to have those voices in my head, but it’d been kind of nice, too, to hear something besides my own thoughts. Especially Leni’s voice.
My body felt like it’d been through a meat grinder and then thrown into the ring for Cain Velasquez to use as a punching bag. And although I could feel every raw nerve-ending, I couldn’t move. Even my eyes refused to roll to see how badly Leni was hurt. Her soul felt far away, our connection weak, but at least I knew she was still alive.
Something touched my fingers—Leni’s curling into mine. I tried again to move, but my fingers wouldn’t return the gesture. Her panic rose like a wave and crashed over me, and I hated knowing she was freaking out. Over me.
I didn’t deserve her. She didn’t deserve this. I’d really messed up this time.
I’d been so afraid of bringing her here, but I’d been the real danger. She’d been right, but I hadn’t listened to her. I’d given in to my own fear and hatred of bullies, but instead of fighting or actually listening, I’d run. Jumped. And brought her to her death.
I’d been the one to kill her again after all.
My heart fell cold at the thought of losing her again. I could feel her pulling away from me—or me from her. Our souls being Separated once again. Mine as cold as my heart. My whole body frigid and numb.
A ghostly image floated over me. Leni? She’d died already? No! But the anger I should have felt rising never came. Only more numbness. I blinked, wishing I’d just die, too.
A trickle of warmth seeped into my body, into my soul, followed by a tugging sensation. Another ghostly face with ink-black eyes beckoned me. It was time to leave this broken and battered body. Time to leave this world once again. My soul slid out, but the tether to my body remained.
A dim light shone around me, and I felt Leni’s presence.
“I’m sorry,” I tried to say to her, but my energy felt sluggish, heavy and still cold. Darkness crept in around me.
“Don’t do this.” Leni’s thoughts surrounded me, but from a distance. “Stay with me, Jeric.”
“I can’t, babe. Gotta go. It’s better for you this way.” I didn’t know if she could even hear me. Feel me. Whatever. I could barely feel myself. Only long, icy fingers digging into my soul.
“No, Jeric. You won’t take the blame for this.”
“I should have listened to you. Let you light my way.”
“I screwed up, too. But it’s all about right now. You listen to me now, and follow my light.”
I so badly wanted to. I wanted to rejoin her, to soak into her soul and let her warmth immerse into mine. But she needed to be free from me and the destruction I brought to everyone.
Darkness pulled at me with those cold fingers, testing the tether my body held to my soul, like the wind tugging on a balloon tied to a child’s wrist.
“No, Jeric,” Leni screamed around me. “Don’t do this! You stay with me!”
But I couldn’t help it. The tether loosened, almost free. Darkness blanketed my frigid soul, making it even colder.
“Jeric, please,” Leni begged. “Don’t give in. Nobody blames you. Only you, and you have to let it go. I can’t lose you.”
Her pain wracked at me, making me feel worse. The Dark began to descend. And then . . . there. Blackness. I was almost free. Free from the physicality of this world. Free from feeling. From self-hatred. From fear. I could give in and be done with it all. Never again have to think about my brothers or Jacey. About my parents or my sister. Or Leni—the only one I was really to blame for. Micah’s Marine brothers, my parents and sister had been fucked-up situations, but not my fault. I knew this, but survivor’s guilt runs deep. Especially time after time after time. But Leni . . .
“I jumped with you, Jeric. I didn’t listen to myself. I didn’t follow my instinct. I’m as much to blame for this, if not more. If you leave me, if you go Dark, I will have to live with that forever, and I’ll never forgive myself.”
That wasn’t right. I wanted to yell at her, to tell her not to do that to herself, but the Dark continued to close in. But she must have felt something.
“See? It’s stupid, isn’t it? So let go of the guilt. Free yourself. Come back to me.”
But it was too late. Her light dimmed more, faded into the distance as I drifted off to the Dark, my body barely holding on to the tether anymore.
“No,” Leni cried, her voice on the other side of the world. “No, Jeric! Choose love. Follow my light. Please. You can’t leave me. You promised me never!”
A pull from somewhere else other than my body. A light, far, far away, beckoning me. Tugging at my soul.
Leni.
I wasn’t only tethered to my body, but also tied to her. And she refused to let go.
I had promised her never, and as much as I’d done to this girl—to this soul—I was not breaking this promise.
Her light grew brighter, closer, swirled around me . . . and into me. Her warmth heated my cold soul. Her love renewed my dying energy. Every fiber of her soul clung to mine, mixing and melding, and we became one again. And I don’t care who you are, that was better than any prince-fucking-charming kiss.
The light around us bloomed brightly over our bodies. Together, we streaked toward the blond Shadowman who hovered over my chest, and we smashed into his physical form. A high-pitched siren wailed around us as we devoured his darkness with our light. More shrieking sounds tore through the night as the rest of the shadows of the Lakari scattered. Flying away as if we were the sun and would turn them to ash. They all disappeared, and the two Guardian couples blew out a collective breath below us, then gathered around our bodies.
“We’ll take you to the Gate.” Mira’s voice came from around us before her image appeared—looking like her, sans glasses, though not quite there. Ephereal, I thought was the word. Leni’s uncle appeared as well.
The pull of the Gate was stronger than ever, tugging us out toward the middle of the water. We didn’t exactly need to be shown the way.
“Will you trust us now?” Theo asked, and I felt as though that was specifically aimed at me, although Leni and I were a swirling,
hot mess of energy at the moment.
“Of course we do,” Leni said, apology and regret filling her voice.
“Yes,” I agreed, knowing I’d already screwed up bad enough for one night.
Mira and Theo’s forms turned toward our bodies. Asia and Brock easily picked us up as though we were made of paper and carried us into the building. The other two seemed to be standing guard, their eyes to the sky, watching.
“We’ve never been this far away from our bodies,” Leni said.
“You’ll be fine,” Mira said. “After you’re Forged, you’ll even be able to appear to each other, separate, yet still connected.”
“Come now,” Theo said, and he floated over the water where shadows still lingered.
“Like hell,” I muttered.
“You’re safe in this state,” Theo said. “You are light; they fear light.”
“Then why didn’t we do this sooner?” I demanded. I’d learned my lesson to trust them, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t ask questions. Especially when they could have protected us better. “Hell, why didn’t your guards down there project if it would drive them away?”
“Somebody has to care for the bodies,” Mira said as she moved across the water as well. “And after that stupid jump you two made, you were in no shape for it. Now hurry! The sooner you’re Forged, the faster you’ll heal.”
I didn’t ask any more questions. Still joined as one, we moved slowly at first, feeling the tugs to our bodies as though our souls were elastic bands being stretched tight. As we pulled farther and never snapped back, though, we picked up speed. We followed Mira and Theo’s rush farther out from shore until we reached the place in the water between the bay and the Gulf. There was no mansion, though. Only a tiny island barely big enough to hold a single, though huge, weeping willow tree.
“Is this even the right damn place?” I asked, suspicion rising again, then soaring when Theo and Mira suddenly dove into the water. “What the hell?”