Forbidden Rider: A Lost Saxons Novel #5

by Ames, Jessica

  “Look, this thing between me and Piper, we didn’t know where it was going. We didn’t want to put it out there ‘til we knew what we had because we knew you’d flip about it.”

  Josh shakes off Weed. The brother lets him go, but stays close, a watchdog, ready to leap into action.

  “You said she’s yours, Jem. That implies you know exactly where it’s going.”

  Despite the situation, this makes me feel warm.

  “Yeah, well, I knew I wanted her from the start, but your sister’s got hurt in the past so I had to tread carefully.” Jem scrubs a hand over his jaw. “When Cami told me she’d been abducted it was like my whole fucking world was gone, Wade.”

  My heart soars at this and I have no idea what to think. His gaze comes to me as he says it. “You’re my world, Piper. Angel, without you life doesn’t make sense. You’re mine.”

  I swallow and then I nod, accepting, knowing, because it’s the same for me.

  I watch the anger drain from Josh’s face. “You both could have told me at any point you were starting shit. I thought there was something going on at Weed’s birthday, but Paige told me nothing was happening, made me think I was being paranoid.”

  “Paige was wrong,” Jem says.

  “Before that?”

  “Yeah.”

  “How long before?”

  “Officially… not until she went back to Manchester, but really, it started while you were in the hospital.”

  He scrubs a hand over his face. “Fuck.”

  “I love him,” I say, speaking for the first time. “I love Jem with everything I have. He says I’m his, but he’s mine too. And I’m sorry I lied, Josh. I’m more sorry than you can know, but I was terrified of losing you, of losing Jem, too. And I hope I haven’t lost you now because I love you as well. You’re my big brother, and I know we don’t have the easiest relationship, but I only have one big brother. I’m just starting to get to know you, and I like having you in my life. I don’t think I want to have a life without you in it.”

  I pause, taking a shaky breath, readjusting my grip on the door frame before I continue, “I don’t have a lot of people in my world that care about me. My own stepfather threw me to the wolves. My mother would rather let a man hurt me to keep her position in society. My father… well, you know all about him, Josh, and the kind of man he is. I need my brother in my life. I want my brother in my life.” My words choke me and I have to swallow to regain control. “Please don’t leave me again, Josh. You promised me you wouldn’t walk away again no matter what happened. Don’t break that promise.”

  He scrubs a hand over his face, then says, “Fuck. I’m not going anywhere.”

  Only he does go somewhere. He closes the space between us, and he pulls me into his arms and my brother hugs the crap out of me.

  “Fucking hell,” Weed mutters. “This is way too chick-flick for me. I’m going to get a beer.”

  When I pull back, everyone has disappeared, even Jem, although he’s only gone as far as the end of the corridor, giving me and Josh space to talk, but staying close enough in case I need him.

  “I’m pissed you lied,” Josh says. “No lies between us, Piper. You tell me the truth, even if it’s hard to tell.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Josh sighs and glances up the corridor to where Jem is standing, waiting for us. He gives my brother a daft grin and I have to bite my lip to stop from laughing at him. Josh doesn’t seem amused.

  “As much as I hate the idea of you with a brother, at least I know you’re taken care of. When Jem found out you’d been taken, nothing was stopping him from getting you back. He’ll always fight for you. I can’t see any civilian guy doing that.”

  “I do love him.”

  “Yeah, I can see that, although, I think you’re fucking crazy.” His lips lift a little.

  “I think I’m probably crazy too. He drives me insane.”

  My brother scans my face, his brow drawn down. “I’m so fucking glad you’re okay, Pipe.”

  I’m glad I’m okay too, and I’m starting to think things might actually work out.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  The drive back to Kingsley seems to take forever. The Devils lend us a trailer so Jem can get his bike back. Jem drives the car, while the others ride in formation behind the vehicle, protecting us, I think. I alternate between watching Josh, Adam and Weed out of the windows and lying across the back seat when the pull of exhaustion gets too much.

  Jem talks to me as he drives, his eyes flicking between the rear-view mirror and the road. He tells me jokes, keeps things light, and I love him for it. Everything has been so serious, but I do need to know something before we get back to Kingsley. Things are happening so fast, and this might be the last time for a little while before we get a chance to talk alone.

  “Jem?”

  His eyes flick to the mirror. “Yeah, angel?”

  “What happened to Merrick?”

  His gaze goes back to the road, but I don’t miss the flash of fury in them. “You don’t need to worry about him.”

  I struggle to sit up, wincing at the pull on my bandaged ribs. Leech did a good job patching me up and sending me off with a baggie of medicines, but I’m still hurting and will likely hurt for a while yet. Once we get to Kingsley, Jem seems to think Clara can get me actual medical care at the hospital without raising any flags with the authorities. How she does this, I don’t know, but I’m not going to argue. It would be prudent to have X-rays done, considering how much of a beating I took.

  “That’s not an acceptable answer.”

  His eyes come back to the mirror and meet mine. He huffs out a breath. “He was dealt with.”

  “Meaning what?”

  “He’s no longer a problem.”

  My throat constricts and air locks behind the blockage. I know the Club isn’t exactly law abiding, it’s one of the reasons I was so against my brother being a part of it, but hearing Jem say this so blatantly makes me feel off kilter.

  “You killed him,” I surmise.

  I heard the gunfire, the screams. What else could’ve been happening?

  He doesn’t speak for a long moment. “Merrick took something that belongs to me.”

  I’m not overly thrilled with this ‘belonging’ thing, but I’m not surprised either. The other women talk often about claiming and ownership.

  “So, he is dead.”

  Jem’s eyes close for a moment. “Yeah, Piper, I fucking killed the bastard, and I’d do it again. He abducted you in broad fucking daylight, kept you captive for days, beat you, sent photographic evidence of what he was doing to you. I called Merrick, told him who you were, that you were my old lady, Wade’s sister, that you were tied into the Club—Lost Saxons property. He had chance to give you back without bloodshed. He refused.”

  I remember Perkins taking a call when I was in with Merrick. Neither of them seemed happy. Was that them learning who I was? Maybe. Then again, men like Merrick probably piss off many people.

  “He was never going to give you back whole, Piper. Merrick was making a point to Hollander about crossing lines. Your stepfather fucked up, and you would have paid the price. Merrick couldn’t back down. If he handed you over to the Club, he would have looked weak, so he had to play the game through. I wasn’t playing, though. Not with your life. So, yeah, I shot that cunt. I killed him and his men. And I don’t regret it for a second. They would have killed you without remorse to make a point.”

  I let his words sink in and I swallow back the vomit crawling up my throat. I have no idea what to do with what he’s telling me, how to handle it, but I do know he is right. If Jem hadn’t come when he did, that man would have done irreparable damage to me—damage I could never have come back from. And I have no doubt Merrick would have put a bullet in my head without a hint of remorse.

  “I’m sorry you have to hear the ugly truth here, baby, I am, but if it comes down to a choice between them or you, I’m always picking you.”

/>   “I know. I’m glad you picked me too.”

  And I mean it. Merrick and his men did horrible things to me, and Cami as well. I’m sure they’ve done worse to other women, other families.

  “Will this blow back on the Club?”

  Jem taps his fingers against the steering wheel. “Don’t you worry about that.”

  “Jem…”

  He sighs. “Merrick’s a medium sized player in town, but he’s also playing in a patch the Devils want. They were more than happy to get involved in taking him down and we were more than happy to let them keep Merrick’s territory after all was said and done.”

  It all sounds very complicated and surprisingly political.

  “Oh.”

  He pushes his hair out of his face. “You don’t need to worry, angel, it’s handled, okay?”

  I nod. “You guys don’t mess around.”

  “Not when it comes to women and kids, no. You let those fuckers think it’s okay to touch either and things get ugly. Suddenly, old ladies are getting attacked taking the kids to school or getting groceries. It can’t happen. A message needed to be sent, Piper. Merrick and his crew got that message loud and clear, and so did any other fuckers who even think about touching our families again. They want to come at us, fine. But you touch our women, our babies, we’ll destroy you.”

  The fierceness in his voice is alarming, but also understandable. When I think about Beth, Liv, his sisters… all the women in Kingsley. Any one of them getting hurt like I was would be unthinkable.

  It’s strange to see this side of him. I’m used to Jem being laid back. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen him annoyed, and I’m not naïve—I know he’s deep into the criminal world, it’s one of the reasons I was so reluctant to go there with him—but seeing it so clearly, so blatantly is surreal. I’m not sure what the heck to do with any of this. He saved me, of that I have no doubt, but he also killed people—and he doesn’t have even an inkling of guilt about it.

  Should he have?

  I don’t know.

  I hate those men for what they did to me, to Cami.

  But Jem played judge, jury and executioner…

  I stare at his broad back, at the man who risked everything for me. He threw himself into the fire to protect me. I’ve never had anyone willing to go that distance before. Jem would have laid down his life to protect mine. I see that clearly.

  Why?

  Because he loves me.

  He loves me.

  And not because he wants something from me or because he needs me, but just because he loves me.

  It’s a startling revelation and it makes my entire body physically jolt.

  I stare at him. This man would risk everything for me, and I would do the same for him.

  “Jem?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Thank you.”

  His brow furrows in the mirror. “I’ve got to say, Piper, I wasn’t expecting a thank you here.”

  “I’ve never had anyone in my life willing to stand up for me before.”

  “Well, get used to it. I’m always going to stand up for you.”

  When we get to Kingsley, it’s strange, but it feels like coming home. Driving into the clubhouse compound is a relief, even. Jem gets out and comes to the back door of the car. He opens it and helps me out. Just as well because I’m still not steady on my feet. I wrap my arms around him as soon as I’m on the ground and hug him tightly. His fingers go to my neck, as they always do.

  “I’m sorry,” I tell him.

  “For what?”

  “Everything.”

  He pulls me back. “You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, Pip. None of this shit was your fault.”

  “I should have told you what was going on with Grant and Mum.”

  Brushing my hair back from my face, he says, “Yeah, that’s your fault.” He grins. “No more secrets.”

  “No more secrets,” I agree.

  “Piper!”

  I pull back from him at the sound of my name and see my best friend half-running, half-staggering towards me.

  And my heart contracts.

  They really did a number on her. She’s battered. Her face is a swollen mess, bruised black in places and her collarbone, visible beneath the line of her sweater, is mottled purple.

  My hands fly to my face as tears threaten to fall. Not that I look much better, I’m sure. I took a heck of a beating myself.

  “Don’t you dare cry,” Cami warns me, looking on the verge of tears herself.

  “I’m not going to,” I lie.

  She pulls me into her arms and clings to me. “I thought you were a goner, P.”

  “I thought you were too,” I tell her.

  “It’ll take more than some gangster wannabes to get rid of me.”

  She steps out of the hug and roves an eye over me—or tries to. They’re swollen. I suddenly wish Jem killed those men more painfully. My beautiful, kind, funny best friend didn’t deserve this.

  “I’m so sorry, Cam.”

  “Don’t. Don’t you even go there. This isn’t on you. This…” She points to her face. “This is all Grant’s fault.”

  “If I’d told someone—”

  “The what ifs will drive you insane, darling. It’s not a game worth playing. What’s happened has happened. And you and me… we’re strong. We’ll come out the other side singing.” She squeezes my hand. “Although, don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m selling the loft. I don’t think I can go back there.”

  I don’t blame her. I don’t think I can either.

  “I’m sorry it took me so long to get you help, P. They tied me to the radiator in the utility room and gagged me so I couldn’t scream for help. It took me a while to get free.”

  Her wrists, I notice, are bandaged heavily like mine. She must have rubbed them raw to escape.

  “Don’t apologise. We’re both here, whole, breathing. That’s all that matters.”

  She glances up at Jem. “You kept your promise.”

  He squeezes my hip. “I didn’t need to promise it, Cami. I wasn’t coming back without her.”

  Cami glances at me. “I like this one. You can keep him.”

  I tut at her. “Thank you for your endorsement. I’ll take it under advisement.”

  “I’ll have you know, I’m a catch,” Jem says. “I have my own place, I cook a mean carbonara, and I can tie cherry stems with my tongue.”

  Cami stares at him a beat before saying to me, “Definitely a keeper.”

  We head inside and we’re greeted by brothers and old ladies alike. Logan steps in front of us in the foyer, his eyes scanning over his little brother, checking every inch of his face.

  “You okay?” he asks finally.

  “I am now.”

  Logan seems to understand this and nods.

  “Any problems while we were gone?” Jem asks.

  “No, but we kept the whole Club on lockdown. I wasn’t risking anyone being out there. Some of the Devils who were still here from the wedding stayed behind and helped with security, which was a blessing.”

  “Is Beth pissed you missed your honeymoon?”

  Guilt rolls through me.

  “You missed your honeymoon because of me?”

  Logan’s gaze shifts to me. “Darlin’, you can wipe that look off your face right now. Family comes first. You were in trouble and we took care of it.”

  I swallow hard. Family. Is that what I am? Josh has been telling me since I first arrived in Kingsley that I’m family. I didn’t believe him, but hearing Logan say it… it makes something unlock in my chest.

  With a sigh, Logan adds, “If I’m being honest, I think Beth was kind of relieved.”

  “Relieved? You’re going to have to explain that one to me, bro.” Jem rubs a hand over his jaw.

  “Jimmy’s barely out of the hospital, Jack’s only just back in the country after his impromptu flit, Dylan’s fuck knows where and there’s still the small matter of this Brosen dickhead. Now, you’re o
n Wade’s hit list for boning his sister,” he winces, “—sorry, Piper. Things are still really unsettled in the Club. I think she would have been worried about leaving.”

  I can understand why she would be worried, but missing her honeymoon…

  “You guys should still find time to go,” I tell him.

  Logan smiles at me and when he does, I understand why Beth is smitten. He’s very attractive—all three brothers are.

  “We will. I’ll take her somewhere special. Don’t you worry.” He turns to Jem. “Adam okay?”

  “Our little brother is fine. He’s outside with Weed.”

  I watch as the eldest Harlow brother scans an eye over my man.

  “So, you and Piper…”

  “Me and Piper.” Jem repeats it lightly, but there is a hint of steel in his voice, a hint of challenge.

  I move closer to Jem, my hand slipping into his. The last thing I need is the Harlow brothers throwing down, but Jem’s shoulders seem to relax.

  Logan’s lips kick up at the corners. “Wade called me and asked if I’d bury him if he kicked the shit out of you.”

  Jem snorts.

  “He did what?” I demand, mortified and a little disturbed.

  Logan shrugs his huge shoulders. “I told him as long as he left you breathing it was fine.”

  I expect Jem to yell at his brother, but he just grins. “I knew I could rely on you to have my back.”

  “What did you expect me to say, Jem? You lied to Wade. That’s a shit thing you did.”

  “I know, but I didn’t risk Wade’s wrath for shits and giggles, Lo.”

  Logan runs a hand through hair that is as dark as Jem’s is fair. Looking at them, it’s hard to see they’re brothers—at least until you examine their mannerisms. Jem and Logan are a lot alike in that respect. Although both men do not share personality traits. Logan is as serious as a heart attack. Jem takes very little serious—until I got abducted.