by Sonya Clark
Daisy’s heart thundered in her chest. “Okay.”
He curled his body around hers and nuzzled her neck. She closed her eyes. This was too much, too good. It couldn’t be real. She rested her hand on his chest. His heart beat under her palm, his flesh warm and solid. He drew her closer, kissed her cheeks, her forehead, the tip of her nose and finally her waiting lips.
Daisy wouldn’t have been surprised to find she glowed brighter than the candles, she was so happy to be in his arms.
Chapter 26
Wade stood on his back deck with a cup of coffee, enjoying the view of the lake. Daisy was upstairs getting dressed. They’d slept late enough that he’d missed church with his family but he was too happy to care. He’d woken with a clarity of mind and direction that he hadn’t had in years. He didn’t have every answer he needed yet, but he had ideas. Hope. And it wasn’t just about the beautiful woman he’d spent the night loving.
Good Time Bad Boy was unfinished, but for the first time in a long time, he felt confident he could finish a song. And there was more where that came from. He could feel the songs, the stories he wanted to tell, building up and taking on weight in the back of his head and the depths of his heart. While making coffee, he’d used the back of a grocery list, the sides of a gas receipt, and an envelope from some junk mail to make notes on three new songs. His notebook was upstairs and he’d been too desperate to get the words down to take the time to go retrieve it. That was a good feeling, one of the best someone like him could have.
The glass door opened and he turned to see Daisy step out onto the deck. He set his cup on the table and greeted her with a kiss, folding her into his arms. “Good morning.”
“Hi,” she said nervously, not quite meeting his eyes.
He tipped her chin up so she couldn’t avoid his gaze. “Okay, let’s have it.”
“What?” She tried to back out of his embrace but he wouldn’t let her.
“You’re no good at playing coy. Just speak your mind, it’s okay.”
Daisy was quiet for a moment before answering. “I don’t know if I should leave or stay. I don’t know what you want. This isn’t like anything I’ve done before. Nothing with you has been like anything I’m used to when it comes to dating.”
“I want you to stay,” he said. “If you think you want to leave, I’ll try to talk you into staying but I’m not going to beg or force the issue. I want you to want to be here.” And he wanted that a hell of a lot, more than he was really comfortable admitting, but he didn’t want to pressure her, especially with her already nervous.
This time when she pulled out of his arms he let her go. “I want to stay,” she said. “I just think maybe it’s not a good idea.”
His spirits soared and sank from one sentence to the next. He pulled out a chair for her. “Talk to me.”
She stared at the chair and crossed her arms over her front in a manner that seemed more self-protective than anything else. “I think it’s best I go.”
“I wish you would talk to me. No matter what it is, just tell me what you’re thinking.”
Daisy opened her mouth to speak. His cell phone rang, cutting her off. Wade cursed as he picked up the phone and looked at the caller ID. It was Becky. He pressed ignore and faced Daisy. “Will you tell me why you don’t want to stay?”
“I need to walk away before it gets too hard. Before it hurts too much.”
He stepped toward her and she moved back. “I can’t be cool about this,” she said. “Last night I thought I could, and be okay with just a night or two. But this morning everything feels different and I don’t like that.”
“Daisy.”
“I don’t expect anything from you. We didn’t talk about this until now. I’m not mad and I don’t think you led me on or anything like that. I just need to get out before I get in over my head.”
Wade froze, because he didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what he wanted past this summer. Even if he did have an inkling, he didn’t know if he could be that man again. He’d screwed it up so badly the first time. So he stood frozen in place while some deep instinct screamed at him that he should have been talking, should have been taking her in his arms and kissing her. He ignored that instinct, and felt the moment and all of its possibility pass by.
A knock loud enough to reach the deck came from the front door. Daisy took it as her chance to flee. “I’ll see you around, Wade.” She hurried down the steps and to the side of the house where she’d parked her car.
Run. Go get her. That instinct screamed again but Wade only stood there. Finally the pounding from the door got to be too much and he stalked into the house. His mother and Chris were on the other side of the door.
Great. Just what he needed.
***
Daisy did her best to focus on groceries and chores and her usual Sunday routine, but it didn’t work. All she could think about was Wade. She tried to convince herself that the amazing sex was the only reason, but in the privacy of her own thoughts she couldn’t lie. Everything about him was amazing, even the things he thought were faults. He’d gotten under her skin when she wasn’t looking. Though, if she had to pinpoint a likely time when she’d fallen hard and fast for him, she’d point to that night under the stars.
Wade had blown her expectations out of the water that night. Two years of celibacy and a wild attraction to him had finally broken down her resolve, and she went with him expecting a hot one night stand. Instead, he’d given her the most romantic night of her life. She smiled now at the thought of his guitar shaped constellations, and how the music he loved so dearly served as guideposts for his life.
What kind of song would he write about their time together? Something bittersweet and fleeting, perhaps. Daisy would never regret their short time together but she knew that would be all they had. He was far too talented to give up performing. If that song last night was any indication, he’d started writing again and that had to mean he wanted to record again. Wade wasn’t going to walk away from his career for her, and she’d never ask him to do that. But she didn’t want a long distance relationship. She didn’t want to be the girlfriend left back at home while he went out on the road. She didn’t want to go out on the road with him, either. She wanted a real home, and stability. After the chaotic way she grew up, she needed that. It was what she’d been working toward since the first day she signed up for college classes.
That was without even considering telling him about her past. Every time she thought of Empty Rooms and what it must cost him to have that kind of pain exposed to the world, her heart ached for him. She didn’t know how she could ever tell him of her decision to give a child up for adoption. He’d wanted his child. She gave hers away. How could she ask him to understand that? Her own mother couldn’t understand it. If her own mother couldn’t love and respect her, because of that decision she’d made at eighteen, how could anyone else?
For years, Daisy had been telling herself it was enough that she understood her decision. That she stood by it and respected herself for it. That didn’t feel true anymore. As much as she wanted Wade’s acceptance, she hated it that a part of her needed it if she was going to be with him.
She shut off the vacuum to find her cell phone buzzing with a voice mail alert. Caller ID told her it was Wade. She considered not listening, but couldn’t bring herself to ignore him. He’d done nothing wrong. They were too different, and wanted different things in life. That didn’t make him a bad guy.
“Hey, it’s me. I’d really like to talk to you. See, the thing is, even if you don’t want to be with me, I could really use a friend right now. I’ve got some things I’m trying to figure out and I need to talk to someone. And I like talking to you. You get me, Daisy. You understand me and you don’t judge me and I really need that right now.” He paused for a long moment and she waited for the message to click off. “I am probably going to try to get you back into bed. Just thought I should be honest.” Even over the phone, the deep rumble of his
laugh sent shivers dancing up and down her spine.
Daisy saved the message and left her phone on the kitchen table. She wrapped the vacuum cord back up and put the vacuum away. All the usual chores were now done. If she was going to keep at it, she’d have to get into deep cleaning mode. Might as well, she thought. At least she’d be doing something useful while thinking nonstop about Wade. Kitchen first. She started with the cabinets, clearing them one by one to clean and going through the items, throwing out anything past date.
He really had opened up to her. She’d noticed it almost right away, but didn’t understand it. Why her? Why did he feel comfortable enough with her to do that? And why couldn’t she do the same? A part of her wanted to. There were things she didn’t even talk to Megan about, though lately that had as much to do with not wanting to burden her friend. The temptation to open up to Wade was enormous, but fear kept her from doing it. He wasn’t going to be there for her long-term, so why risk it? Why risk his likely rejection?
She heard a vehicle on her gravel driveway and looked out the kitchen window to see who it was. By the time she got her hands washed and half dry, Wade was at the front door. She hurried to open it, not sure what to say.
He stepped inside and pulled her into a kiss without a word. Good sense vanished under a wave of fierce hunger. Everything she’d been so worried about all day long melted away to nothing as they tumbled to the couch in a tangle of limbs and half removed clothing. She ran her fingers through his chest hair, heat pooling low in her body as he kissed and nibbled an abstract pattern on her neck.
“I came here to talk, I swear.” He slid his hand under her t-shirt, the calloused pads of his fingers a silky-rough tease on her skin.
“I believe you,” she said. “We can talk all you want.” She tried to be good. Really, she did. All she had to do was gently push him off of her and she knew he would respect that. One word, and this would stop. But she didn’t want it to stop. She didn’t want to stop touching him, kissing him, loving him. So she didn’t. “Later.” She cupped his face in her hands and pressed her lips to his. She ran her tongue along the seam of his lips and he opened his mouth for her. Their tongues danced and played and stoked the desire already burning hot in her.
Letting go of him was going to hurt like hell, but for right now she held on tight.
“Tell me what you want.” His breath fanned across her neck as he whispered. “I’ll give you anything, baby.”
The erotic promises he’d made her echoed in her head. She knew exactly what she wanted. He’d given her beautiful and romantic last night. Now she wanted hot and dirty. It took her a moment to find her voice.
“You said you’d fuck me hot and hard,” she said.
His body tensed above her. “I believe against the wall was mentioned.”
Daisy brought her leg up slowly to wrap around his. “What if I had something else in mind?” Why was it so hard to just say it? To tell him what she liked? What she wanted? She wanted to be able to just say it, instead of having to work up to it. Wade wasn’t some insecure jerk who would try to make her feel ashamed of her desires, mock her for them, use them as an excuse to treat her badly. She was sure of that about him but still hesitated.
“I told you I’d give you anything and I meant it.” He caressed her cheek. “Just tell me.”
She licked her lips. “I want it from behind. Hard. Deep. Fingers on my clit while you fuck me. Hold me in place. Don’t treat me like I’m made of glass.”
It had been tempting to look away or shut her eyes while voicing her desires. Now she was glad she hadn’t. The play of emotions across his face amazed her. Shock, the good kind. Intense arousal. A darkly sexual triumph in his narrowed eyes, as if he was proud she’d thought him worthy of sharing something so secret. Determination in the set of his mouth.
“I’ll treat you like a woman,” he said. “And I’ll give you exactly what you want.” He sat up to rest on his knees, hands at the fly of his jeans. “Where?” His voice was rough, scratching her in all the right places.
The sight of him like that nearly made her moan. “Here.” Her own voice shook and she almost laughed from nervousness. “Let me...let me go get a condom.”
He undid his jeans then reached for her. “Hurry. When you come back, don’t be wearing anything you don’t want ripped off of you.” He kissed her, his lips bruising and hard and so fucking good she hated to pull away.
But she did, because she so very much wanted him to give her what she asked for. He slapped her ass as she stepped away, hard. The delicious sting traveled straight to her pussy. She whirled, smiling. “Think you can get away with that now, huh?”
His brown eyes were black with desire. “I said hurry.”
That commanding tone drove her crazy, made her want to disobey just to see what he’d do. Maybe another time. Right now, she had another purpose. Shedding clothes as she went, she rushed to the bathroom and dug through a drawer for the condoms she’d bought after agreeing to that first real date with him. She ran back with a foil packet clutched tightly in one hand, not giving a single fuck how eager she appeared, because damn it, she was eager.
Wade stood gloriously naked in the middle of her living room. His cock jutted out thick and hard, the mushroom head dark and glistening with pre-come. At the sight of it she added something else to her fantasy.
Without a word she dropped to her knees in front of him and took his cock in her hand, the condom slipping out of the other to fall to the floor. He was hot and silky under her fingers.
He swayed a little and shoved his hands in her hair. “This is about giving you what you want.”
She looked up at him, smiling. “Your cock is what I want.” She licked the tip, flattening her tongue against him.
“God damn.”
Warm flesh, a little salty, and a taste uniquely Wade. She stroked the root of his penis as she took the end in her mouth, humming with pleasure. His breath caught, his hands tightening their grip on her head. She glanced up again to see his eyes half closed, his face a portrait of absolute bliss. Knowing she’d put that look on his face broke something open inside her. What little bit of hesitation might have still lurked fled, and she gave herself over completely to the experience.
No artful teasing, no slow and steady climb. She sucked until her cheeks hollowed, working her mouth up and down his length over and over. He swelled even harder, and feeling him grow larger sent the walls of her pussy trembling. She stroked his thigh with one hand, then moved them both to cup his ass.
The invitation was there, she just didn’t know if he would take it.
The answer came soon enough. He rocked his hips, pushing his cock into her mouth. He had control now. She’d given it to him. He rocked again, fucking her mouth. His cock went right to the edge of what she could handle. She gripped him to keep herself steady, humming and nodding so he would know she was okay.
Wade murmured her name as he stroked her hair, the touch so tender it should have been at odds with the dirtiest, hottest foreplay she’d ever had, but for some reason it felt so right. He rocked into her several more times, controlling his thrusts so he didn’t go too deep.
The lights were still on. The curtains were open. She couldn’t remember if she’d locked the door. She didn’t care. No way was she stopping this.
He pulled her up and grabbed the condom from the floor, his cock releasing from the suction of her mouth with a pop. Her lips felt full and used, and he shaped them with his own. He slicked his tongue into her mouth, drugging her with his rough kisses and his big hands on her body and his hard, wet cock pressed against her belly. She wound her arms his neck, needing his solid form to hold on to. The hair on his chest was soft on her nipples and she pressed her breasts against him. He spanned her lower back with his hands, kneading the flesh there and on her ass. His mouth traveled from hers to her neck, her throat, her collarbone, his stubble abrading her skin.
Wade led her back to the couch and turned her around, non
e too gently. Both of them were breathing heavily. It was the only sound in the room, though it wouldn’t have surprised her if he could have heard the pounding of her heart. Excitement rushed through her veins as he arranged her body – knees on the couch cushions, hands on the back, spread and open for him.
He settled at her back, his knees just inside hers, his cock nestled in the cleft of her ass. She pushed back against him, wanting his heat and his hardness. He wrapped one hand around her throat, applying just enough pressure to still her movement.
“I got something you want?” His breath was hot in her ear, his voice a deep growl.
“Yes.” The word was a plea.
“Tell me.” He skated the fingertips of his other hand down her front, teasing her nipples. “I want to hear you say it again.”
Her body tightened with need. She squeezed the cushion at the back of the couch. “Your cock.” He moved his hand lower, brushing lightly over the hair at the apex of her thighs. “Deep. Hard.” He dipped his index finger lower, lower, circling her clit. His touch tore a gasp from her and she bucked against his hold.
He removed his hand from her throat and trailed his fingers down her back. “Are you wet for me, Daisy?”
“Yes.”
“Say it.”
“I’m wet for you. Oh God, Wade, I’m wet for you.”
His hands left her body. The sound of the condom wrapper tearing made her whimper. She beat her fist on the back of the couch and let out a strangled cry. She wanted to order him, beg, plead, but she was past words right then.
He pushed her back lower against the cushions. The head of his cock notched against her seam, tormenting her for mere seconds that felt like forever. Then he plunged into her in one swift, deep thrust. She sobbed in relief and dropped her forehead to the cushion, her hair a curtain around her.
His lips were a hot brand on the top of her spine. “Tell me again how you want me to fuck you, baby.”
Daisy hummed. “You just want to hear me talk dirty.” She pushed her ass against him, trying to get him to move.