"No, no, no." I groaned, burying my head in his chest. He held me against him for what could have been minutes or hours. Time lost meaning.
"Ali," He whispered.
I pulled back to look at him, almost afraid of what I'd see in his eyes. They remained blue and unchanging.
"It's just a dream." I said sadly, pulling away from him. He caught my hand in his.
"I know." He said quickly. "But can't we just enjoy the time we have here together?"
His plea struck me deeply, and I relented. He led me to the couch, misplaced and odd sitting on the snowy porch, but it seemed normal in the dream. He sat, pulling me down next to him onto the soft cushions, and I snuggled against him as he drew a blanket over us. The cold couldn't reach us here despite the snow, and the warmness I felt emanated from within.
For a moment, I was whole again. The dream dissolved slowly, and the rest of my sleep was deep and peaceful.
It was dark when I woke. Opening my eyes, I saw Stephanie lying on the bed. The rhythmic rise and fall of her chest indicated she was sleeping. Joss had pulled a stool next to the window and was staring out. I drew his attention as I sat up.
"It's only been an hour," He whispered, "You can sleep more. I'm okay."
"No," I responded, processing how restful my short nap had been. I felt completely refreshed. "I'll check for the signal now. Have you seen anything out there?"
"Nothing," He said, standing with me. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"Nothing about this is a good idea." I said, motioning toward Stephanie. Joss shook his head as he walked past me into the hallway. I followed, assuming he didn't want our conversation to wake her.
"I told her about us." He said, sounding guilty. My body tensed, but I kept silent. I hadn't given a thought to how we'd hide our condition from her, but now I didn't have to. Instead, I was wondering how she reacted to the revelation. "She's the one that took care of me when I got shot, and she found the bite. She said she heard rumors before, so she already knew, I guess. Maybe I said too much too fast, but..."
He trailed off, leaning back against the wall. He ran his hand through his thick, black hair, and his cheeks puffed out as he exhaled. It was the same motion I'd seen Seth do hundreds of times. With the dream fresh in my mind, I wrapped my arms around myself to ward away the pain. Joss was already an inch or two taller than me, and it seemed he'd grown even taller in the past week. The older he got, the more he looked like his brother.
"One of the men that died the night we were captured," He finally got out, and I understood why he had struggled with it. I hugged my arms tighter, swallowing down the gruesome memories as Joss finished in a rush. "One of them was the father of her baby. She said she's glad he's gone."
"Oh." The word sounded strangled. It was all I managed to get out. The realization dazed me, and Joss fell silent while I processed. I looked back toward the bedroom and could see her small shape lying across the bed. The maternal nature that I felt for Joss began to seep toward her, strong and undeniable.
"Dammit." I huffed. Joss waited, watching me intently. Taking a few seconds to gather myself, I turned to him and sighed. "I'll be quick. Let her sleep for as long as possible."
Not waiting for his acknowledgment, I turned to grab my belt-pack and left him, quickly slipping out the front door. Before starting away, I made a quick circuit around the house to make sure everything was secure. Nothing was amiss.
As I easily retraced our path back to the shed, I struggled to keep my mind focused on a plan, but my thoughts kept wandering. If they weren't mired in my dream world with Seth, then they were creating nightmares about what Stephanie had to endure as a prisoner in the hotel. It was a useless back and forth that got me nowhere.
A rustle of leaves some distance away snapped my mind back to the present. Slipping into the shadows, I dropped low to the ground and froze, waiting for whatever was in the darkness to make another move. My heartbeat elevated, and a surge of panicky adrenaline shot through me, but the next time I heard the rustling, it was further away. Whatever was making the noise was obviously moving away from me.
My heartbeat slowed as I argued with myself. Part of me wanted to get back to Joss and Stephanie, fearing it could be Reed. Another part of me knew the sound was unmasked and probably caused by an animal. Not quite ready to turn back, I ignored the reasonable half of my brain and pushed forward. Moving silently, I kept an ear out for anything that sounded suspicious. I was getting close to the shed and knew I'd never have the courage to get this close again. It was now or never, and it would only take a minute.
While I was in the adjacent backyard, able to see the shed through the fence slats, I pulled the pad and pencil from my pouch, mentally berating myself the whole time. I felt foolish, but found enough moonlight to see by, and I started to write.
Ryan,
Thank you. Stephanie came with us. I'll do my best to keep her safe. I'll take them to where you told me to go. Stay safe.
I left it short, simple and unsigned. There was no time for a long, drawn-out thank you. Slipping the pad and pencil into my pouch, I moved to the break in the fence. Pausing to listen for any indication I might not be alone, I heard the rustle of leaves again but faintly in the distance. This time, a muffled growl accompanied it, most likely a cat by the tone. I relaxed, feeling slightly more comfortable about my reckless choice to do this.
I ducked through the break in the fence and sidled up to the small building, listening again for several moments. Just the sounds of crickets met my ears. Holding my breath, I moved to open the shed door. Dark emptiness greeted me. I quickly stepped inside, shut the door behind me and pulled out my flashlight. I only turned it on long enough to scan the room and dropped it back in my bag a second later.
Joss had been thorough and accurate. There was barely anything left but water, food, and books. I grabbed a few empty packs since those were easily carried, and gently laid the note in the middle of the floor. Ignoring the feelings of foolishness that reddened my cheeks, I sat a full bottle of water on top of the note so it wouldn't slip away. If Ryan made it through the night, then he would find it, and he deserved to know we were alive and safe. He would never follow us to Vegas, though, so this marked the end of our short friendship.
I left the building before I could change my mind. Moving quickly, I ducked through the break in the fence and jogged past a few houses. I slipped into the shadows of a tall oak tree to gauge my position once more. Just a few blocks south, and I should be in sight of the hotel. As I approached, there was no tell-tale glow in the dark sky that would indicate a fire. I was closer than I thought, and the building loomed in front of me, as dark and foreboding as ever. The icy chill that slid down my spine was enhanced by my disappointment, and then by fear.
This confirmed Reed had made it, and he was out there. I spun on my heel and began to retrace my path back to Joss and Stephanie. As the minutes slipped by, I argued with myself along the way, trying to figure out our safest course, trying to figure out what to do with Stephanie. The little chance she had of surviving out there on her own had just become nil.
She'll slow us down.
It seemed impossible. We might have a month left, maybe two, where she could travel. We could make it to Vegas by then, where the freaks were thick. They were the best guards against the living, but it would be up to Joss and me to make sure we could get Stephanie past them safely. We would be able to hide there, but could we do it?
And then, could we raise a baby in this world?
The thought twisted my insides into a tight ball. I was so confused and unsure, but before I made it back to the house, my mind was made up. In fact, it was no longer even a question. Stephanie was coming with us.
~ ~ ~ ~
I entered the house to find all the same as when I'd left. Joss stood to meet me in the hall. I imagined I could see his eager expression.
"No fire." I whispered and watched his shoulders slump. His hands slid into his pant pocke
ts, and he leaned against the wall, looking back to Stephanie.
"What now?" He tried to hide his disappointment but failed.
"We'll have to wake her soon." I answered. Holding back a sigh, I admitted, "I have no idea how we're going to do this."
As my eyes adjusted to the deeper darkness, I saw the corner of his mouth turn up in a rueful smirk. "I was hoping you'd have a plan, because I don't have a clue either."
"Let's rearrange the packs so she's only carrying the light stuff." I offered, already kneeling to move the clothes and other empty packs to the one we designated as Stephanie's. Joss bent to help me as I continued, "This was supposed to be easy."
"Yeah," Joss agreed. "I had no idea she followed me."
"Would you have turned her around if you had known?" I kept my hands busy, but watched his reaction from the corner of my eye. He paused, thinking hard on the answer.
"I think so, but she would never have gone back." He finally said. "It didn't look so bad upstairs with the kids. Helen thought they'd win." He hesitated before continuing cautiously. "She also said Reed would come after us."
Not us, I thought immediately. Me.
I caught the flash of his eyes as he glanced at me. I didn't need a reminder. Reed was already a constant threat looming in my thoughts, pressuring me to run.
"Ali." His voice was hesitant as he zipped up a pack and leaned against the wall. I looked at him, the tone of his voice unsettling me. The seconds ticked by slowly until he spoke again. "I bit someone."
My jaw went slack, and I couldn't mask my sharp intake of breath. "Who?"
"His name was Allen. He was a creep, and I was just trying to stop him..." His voice trailed away, and I reached for his hand, finding it in the darkness. He clutched me tightly.
"I know who he is." I said, interrupting the growing silence. "He wasn't much better than Russell."
"So I turned him?" His question was barely audible.
"Probably." I gave his hand another reassuring squeeze. He sniffled.
"I had to do something. He was going to hurt Gwen." His words were choked by his tears. Using the grip I had on his hand, I pulled him to me, hugging him tightly. He buried his head in my shoulder, muffling his sobs. We sat there for a long while, long enough for me to feel the wetness of his tears seeping into my shirt. My own cheeks were damp by the time he pulled away.
Joss looked down the hall to where Stephanie slept, drawing my eyes to her also. I brushed away my tears as he leaned in close to me, whispering as silently as possible. "She doesn't know."
I nodded, but I was unable to pull my eyes away from her sleeping form. This brought on a new problem, but one I didn't have the time to focus on.
"If we can turn with bites," Joss's voice was hesitant. "Can we turn if we..."
When his words trailed off, I finally looked back at him, waiting for him to finish before I realized what he was trying to say. I stared at him, speechless, not sure how to react. My eyes shot to Stephanie before I could stop them. The thoughts connected in my head and heat rushed into my checks. Joss was young, naive, but I couldn't ignore the fact he was growing up.
Finding the nerve to answer him, I finally said, "Yes."
Joss loaded the rest of his supplies into his pack, and I turned back to my pile. In the few minutes of silence it took to bundle up the rest of our provisions, my mind wandered. I fumbled with what I could do to comfort Joss, knowing this was painful.
His next words shot through me, rattling me to my core. "How did Seth die?"
I choked from the start his question gave me, realizing the conclusion that his mind had jumped to. Panic and pain flooded through me, and I stood abruptly, before I had a chance to process it all. The night grew darker at the corner of my eyes, and my hand reached for the wall for support. I swayed dangerously against the oncoming head rush before regaining my balance. Finally, I managed to choke out. "Not that way."
My legs wobbled as I stumbled toward the bedroom, fleeing the conversation and the memories. The memories followed, but Joss remained quiet on the floor.
Not that way.
Then the guilt hit me as my thoughts straightened out. I glanced back at Joss, seeing him hunched over the packs. I wished I could ease his pain, but it was impossible. I was too broken inside. I couldn't bring myself to go back to him, to comfort him or finish our conversation. I finally found my footing and walked away, going instead to Stephanie.
Approaching the bed, I brushed the new tears away before reaching out a hand to touch Stephanie's shoulder. I was gentle, but she woke with a start, sitting up in the bed and looking around nervously. When her eyes finally focused on me in the darkness, she relaxed.
"What's going on?" She asked. There was a slight edge of fear in her voice.
"It's time to go." I whispered. Stephanie didn't hesitate to start moving, but she was slow, drowsy from sleep. I held out an arm for her so she could steady herself as Joss came in with her pack. He helped square it on her shoulders as he had done before, while I avoided eye contact with him. Once he was finished, she groggily turned to the bed and grabbed her blanket, sweeping it around her shoulders.
"Ready." She said and yawned.
I followed Joss to the hall as we gathered the rest of our supplies. The silence was uncomfortable, and I regretted giving up my chance to say something. We would both be left waiting until the next time the subject came up again. I was anxious for it and dreaded it at the same time, but eventually, I knew, it would all have to come out.
My failure.
Distracted only slightly by my agitation, I went through the motions of my routine checks before leading us away from our temporary shelter, heading into the cool night. Stephanie stayed close behind me, and Joss followed her. It was unspoken that the safest place for her was between us. We were mostly silent except for the crunch of leaves and twigs under our feet.
I had lost track of time and wasn't sure how close morning was, but I assumed we had a good hour or two of the night left. It was critical that we got ourselves as far away from the hotel as possible. I figured even Reed would have a hard time tracking us at night, but feared what would happen once the sun came up.
Our pace was slow. I wanted to avoid the roads just in case someone followed us with a vehicle, but traipsing around in the dark underbrush was problematic for me, and more so for Stephanie. I noticed Joss's hand reaching out to steady her more than a few times. Despite the difficulties, neither one complained.
Even though Ryan made sure we were stocked with the necessities, he did not include my maps. That could pose a minor setback, but I had spent many nights studying them, committing them to memory. I was sure there was only one road that led into Las Vegas from here, and if we continued going north, we were sure to stumble across it.
My fears that Stephanie would be unable to keep up were unfounded, at least for the slow pace I kept. The hike was thankfully uneventful, and we continued to push north after we had the houses at our backs. Once we broke out into the open, I veered us toward what I thought was northwest, hoping my memory was correct. In the darkness, it was hard to tell, and I was growing increasingly nervous when we finally came across the Great Basin highway. The relief that I'd kept us on a true course washed through me.
Thinking the roads were a bad idea, I pushed us west, parallel to the highway. The brush was thinner here, but the small brambles and uneven ground were proving difficult to navigate in the dark. We were barely a mile away from the houses when Stephanie stumbled.
The gaps between us had widened, and Stephanie was no longer in arms reach of either one of us. Joss had been trailing a good few paces behind her, and I was even further in front of her. Her sudden gasp turned me around in time to see her stumble. Then Joss leaped forward in an impressive display of agility and caught her before she hit the ground.
My jaw dropped as I processed his quick reaction. His movement had been so smooth he hadn't even disturbed the two packs he carried. I stepped closer to the
m, remembering to close my mouth as I did so, and helped him right the pregnant girl.
"Sorry." Stephanie mumbled as she straightened her pack and blanket.
"Are you okay?" Joss's voice was thick with concern, and he hovered close to her.
"Fine," She sniffed and kicked at the stump that had tripped her. "Just didn't see it."
Joss suddenly backed away, seeming to become aware of how close he stood to her. The awkward boy replaced the swift hero, and I felt the briefest hint of a smile brush my lips. It faded as quickly as it had come.
I looked around us, reassessing our path. Small obstacles littered the ground everywhere. They were countless, and that wasn't even taking into consideration the traps I couldn't see. To keep going like this was only inviting more trouble.
"There." I said, pointing to the shadow of buildings, another housing addition that I prayed had been cleared of freaks. "We can walk on the neighborhood roads while it's dark."
Stephanie looked sullen and remained quiet, but Joss was nodding. He added. "We're the only thing I've heard all night."
I veered toward the houses, glancing over my shoulder at Stephanie every few steps to make sure she was okay. She remained tense, with her head cast downward as she carefully placed each step but relaxed once we made it to the pavement. The walk definitely became smoother for all three of us, and we wove south and west as the neighborhood roads allowed. At times, we lost the road in the darkness and had to trudge through the overgrown lawns until we found the pavement again, but we were traveling faster overall.
A short time later, our steps slowed. The fear hung heavily over us, but it was dulled by the monotony of the walk. It was one plodding footstep after another as I led us around obstacles and struggled to keep my sense of direction. I was looking at the sky, hoping to see the dawn lighting the eastern horizon, when I began to notice the stench of decay.
The Phoenix Curse (Book 3): After Page 2