by V L Moon
“What’s not to like? You’re worrying over nothing. Mom never gave up on you, none of us did. She loves you. Always has. Just cut yourself some slack. You’ll see once you meet her. She’s great, and boy can she cook.” Tobias smiled as he spoke of their mother. His love was clear; it was written all over his face.
“Did she mind? About you and Roman? What about your pack? What about the vampires? Did Roman have any trouble when you guys…well, you know, when you got together?” Khad wanted to know.
Growing up under Trenton’s brutal hand, a wolf learned very early to never to make their feelings known, especially if those feelings were for another male. Tobias laughed as he placed an arm across Khad’s shoulders and pulled him in against his side.
“Even if mom or Romy’s clan did mind, it wouldn’t have made a blind bit of difference. I love him, and he sure as shit loves me. Besides, I don’t think any vampire would dare oppose us, not with Malachi and Laziel being so out and proud. Then, there’s Arial and Bastian. Boy, wait until you see those two together. Bastian is the son of Lucifer, and yeah as in Satan. He’s a member of Malachi’s court.
“Arial…Arial, is a real badass. He’s Fallen, but totally loyal to Malachi and Laziel. Malachi even trusts Arial with his and Laziel’s daughter.” Tobias’s grinned widened. “You should see her, she’s the cutest thing and so sweet. She has the vampire king totally wrapped around her finger.” Tobias rattled out names and details that left Khad totally mesmerized.
“Wait, hold up. Laziel and Malachi have a kid? How? Did they adopt?” Khad had to ask. His curiosity was getting the better of him.
“Nope, she’s theirs. Laziel and Malachi are the biological fathers. Laziel is…well Laz is Laz. Apparently, and this is just between us, he’s the last of his kind, unique. He’s a Seraphim angel, a warrior and the son of the Creator. He’s a little more unique than we all thought. Sure as hell surprised everyone when he gave birth to Destahny.”
“But God, those two together. It’s like nothing you’ve ever seen before. That angel is so smitten and Malachi, despite all of his anger and volatile outbursts, melts after a simple look from Laziel. It’s crazy, but it works. Is that how it is between you and Shay?” Tobias asked, causing Khad to splutter and blush.
“What? No. We’re just friends.” He tried to explain, but the lump in his throat made it difficult to get his words out.
“Does Shaver know that?” Tobias bumped shoulders with him. “I know I haven’t been here long, but I would have sworn you guys were an item. I know without a doubt that he’s worried about you leaving and staying away. What about you? Are you happy with just being friends or do you want more?” A huge grin split Tobias’ face. The fucker knew. They had only just met and already Tobias had him figured out.
“Doesn’t matter what I want. Shaver isn’t gay.” Khad sighed.
“But you are?”
“I don’t know what I am. I’ve always gotten my kicks wherever I could; equal opportunity sort of thing. Males, females, human, wolf, none of them mean anything. It doesn’t really matter because none of them are him. Every time I meet someone, it’s his face I see, his hands I feel, his lips I kiss.” Khad dropped his head in his hands.
“Maybe leaving will help, but I doubt it. It’s always been him. I’ve never wanted anyone else, and never will,” Khad replied. He didn’t understand the whys, but talking to his brother was easier than he’d thought it would be. Words tumbled out of his mouth, regardless of how embarrassed he was or how vulnerable they made him feel. He just couldn’t stop himself.
“Have you ever asked Shaver what he wants, or how he feels?”
Khad shook his head. He’d never had that kind of courage. Any type of rejection from Shaver would tear him apart.
“Well, maybe you should. I think you might be surprised at his answer.” Tobias winked and inclined his head toward the bar where Shaver stood watching them.
“No time like the present, kiddo. What’s the worst he can do? Say no? I don’t think so. Now, go get your male. Dad and I will come by to pick you up right around dusk when Roman wakes up from the Sole Dormire. Shaver’s more than welcome to come with us if you think he would.” Tobias hugged him tight and kissed the top of his head. Khad gave in to the urge to return the hug and wrapped both arms around Tobias. Something inside of him shifted into alignment; a connection reformed.
“Did I tell you how much I love having such an awesome big brother? Thanks, T.”
“It’s good to be a big brother again. I missed you.” Khad grinned when Tobias ruffled his hair and scooted out of the booth.
Khad’s attention was immediately drawn back to Shaver as he made his way toward Khad’s booth. The slow roll of his hips did nothing to relieve the tension that crippled Khad every time he looked into those beautiful baby blue eyes.
~*~*~*~
“The two of you have the same smile.” Shaver slid into the booth opposite of Khad and tossed a dishcloth on the table. “The family resemblance is startling.”
“It’s so weird to hear that.” Khad spoke to the table, avoiding Shaver’s eyes. It didn’t take any kind of pack link to know something was troubling Khad. And with their bond, Shaver received a double whammy of Khad’s agitation.
Uncomfortable silence stretched between them. Khad reached for the discarded cloth and folded it into squares. “You’ve been avoiding me.”
Shaver ducked his head and cleared his throat. “Your family is really happy they found you. Alexa says she can feel their happiness radiating around them.”
“Shaver, I need to tell you…”
“That you’re leaving?” Shaver shrugged his shoulders to hide the trembling in his hands. He focused his attention on a chipped corner in the tile floor. “I already know that. It’s your family. It’s where you belong.” He was amazed the shaking in his soul didn’t vibrate in his words.
Shaver was terrified that Khad wasn’t ever going to come back. As the son of the Summus, his days of hiding and fear were over and done. Shaver had listened to Tobias’s and Roman’s stories with dread and a lot of heartbreak. The world would be at Khad’s feet. With his looks and charm, he’d be a highly sought after mate. What could Shaver offer him? Why would he come back to an island in the middle of the wilderness where he’d known pain and fear?
A warm familiar hand slid over his white knuckled fists. The contact nearly shattered Shaver into a million agonized neurons.
“Shay, I have to go. I need to look into my mother’s eyes.”
“Of course you do.” Shaver forced himself to lift his head and meet Khadlyn’s eyes. The ache in his chest spasmed. Shaver choked back a sob and rose to his feet. He tugged free of Khad’s touch. “You better go and pack. I’ve got to make a run to the island and take mom a few supplies. I’ll see you around.”
Khad stood up and blocked his path. “Will you be back to say goodbye?”
Shaver’s throat closed. Tears blinded him. He nodded and made a run for the door. He needed to get away before he lost his shit, fell down on his knees and begged the male to stay.
Outside the back door, he stripped quickly and started his shift. When he opened his eyes, Damian’s black wolf stood beside him.
I don’t need company.
Alexa says you do.
Shaver didn’t bother to argue. It was a lost cause. With an irritated chuff, he turned his back on his babysitter and raced through the back alleys and streets to the lakeshore. He hadn’t lied to Khad. He did need to take supplies to his mom and dad, but it could wait until after the Chamberlin family departed for their pack lands. When his paws hit the sand, he sprinted full out, knowing he couldn’t outrun the fact Khad was leaving him.
Hours passed. Damian stayed at his side though they didn’t speak. They splashed through the surf, sun dried on the frigid rocks and ran until their sides heaved. They arrived back at Iniquity just as the sun’s blush kissed the horizon. Shaver reverted to human form and dressed. He could hear the boisterous fa
rewell party in the bar. He turned back to the exit and ran face first into Damian’s chest.
“Do the right thing, Shay. You know he has to do this. He deserves this time after everything he’s been through.”
Shaver leaned into Damian and let the male take his weight when he sagged. “I want this for him, Dame. I so want him to have the family he has always dreamed about, but I thought it would be…” Shaver swallowed the last part of the sentence.
“You? You thought you would be his family.”
Shaver nodded against that wide chest. “It’s selfish. I can’t even work up the courage to tell him I love him; yet, I expect him to choose me over them. What a dumbass, eh?”
“Shay, he’s going to come back here. Trust me.”
Pushing away from his friend, Shaver shook his head. “I wish I had your optimism. There’s so much out there for him. His father is the Summus, friends with the vampire king. He’s harboring and training Nephilim. Khad’s future is out there; his destiny is out there.”
“But, his heart is here, Shaver. Deep down you know that.”
The door from the bar area swung open. Alexa’s redhead poked through. “Come on you two. Jorn’s impatient to get on the road. Envoys from the vampire king are there with the Nephilim and he needs to meet with them.”
Shaver dug the heels of his hands into his eyes. Suck it up, buttercup. No tears. Be strong. You can fall apart after he leaves. Shaver took a bracing breath and followed Alexa back into the main area. Wolves reclined in the booths and against the bar. Khad stood in the middle of the cleared dance floor wrapped tight in one of Alexa’s famous hugs. When she moved away, Damian stepped past Shaver to embrace Khad. Soft words were spoken between the two of them and then, nothing stood between him and Khadlyn.
Shaver wanted to hide, wanted more to throw up, but most of all, he wanted to march across the short distance and kiss the wolf he loved. Aware of every eye in the room, Shaver took the first step in Khad’s direction. A few more and he stood in front of Khad. He looked into the eyes he knew as well as he knew his own and every need or want he had vanished. Khad was scared. It was there in his gaze as clearly as if he spoke the words aloud.
Shaver lifted a hand and skimmed his knuckles over Khad’s jawline. A baseball sized lump formed in his throat when Khad turned into the touch and nuzzled his palm with his nose.
“I’m so happy for you, Khadlyn. Your nightmares are over. Your dreams have come to claim you. You’re going to meet your mother, see your true home. The world is waiting for you. Show them that those bastards didn’t break you.”
Shaver’s hand fell back to his side. His breath faltered and his heart thudded hard against his ribs.
“Goodbye, Khad. Be safe and take care of yourself.”
Leaning in, he brushed his lips lightly over Khad’s mouth. I love you. He screamed the words inside his head. With a shaky smile, he stepped back and then turned away. Every step away from Khad was torture. He made it all the way to the storage room before he simply could not take another step. He sank to the floor and buried his face in his hands. The tears refused to fall. Noises filtered through the doors and walls. He knew the moment, Khad left Iniquity. Then, the tears found their release.
~*~*~*~
Chapter Fifty-Four
~*~*~*~
Virginia
Khad’s cheeks felt frozen in place from all the grinning he’d done. His eyes were red from crying. His back and ribs ached from the constant stream of hugs and backslaps he’d received when he returned to his family’s pack lands. He was home, the place he’d never believed he would actually see. All of his life, Khad had owned the hollow ache inside him, never knowing who he really was or where he belonged. It had been meeting Shaver, Alexa and Damian that showed him not all families were born of blood. Love came in many different guises.
It had been less than twenty-four hours since he’d last seen them and he missed them already. The knot in his chest refused to go away. Just thinking about Shaver tightened the grip around his heart. Thank God for Tobias and Roman. His brother and his mate had done their best to entertain him throughout the flight to Virginia while his father was busy on the phone.
The tension on his father’s face softened each time he met Khad’s wary gaze, and then another call would come in to claim his attention. He supposed being the Summus burdened Jorn with little time for himself. However, all of that changed once they stepped onto their own land. Jorn never left his side. He introduced Khad to everyone by name and pointed to the wolves flanking them as they made their way inland toward the family home.
Khad was blown away by his father’s leadership skills, and the level of respect shown toward him as alpha and Summus. Everything about the way his father ruled was a far cry from the life he’d led under Trenton’s tyranny. No wonder Alexa cried, no wonder Damian was so angry and Shaver so shy. Khad could clearly see within minutes the vast differences between their packs.
“Don’t worry, son. Trenton will pay for the crimes he’s committed against those he swore to protect. I do not take my duty as Summus lightly. I’ve given Alexa and Damian a clear field to address his crimes in any way they see fit. Rest assured, I am aware of and will be keeping a close eye on things. Aid is on the way as we speak, so please, enjoy your time here with your family and allow your mother to spoil you. You both deserve it.”
A heavy arm came to rest across Khad’s shoulders. His father pulled him against his side. Khad had never thought of himself as small, but standing beside his father, Khad realized he had some ways to go before he’d ever be strong enough or big enough to walk in those footsteps.
~*~*~*~
His mother’s tears soaked through his shirt as Khad held her against him. His body trembled as his own tears ran unabashed down his cheeks. She was so beautiful, he would have never guessed her to be near her sixtieth year. He’d have thought her to be in her late thirties, except Tobias was that age and could pass for a teenager. It appeared their genes held them in good favor with their hair and looks coming predominantly from their mother’s side and their height and build from their father’s ancestors.
Soft snuffles and a teary eyed smile followed another round of gentle hugs. His mother’s emotions were off the charts, but the love in her eyes and the gentle sweep of her thumb against his face replaced the last seventeen years without her. She was there, and Khad took advantage by hugging her again just because he could.
He had a mom and a dad and one hell of a big brother. And then, there was Sage who stood to the side of the group with her own parents. They doted over her, constantly holding her fragile form and guiding her as though she was made of glass. Sage simply smiled. She looked more than content with being back on pack land with her family and free of the male responsible for ruining both of their lives.
His father’s pack was enormous with the number of homesteaded wolves easily running well over the six hundred mark. But to his amazement, the Appalachian stronghold could easily hold more. Tobias had explained on the plane that there was well over two hundred communities dotted along the Appalachian range. All of them lived happily under Jorn’s alpha status and received education, training, medical care and aid in whatever form was needed. According to pack lore, Jorn was the most successful Summus in the history of the wolves, due to his strength and wisdom. Khad couldn’t help the sense of pride that filled him on learning that.
With his mother leading the way, Khad was given the tour of their home. Each room was immaculately clean while remaining warm and welcoming. It was homey, with oversized sofas, chairs, quilts and cushions. A gallery of pictures of his parents, Tobias, Sage and many of the other wolves from their pack decorated the walls. But, what really caught Khad’s attention was the central collage of a young child with huge blue eyes.
Some of the pictures were of him on his own, however most of them were taken surrounded by wolves, and family. He recognized Sage. She held a smiling younger version of him in her lap as she looked
across to Tobias. His brother was laughing with his head thrown back. It was so surreal seeing himself as a child. It hurt that he couldn’t remember so much of his life, but he’d belonged. At least now, he knew he’d been loved and missed instead of abandoned as Trenton had always suggested.
“We have loads more whenever you want to see them.” His mother pointed to the far wall of the study where floor to ceiling shelves held a vast array of albums.
“Thank you. Do you have one of all of us, one that I could send to Shaver? He’d be so stoked to see me as a kid.” Khad laughed knowing he was giving Shaver, Alexa and Damian some well-meant ammunition when he returned, but they mattered to him beyond the fun and laughs. They always would.
The rest of the tour was as Khad expected. Kitchen, bathrooms…until he came to the room next to the one his parents shared. He knew by the way his mother’s posture faltered that it was going to be weird. He pushed open the door and stared at the walls, at the toys that still lined the shelves alongside the books and mementoes. From the look of it, nothing had been touched or moved from its place. His clothes still hung in the closet and his shoes were still placed beneath the foot of his bed, a bed laden with gifts and cards.
“There’s one for each birthday and Christmas, and as Tobias got older, his gifts were placed here too. We never forgot you, baby boy. Not a day passed that you weren’t in my thoughts. I’ve lived that day over and over. We trusted Khurn, and he even joined in the search.” Tears broke through his mother’s words. The pain of her loss was so hard to see.