“Bullshit, it changed you.”
“No, it brought me back to me, and that’s a good thing.”
“It’s not something I want.”
“I know.”
He looked at her. “Ever.”
“I know.”
“I want you to promise me, no matter what happens in the future, you won’t let them change me.”
She bit her lip, and again he saw the shattered girl he’d brought back from her captivity with the Indians, but then in a heartbeat that little girl went away and in her place was the woman she’d become since meeting Isaiah Jones. He’d been as good for her as she’d been for him. They were a match, Cole realized.
As he took the sheet from her, she pushed the hair off her face with her wet hand, the wet strands making a funny bump on her forehead. Any other time that would have made him smile, but this wasn’t that time.
“I want your promise, Addy. I’ve always lived my life as I wanted. That doesn’t change just because Miranda is a Reaper and all of you want another rooster in the henhouse.”
She rolled her eyes. “You make it sound like there’s a campaign going on.”
“Isn’t there?”
“I’ll admit a lot of people would feel much more comfortable if you were one of us. No question. No doubt.”
“You one of them?”
“I thought so but . . .”
“I’ve convinced you otherwise?”
“No, Miranda did.”
That was a shock. “Miranda?”
“She has a funny notion that you should always stay you, no matter what.”
Because he’d made her promise, and she was keeping her promise to back him in this. But he knew in her heart she wanted him to be Reaper.
“She knows what it’s like not to have a choice.”
“Yes, she does, but she also knows how easy it is to live with a different choice.”
“Easy? Have you seen the scars on her face, the fear in her eyes?”
“She’s a woman alone. Life is difficult for any woman alone with a child.”
“She’s not alone; she has me now.”
Addy nodded. “For how long?”
Because he chose to stay human and mortal if that were still possible. He got the point. “You have a nasty way with words, Adelaide Jones.” It was the first time he’d ever used her married name.
She smiled, acknowledging the concession. “Facts are facts. We live in a dangerous world, and this little corner of it, right now? It’s downright treacherous, but I’m not going to interfere with what you and Miranda decide is right. The same way you didn’t interfere with Isaiah and me.”
“I grumbled a bit.”
She nodded. “But you left me to be happy.”
“Sort of.”
“I know you, Cole. I knew you’d come. The last time you’d seen me, I was dead for all intents and purposes, and then Isaiah took me away. It was too much like before for you to leave it.”
“So why didn’t you stop me?”
“I don’t know. Some things people have to see for themselves, and maybe I needed to see that I could be happy as this new me before I stopped holding on to you.”
“Damn.” He tossed the sheet over the line. Addy tugged it straight on the other side.
“That is the last of the laundry, and I’m thinking that pond looks mighty inviting right now.”
He looked over in time to see Miranda toying with the buttons on her dress. “Fuck.”
“I wish you wouldn’t use that word.”
“I know. I’m working on it.”
“All we need is for Wendy to start running around saying it.”
“I don’t say it around her.”
“You don’t always know when she’s around.”
“True enough.” He was going to have to modify his language along with a lot of other things.
Miranda had her fifth button undone. Was the woman thinking she was going to swim unguarded in her chemise and pantaloons? When wet, she’d be all but naked. Addy followed his look. She didn’t say anything, but he felt her laughter stroke along his anger.
“It’s not the first time she’s gone swimming, you know.”
He didn’t take his gaze off Miranda. “Uh-huh, but she’s a Cameron now.”
She laughed. “And what’s yours stays yours?”
“Yep.” He headed toward the pond, grabbing a sheet off the line and tossing it over his shoulder as he went. “And covered up, too.”
19
As always, Miranda felt Cole’s approach before she saw him. Ankle deep in the water, she turned. She had a brief glimpse of his face and a flash of something white before she was enveloped in it. She looked down.
“I just washed this sheet.”
“Uh-huh, and I just made love to that sweet body, but it’s not like I want the whole world to see it.”
“I was just going to cool off.”
“Mmm-hmm. While everyone around you heats up.”
“Everyone does it.”
“Not my woman.” He ran his fingers from her shoulder, down her back, to the hollow of her spine, his hand opening over her ass, pressing gently, spreading the cheeks ever so slightly, sending shivers of arousal through her. Her knees went weak. He chuckled and pulled her close. “This is for my eyes only.”
Wendy turned, saw them, and giggled. Cole moved his hand to safer ground.
“You told us to swim and cool off; this is the only place we can go.”
“There is another pond farther upstream.”
“No one is allowed to go there without an escort.”
He kissed her. “Consider yourself escorted.”
“Are you sure it’s safe?” She frowned.
“You’re with a badass Cameron, how much safer can you be?”
It was hard to argue with that. “Not much.” Turning to Wendy, she called, “Get your things, honey. We’re moving to a better spot.”
Wendy splashed toward them. “Are we going to the big pond?” she asked excitedly.
“Yes.”
Wendy surged out of the water and up onto the shore; she was twenty feet ahead of them before Miranda could get a breath. “I can practice my swimming, then,” she called back excitedly.
“How far along on the practice is she?” Cole asked, scooping Miranda’s dress off the bush and holding it over her head.
“She can paddle quite well.”
When she would have let the sheet drop, he ordered, “Keep that sheet tucked around you.”
She felt obliged to point out, “This is going to be awkward.”
“Not if you tuck that sheet well and do as I say.”
It was going to be awkward even then, but she was finding sometimes it was easier to humor Cole than fight with him. Especially in his possessive moments.
“Now, hold your hands up.”
Holding her hands up like a child, she waited while he dropped her dress over her head. It was bulky and, as she predicted, wouldn’t fit over the sheet.
“At some point I’ve got to unwrap this thing, you know.”
“Hold on.”
It wasn’t like she had much choice. She felt him tugging and pulling at the skirt.
“It’s hot in here.”
“Hold on.”
He tugged some more. She grabbed the sheet, yipping when he pulled a bit of her hair.
“Sorry.”
“This isn’t going to work.”
“It’s working fine, just hold on.”
“Where’s Wendy?” She had visions of her halfway to the big pond on her own.
“Right here, Mommy.”
Another tug and Cole said, “Okay, now you can let it go.”
She peeked at him through the crack in the bodice
. “How am I supposed to do that?”
His eyes warmed with that humor that she enjoyed so much. “A bit tied up, are you?”
She tried to get her hand out of the sleeve, but the elbow got caught in the waistband. “A bit.”
He chuckled.
“I think I like you like this.”
His fingers stroked her cheek, then down over her neck, his knuckles discreetly brushing her breasts.
She gasped as a shiver of awareness went through her. Passion pushed the laughter from his eyes. “I do find I’m liking you like this.”
When she could see his eyes, the laughter still lingered there, and she liked that. He had been so serious before, but now, with her, there was laughter, too. It was a good thing.
“All tangled up?”
Passion weighted his smile. “Helpless.”
His knuckle pressed her breast again. To onlookers it would be nothing, but the contact was lightning to her, streaking from her breasts to between her legs and then back up again, leaving her wet and aching with her breath caught in her lungs.
“I’m going to look a little silly if I try to walk like this.”
“I know. I’m just contemplating the possibilities.”
She licked her lips, telling herself as a decent woman, she shouldn’t be wondering about those possibilities, but she was wondering, hard.
“You like that, don’t you?” he asked, that stern mouth of his soft with desire.
What was the point of denying it? “I do. I find you’re a very inventive man.”
His fingertips separated her lips. “And I find you a very receptive woman.”
“That’s good, right?”
He leaned down and kissed her gently, his hands sliding up under her skirts, giving the sheet a tug so it fell to the ground. “Very, very good.”
“That’s far enough, Wendy,” he called, “wait for us.”
“Hurry, then.”
Miranda closed her eyes at the blatant disrespect.
“Shades of her mother,” Cole grinned.
“Are you saying I’m bossy?”
“I’m saying you know what you like. As long as you continue to like me, I’m not going to have an argument with it.” He caught her hand and dragged her forward. “Now come on.”
“What about the sheet? We can’t just leave it there in the mud.”
“Sure we can. It’s not like anybody else is going to claim it.”
“Sheets are rare.”
“Muddy ones need cleaning. Trust me, it will be there when we get back.”
She supposed he was right. There was enough hard work around the camp that no one was going to pick up extra. The sheet could wait. She pinched Cole’s butt.
She turned and skipped backward ahead of him. “Then what are you waiting for?”
His fingers squeezed hers, and one of his rare smiles spread across his face, a real smile, the kind that brought the sun out inside her.
Catching up with her, he kissed her quickly. “Not a goddamn thing.”
* * *
Though Miranda had never told anyone, she’d never liked the big pond. She didn’t know why. The walk through the copse of trees was pretty shady and picturesque, and it could have been the subject matter of any painting hanging in any of the fancy homes back East, but every time she walked into these woods, a ghost walked over her grave. Wendy skipping ahead, whacking the trees as she skipped passed, didn’t feel any of her mother’s unease. Neither did Cole, but no matter how she tried to focus on the beauty, the sense of unease wouldn’t pass.
The pond was barely an eighth of a mile from the campsite, secluded by this little strip of woods. It wasn’t far enough away to be scary, but it was far enough away to be isolated, which, based on the squeeze of Cole’s hand on her ass, was part of its appeal for him. What he thought they could get up to with her daughter running around she had no idea, but if there was something, a shiver of arousal went down her spine, she was sure Cole would find it.
When his hand dropped to his side, she slipped hers into his, feeling his start of surprise. And she realized rather sadly, she didn’t touch him that much. She’d have to fix that, because he was always touching her and it always made her feel good. And he deserved to feel good, too. If this was going to be more than just a now thing, then she had to start acting like it.
Leaning over, she bit his upper arm. The growl that rumbled from his throat found its way to her. She closed her eyes briefly as the sound sank into her consciousness. He was as affected by her as she was by him. They were, she realized, vulnerable to each other, and there was safety in that, comfort in that, security in that.
She hugged his arm. He pulled it away, and for a minute she thought she’d gone too far, until he put his arm around her shoulder and tucked her into his side. That bit of unease that had haunted her as soon as she stepped in the woods slipped away. The storm that threatened wasn’t here yet. She had now, and it was good.
He dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “You worry too much.”
“Some things just bring the ghosts walking over my grave.”
“I don’t want you having bad thoughts.”
“You can’t stop them.”
He cocked an eyebrow at her. “I could order you not to have them.”
She smiled. “And I could promise not to let you know.”
“Hurry up, hurry up,” Wendy called.
Cole sighed. “We’d better hurry before she gets out of sight.”
Her heart sank. “Do you think there’s trouble?”
“No, but there’s no telling what that girl could get up to. She’s got a spirit of adventure about as big as the sky.”
“I know. It scares me.”
He looked at her. “Why?”
“Because I don’t think she’ll be content being in this world.”
“You mean the Reaper world?”
She nodded.
“There’s nothing to say she has to stay with the Reapers.”
“They won’t let her leave.”
“It’s not their choice.”
“You don’t understand.”
“I understand. A lot of people want a lot of things. A lot of people want diamonds. A lot of people want gold. Wanting it doesn’t make it possible to have it.”
“But what if she falls in love?”
“With a Reaper?”
She nodded.
“Then that’s the man she’ll choose, and that’s the life she’ll choose, but I’m thinking any man that tries to tame that spirit is going to know what he’s getting into, and he’s probably not going to be the kind of man who wants to smother it.”
“Do you think so?”
He looked down at her, and again there was that assessing look in his gaze that always made her wonder what he was thinking. “Not all men want to crush what they can’t control.”
She licked her lips and asked the question that often haunted her. “Do you want to control me?”
“This isn’t the place for that conversation.”
She supposed he was right. Wendy was likely to come back any second wanting their attention. She didn’t have many playmates, and Cole was a new force in her life. She seemed to be jealous of his time. Miranda hoped that would lessen, but she wasn’t sure.
“But, no” he said, catching her attention as they reached the edge of the water. “I don’t want to control you. Not like you’re fearing.”
She supposed that was some consolation, but his statement left a large area of conjecture as to just what he wanted to do with her, and she hated that instant of fear that whipped through her. Flashes of her attack snapped into her mind, mean faces, hurting faces, claws tearing at her skin.
“Miranda.” Cole’s voice called her back. She realized he was cupping her face in his hand, a
nd his breath was soft on her skin. As he leaned in, his lips touched her in the gentlest of caresses, and within the slight contact she felt the promise. “No one’s ever going to hurt you again. Not as long as there’s breath in my body.”
She knew that was supposed to make her feel better, and it was quite the promise from quite the man, but her first husband had made her that same promise, and she’d watched him struck down as if he was nothing, and then she’d been left alone without protection. But all she said to Cole was “Thank you.”
He shook his head. “That was supposed to make you feel safe.”
She said, “I know.”
His fingers traced the scars on her cheek. “But you know how easily promises can be wiped out.”
She nodded.
“How about if I teach you how to protect yourself?”
She looked up, her heart skipping a beat. She’d asked Clark to teach her, and he’d told her that he would show her later, but later never came. When that failed, she’d tried to teach herself to shoot a gun, but she never quite got the hang of it. And when she’d asked for Clark’s help again, he’d put her off and never seemed to have time—there was always so much to do. “I’d like that.”
“Then we’ll start tonight.”
“Tonight?”
“No time like the present.”
“Yes.”
Because he didn’t believe a future was necessarily always going to be there, like her. It should have made her nervous, but for some reason it made her feel secure.
Wendy started splashing into the water.
“You sure she can swim?”
Miranda nodded. “She took to paddling so fast I think she’s part fish.”
“Can you?”
She nodded. He cocked an eyebrow at her. “Like a fish?”
And she chuckled, “Yes.”
“Good.” His thumb stroked over her lips, the rough surface catching erotically on the damp flesh.
“It’s going to be all right, Miranda.”
For the first time, when somebody told her that, she actually believed it. It was probably the sweetest gift he could ever give her. She stepped into his arms, sliding her hands up over his chest, ignoring his start of surprise at her making this move.
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