by Autumn Avery
“You know. You and your boys are about one sandwich short of a picnic I’ll tell you what.”
Nicky doesn’t even bother standing up. This is how I know how pissed off he is. He’s seething with anger and the only overt sign is his right leg quickly bouncing up and down.
“You know, any other time this sort of thing happens, I just kill everyone. I find the blokes responsible and I kill ‘em. String ‘em up, gut ‘em, feed them to the pigs, hunt down their families and kill them to to make an example. Take ‘em for everything they have. But you know what, Ty? You ain’t worth peanuts. You haven’t got shit. I can’t even rob you. You’re worth shit!”
Finally, Nicky snaps and stands up, clenching his fists at his sides. His face twists with anger that might be humorous if not for the situation.
“You aren’t worth shit!” he shouts again, in a voice so uncharacteristically loud that even his goons jump in their seats. Barry looks like he’s ready to piss himself, or just did. “So here’s what we’re gonna do, Ty.”
Nicky slowly paces towards me, rubbing his hands together. I’ve never seen him so out of composure before. He’s even sweating. My fight or flight reflex is on full alert, and it’s taking everything I have in me not to lash out and blast him in the face with a right hook. Don would blast me six times before I made my next move. And Barry would die next.
“You are going to throw a fucking fight for me, and if you don’t throw that fucking fight for me, I’m going to head over to that hospital, look up that dear mum of yours, let the boys here take turns on her, have a go myself, slit her open like a fish and watch her slowly die. Do you understand me, you son of a bitch!”
My blood pressure must be sky high, and my heart feels like a thousand volts of electricity are racing through it. I feel like I’ve just run a mile sprint. Everything in me wants to grab Nicky by the neck and choke the life out of him.
But what the hell am I going to do? He’s got me over a barrel here.
“My hand,” I say, raising the bandage so he can see.
“What a-fucking-bout it? You’re throwing the fight, you stupid piece of shit. Get up there and throw it!”
Nicky takes a final step forward, getting right into my face. I can smell the sausage on his breath and the hint of a day old cologne. But I keep my eyes locked on his. All I’m picturing is the revenge I will have on him when this is all over. I don’t know how yet, but it will come, and Nicky will sorely regret ever knocking on the door to my shop.
“All right, Nicky. You got it,” I say through my teeth. We stare at each other. I know we’re both thinking the same thing: I want to kill this son of a bitch.
“Good boy,” Nicky says, slapping me “affectionately” on the cheek. “Untie him,” he shouts to his boys before walking past me out the door.
19
Jenny
Where did Ty just run off to? I think. I can feel myself getting mad, and my protective instinct kicking in that wants to get mad and assume the worst, but I calm down by reminding myself of all the great things Ty has done for me since I met him, and how every time I have jumped to an assumption with him I’ve ended up being wrong.
Something must have come up, I tell myself. He’ll be back.
My phone rings. It’s Kristen. I answer.
“Hey, babe. How are you?”
“Jenny,” she says, her voice quivering. “Can I … can I get a ride?”
“Kristen, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“I’m at the Motel on route four. Could I get a ride?”
“Yeah, of course. Is everything okay?”
I already know it’s not. Must be something to do with those guys from the other night. This is another reason I steer clear of arrangements like that. Even if I was able to have sex for money, which I’m not, it’s just so dangerous to go off by yourself with men you don’t even know.
“Uhm, yeah. I just … I just need a ride.”
“Okay. I’ll be right there,” I assure her.
“Thanks,” she says, sounding a bit relieved. I swing a U-turn and speed back downtown towards route four. It’s a small highway and the speed limit is only fifty-five, but I’m going eighty, my foot heavy on the gas. Route four leads out into the sticks, and the motels down this way are pretty shady and worn down. There’s only two reasons anyone rents a room out here: sex or drugs—or both.
What should have been a fifteen-minute drive took me just under eight minutes. I pull out my cell as I turn into the parking lot. Kristen answers on the first ring.
“What room?” I ask her.
“One fifteen.”
“Kay, I’m parking now.” I hang up and find a spot two doors down from her room. This place is a dump. The pavement is cracked and broken. The place doesn’t look like it’s had a paint job since the day it opened, and half the room numbers have broken off. Kristen is opening the door as I walk up.
“Hey! Are you okay?” I ask her, wrapping my arms around her and hugging her tightly. I can tell she’s been crying. “They didn’t hurt you did they!? Did they hurt you? Rob you? I’ll kill them!”
“No, no, no,” she says, sniffling and wiping at her eyes.
“Oh, thank God. I’d break some faces!”
Kristen manages to laugh quietly as I step into the dingy motel room. Someone obviously had a “good time” here. It smells like bodies and booze. The air is thick and sticky. The sheets are all twisted up on the bed. Bottles of alcohol are strewn about and what looks like the remnants of some lines of coke are scattered about on the bathroom sink. I can see the shame in Kristen’s eyes.
“So they’re gone?” I ask her.
“They’re gone,” she replies, shaking her head. “Not like I’d want them here anyway. They were so disgusting, Jenny. I can’t even tell you. I should have listened to you. I feel like … I just feel so dirty. I couldn’t resist the money, Jenny. I couldn’t …”
She’s embarrassed. I can tell. This is a total “I told you so” moment for me, but that would be wrong. Hopefully this is enough of a wake up call for her, and if not, I’ll have a talk with her later. But not now.
“Come on, get your stuff and let’s get you out of here,” I tell her.
“I’m ready,” she says, shouldering her purse.
“Okay, come on.” I tell her, taking her by her hand and leading her out of the disaster room. Even though this place still smells slightly of trash, it’s better than the air in there. At least there’s a breeze outside.
“You got your car,” she observes.
“Yeah, Ty helped me get it.”
“Who’s Ty?” she asks, and I realize just how out of the loop she is with what’s been happening with my life. I bite my lip as we both get into my car.
“Yeah, uhm,” I start, not sure how to begin. “He’s a guy I met at the club the other night.”
“What!?” she bursts out, turning to me with a look of disbelief. “You’re seeing a guy from the club!?”
“Yes, but he’s different, Kristen!”
“Oh, God,” she gasps, slapping both hands against her forehead. “You sound like me.”
“I swear, Kristen. He—he’s just different. I thought he was an asshole, but—”
“Jenny! We have rules!”
“I know we do, but listen! Okay, he came over to my apartment, and—”
“He what!?” Suddenly the tables have turned and Kristen is questioning me.
“Well, I needed a ride home … and it’s a long story, but the dogs actually liked him! They didn’t bark or growl or bite. They licked his hands! It was unbelievable.”
“That is strange …” she muses. “But still. A guy from the club?”
“I know. I know,” I say. “But seriously. If I told you what’s been going on you wouldn’t even believe me. You might actually meet him.”
“What, you’re going to introduce me!?” she gasps.
“He might … he might be at my apartment when we get back.”
The
re’s nothing but stunned silence from beside me. I take my eyes off the road and look over to see Kristen just staring at me, eyes wide, mouth agape, like I just told her I have discovered the worlds first real live alien and it’s living in my basement.
There’s not a whole lot more to be said as we drive home. Kristen just needs to be around friends right now, and I don’t want to inquire any more details about last night. She had a bad time, and that’s really all I need to know. Just as long as she wasn’t hurt, what she needs now is to be away from it all and around people who care about her. And that’s me.
Ty’s truck is in the driveway when we get back to my apartment.
“Is that—” Kristen starts to ask.
“Yes.” I say.
She gives me a look that’s half excited half inquisitive as we get out of the car. I open the door to a sloppy greeting from Bruno and Chester. They haven’t seen Kristen in a long time and practically knock her over as they greet her.
“Hey, guys!” Kristen says effusively, patting them both on the head as they lap at her with their long tongues. “Long time no see! Yessss—”
Kristen’s voice cuts off when she looks up to see Ty standing in the middle of the room. My legs go weak as I see he’s shirtless. In fact, he’s wearing nothing but a towel and is clearly on his way to the bathroom to take a shower.
“Hey,” he grins at Kristen.
“Hi …”
Long silence …
“I’m Ty,” he finally says. I can’t help but smile.
“K-Kristen,” she mutters quietly. Ty chuckles.
“Nice to meet you. I’m gonna shower real quick, Jen.”
“Okay.”
Ty walks to the bathroom and I can just see Kristen’s mind working as she looks over his toned body. Kristen is a very visual person and checks guys out as much, if not more, than they check us out. The bathroom door shuts and as soon as she hears the water turn on she turns to me in disbelief.
“Okay, wow,” she exclaims. “Now I see why you broke the rules.”
I laugh, sitting down on the couch. “It’s not just that, Kristen.”
“Did you see those abs?!” she says, sitting down and getting right in my face.
“Uh, I’ve seen a lot more than that.”
“What?!” she practically shouts. “You fucked him? You fucked him!”
A guilty look comes over my face and I can’t help but smile. We both know how big this news is for me. It’s been so long since I’ve been with anyone, and having basically sworn off men after my ex, it must seem like the return of Christ or something to Kristen.
“How’s his …” Kristen holds up a pinky finger.
“Yeah, it’s more like—” I reply, holding up my forearm and slapping it with my other hand.
“You’re joking …”
“Nope,” I laugh. “Still a little bit sore actually.”
“Stop it,” she says, slapping me gently on the arm. “Why do you luck out!?”
“I think it’s Karma,” I say. “After all the shit I had to put up with in the past the universe finally decided to send me a good guy.”
“So you two are like—together?”
“I don’t know,” I say slowly, realizing I haven’t actually thought about this myself. What are Ty and I doing? It’s all happened so fast. I was opposed to even getting close to him before. And then things changed.… “We haven’t really had that talk yet.”
“So it’s just a sex thing,” she says flatly.
“No,” I correct her. “It’s not that. We just … we haven’t had the talk yet.”
“So what are you going to do?” she asks me.
“I’m not sure,” I say, running things over in my mind. “I mean … he is great. I thought he was this cocky asshole, but he saved my ass from these assholes outside the club the other night. And he watched the kids for me so I could work—”
“What!?”
“And he helped me get my car back from Greg’s who was trying to scam me. I mean—he’s really great.”
“So when’s the wedding!” she cackles. I can’t help but smile.
“We’ll see,” I say slowly. “I just—I have to make sure I am smart about this. I don’t want to bring another man into my life and have it not work out. It’s just not me I have to think about. I have Ella and Josh too.”
“Yeah,” Kristen says, leaning back. “Well, he’s showering in your apartment. I think you’re going to have to make a decision pretty soon.”
20
Ty
I’m trying not to laugh too loudly when I picture Kristen’s face when she walked in. She obviously thinks I’m hot. If this was any other girl besides Jenny, I’d be contemplating the odds of getting them both into bed for a threesome. But for some reason, those thoughts don’t come into my head with her. As a stripper, I’m sure she gets proposals like that all the time, and I don’t want to be just another douche bag. But I think the real reason, is that I actually give a shit about her.
And that’s one of the reasons I have to sort things out with Nicky. I can’t involve her in this any more than she already is. I mean, it’s a miracle he hasn’t sent his goons to follow me here by now, or it would have been her taped to that chair instead of Barry, and for that I would never forgive myself.
I’ve been going over options in my head, but I can’t see any way out of this one. Nicky’s holding all the cards and I don’t know if I have a play. I’m going to have to take a dive for him. It’s really not that big of a deal in the scheme of things, but getting pushed around like this is not my style. He’s never seen war like I’ve seen. He and his goons have never seen real trouble like I’ve been in. And yet here they are, acting like tough guys because they live in a society that lets them.
Letting the water run off my head, I look down at my hand. I’ve taken the bandage off so I don’t get it wet. It’s slowly healing, but it’s still in rough shape, and spots of blood run off my finger tips to splash down on the white floor of the tub.
I’m picturing a life with Jenny, something I’ve never allowed myself to do. I’ve never felt so at home anywhere since my old house and my old life with Christine. I swore I’d never let myself feel anything like this again, but Jenny came into my life and there was nothing I could do about it. From the moment I gave her that ride home from the club I was stuck to her.
Something needs to be done about this Nicky situation. Even if I throw this fight for him, that will never be the end of it. Not after what’s happened. It’ll be another fight, and then another and I’ll be his dog forever. And Jenny and Josh and Ella would be his leverage. He wouldn’t even need to threaten my mom. The more people I bring into my life the more leverage he’ll have. I can’t lie down and take it.
There is one thing I could do.…
But that would be a big move.
I shut the water off and dry off, wrapping a towel around my waist. When I step out of the bathroom both the girls are sitting on the couch. Kristen tries not to be obvious while checking me out, but turns away when I smile at her.
“I’m gonna get some fresh air,” she says, getting up and heading outside. I head to Jenny’s room to change while Kristen makes herself scarce. When I get back to the living room Jenny’s sitting alone on the couch.
“Can you redo this for me?” I ask her, showing her my wounded hand.
“Of course,” she says softly. I move over to her and sit down beside her, laying my hand on my knee. She takes it gently and begins wrapping the gauze around it.
She’s so beautiful, I think, staring at her eyes as she re-dresses my bandage.
“Your friend all right?” I ask her, breaking the silence.
“Yeah, she’ll be fine,” she says, obviously not wanting to go into it. I simply nod and continue watching her. I can’t stop thinking about her lips and how I feel when I kiss them. Her body drives me wild. She secures the ace bandage and looks up at me with those beautiful eyes.
“Ty?” sh
e asks gently. “What’s going on with you?”
I guess that time has come. I can’t hide my life from her any longer. She has a right to know about me before things go any further.
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Jenny,” I warn her.
“I want to know.”
With a deep breath, I do what I’d sworn to never do again—open myself up to someone. I’m being strong armed by some pretty dangerous guys to throw a fight for them.”
I watch for her reaction as this sinks in, but it’s hard to read. I can’t tell if she doesn’t believe me or if she’s simply accepting it. So I continue.
“I’m a Veteran. I was in Afghanistan. I had a wife. I had a daughter. They died. I swore I’d never let anyone close to me again.”
“That was your old house?” she asks softly. “The one we drove by that night?”
“Yes,” I whisper. She’s perceptive. I’m not surprised.
“Where did you get this?” she asks, gesturing to my hand.
“That was stupid,” I tell her with a deep sigh. “My friends convinced me to rob a pawn shop with them.”
“What!?” she almost shouts, sounding legitimately surprised.
“I couldn’t say no. They’ve saved my ass so many times. I owed them.”
“And things didn’t go well?”
“Moore died,” I say, feeling the twinge in my chest from the pain of saying the words. “We barely got out of there. And what’s worse, it turns out the place is owned by the same guy shaking me down for the fight.”
I can see Jenny’s mind working. She looks away from me.
What is she thinking!?
I want to scream this at her, but I have to let her process. If there’s any hope of her accepting me for who I am, I have to let her do it on her time. This is a lot to drop on her, and I would understand if she tells me to go. I’m almost expecting it. Part of me is actually hoping she says it, because that would mean there would never be a chance of me hurting her or getting her hurt. After what feels like a year, she turns back to me.