He hesitated, glancing at his daughter. ‘If you don’t mind, I’d love one. I’m Chris, by the way. I forgot to say.’
‘I was impressed by the way you leapt over the fence. Are you a gymnast?’
He smiled. ‘Far from it, but I spend time in the gym when I can. It tires me and relaxes me at the same time. Not that I usually need tiring.’
That smile again! Faith felt amazingly warmed by it. Also perturbed. ‘Come up to the house. Molly has had a sandwich, I hope you don’t mind. Would you like one?’
‘I don’t want to put you out. I brought provisions with me. And you’ve been very good when you don’t even know us.’
‘You’ll get your chance at being good back,’ she said. ‘That’s how the village works.’
‘Then, yes, I’d love a bite to eat.’
‘For filling, I’ve got some local ham.’
‘Wonderful. When we get settled you must tell me the best shops.’
She went into the kitchen, quickly assembled a tray. Why was she going to all this trouble? Because they were going to be neighbours, she told herself. That was all.
She sighed. No, she thought honestly. She was attracted to this man. That was not a good idea for all sorts of reasons. It was also a startling one. She never felt this way about casual acquaintances. She needed to sort out her reactions and then be a bit more distant.
She carried the tray out onto the patio, liking the way he stood up as she approached. He was standing quite close to her. For a moment she saw a look in his eyes that she recognised – and suspected that her eyes were transmitting the same message. Chris was as attracted to her as she was to him. Oh dear. Now what?
She poured the tea, gestured for him to help himself from the plate of sandwiches. Molly slid off her seat to go exploring down the garden.
‘Has she been OK?’ he asked.
‘Yes, no trouble at all. Though she did start getting anxious about you.’
He rubbed the back of his neck. ‘Look, I wouldn’t normally say anything, but as we are going to be neighbours and you’ll probably see quite a bit of Molly in the garden, I think it’s important that you understand about her. I’m telling you because I don’t want you blaming her for the way she acts sometimes, especially if she’s noisy. It’s really not her fault.’
Whatever was he going to say? Faith wasn’t at all sure she wanted to know but, ‘Go on,’ she said. How could she not if Chris felt it had to be said, despite it hurting him. And he was hurting. Faith could tell.
He took a quick breath. ‘Molly’s mother and I are divorced. After Molly was born Lorraine suffered from baby blues – it’s not uncommon. But things got worse and slowly she lapsed into full clinical depression. I was desperate. I did everything I could, but it got so that she hated me and blamed me for the state she was in. In the end I had to accept what the doctors said – that alone, she would be able to pull herself out of it the way she wanted to. She simply didn’t want me around. So we parted and I kept Molly. But it hasn’t been easy for any of us. Molly got really messed up by it all.’
This was something Faith had come across before. Post-natal depression of that intensity was very rare, and always tragic. But it happened. ‘And you still feel guilty?’ she guessed.
‘Yes, of course. About both Molly and Lorraine.’ Then, in a different tone, ‘This is wonderful bread. You must tell me where to buy it.’
Fair enough, Faith thought. He’s confided what the neighbourhood needs to know and doesn’t want to go any further. Was he warning her off? Had he felt that he and she might be ...
But now it was his turn to be curious. ‘Do you live here on your own?’
It was a graceful way of putting it. She nodded. ‘I’ve got my work and that is enough to keep me happy. No man in my life.’
The atmosphere changed infinitesimally. ‘But there was one once?’
There wasn’t any need for her to be as free with her history as he had been with his. ‘I’m always busy. I’m a career woman. I’ve got male friends, plenty of them. But no one in particular.’
‘Daddy! Come and look! What is it?’
Chris smiled at her, raised his eyebrows. ‘When do children stop asking questions?’
She grinned. ‘Never. It’s just that as they get older it’s called scientific curiosity.’
She watched as he walked over to Molly and hunkered down with her to examine one of the rose bushes. He walks well, she thought. He’s at ease in his body. She felt a flutter of apprehension. Less than an hour since she had met him for the first time – yet each minute made him seem more and more attractive. But they’d only just met! There was so much about him that she didn’t know. And she didn’t want – or need – a man!
He walked back, holding his daughter’s hand.
‘It was a ladybird and it moved,’ the little girl said, enchanted. ‘It was red with black spots. I’ve seen them in pictures, but I didn’t know they were real! Daddy told me what to say. “Ladybird, ladybird, fly away home. Your house is on fire, your children are gone.” And it did fly away.’
‘I should think so too,’ said Faith.
Chris didn’t sit down. ‘We’ve bothered you enough,’ he said. ‘It’s been lovely to meet you and to think that Molly and I have made our first friend here in Little Allaby, but now I have to get her bathed and there’s a fair amount of arranging to do. And a lot of stuff coming up later.’
‘Of course. Have you got a job nearby?’
‘Quite close, yes. I’ve just taken a post at Dale Head hospital. I’m going to be the new Obstetrics and Gynaecology consultant there. I start work next week.’
Faith felt herself blanch. Her head reeled as she grappled with what he had just said. This couldn’t be happening! The man who had got her job was living next door! And she liked him. It was all too much. She clutched at the arms of her chair for support.
Chris saw her shock. ‘Are you all right, Faith?’ he asked, obviously concerned. ‘You’ve gone pale.’
‘I’m fine, fine,’ she gasped. ‘You are Mr Ford?’
‘Yes, but how did you ...?’
Faith knew her voice was too high, but she couldn’t get it down to normal. ‘It’s an interesting coincidence, you being a neighbour. I’m your Senior Registrar.’ She forced her hands to loosen, laid them in her lap. ‘We’re going to be working together.’
And that was going to be very, very hard.
* * *
Chris sighed as he leaned over the bath, dripped in the favourite bubble mixture, whirled the water round with his hand. Bedtime with Molly was often a trial. In fact, life with Molly was often a trial. He loved her more than he could say, he understood her problems, he’d even consulted a child psychologist for advice about her behaviour. He might be an expert in O & G, but he wasn’t too proud to ask for help when it was needed.
The child psychologist in Birmingham had said what he had already worked out. ‘Chris, there’s no great worry. And no medical treatment needed either. She’ll grow out of these tantrums. You know – everybody knows – that you’ve done everything possible for Molly and Lorraine over the past few years. But Molly has seen the deterioration in Lorraine, must have overheard arguments, furious rows, not known how to react when Lorraine was in one of her silent phases. And yes, your parents looking after her while you worked was obviously the most sensible thing to do – but they’ve gone overboard making it up to her and she’s got spoilt. So now Molly is taking it out on you. The bottom line is that she is scared that you too might move out of her life. What she needs is to be able to feel confident in your love, to feel certain that you won’t abandon her. That might take some time. Until she does feel confident, she’ll behave badly by the polite world’s standards. It’s the only way she knows of getting your full attention.’
‘I’m going to see she gets all the attention she needs,’ vowed Chris. ‘My new post will be less stressful, that’s why I took it. And it won’t take up so much of my off-duty time
. Molly will be my life.’
The child psychiatrist coughed. ‘I’m glad to hear it. There’s just one thing more. Be careful not to form any ... any fresh relationship so that Molly feels left out. That would only make things worse.’
Chris thought about this now as he called for his daughter and a little naked girl ran into the bathroom. He lifted her up, slowly slid her into the water. ‘Do you like your new bedroom, sweetheart?’ he asked. ‘We can paint it any colour you like.’
‘Pink. I want pink. Faith is nice. Can I go there again?’
‘We must be careful not to bother her. She’s a hard-working lady and ...’ He saw the lower lip begin to quiver. ‘I’m sure we can see her now and again.’ He wondered if Faith would be as happy about that as Molly. His daughter might have been no trouble today, but she could be very demanding.
Molly settled down to enjoy her bath. He had wondered if she might be overtired after the long car journey from Birmingham, but for once there were no bedtime tantrums, no crying and not letting him leave her bedroom. He had thought she was bound to be upset at this huge change. But surprisingly she was not. Either the novelty or more fresh air than she was used to this evening must have affected her.
He read her a story – well, all right, two stories – then kissed her forehead and held her hand. And then she was asleep. Looking at the small angelic face, Chris felt a surge of love. There wasn’t anything he would not do for his daughter. She’d been messed up so much already. For the time being he had to devote his life to her. He turned on the child alarm and went downstairs.
There was a conservatory at the back of the house. He sat there, a small glass of whisky in his hand and watched the sun go down over the hills. It was lovely. He was going to enjoy living here.
He could look down his garden, see across to Faith’s house, and see her lights springing on. For a brand-new acquaintance, she’d been very good with Molly. Probably, he had to admit, a bit better than him. He remembered her saying that she’d brought up younger sisters; that could explain it.
Faith. For a moment he treated himself to the pleasure of just thinking how gorgeous she was. She was a striking woman. She carried herself well, ‘walked tall’ with ease and grace. She was the kind of woman people would turn to look at as she passed them in the hospital corridor. He wondered what she was like with patients. Brisk? Friendly? Or both? Her figure was nicely rounded, the curves quite obvious in the thin T-shirt she had been wearing. And her long legs seemed to go on for ever. Dark hair cut in a short, hospital-efficient bob. When she relaxed her face was beautiful – perfectly heart-shaped with generous lips, dark brown eyes. But Faith – though she’d been calm on the surface – hadn’t seemed to relax an awful lot. Several times her expression had been serious, her smile only fleeting. Did everybody have problems? He wondered if he could help at all.
No. Chris shook his head decisively. There was no place in his life for impossible dreams. He had felt an instant attraction to her and knew very well she felt the same. But he had also noticed her backing away when he asked if she had a man in her life. If she had hang-ups about relationships, that would make two of them.
He frowned, swirling the amber liquid in his glass. Living so close, they were bound to see a lot of each other. Molly would want to visit Faith again for sure. Once she took a liking to people, she wanted to see them over and over again. And that being the case, it would be easy for him to get to know Faith. But Chris remembered the child psychologist’s warning. He daren’t risk Molly’s happiness by forming an attachment to Faith, much as the thought tempted him. He would have to keep her at a friendly distance.
Not that he wanted any kind of attachment. After Lorraine ... well he had learned his lesson. He wasn’t going though all that guilt, despair and sheer helplessness again.
Another thought intruded – was the distance already there? He had seen the shock in Faith’s face when she discovered who he was. He had been jolted himself at the coincidence. But after the shock had come another reaction. She had cooled towards him. Well, he couldn’t blame her. A new broom coming into the department, asking questions, making changes. Obviously she would be wary. And a professional distance was the best thing possible to begin with. It would make it easier for him too.
But there was that physical attraction ... no!
One thing, one principle was laid down, hard as granite wherever you worked. No patient would suffer because of staff’s personal feelings. They had to get on somehow. At the hospital certainly, if not as neighbours. But what was he to do when Molly – as she certainly would – wanted to call on her new friend next door twenty-four hours a day?
Chapter Two
In the end, the problem was shelved for a while. Next morning Chris found a note pushed through his front door.
“I’m not around for a bit. Family crisis. Ring Jack Kirk if you need to know anything. The other neighbours are all very helpful too!. Love to Molly. Faith.”
It was thoughtful of her to let him know. She must have called very early, before he was up. He wondered if this was on purpose. That she didn’t want to see him again until they had established a working relationship. He didn’t consider that she might have posted the note the night before.
Later in the morning he took Molly for a walk through the village. He had only cast a rapid glance around when he’d dashed up to view properties, but now came to appreciate it. They called at the Post Office with its attached shop and he was pleasantly surprised at the quality of food that was for sale. He walked Molly past the primary school she would be attending, then, hearing the cheerful shouts of children in the playground, they doubled back and went in to arrange an induction day. Then they stood on the bridge and looked down at the river bubbling below them. ‘Ducks!’ shouted Molly. ‘Daddy, look, ducks! Can we go down and paddle and give them some bread? Look, there are some people there doing it.’
‘Not today, sweetheart, we haven’t got any bread. But soon.’
He felt his worries easing. He was going to enjoy living here. It would be simpler to sort out his personal life in a completely new place.
The sun was out, so for lunch they called in at the Earnshaw Arms. He had a pint of bitter watching Molly enjoy herself in the play area. The meal was plain but good, and eating it in the garden added to the treat. This was a new life, he thought, and miraculously Molly was behaving. He only hoped it continued that way.
When he went to pay he chatted to the publican, telling him that he and Molly had just moved into the area.
‘Ah,’ said the publican. ‘Near Dr Taylor, did you say? She’s a good doctor. When my daughter was in Dale Head with her first baby, Dr Taylor sorted her out. People think a lot of her round here.’ The man looked troubled. ‘Poor lass. We were all sorry when ...’ his voice trailed away.
‘Sorry?’ Chris asked.
But the man seemed to think he had gone far enough. ‘Nothing. I’m sure you’ll be happy here. Hope to see you and the little one in again.’
Chris realised that there was something the man was not going to tell him, so didn’t try to press it. He would find out in time.
He enjoyed his walk but there was trouble with Molly on the way back. She was tiring and wanted to see her new friend again – and had a small tantrum when Chris told her Faith wasn’t at home.
‘I can’t help it that Faith is at work,’ he said. ‘She is a doctor in the same hospital where I’m going to be working soon. Doctors are busy people, you know they are.’
Molly’s lip quivered. ‘Want to see her. Show me.’
Chris considered. It wasn’t a bad idea. Molly liked to have a picture in her head of where her people were at any given time. It helped to make her feel more secure. And Dale Head had a nursery and a play scheme for staff children for when their parents were working – it was one of the things that had attracted him to the position. With any luck, he could be quite clever here. ‘OK,’ he said. ‘But you have to be good.’
He
was not due to start work at the hospital until next week, but he’d always intended to visit for a preliminary look round, maybe a chat with as many of his new staff as possible. This afternoon was as good a time as any for the first visit. He would have to dress a little more professionally, though.
‘Are we going to see Faith?’ Molly asked, submitting to having her face and hands washed and her dress brushed down – where did children acquire so much dust?
‘Perhaps,’ he said. ‘If she isn’t with a patient.’ He realised he had no idea of her duty schedule or what sort of “family crisis” she might be involved with. Not to worry. Freddie Myers would know. He’d ask him when he got there. At Molly’s anxious look he said more firmly, ‘I hope so.’ Even if he was not exactly sure why. He wanted to see Faith – but he was fairly sure he ought not to.
Work. This was what Faith was good at. She knew exactly what was going on in her department – had all the threads laid out in her mind, ready to trace back to the right person should there be a problem. If you worked hard, got engrossed, then there wasn’t room in your head for other things. She had worked like this before. When the greatest heartache of all had struck, when she had been devastated by the loss of Mike, her job and her family had helped her through.
First, the morning ward round. Usually she enjoyed this. There were difficulties of course, but it pleased her to see those hopeful mothers whose problems she could deal with. And this had been a good morning – so far.
But now there was a case she could well do without. Ella Greerson. She sighed as she checked the notes, and then pushed open the door of a single-occupancy side ward.
‘I know what I want and I’m having it,’ said the girl in the bed. ‘It’s my decision and you can’t stop me. I’m eighteen. I’m an adult. You’ve got to do what I want.’
Harsh words, but the voice was weak and trembled slightly.
‘Good morning Ella,’ Faith said calmly. ‘We can talk about decisions in a minute. The first thing though is, how are you feeling today? That was quite a scare you gave your employers yesterday.’
The Lakeland Doctor's Decision Page 2