Against All Odds - Angel's Story: Against All Odds (Destiny Series Book 4)

by Perry, J L

  “She will. She’ll never forget, but she will learn to live with what happened.”

  “How can you be sure?” I ask.

  “Because I lost a baby once, too.”

  “You did?”

  “Yes. I was pregnant the night I found out Jake and your mother were having an affair. I actually lost the baby the same night.”

  “Shit,” I say hanging my head in shame. I hate what my parents did to her. “I’m sorry.”

  “You have nothing to be sorry for, sweetie. You weren’t even born then. I didn’t know it at the time, but your mother and I were both pregnant. My baby would’ve been your half-brother or sister. I may never have got the chance to meet or love it the way I wanted, but I’m grateful I got the chance to meet and love you.”

  Her words cut straight to my heart. When I look up, she has tears in her eyes just like I do. She wraps me in her arms again, holding me tight.

  “I’m thankful I got to meet you, too.” My voice cracks. “From the moment I met you, I kind of wished I had a mother like you.”

  “Well if things had worked out differently, if I’d stayed with your father, I would’ve been you stepmother.”

  “I would’ve loved to have someone like you in my life when I was growing up. My life would’ve been so different.”

  “Were things that bad for you growing up?” she asks.

  “They were until Pops came into my life.”

  “I wish I could’ve been there for you,” she says reaching for my hand again.

  “If you stayed with Jake, you would never have had Angel. She more than makes up for everything I went through. She’s my light at the end of the tunnel.”

  “I may not have got the chance to be your stepmother, but if you two get your shit together, one day I may be your mother-in-law,” she says bumping her shoulder against mine. We both let out a humourless chuckle. I’d like nothing more than to claim sweet-cheeks for eternity.

  “I’m a firm believer things happen for a reason. That night I lost the baby was the same night I met Logan. Although I hate what happened, if it didn’t, I wouldn’t have known what true love feels like. I wouldn’t have known what it feels like to be truly happy.”

  “I’m glad you found your happy ending,” I tell her.

  “With everything I know now, I also believe I was never meant to have that baby. I think it was all part of God’s plan. You were brought into this world for my little girl, Chase. You two were made for each other. Just like Logan was made for me.”

  “You really believe that?” I ask surprised.

  “I do.” Even though my head is spinning with everything Brooke has said, I’m also blown away by it. For the first time in weeks, I truly have a glimmer of hope that maybe things will work out for us in the end.

  The subject moves to my birth father, Jake. Brooke tells me how they met, how he used to be before his life spiralled out of control. It’s nice to hear some positive things about him. Her stories have me wishing that I got a chance to meet the old him. The Jake before the drugs took hold.

  “I have some things I want to show you,” she says digging through her bag. “I hope you don’t mind, but before coming here, I went to see your grandparents.”

  “I have grandparents?” I ask in amazement.

  “Yes. You also have an aunt and three cousins who are dying to meet you. I was hoping if I could convince you to come to Sydney with me, after you’ve seen Angel, we could go and visit with them, together. They had no idea you even existed, but were over the moon when they found out. They’re good people, Chase. I’m positive you’ll love them, just as much as I know they’ll love you.”

  “Wow,” is all I manage to get out. I have blood relatives who actually want me in their lives. I’m speechless.

  “I have something to show you,” she says. My eyes move down to the envelope in her hands. “Your grandparents gave me some photos they wanted you to have. They’re of your father.”

  A lump rises to my throat when she passes me the first photo. As long as I can remember, I’ve wondered what my father looked like. Now I know.

  “You look very much alike, don’t you think? You definitely have his eyes, his nose, and his mouth. That first morning I met you, when you answered the door at Angel’s house, to be honest I got a shock. I don’t know if you realised it or not, I tried my best to act unaffected, but for a moment I felt like I was looking at Jake. When you introduced yourself as Chase Daniels, I dismissed it, thinking maybe it was just a coincidence.”

  “I do remember, but I thought it was because a half-naked guy was answering your daughter’s door,” I chuckle. She laughs too.

  She passes me the photos one by one. There’s even a photo of Brooke and Jake on their wedding day. She looks just like my sweet-cheeks. It’s uncanny. I do see a lot of myself in Jake as well.

  “I can see the resemblance,” I tell her. “He’s rather handsome.” She giggles and nudges me with her shoulder when I say that, which makes me laugh. Jesus it feels good to laugh again.

  “Thank you for coming here today, Brooke, and for all this,” I say holding up the pictures in my hands.

  “It was my pleasure, sweetie. I hope it’s helped.”

  “It has. More than you’ll ever know.”

  “Well, I’ll leave you alone to think about what I’ve said. I have a plane ticket with your name on it if you decide you want to fly back to Sydney with me. No pressure. I’ll totally understand if you don’t, but the flight leaves in just under three hours.”

  “I don’t need time to think about it. She’s been on my mind every minute of every day. I’m dying to see her.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

  Angel

  I’m laying on my bed, drowning in my own sorrow, when there’s a knock on my bedroom door. “Can I come in?” my brother asks.

  “Sure,” I answer reluctantly, sitting up. I don’t feel up to seeing him, or anyone for that matter. I need to snap out of my funk. Shutting myself away from my family isn’t making me feel any better. It’s making me feel worse.

  I miss them and I know they’re worried about me. I’m even worried about me, but I’m struggling to hold my head above water. I feel like I’m drowning and I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever get past this.

  “How you holding up?” he asks coming to sit next to me on my bed. I shrug.

  “Not too good.” It’s short and to the point, and the best I can give him right now. He reaches over and grabs hold of my hand.

  “Is there anything I can do to help? I hate seeing you like this. I want my old sister back.” The sincerity in his voice brings a lump to my throat. I want the old me back too.

  I shake my head. Words won’t come. I know if I talk, I’ll start to cry. CJ and I have always been close. I don’t want to burden him with my problems.

  “Chase called me the other day,” he says. My head turns in his direction.

  “He did?” Just the mention of his name has my heart racing. Not a day has passed that I haven’t thought of him. Wondered how he was. What he was up to. I know if I answered his calls, or read his text messages, I’d know, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to do that.

  “He loves you, sis. He was desperate to see how you were doing since you won’t take his calls. He wanted me to tell you that he’s here for you if you ever want to talk. He misses you.”

  When his words sink in, the dam bursts. The tears I’ve been holding in break free. CJ wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his chest. “I love him too,” I cry, “but so much has happened. I don’t think we can ever get back what we once had.”

  “How do you know if you won’t even try? At the very least, talk to him. Sure he fucked up, you both did, but is it really worth throwing everything away over a few silly mistakes? Look what being apart from him is doing to you, to both of you.”

  He’s right. Being apart from Chase has been unbearable. I’m not sure if I can take that step though. The longer I’ve gone wi
thout speaking to him, the harder it seems to make that move.

  “Thanks for letting me know. I love you, CJ. I’m sorry I’ve been such a shitty sister lately.”

  “I love you, too. You’re not a shitty sister. You’re just…lost. You’ve been going through a lot. I understand. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss the old you, but I know you’ll find your way back to us soon. Make the move okay. Call him.”

  When my brother leaves, his words play in my mind. I need to try harder to get out of this funk I’m in. Moping around in my room, shutting myself away from the people who love me, who care, isn’t helping.

  Reaching over to my bedside table, I do something I’ve wanted to do for the past few weeks. I retrieve the letter that Chase gave me at the hospital, and open it.

  Angel,

  You know I’m not a man of many words, but there’s so much I want to say to you right now. I thought a letter would be the best way to go.

  First and foremost, I need to apologise for the way I acted when you told me you were pregnant. My actions were inexcusable.

  At first I freaked, I know that. All I could think about was how fucked up my biological parents were. That’s the only reason I never wanted to have a child of my own. I love you sweet-cheeks, so fucking much. If there was one person on this earth I’d like to share something like that with, please believe me it would be you. It will only ever be you.

  I’ll admit, even as I drove to your house after you left, in my heart I wasn’t sure how I felt about becoming a dad. What I did realise though, was that the life growing inside of you was a part of us and everything we’ve shared. I knew that couldn’t be a bad thing.

  The uncertainty I felt stopped the second I realised you were both in danger. It’s true what they say, you don’t know what you have until it’s gone. My first instinct was to protect you both. I’m sorry I let you down. I’m sorry I never got to you both in time.

  When I saw the blood, I can’t even describe the devastation I felt. After the surgery, when the doctor said the baby hadn’t survived, honestly, I was crushed. My heart was shattered; for our child, for you and for us. I’d give anything to be able to redo that night. Fucking anything.

  I’ll never forgive myself for what happened. Never. I let you down. I let our child down. Words will never be enough to make up for what I did, but I’m sorry, sweet-cheeks. So fucking sorry.

  Like you, I’m not sure I’ll ever get over what happened. It’s only now that I realise how much losing a child hurts. I can only imagine how you feel. As hard as that is, if I was to lose you over what happened, it would kill me.

  You’re my soulmate, sweet-cheeks. I think deep down, from the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew that. I never thought I could love anyone the way I love you. You‘ve given me so much. Not only have you made me a better man, you have given my life meaning. I don’t want to lose what we have.

  I’m not asking for your forgiveness; I don’t deserve that, but, what I’m asking, no begging, is that you don’t let what’s happened, end us. I couldn’t bear that. I need you in my life. I’m nothing without you by my side.

  Love Chase.

  I lay on my bed and sob. I hate myself for taking so long to read his letter. I hate myself for walking away from him that day in Melbourne, when he begged me not to. I hate myself for not having the guts to answer his calls.

  I need to call him. It may be too late for us, but I still need to do it. It’s been over a month since we’ve spoken. It’s not like I can just pick up the phone and call him and say, “Hey, how are you?” I need to think about it. I need to know what I’m going to say to him first.

  It’s late afternoon and I’m still in my pyjamas. Wiping my eyes, I stand from my bed, heading towards my bathroom. Once I brush my teeth and run a comb through my hair, I change into my running gear.

  It’s something I haven’t done since coming back home. Maybe it’s just what I need to clear my head. Maybe it can help me think of the right words to say. I just want the hurting to stop. I want the old me back, too. Chase is the only one who can help me do that.

  ••••

  As I make my way back towards my parents’ home, I notice someone sitting on the sand, further down the beach. It’s unusual to see anyone this time of day. I usually have the beach to myself. As I get closer, my heart starts to beat out of my chest. It couldn’t be, could it?

  He’s leaning back on his arms, his legs outstretched in front of him, crossed at the ankles. From here he looks like he’s focusing out onto the horizon. As I get closer, his head snaps in my direction. It’s almost like he senses me near. I stop in my tracks. My heart starts to race, as all the air leaves my body.

  He’s come looking for me. I stand motionless, holding his stare. Why is he here? Does he still want me? Is it even possible to make things work between us after everything that’s happened? Can he forgive me for running away?

  I can’t answer any of those questions. I guess I need to find out why he’s here first. What he has to say.

  I take a step closer. He stands, brushing the sand off his jeans. Then he takes a step closer to me. Neither of us make another move. We continue to stand, frozen, our eyes locked on each other. He looks tired. Broken. I feel the tears burn my eyes. I want to go to him so bad, but I’m rooted to the spot. I’ve been aching to see him, touch him.

  I’ve missed him so much. A small smile graces his handsome face. It makes me smile also. When he opens his arms to me, I don’t hesitate, quickly closing the distance between us. I jump into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist.

  I’m all sweaty and gross from my run, but I don’t care. He wraps his arms tightly around my waist, swinging me around. We both laugh. I’m sure it’s something neither of us has done in a while. Well I know I haven’t anyway.

  Once he places me back down on my feet, he cups my face in his hands. “Hi,” he breathes as his eyes scan my face.

  “Hi.” Before I get a chance to say another word, his mouth is on mine. His kiss is desperate, like a starved man. I’ve dreamt about being with him again. I never thought it would happen.

  We have so much to talk about. So much has happened. I hope we can work past it. Right now I don’t want to think about it. I just want to savour in the fact that he’s here. That I’m in his arms again.

  When he finally pulls out of the kiss, he rests his forehead against mine. We’re both panting, trying to catch our breath. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I’m so sorry for everything that has happened.”

  “Me too,” I reply as tears rise to my eyes.

  “Oh, sweet-cheeks,” he says. He pulls my head into his chest while he strokes my hair. “I wish more than anything I could go back and redo that night. I’ll never forgive myself for the way I treated you, and what happened afterwards.”

  “It’s not your fault,” I whisper. “You weren’t to know Riley was waiting for me when I got home. I’m sorry for everything too. I’m sorry for walking away from us.”

  “I promised you after the first time, I’d never let him get near you again. I let you down.”

  “Shhh,” I say as I pull back and place my finger on his lips. “It’s not your fault, okay.”

  He plants a soft kiss on my fingertip. “I love you,” he says as he cups my face in his hands. “I’ve never stopped. I’ll always love you, Angel. I can’t seem to function properly without you by my side. I need you in my life, so fucking much.” He exhales as he holds me tight.

  “I need you too,” is all I say, because it’s the truth. Despite my darkness, I’ve been pining for him.

  After he releases me from his crushing hug, he sits back down on the sand, pulling me onto his lap. “I’ve missed you so much, sweet-cheeks,” he whispers as he buries his face in the crook of my neck, planting a tiny kiss there.

  “I’ve missed you too,” I say as I wrap my arms around his waist. “So much.” We don’t say anything for a while.

  “How are you?” he asks, breakin
g our silence.

  I shrug. “I’ve been better. Things are looking up for me today though,” I say with a smile.

  “I’ve been miserable without you,” he says. “I’m—”

  “Shhh,” I say, cutting him off. “Let’s talk about this later. I just want to enjoy the fact you’re here. There’ll be plenty of time to talk about all the other stuff later. I honestly thought I’d never see you again.”

  “I couldn’t stay away,” he says as his lips meet mine. “I want you in my life forever. I’m a miserable fuck without you. That’s what Pops says anyway,” he chuckles. I miss Pops. Hearing his name makes me smile.

  “How is Pops?”

  “He’s good. He misses you.”

  “I miss him as well.”

  “I wanted to come sooner. I wasn’t sure if you’d want to see me since you wouldn’t take any of my calls.”

  “I’m sorry. What made you change your mind?”

  “I got a visit from your mum.”

  “My mum came to see you?” I ask shocked.

  “Yes. She was worried about you. She told me how down you’ve been. She asked if I could come and see you. I didn’t hesitate. I fucking needed to see you.”

  “I haven’t been in a good place since…you know…the baby, but I’ve been lost without you too.”

  I continue to sit on his lap as we talk. We don’t get into anything too deep. Just light conversation for now.

  Reaching forward, I remove my runners and my socks. “What’s that?” he asks looking down at my ankle. “You got a tattoo?”

  “Yes. CJ and I stopped in at this little town on our drive back to Sydney. I’m not sure why, but I felt compelled to get it.” I know exactly why I got it, but I don’t want to get into it right now. I got a chain of white daisies around my ankle. Symbolic of the gravesite I left behind when I came home.