When had he fallen in love with her? Had it been the day he'd put his feet back on the ranch after being away for seven years? Or had it been much sooner like the night Dani was conceived?
Lexie's hair was down today instead of in the usual braid. The wind played with the black strands teasing her neck and cheeks that were flushed with cold.
She wore sunglasses and Mitch wished he could see her eyes then he would know if she still cared about him at all.
Lexie stared at him for a moment then turned her nose toward the house and continued walking. Damn it, she was going to ignore him all together. Angry, he took a couple of steps toward her when she stopped suddenly at the base of the porch steps. Without looking at him she turned her head to the side. "What do you want, Mitch?" she asked over her shoulder.
Her tone was as cold as the wind whipping around them. She was still hurting and he was terrified she wasn't going to give him a chance to explain--much less forgive him. "I want to talk to you--no I need to talk to you," he said firmly.
"Too bad 'cause I don't feel like talking," she said and marched up the stairs toward the front door.
Panic gripped him. "Please, Lexie. Will you at least give me a few minutes to explain a few things before you toss me out on my ear?"
His words stopped her. Lexie spared him a glance then gave one tiny shrug of her shoulder signaling him to come inside and walked up the remaining steps.
When she went through the door she left it standing open and headed straight down the hall without even checking to see if he followed her. Mitch stepped over the threshold and closed the door. He heaved a deep breath at conquering the first hurdle--getting inside the house.
As he walked down the hallway to the kitchen he remembered the first time they'd walked this hall together just a few short weeks ago. He'd been confused and a little nervous with an edge of anger glossing over all of his emotions. Today, his feelings were totally different. He was just plain scared.
Toby trotted into the kitchen ahead of him and made a beeline for his water dish where he lapped at the water.
Without saying a word, Lexie yanked off her jacket and draped it over a chair before going to one of the kitchen cabinets. "I'm making tea. Want a cup?" she offered in a stiff voice. She didn't even ask him if he wanted to sit down.
"Yeah, thanks," he said quietly. "Mind if I have a seat?"
"Suit yourself," she answered in an excruciatingly polite tone. He balled one hand into a tight fist then willed himself to relax. Getting mad wouldn't get him Lexie. He listened to the quiet noises she made as she prepared the tea. When he couldn't stand the silence any longer he said, "Where was Skinny off to?"
She set the kettle on a burner to boil, turned and leaned against the counter. "He's gone for good."
He wasn't surprised. Skinny had always resented working for a woman. Good riddance as far as Mitch was concerned. He raised a brow and looked at her. "I thought so. What happened?"
Lexie shrugged and gripped the edge of the counter until her knuckles turned white he noticed. "You know--too much water under the bridge and that sort of thing. I won't need a foreman anyway since the majority of the land isn't mine anymore.” She speared him with an angry gaze. "Thanks to you."
She wasn't going to make it easy for him. "Are you planning to stay mad at me forever?"
"I can manage 50 acres just fine by myself," she stated ignoring his statement. "What did you need to talk to me about?"
He strolled to the bank of windows in the kitchen and looked out over the ranch. He felt her gaze boring into his back like the sharp point of a knife. Mitch turned and looked at her straight on. Her blue eyes were clear and beautiful but full of resentment and gleaming with sadness.
He wanted to go to her and smooth the tension from her shoulders, to make happiness bloom again in her eyes, but he knew she wouldn't let him touch her. "I know you feel that I betrayed you, Lexie and I'm sorry. You have to believe me."
Angry tears glimmered in her eyes. She licked her lips and swallowed. "You're sorry. Why? You got everything you wanted," she said in an icy, exacting tone.
He shook his head. "No...I didn't get everything. I didn't get you...or Dani.” The resentment in her face and eyes faded and the grim line of her mouth softened. He took it as a sign and took one step forward. "The bank planned to take every last acre, all of the ranch's equipment plus the house."
"I know all that," she said in a controlled voice.
"Let me finish," he said fighting for calm, fighting for her. Her shoulders relaxed and she blinked her eyes a couple of times against the tears that pooled in their depths. Mitch took another step toward her. When she didn't back away, the panic inside him began to ease. "I didn't want you to have to sacrifice all of the land and the house. I know how much this place means to you and Dani. There's more to the deal I made than just the land. If you'll let me, I'll explain it to you."
When she nodded, he exhaled a deep breath and continued. "The last thing I even wanted to do was hurt you, Lex. Usually when the Foundation makes a deal they arrange to purchase the land only. It took some fast negotiating but there's more to the deal than just 50 acres and the house.” A spark of hope glimmered in her eyes. "They plan to use horses as part of their treatment plan and they would like you to supervise their riding clinics."
With a ragged gasp, she pressed a hand over her mouth and turned abruptly toward the stove. The shrill whistle of the tea kettle filled the kitchen. She turned off the burner then gripped the edge of the counter and lowered her head. "Riding clinics," she said in a choked voice. "You included me, not just the land, but me in your deal. That will mean a steady income for me and Dani. Along with training horses and working directly for the hospital, we'll be okay financially.” Her voice came out in a broken whisper. She turned, lifted her head and gazed at him. "Why Mitch? Why did you do that for us?"
He walked slowly toward her. When he reached her side, Mitch lifted his hands and cupped her face. He lowered his head and stroked his mouth over hers, gently, softly until he heard her breath sigh from between her lips.
He lifted his head and gazed into her eyes. He saw love there. Bright, shining love, a love he hoped would burn forever. Joy rose inside him like a warm, Chinook wind until ever cell in his body felt warm and renewed. "Don't you know?” She shook her head and kept her eyes firmly fixed on his. "You're not the only one who lost something, Lex. I lost my heart and I wasn't ever sure I wanted to give it to anyone...until you, sweetheart.” He smiled and shook his head. "I don't know how it happened. One day my life was on cruise control and the next I'd derailed. You and Dani--own my heart."
Tears ran down her cheeks in tiny, crystal streams. He wiped them away with the pads of his fingers. "I love you, Lexie. I love you with all my heart and soul.” A smile trembled over her lips at his words. "I want to make a family with you and Dani. I want us to have more children. I can't live my life without you and Dani in it."
"Are you sure, Mitch? Are you absolutely sure that's what you want?" she asked in a soft voice. "What about your job? What about the foundation and your jet-setting life?"
He smiled and drew her to him in a fierce hug then pulled back and grasped her shoulders. "The only life I want is right here with you and Dani. I'm changing careers."
"What?" she said with a shake of her head.
He kissed her solidly on the mouth then drew back and smiled. "When we were building the new barn I rediscovered how much I enjoy working with my hands. It felt good to use a hammer again and to smell freshly cut wood. I've had a hankering to design some furniture. What do you think?"
"What about all the money you made? It will take some time to build a new business."
Mitch smoothed some hair back from her face. "It isn't always about the money, Lex. I took that job because of what happened to Parker. I wanted to make up in some small way for what happened to him. I couldn't do anything that day to prevent the accident, to stop him from dying, but by working for th
e foundation I knew I could help injured people in the future.” He drew her into his arms again and reveled in the feel of her warm, soft body next to his. "Then I discovered I had a daughter and everything changed," he murmured next to her ear.
She drew out of his arms and rested a soft, loving hand on his face. "Guess I'd better tell you my news. Tommy Flowers came by a couple of days ago. It seems that Mason Flowers isn't my father after all."
His head spun. "What?"
"Shocking isn't it? Tommy and my mother had an affair during her marriage to Mason. Tommy Flowers is my real father."
He couldn't believe it. Her declaration gave him a jolt all the way to his toes. But she seemed okay with it. Her voice sounded clear, not hurt or even angry. "How do you feel about that?"
She cocked her head to one side and pursed her lips. "At first I was shocked, hurt and angry that I didn't know.” She looked away. "It's like my entire life has been a lie," she stated quietly.
Mitch cupped his hands around her head again and drew her gaze back to his. "No, Lexie, no. Nothing about you is a lie, sweetheart. You're the most truthful thing in my life."
She blinked against a fresh batch of tears welling in her eyes. Lexie leaned forward and brushed her lips over his. "That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me."
Her words touched him deep in his soul. How could he have stayed away from this woman all those years? How could his heart not have seen that he needed her in his life?
"From the first moment I saw you after being away for so long I knew...I knew in my heart that you were the only one for me.” He pulled her back into his arms kissed the soft, warm skin below her ear. "It scared me; it scared me down to my soul. I didn't know how to act or what to think. I've always been in control, of my work, my life, my emotions. Until you.” He drew back so he could look into her eyes and see her reaction. "I made that deal so I could give you three things: the land, my love and a father for Dani...if you'll have me.
A cry of joy broke from her lips. She nodded her head in a jerky motion then smiled and touched his face. He laid his hand over hers. "I admit I was afraid, horrified in fact that I had a little girl. I wasn't sure if I could be a good father or what it meant to be a father. But Dani and you have shown me that it's what I want more than anything in this world. When you came by Dad's the other day and said you didn't want to see me again I felt like I died inside.” He paused fro a moment remembering the horrible fear and anger he'd felt over losing Lexie all over again. Only now, he knew deep in his heart that he hadn't lost her. She was in his life. This time, for good. "It terrified me like nothing I've ever experienced in my life.” He gazed into her eyes and kissed her lightly on the mouth. "I thought I'd lost you for good. I can't lose you, Lexie, I can't. Will you marry me?"
Laughing and crying at the same time, Lexie threw herself into his arms. "Yes, Yes, Mitch, I'll marry you," she exclaimed.
Mitch pulled her close and knew that no matter what happened along life's road ahead of them nothing would ever tear them apart.
# # #
Hand in hand, Lexie and Mitch climbed to the top of the small hilltop behind the house and faced her father's grave. The words on the headstone were shadowed by the dwindling afternoon light. Wind swept around the grave, brushed through the grass making a soft, rustling sound. Lexie read the lettering on the stone once more.
A light glimmered briefly at first inside her heart, like a flame sucking in oxygen trying to grow larger, brighter. She wrapped her arm around Mitch's waist and snuggled against his left side. She felt the press of his mouth as he kissed the top of her head. "Thank you for coming out here with me," she said softly.
"You don't have to thank me, baby. You're a part of me. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you. I hope you know that."
She smiled and laid her head on his shoulder. "I do now. I really do.” Gradually the light, deep within her heart grew brighter until it illuminated the deepest truth of all inside her. She was still Lexie Dare, although Tommy Flower's blood flowed through her veins. She knew who she was and how far she'd come. Mitch was right. Her life was not a lie.
She looked at the headstone. People always forgive those they love. Hadn't she said that to Tommy just a few days ago?
After a moment, she moved away from the warmth of Mitch's embrace and knelt down on the ground with her hands stuffed in the pockets of her coat.
“Dad,” she began, talking to the headstone and the wind. “I know the truth now and it's okay. I know why you couldn't love me.” She inhaled a deep breath of cold air and pushed the last of her hurt and anger at Mason Dare out of her mind and heart. “But the truth is you're the one who lost. You lost out on having a daughter in your life. I know how much you loved Parker. But I deserved your love too. Now, I have Tommy's love. I plan to give him mine right back and together we're going to cherish the rest of our lives.”
No more tears burned behind her eyes whenever she visited the grave site. But she stared at the headstone as if her father’s voice would echo from the granite, telling her he loved her. Oh God, she wished he could have forgiven her for so many things. “Good bye, Dad.”
Something lightened around her heart after she said the words, a subtle feeling at first, like a feather being swept away on a sudden gust of wind. The feeling grew and grew until her burden of never pleasing her father blew completely away. She didn’t need to please him anymore. She only had to please herself. Lexie felt a smile crease her lips.
She rose from her perch on the ground and wrapped her arms around Mitch. Her eyes were dry now, her heart lighter. She gazed steadily at the man she loved. “I love you, Mitch. I’ll always love you, and if you’ll have me, I intend to spend the rest of my life with you.”
The wind moaned and sighed around the headstone, sounding
almost human. Lexie smiled, turned and clasped Mitch's hand.
Together they walked toward home and the rest of their lives.
The Secret Truth at Dare Ranch Page 15