Inwardly, she groaned. She should have known he would ask her that. “I actually had not planned to say you raped me, but when the moment was upon me, it just came out. Once it did, I couldn’t take it back.”
“Umm...” He stroked her hand, sending warm chills throughout her. Good heavens, even his voice caused her to shiver.
“I can read you well, my dear Madeline. You and I are similar, as you well know. I realized the reason you said I had raped you was to get sympathy from Andrew. Am I correct?”
She shot her gaze up to his and blinked with wide eyes. “How...how did you know?”
He chuckled. “Because you and I are alike. It’s something I would have done to get my sister-in-law’s attention, too. Of course,” he said bending his head closer to her ear, “Catherine wasn’t my sister-in-law at the time, whereas Andrew is out of your reach because he’s married to your sister.”
She gulped. “Then you are not angry with me?”
“Not entirely. But what I do not understand was why you had acted like you had been with a man before—intimately? If I had known you were innocent, I wouldn’t have seduced you.”
Once again, heat rushed to her face. She dared not answer that question. Thank heavens the dance ended, which gave her a reason to ignore it.
He walked her back. Before leaving her side, he bent and brushed his lips against her ear. Desire poured through her and made her knees weak.
“Believe me, Madeline. I will get an answer from you before the night is over.”
He pulled away, kissed her hand, then turned and left. Her heartbeat hammered in a quick rhythm against her chest, and she couldn’t understand why. Was she still imagining Andrew? Yet, she really hadn’t thought of Andrew at all during the past few minutes.
Inwardly, she growled. How dare Gregg make her feel this way! These feeling were saved for Andrew and nobody else.
Yet, why couldn’t Andrew make her weak in the knees like Gregg had accomplished?
* * * *
Andrew stood back and watched Gregg whisk Juliana away for a dance, grateful it wasn’t a waltz. Maddie waited by his side. Her gaze was also on the pair and she grinned.
“Gregg still wants her, you know.”
Andrew scowled at Maddie. “What? Who does the man want?”
“Juliana.”
He glanced back at the couple. Juliana grinned wide and laughed over something Gregg said. Andrew’s heart ached with jealousy.
“No, he doesn’t.”
Maddie turned and faced him. “Can you not see the way he’s looking at her?”
Andrew shook his head. “You should have seen the way he was looking at you. Maddie, you are the woman he wants. Not my wife.”
She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. “You are sadly mistaken. Gregg has always wanted Juliana.”
“Indeed? Is that why he seduced you behind the hedges?”
He waited for her to look at him, but her gaze remained on Gregg and Juliana. However, Maddie’s jaw hardened. Andrew almost laughed.
“You know, Andrew, denying what is clearly obvious will only make it more painful for you when the truth finally comes out.”
He leaned closer to Maddie and whispered, “And living in a dream world will only damage your heart.” He straightened and grinned. She didn’t have anything to say after that. Instead, he concentrated on listening to the orchestra and enjoying the vision of his beautiful Juliana.
Other conversations around him tried to intrude on his thoughts about Juliana, but he tried to ignore them. Until he heard a familiar name. Someone had called out, “Mary Kate.”
Suddenly, a memory flashed through his mind. Just as before, he was learning to dance with a girl older than him by a few years, who was also taller. Her face became clearer, as did their conversation.
“Mary Kate, stop stepping on my toes. If you will count out the steps like we were taught, you would get it right. I think you’re doing this to annoy me.”
He glanced over his shoulder at the woman whose name was being called, and searched for answers. He heard her name again, then a woman turned toward the person calling her name. Lady Madison? She was the one he’d danced with the other night, and the one that thought he had looked familiar.
How odd.
Lady Madison was greeted by Nicholas Fielding. They chatted for a moment, then turned and walked toward Andrew. His heart sank. Do I know her?
“Mr. Lawrence,” the duke began, “I would like to introduce you to a good friend, Lady Madison.”
Andrew shook her hand and smiled. “Your Grace, Lady Madison and I have met previously.”
“It is good to see you again, Mr. Lawrence,” Mary Kate Madison said.
Nicholas squeezed Andrew’s shoulder. “Did you know she is also related to the Lawrence family here in London?”
Andrew sucked in a quick breath, and it was almost like someone had punched him in the stomach. He cleared his throat. “Umm...no. Lady Madison didn’t mention that the other night.”
She nodded. “Forgive me for bringing this up now, but you do look like the Lawrence family. The men, anyway.”
Quickly, another memory flashed through his head. He was approximately the same age as the other memory, and he was in a closet with his hand on the doorknob, waiting. Footsteps were heard outside the closet, and he jumped out and roared. The girl in his memory shrieked and slugged him in the arm.
“Andrew Dean. You are in trouble now. I’m going to tell Mother.”
Nicholas and Mary Kate kept talking to Andrew. He felt his lips move, but didn’t hear a thing. His mind whirled in confusion, keeping him from thinking straight. Before he knew it, Mary Kate had walked away. The duke clapped his hand on Andrew’s shoulder, getting his attention. It was then when he noticed he and the duke stood alone. Andrew hadn’t even noticed when Maddie left his side.
“Mr. Lawrence,” Nicholas began, “forgive me for being open and blunt with you, but do you by chance recognize Lady Madison?”
Andrew blinked and swallowed the lump in his dry throat. “You know, Your Grace, it’s very odd, but whenever she is around, I do receive some confusing memories.”
Nicholas took a glass of champagne from the servant as he passed, then sipped it. “Indeed? What is in your memory?”
Andrew shrugged. “I do not remember much about my childhood, except that my parents died when I was very young. I was raised by my grandfather and uncle.” He glanced toward Lady Madison who stood beside the duchess. Mary Kate’s gaze was still directed at Andrew.
He looked back at the duke. “But in my memories, I recall being with a girl a few years older than me. Her name was Mary Kate.”
“Your sister, perhaps?” Nicholas raised his brows.
“I don’t know. I don’t recall ever having a sister. But my memories are very confusing, because they tell me I do.”
Nicholas took another sip of his champagne. “Andrew? Do you remember anything about your parents?”
Andrew shook his head. “I was told they died in a house fire when I was seven or eight.”
“Mary Kate had a younger brother who was kidnapped when he was eight years old. Are you aware of this?”
“My wife told me briefly about the story. Very sad, indeed.”
“Andrew, the reason I ask you is because...well...Lady Madison told me that when she first met you the other night, she thought she knew you. Tonight when she saw you walk in, she about swooned. She thinks you are her long lost brother.”
Eeriness moved throughout Andrew’s body, causing discomfort. He laughed, trying to get rid of the feeling. Shifting in his stance, he stuffed his hands in his coat pocket. “She thinks I’m the brother who was kidnapped?”
Nicholas nodded. “It happened seventeen years ago. Her brother would have been twenty-six now.”
Andrew’s laughter stopped. “I’m twenty-six.”
“The boy who was kidnapped was the Lawrence’s only son. His name was Andrew Dean Lawrence.”
/> Andrew’s head began spinning with the information. Could this all be just coincidental? Or could Andrew actually be the Lawrence’s long lost son?
“Andrew? Try to remember your parents. This may be the key to your past.”
Andrew rubbed his forehead as an ache grew. “I cannot. I have not thought of them in a very long time. I don’t remember what they look like.”
“If you want to know what Matthew Lawrence looks like, go study yourself in the mirror. You are an exact replica of the earl in his younger years.” Nicholas touched Andrew’s arm. “Mary Kate is not the only person who has asked me about this tonight. Several people have commented on your resemblance to Matthew.”
Raking his fingers through his hair, Andrew met the duke’s gaze. “What about you? Do you honestly think I am this man’s son?”
Nicholas smiled. “Because I consider Matthew to be a close, personal friend and I know him well—I do think you could very well be his son.”
Chapter Fourteen
Madeline sipped her champagne as she watched Andrew and Juliana on the dance floor, again. When would it be her turn? He hadn’t danced with her since that first time, and she wanted to be back in his arms. She wanted to seduce him with her words so his heart would love her.
She sighed and frowned. How could she do that with Juliana looking so alluring?
“Andrew is one fortunate chap, do you not agree?”
She turned to Gregg who stood close to her with his lips near her ear. “Why do you say that?” she asked.
Without pulling away, he drew his finger over her cheek. “Because he has two beautiful women who are in love with him. Both are vying for his attention. That is one thing I’ve never had the privilege of feeling.”
She tilted her head and grinned. “Are you jealous, Mr. Fielding?”
His gaze drifted to her mouth. “The only person I have ever envied is my older brother.” He straightened and glanced toward Andrew and Juliana. “He’s in love with her, you know.” He nodded to the pair on the dance floor.
Maddie’s heart twisted. It did look like Andrew was in love with Juliana. Especially now. He couldn’t keep his eyes off her. She shook her head. “He doesn’t love her. He loves me. He’s just confused right now. For some reason, Juliana is pretending like she is sweet and caring, which I know firsthand she is not. Soon Andrew will discover this.”
“And I suppose you will be right there waiting with open arms for him when that happens.”
She smiled. “Yes. Of course I will.”
“May I remind you, my dear,” Gregg said, slipping his arm around her waist and pulling her to his side, “that you will be my wife soon. I will not tolerate an affair going on behind my back. I will not allow you to shame my family.”
Cocking her head, she looked at him. “You are very humorous, dear Gregg. Do you really expect me to play the loving and obedient wife when you will still be seducing married women and widows?”
“What makes you think I am not going to change after we are wed?”
She laughed and placed her hand on his arm. “Because you will be stuck in a loveless marriage, just as I. You don’t want to marry me just as much as I don’t want to marry you. But unfortunately, you are the man who took my virginity, and so my meddling brother-in-law forced you to do the honorable thing. Gregg, neither of us wants this marriage, so neither of us will change.”
Silence lasted between them for a few moments while his gaze moved over her face. At first she thought she saw sadness in his eyes, but then the expression left and he grinned.
“You think you have me all figured out, don’t you?”
“Am I wrong?”
“Perhaps. Perhaps not.”
She turned herself, fully facing him. “Gregg, do you expect me to act like a loving wife in all aspects of the word?”
“But of course, my dear. What husband wouldn’t want his wife to warm his bed at night?”
Her heart hammered quickly, and moisture gathered in her palms. She grasped her hands together to keep them from shaking. Images from the other night swam through her mind, reminding her how gentle and attentive he was. But she couldn’t let him know that. She had to get Gregg Fielding out of her mind and put Andrew back in.
She swallowed the dry lump in her throat. “Why would you want me when I’ll be thinking of another man the whole time?”
His eyes widened. “Is that what you were doing the other night?”
“Well certainly. Did you not tell me earlier that evening I should imagine Andrew? Did you not tell me you imagine your sister-in-law when you are with other women?”
He straightened and lifted his chin. “Of course.”
“That’s exactly what I was doing.” So then why did her heart ache from his confession? Why did she suddenly want him to think of her and not his sister-in-law?
Rubbish! The champagne must be getting to her brain and turning it to mush.
She flipped her hand through the air. “So why do you act so shocked that I would do the same thing?”
“I suppose I’m not used to such a young girl who is as passionate. I suppose I’m still confused over your actions that night.” He leaned closer. “You knew things only experienced women know.”
Her heartbeat sped up a notch. Breathless, she tried to compose herself—tried to stop desire from coursing through her from the memory they had shared.
“Tell me, Madeline. How do you know so much if you were truly innocent?”
Panic seized her. She had to get out of here before he seduced her again. “I—I must find my sister.”
She turned to leave, but he grasped her elbow. “Not before you tell me what I want to know.” He lips breezed by her ear. “Tell me how you made me forget I was with a young girl and not an experienced woman.”
Sighing, she looked him in the eye. Out of all the people she knew, Gregg was the only one she could trust this information to. They had grown close. Not because they made love, but because they shared such similar lives.
“A year ago, I stayed with my friend for a fortnight while my parents were out of town visiting a doctor. My friend had an older brother. He was my tutor, but he did not take my virginity.”
Gregg’s eyes widened and his mouth hung open. “I have never heard of such a thing.”
“Well, I’m certain I’m not the only one it has happened to.”
“Why had you not reported this to your parents? They should have made him do the right thing by you.”
“Because I did not want to become his wife.” She shook her head. “Gregg, let us not talk about it again. I would sooner forget that part of my life.”
“As you wish, my dear.”
“Now,” she sighed. “Can we find my sister and Andrew?”
“Not yet.” He took her by the hand. “I want to dance with you one more time.”
He did not give her time to object, but swept her on the dance floor. Curse him, but she liked it.
* * * *
“Mary Kate is lying! I did not put a frog in her shoe.”
“Yes you did, Andrew. Mother? You have to believe me. You know I do not like frogs.”
“Andrew Dean! You and your father are going to have a good long talk when he gets home.”
“Yes, Mother.”
Andrew groaned and rolled over in his bed. In his dream he did what normal eight-year-old boys did. He liked frogs, worms and snails, and any other creepy-crawly thing he could find to scare his sister with. But no matter how much he remembered, he still could not see a clear image of his father or mother.
He sat up in bed and growled. At least he knew he had a sister. Yet why did his grandfather not tell him this? Even his uncle acted as if all of Andrew’s family perished in the house fire. And why had they always called him Andrew Dean instead of his real last name? Come to think about it...he didn’t even recall his own grandfather or uncle’s Christian names. Grandfather was always gramps, and his uncle was always Uncle Thomas. But Andrew did have a s
ister, and her name was Mary Kate. The flashes of memories couldn’t be lying to him.
He sighed and pushed his fingers through his hair. After the ball was over last night, he, Juliana and Maddie returned home. He made excuses about retiring to his room, instructing Wilbur not to let anyone disturb him. Too many things weighed heavily on his mind, and he would go insane if he couldn’t remember.
Poor Juliana was probably worried sick. He had kissed her cheek before heading up the stairs to his room, and worry etched itself on her wrinkled brow. He would explain things to her as soon as he understood them. She would understand and comfort. He knew she would.
He pushed out of bed and wrapped a robe around his body. A stiff drink would help relax his mind and perhaps help him to think better. But he’d have to go downstairs to get his drink. Softly, as not to wake anyone in the house, he crept down the stairs to the parlor where the liquor tray was kept. He poured him a healthy amount of whiskey, then gulped. When it burned down his throat, he grimaced. Soon the liquor would start to work. Of course, he might have to take the bottle up to his room and become a roaring drunk in the meantime.
As he tiptoed back to his room and passed Juliana’s door, he paused to listen. From inside, her deep sighs echoed in the room. He smiled. Whatever the reason was for her heart changing toward him, he was happy for it. And yes, he could admit now that love was the emotion bursting with him whenever he thought about her. Perhaps when he finally told her they were truly married, she wouldn’t hate him.
On impulse, he opened the door and crept inside next to her bed. The room remained dark, only the moon shining through the split in the curtains brought any light. She sighed again and rolled toward him. Even in sleep she looked alluring.
He set the bottle of whiskey on her bed stand, then sat on the edge of the bed. With his finger, he lightly traced her cheek then her lips. They parted, and his heartbeat took on a quicker rhythm. Her love was just what he needed right now.
“Juliana,” he whispered.
Her eyes fluttered open and she glanced around the room, then to him. “Andrew?”
“Yes, my dove. It is I.”
She blinked and lifted to her elbows. “Is something amiss?”
True Love's Deception (book 3) (The Fielding Brothers Saga) Page 16