Emotions that rocked her deep inside, intensified.
She squeezed her eyes tight, willing the feelings not to surface. Not now. If she couldn’t control her emotions, she’d have to quit working with him. And he’d made so much progress. He’d been giving a grand effort in his training, and if his vision didn’t return, there was still so much more she could show him, so much more she could open up for him.
Besides, she was only making it harder on herself. There was sure to come a time when the sparks that arced between them would fade from brilliance, snuffed out by her past.
“Katie, are you there? You’re awfully quiet,” he breathed, easing her back to reality.
Her entire body trembled now, an uncontrollable shaking that stemmed from deep within. For months she’d run ragged, fighting to keep the walls she’d erected firmly in place. If someone breached that barrier, the secret she’d diligently hidden would be exposed.
But right here…right now, she ached to have a shoulder to lean on. An arm to support her.
She startled as Joseph settled his hands on her shoulders, then lightly slid them down her arms.
“You’re trembling,” he said, his voice husky.
She swallowed hard, staring up at him. Hugging her arms tight to her chest, she fought against her unruly emotions.
Every nerve ending sprang to life as he trailed his fingers, whisper-soft, to the nape of her neck. Cradling her head in his hand, he inched closer and drew her to his chest.
Katie stiffened, feeling his hard upper body beneath her cheek. Curling her arms snuggly at her chest, she warred against the innate need to feel protected, cared for. She teetered on the edge. But as he lightly stroked her hair, trailing his fingers to her back, calm settled over her like a thick blanket.
His warm breath filtered through her thick tresses and she melted against his chest. Drawing in a quivering breath, she took in the woodsy male scent that was Joseph. She uncurled one fist, placing her fingertips reverently against the rigid muscular wall in front of her, feeling his untapped power beneath her touch.
He rested his chin on top of her head, and a rush of warmth poured over her as though she’d just stepped into glorious, welcoming sunshine.
“I know that you probably regret coming out here to work with me.” His voice grew rough with emotion. “Even on my good days, I’ve taken out a lot of frustration on you.”
She wanted to stop him, realizing that he’d misunderstood her, but she couldn’t find her voice. She was completely overcome by the sensations he stirred inside her.
“Don’t let my gruff exterior scare you, Katie. I’d never—never hurt you.” Like a hearth fire’s soothing glow, his husky voice penetrated the swirl of emotion. “I care too much about you.”
Joseph could kick himself for how he’d responded to Katie yesterday—embracing her like he did and saying what he had. But she’d been so upset about Ellie—and rightly so. Ellie was not doing well and Ben had put her on strict bed rest until the baby arrived.
Joseph’s heart had squeezed at the compassion and care he’d seen in Katie, and he’d relished the few moments when he’d held her close. It had felt so right. She had felt so right in his arms. It had taken every bit of strength he had to finally release her.
Now, as he stood outside the church waiting for Ben, he still didn’t feel as though he had control over his traitorous heart. He’d done his best to rein in his runaway emotions around Katie, but his heart beat sure and strong, the ancient rhythm pervading every breath, thought and moment. Even knowing she was most likely there in church this morning set his pulse to pounding.
Everything about her tugged at Joseph’s heart, making him want to comfort her, encourage her, protect her. And for some reason, he couldn’t help but wonder if maybe breaking through the barriers she’d set up around herself might be the biggest challenge he’d ever faced.
But considering his uncertain future, he couldn’t allow himself to get too close. He’d spent far too much time thinking of Katie. The way her gentleness soothed his deep-seated fear and the way her patience had given him needed confidence. She’d made him feel like a man again.
Turning his face to the cool breeze, he marveled at how he’d become captivated so quickly. But from what he’d heard, she’d had the same effect on others, too, winning hearts like some long-lost heroine.
“Hey, there, Joseph!” a voice called out, startling him from his musings. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”
Joseph turned toward the familiar voice. “Sam?”
“It’s me, all right!” Dry grass crunched beneath Sam’s feet as he approached Joseph. “Am I ever glad to see you.”
Joseph stretched out his hand to give Sam a firm handshake and wasn’t surprised to find himself pulled into a manly embrace. When Sam released his hold, Joseph noted how his friend seemed more filled out than the last time he’d seen him. His shoulders felt broader and his chest fuller.
“Good to have you back in town, Sam,” he said, resisting the awkwardness that suddenly assailed him.
But if anyone could put him at ease, it was Sam. His friend had a way of making others feel comfortable, no matter what the circumstance. Joseph would never forget that day, years ago, when thirteen-year-old Jacob returned to school after sustaining burns in a barn fire. Humiliation had been written all over the boy’s face as he clearly avoided interaction with other kids. But at the first recess, Sam made a point to draw him into a game of kickball. From then on, it was as though everyone else seemed to know how to respond.
“It’s good to be back,” Sam replied, his voice sounding deeper than Joseph remembered.
“I heard that you arrived yesterday.”
“I can believe that. Boulder’s gossip mill seems to be in perfect working order.”
He threw his head back and laughed, knowing full well that he’d been the brunt of informational tidbits lately. “Ha! That’s an understatement. And to think we used to make sport out of feeding it, then watching it fly into high gear.”
“We were shameless, you and me. I’m not sure how we both ended up riding the right side of the fence.”
He grinned at the strand of memories that inched through his mind. “Glad I got it out of my system when I was young.”
“I’m sorry about your accident. I heard about it when I got into town.” Sam’s voice sounded solemn but not pitying, and for that Joseph was thankful. “How are you getting along?”
Joseph pulled his shoulders back, not surprised at the way Sam cut a sure path right through formalities. “Ah…I’m great, just have to put up with this ridiculous costume for another day or two.” He gestured to the bandage circling his head. “Should be good as new in a couple of days.”
“I understand you’re going to go see a doctor in Denver?”
“I leave tomorrow.” Joseph nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Are you planning on being in town for a while?”
“That’s the plan.” Sam gave a long exhale. “What do you say we get in some fishing while I’m here?”
“I wouldn’t miss an opportunity to show you up with a pole again. You and I both know who always caught the biggest—”
“Well, well, well,” Sam breathed, his voice thick with adoration. “There she is.”
“Who?” Amused, Joseph couldn’t help but grin.
“Only the most beautiful woman in Boulder. Wait—make that this side of the Rockies.” In the long moment of silence that followed, Joseph could almost imagine his friend’s adoring gaze fixed on the little lady as though she were a rare jewel. “I was smitten by her at first sight, Joseph. Smitten.”
“That captivating, eh?” Curiosity nipped at him like a pack of unruly pups.
“Yep. That captivating,” Sam agreed in a case-closed kind of tone.
“You never were one to miss a pretty lady. You’ve had a soft spot for them as long as I’ve known you.”
“What about you?” Sam shot back with a nudge to Joseph
’s arm. “If my memory serves me right, I think we had our fair share of fights over girls throughout the years. We scrapped over the best of them, didn’t we, Joseph?”
He winced. “Maybe we did.”
“No maybes about it. That’s probably why neither of us got married. In the end, we always deferred to one another.”
On a low chuckle, he nodded his agreement. “So, who is she? I probably know her.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure. She said she’s new to Boulder. I met her yesterday—right after I arrived on the afternoon stage. What a way to start off my stay here.”
Was Sam referring to Julia? He always did seem drawn to brunettes. And if he kept himself as tailored as he did the last time Joseph had seen him, then Julia was sure to notice.
It had started irritating Joseph how Julia couldn’t seem to help dropping hints about his attire. Apparently she preferred a fancy three-piece suit, and frankly, he’d wear nothing rather than be confined to a suffocating suit day in, day out.
“Come with me. I want you to meet her.” Sam grasped Joseph’s arm and started walking.
“Nah. Really, I don’t need to meet her.” He slowed to a stop. If it was Julia, there’d be awkwardness that he had every hope of avoiding.
“Are you sure?” Sam spoke low, leaning toward him. “I want to know what you think. You’re a good judge of character.”
Wanting to be good-natured about this, Joseph shoved down his unease—after all, it wasn’t every day he got to do a favor for his friend. He conceded with a sigh.
“That’s the spirit!” Sam maneuvered Joseph forward once again. “I just want to know what you think of her.”
“Just don’t say I never did anything for you.”
“Good morning, ma’am.” Sam’s gallantry had the corner of Joseph’s mouth quirking.
He sniffed the air around him, searching for Julia’s strong perfume on the breeze. It’d be a dead giveaway this close, but surprisingly the air was free of the choking scent.
When Joseph felt Sam ease to a stop, he sidestepped out of his friend’s grasp.
“I’d like to introduce you to a friend of mine.” The timbre of Sam’s voice was as smooth as a finely sanded heirloom. “This is Joseph Drake, we go way back. Joseph, this is—”
“Good morning, Joseph.”
He snapped his focus down, furrowing his brow. “Katie?”
“You know each other?” Sam chuckled.
Gritting his teeth, Joseph tried not to show his shock, but confusion swirled around him. A stranger, he’d bargained on, seeing as how new people were moving into the area almost daily. And Julia, he wouldn’t have been shocked by because she seemed to have a knack for spreading her presence around town.
But Katie? Sam had set his sights on Katie?
Joseph swallowed hard, the hair prickling at the back of his neck as the realization sank in. A herd of emotions raced through his mind, the front-runner being irritation. That Sam was referring to Katie had him thoroughly unsettled. Even though Joseph had laid no claim to her other than as his teacher, why did he feel sick knowing that Sam had taken notice?
Shrugging his shoulders, he jammed his hands into his pockets. “Katie’s my instructor. She’s been working with me.”
“You didn’t tell me that you knew her.” Sam chuckled.
“You didn’t ask,” Joseph responded wryly. “And I couldn’t exactly see her, remember? I figured you’d stumbled across someone new in town that I hadn’t met since I’ve been laid up.”
“Well, what do you know?”
“Yeah,” he agreed under his breath. His jaw muscles clenched tight. “What do you know?”
“How are you today, Joseph?” Katie asked, breaking his ire.
“Just fine.” He tried to shove off his shock. “Yourself?”
“I’m well, thank you.” She paused for a moment, then said, “You’re probably really looking forward to your appointment?”
“That I am.”
“You better believe I’ll be thinking of you as you go, my friend,” Sam said, giving Joseph’s shoulder a firm squeeze. “I hate to cut out so soon here, but I’m being flagged down over by the wagons. I’ll catch up with you later, all right?”
Joseph nodded. “Sounds good. You know where to find me.”
“Miss Ellickson, it has been a pleasure seeing you once again.” Sam’s voice was low with sincerity, and Joseph could easily imagine him sweeping his hat off on a dramatic bow.
“Nice to see you, too,” Katie responded with equal sincerity that had Joseph inwardly cringing.
When Sam strode away, Joseph couldn’t help speculating what kind of eye contact had transpired between the two of them just then. He set his back teeth at the grim possibilities that were floating through his mind, but when Katie moved a step closer, that pleasing lily scent of hers distracted him.
“I hate to say it, but it looks like you’ve been left high and dry again,” she said next to him.
“Yeah. It appears that way.” He chuckled, sweeping his focus around as if confirming that fact. “Guess there’s no sympathy for the wounded guy, huh? That’s just fine by me, as long as I’m not left here all night, there’s no harm done.”
“Well, rest assured, Joseph, I won’t let that happen.”
“Thank you kindly, ma’am.” He tipped his head toward her and smiled.
“So, how are you really feeling about your appointment Tuesday?”
Joseph raked a hand through his hair. “I’m anxious, nervous, excited…. How’s that for emotions?”
Katie sliced the air through her teeth on an inhale. “That pretty much covers most of them.”
“One minute I’m chomping at the bit to go and get it over with,” he said, balling his fists tight. “So I can move on with my life—whatever it looks like. The next minute, I’m climbing the walls with excitement that I’ll actually see again.”
“Oh, I hope so, Joseph,” she breathed, touching his arm for a brief second. “I really do. We’ll definitely have to celebrate when you get home.”
“We will. You’ll still be here, won’t you?” he asked, selfishly hoping that she wouldn’t head back to Iowa—ever.
“I’ll be here.”
“When I can see again,” he focused down at her, “I’ll enjoy every sunrise, every sunset, every cloudy sky—” he cut himself off, shaking his head as doubts suddenly assailed him. “But then when I think about the possibility of being permanently blind…” he continued, jamming his hands into his pockets and grimacing. He swallowed hard. “If I can’t see anything more than the gray shadows when Ben removed the bandages two weeks ago, I don’t know what I’ll do, Katie. I really don’t.”
“I’m sorry, Joseph, that must be very difficult.” Her voice…her sweet understanding ways, gave him such comfort.
“I mean, I try not to even think about being blind because if I do, I get scared—and angry. Really angry. At myself for being careless, at the world for being sighted,” he said, his mouth drawing into a tight line. “And at God if He doesn’t answer my prayer for healing.”
After a long, not uncomfortable moment of silence, Katie finally spoke. “I’m sorry you’re going through this. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to consider the possibility and what all of that would mean for you.”
Angling his head down, he dug the toe of his boot into the hard ground. As good as it was to admit how he really felt to someone, he was determined to keep things light. “Yeah! I mean, what do you do with someone like me who’s used to being self-sufficient?” He held his arms out as if offering himself. “If I can’t see, I’d have to find some kind of employment, because I’m sure as anything not cut out for the ladies’ quilting circle.”
Katie gave a wistful sigh. “Yes, I don’t imagine you’d be welcome there. After all, they do call it the ladies’ quilting circle.”
Jamming his hands on his hips, he cocked his head to the side. “Who knows, maybe they’ll make an exception.”
> “Probably not,” she retorted, her quiet laughter putting him so at ease.
“Well, I guess I’ll have to ford that creek if I get to it. For now, however, I’m going to ask you for a lead home seeing as how Ben must’ve gotten caught up again.”
“Absolutely. I’d be glad to.”
“All of the worrying, excitement and outings are tiring.” On a hearty exhale, he puffed out his cheeks as he reached for her arm. “Between this snappy little teacher that’s been running me ragged and the—”
“Ha! That’s not a very nice thing to say, Mr. Drake,” she retorted, her voice filled with mock exasperation. “I might not be so willing if you keep that up.”
“Nah…you’ll walk with me because you feel sorry for me with these bandages on and all,” he teased.
Her light laughter was the most wonderful music to his ears. “Not hardly, sir. I do, however, enjoy your company.”
Chapter Eight
Joseph had been to Denver dozens of times. But none of his experiences had ever been like this. Every sound within earshot seemed amplified tenfold. The nickering horses—their hooves clomping on the barren ground, the carriages creaking across the rutted roads and the boardwalk echoing with the click of boots.
Standing at the entrance to the stagecoach house, his nerves buzzed with all the sensations. His ears rang from countless unfamiliar voices coming from every direction.
He pulled back his shoulders and steadied himself against the rough-hewn clapboard at his back. His journey to Denver hadn’t exactly started the way he’d planned. After Ben had shown up early this morning, announcing that he was unable to go along, frustration had hit hard and fast. Joseph had anticipated this day like his next breath. This appointment was his doorway to freedom from the suffocating confines of blindness. But when Ben went on to explain that he couldn’t leave because Ellie’s condition was shaky at best, Joseph didn’t give the appointment a second thought.
That Ben had asked Katie and her Uncle Sven to accompany him instead set Joseph’s thoughts on a completely different course, driving him into a dense thicket of emotions. He didn’t know whether to be glad for another opportunity to be with her, to hear her sweet mellow voice, feel her warm gentle touch. Or be irritated at having to wrestle his rebellious emotions into submission again.
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