by Tesa Devlyn
Stiff and cold, Liana snuggled under the down comforter, and cried herself to sleep.
Chapter Twelve
Thursday morning moved like an eternity. Liana stayed in bed until ten, exhausted and broken. Michael didn’t call about last night, and Frank didn’t call to blame her for every wrong in his life. She stumbled into the kitchen to fix a pot of coffee, and a popped a piece of bread in the toaster. Since she planned to work from home today, she stayed in her loungewear and checked emails.
At noon, Brittany called for permission to go shopping with Meagan after school. She’d leave for her dad’s on the first day of her holiday break, so she wanted to start her Christmas shopping. Liana agreed, partly to make Brittany happy and partly to give herself more time to pull herself together before her daughter found her red-eyed and miserable. Restless, she started a load of laundry and took meat from the freezer for dinner. In robotic motion, she made a sandwich and took a couple of bites.
Michael had promised to call. He probably woke this morning and thanked his lucky stars he’d gone home last night. Did he regret his involvement with her?
At two-thirty, Stan called to relay a message from a new client. She forced a cheerful tone she didn’t feel and jotted down their email address and cell numbers.
“Are you all right, Liana? You don’t sound like yourself.”
So much for her act.
“I’m fine, Stan. I’m having pre-holiday depression since Brittany’s going to her dad’s for vacation.”
“Hang in there, kid. It’ll all work out. Say, aren’t you going to San Diego to visit your family for some of the time Brittany’s with her dad?”
“Yes. I’ll fly back on the twenty-seventh.” She assured her broker she’d be fine and ended the call so she could email the prospective clients.
Good lord, what was she doing? She looked down at her attire and shook her head. She might own attractive loungewear, but she didn’t intend to become a recluse who never got dressed.
One thing at a time.
Frank wouldn’t remain silent for long. He’d plan a new strategy to spring on her. She had to toughen up and be ready. Her heart ached over losing Michael, but Brittany had to be her first concern.
She slipped into sports socks and running shoes and braved the cold air for a run. Physical exertion opened the valve on her stress and drained the tension from her neck and shoulders. She ran for twenty minutes before she circled and returned home to shower and dress in a pair of comfortable jeans and a long sleeved T-shirt.
Regardless of what happened with Michael, it was time to start over, begin a new life—this time for real. Geography hadn’t accomplished the deep down changes she needed.
She’d clean out her closet—sort through the boxes she hadn’t unpacked from her move—get rid of stuff she should have tossed when she packed up the house in San Francisco.
If Michael continued with the remodel, her bedroom would be the next project and he needed space to work. Brittany’s bedroom would be like new when she returned from Frank’s. If Michael wanted to work in her house; if Brittany returned from Frank’s.
“Stop it! Just stop it!” She stepped in front of her bedroom mirror and braced her hands on the dresser. Staring at her reflection, she narrowed her eyes. “Snap out of it! You made one mistake, but you didn’t go as far as you could have. You stopped and did the right thing, so why do you still punish yourself!”
Steely determination looked back at her. Her determination. The backbone that had given her the strength to stay married to Frank for ten years. The strength she’d pulled on to get through the divorce and the bevy of emotion that followed.
She loved Michael, but if he couldn’t handle her near affair over four years ago, while she was married to someone else, she’d survive and move on. Liana pushed away from the dresser and brushed her hands against her denim covered thighs. Like her literal baggage, she’d start weeding out her personal baggage. No more guilt trips over her dinners and drinks with Ryan, or the night she so easily could have lost herself in his arms. No more guilt for not telling Jack about her pregnancy before it was too late.
Enough.
Life was a jumble of choices, good and bad, and she’d learned from every one of them. They all shaped the successful—yes dammit—successful woman she’d become.
Tearing into her closet, she made piles in categories, stringing two of them into the living room. One to box up and take to the thrift store, one to go through at a more leisurely pace. Liana wasn’t in the mood to go through the sentimental items. Today, she had to be tough.
Halfway to the bedroom for another armload of stuff, a thought flashed through her mind. “Frank could be harassing Mom.” She grabbed the landline and punched out her mom’s number. Cathy answered on the second ring.
“Liana, it’s so good to hear from you. How are you and Brittany?”
“Has Frank called you?”
“No, I haven’t talked to Frank since Thanksgiving. Why?”
“I was afraid he might harass you and Daddy.” Liana sighed and sank to the couch.
“I pity the fool if he tries to turn us against you. You know how your father and I feel about Frank and what he’s done to you.”
“I know. I’m just on overload today.”
“From the big weekend? We all covered a lot of personal history, but it was healthy.”
“The meeting isn’t what distresses me, Mom. I went out with Michael last night.”
“Ah, the famous Michael Brittany keeps talking about.”
Liana smiled for the first time all day. “Brittany talks about Michael?”
“Oh yes, it’s clear she likes him. She’s called me twice since we left on Saturday to tell me about her life in Montana and how much she likes it there. The conversations always include Michael and his son, Leif.”
Liana sighed. “I finally told Michael about almost having an affair. I should have told him before we ever went to dinner.”
“I have a suspicion dinner wasn’t the crucial part of the evening.” Cathy drew out her words to make her point clear.
“You’re right.” Liana punched her favorite red pillow and fluffed it. “For the first time since my divorce, I allowed myself to be intimate with a man. Not just any man. Oh, Mom if you could meet Michael, you’d know how safe I am with him.”
“Judging by Brittany’s enthusiasm and the way your voice sparkles when you mention him, I doubt he’s having second thoughts. He’s probably at work and possibly processing how quickly your relationship has moved.”
“Really? I mean, he’s attracted to me and he’s stuck it out through some challenges.”
“Honey, Frank did such a number on you. You’re a successful businesswoman, but you have no confidence in yourself as a person. Don’t chase Michael off with self-recriminations.”
“I’m trying, Mom. I had a face to face with myself a few minutes ago and realized I’d fallen into the same trap I’ve criticized in other people. The victim. A victim mentality that I’m guilty for all the misery in Frank’s life, and I owed Jack the truth, and I should have told Michael more, and on and on and on.”
“I’m glad to hear you talk like this, Li. I’ve been worried about you for a long time. You deserve to be happy, honey.”
“Thanks, Mom. Right now, what matters is Brittany and supporting her in her dreams and hopes. I need to be an example of stability for her to learn from.”
“Wow. I’m impressed. No matter what happens with Frank or Michael, Li, keep that goal and your spirit. If you need, Dad and I will fly up and spend time with you and Brittany.”
Liana pushed out a rush of breath. “I appreciate your offer, but I’ll be fine. I know that now.” She said goodbye and wandered into the den to set the cordless receiver back on the cradle.
New strength and well being started in her heart, and spread through her entire body. Her family understood and backed her. She’d taken control of her life.
She returned to
the living room and looked at the piles of clothes and memorabilia. She pressed her palm to her belly. She’d had unprotected sex last night. Michael’s baby could be growing inside her at this very moment.
“Wow. I could have another child.” Another child to raise on her own? No. She wouldn’t be alone regardless of how her relationship with Michael turned out. He’d never abandon his child. She’d never get so involved with a man incapable of taking care of his child. If she was pregnant, they’d always be connected, even if not in the way she longed to be connected with him.
She loved him.
She’d fallen head over heels for Michael Saxon and what he thought had the power to hurt her far more than anything Frank could say or do.
She’d go insane if he didn’t call soon!
Needing to keep busy, Liana dug into her cleaning project with a vengeance. She retrieved empty totes from the shed behind the house and designated one for keeping and two for going.
The phone rang.
Her heart fluttered.
Michael or Frank?
“Just answer the damn phone.” She glanced at the caller ID and hit the green button.
“Hello, Frank.”
“What in the hell are you doing?” His voice blasted through the connection.
Liana blinked and tightened her lips. “I’m cleaning house, Frank. Getting rid of things I should have tossed a long time ago.”
“Is your daughter one of the things you’re tossing?”
Liana resisted the urge to throw the phone across the room. The bastard! “No, Frank. I don’t toss people away like you do. I don’t hold things over people and manipulate them. Brittany is the most important person in my life. She doesn’t deserve to be lied to for another day.”
“You’re right. That’s exactly why I’m calling to tell her everything unless you call off your hot shot attorney and cancel this court date.”
“Why didn’t we have this discussion when you blessed us with your presence last weekend? Why call me now like you just saw the paperwork?”
“I wanted to check out your life in Montana. It’s clear you plan to wipe me out of my daughter’s life. No doubt with the help of your boyfriend.”
“What are you talking about? I’ve never wanted to take Brittany out of your life. When you started to act so unstable, distance seemed to be the answer. We’re happy here, Frank, and Brittany has made new friends.”
“Cancel the court date or I’ll tell her about the affair.”
“I’ll only cancel the court date if you agree to drop the alimony. You forget you have more at stake than I do. Tell Brittany about Ryan, and I’ll tell her about Jack. Actually, you know what? I’m going to tell her anyway. She deserves to learn about her real father.”
“Real father! I’m the one who raised her. I was there from her birth until the day you took her away from me.”
The doorbell rang. Liana glanced out the window. Michael’s big black truck sat in her drive way. She hurried to the door, swung it open, and drank in the sight of him.
Michael raised a brow. His gaze darted from her to the phone and back. She nodded and gestured for him to enter.
“Liana, are you there? Did I hear the doorbell?” Frank shouted so loud, Liana held the phone away from her ear.
Her gaze hungrily followed Michael as he walked into the kitchen and helped himself to a cup of coffee. Worn blue jeans and a chambray shirt covered the body she’d learned so well the night before. He leaned against the counter, his demeanor casual, but his shoulders tense and his amber eyes alert.
“Yes, Frank. A very good friend of mine came over to help. So, what’s it going to be? Will you honor my request about the alimony, or risk losing Brittany completely?”
“Brittany won’t turn against me.”
“Don’t overestimate yourself, Frank. If you handle this like an adult, you can stay in her life.”
“Adult as in, adultery?”
“Can you honestly say you didn’t have affairs during our marriage?”
“Always making me the bad guy, aren’t you?”
“Frank, we had a dysfunctional marriage from day one. You never listened to me, or concerned yourself with my needs. Even after ten years of life with a man I couldn’t love, I didn’t cheat on you, but you didn’t believe me. I’m sick and tired of the blackmail and what you’ve done to my life and self-esteem.”
“I’m tired of being blamed for a loveless marriage. You were like sleeping with a corpse. Can you blame me for looking for some passion? You were an unfit wife, and you’re an unfit mother. I’m filing for full custody. When I’m finished, you can add child support to your alimony check.”
Liana gasped. “Are you delusional? No judge will give you full custody. You’ve gone over the edge, Frank. I don’t think you’re safe to be around. Where is Molly in all of this?”
Click.
Liana stared at the phone. “I don’t believe it! The SOB just hung up on me! He’s going for full custody and plans to force me into paying child support!”
Michael pushed away from the counter and walked toward her. “Does Brittany have her phone?”
“Of course.” Liana shook her head. “Would he call her now, before he calls his lawyer?”
“The man’s not rational. He’s going to do as much damage as he can.” He glanced at his watch. “Brittany’s out of school. Is she coming right home?”
“No.” Liana shook her head, her mind reeling. “She’s Christmas shopping with Shari and Meagan.”
“Call her and get them over here.”
Liana glanced around the room at the piles of mementos and old clothes; her resolve to reclaim her life and be strong. Now she trembled with anger and fear.
“What if he tells her everything? Who will she turn to?”
“You’ll fight him. Better the truth comes out now, Liana. You can’t protect Brittany anymore.” Michael flipped open her phone, searched the contacts and selected one before pressing the phone to his ear. He asked Brittany to come home immediately and not to answer any other calls. Not even from her dad.
Michael set Liana’s phone on the bar and pulled her against him, breathing in the floral scent of her hair. He’d hardly slept last night. He’d tossed and turned, reliving their lovemaking until he almost crawled out of bed and returned to her house.
The rest of the time, he agonized over joining his life with a woman who could turn to another man when her needs weren’t met. He’d lived through that situation one too many times. He didn’t plan to repeat history. Over the morning, he’d started to call her several times, but realized what he had to say needed to be said in person.
His arrival had been timely. Hearing Frank scream at Liana through a phone connection from clear across the room, showed what her life must have been like. Michael never treated Meredith like that, he’d never shout at her or guilt her into making love with him.
Frank had driven her into the other guy’s arms and Michael was thankful she’d ended the relationship with Ryan before it began. She might have mistakenly thought Ryan was the man of her dreams and Michael would never have met her.
He’d never justify infidelity, but circumstances were as individual as the people who created them.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t stay last night.”
“I didn’t think you’d be back.”
“Your confession blew me away.”
Liana wrapped her arms around his waist and kissed the tanned skin between the top two buttons of his chambray work shirt. She rested her head against his chest. “Infidelity ended your marriage. I understand how my indiscretion would cause doubts. Unhappy marriage or not, an affair is never the answer. Fortunately, I learned my lesson before it went too far. I wanted to tell you—give you the option of trusting me or not—but every time I started, I froze. Our relationship moved on and I found myself wanting one night to hold onto for the rest of my life.”
Michael pulled her closer. “Baby, Frank should have let you go
years ago. You were never in love with him. A man knows when he’s the only person holding a relationship together.”
Liana’s phone rang. Michael reluctantly let her leave his arms to answer it. She bumped a stack of old greeting cards and sent them off the edge of the table to the floor.
He braced himself for another rude call from Frank.
“Hi, Mom.”
Liana’s greeting to her mom gave him a measure of relief. Brittany was on her way home and Frank could be up to more no good.
“Oh, great. Mom. I’ll keep you posted. Sorry you had to get dragged into this.” She ended the call and set her phone on the coffee table.
Michael glanced at her from his crouched position while he gathered up the mementoes. “He called your mom.”
“It’s all happening just as I feared.” Liana covered her mouth with one hand and clutched her head with the other, her mossy eyes filled with tears.
Michael set the stack of cards on the coffee table and pulled her into his arms. Damn Frank Nash for hurting her.
The front door swung open. Brittany ran into the living room with Meagan and Shari right behind her. Michael stepped away from Liana. Brittany enveloped her mom in a big hug and a lump lodged in his throat. “Mom, are you all right?”
“I’m fine, honey.” Liana gazed into her daughter’s face. Brittany’s height and larger frame made her mother look small and delicate. Michael pressed his hands against their backs and completed the family connection he longed to expand.
“Oh, my God. Do you have cancer?” Tears welled in Brittany’s mahogany brown eyes.
“Heavens no, it’s nothing like that.” Liana’s breasts lifted on a huge breath. “Brittany, I need to tell you something very important. Do you want to talk out here, or in your room?”
Brittany glanced from Michael to Shari and Meagan. “We’re all family. We can talk here.”
Michael kissed Brittany’s forehead. “Why don’t we sit down?”