by Claire Adams
Not only were my hands torn up and bloodied, but my whole body felt like I was only moments away from collapsing. Every night when I crawled into bed, I couldn’t imagine being able to wake up and actually move my body. I couldn’t read a book and I could barely write my ideas down in my journal before the sleep took over. Yet, day after day, I was up and working again in the horse stables. I was proud of myself for not complaining and trying to fit in with everyone.
My job there was temporary and I knew that. I had a court hearing coming up and if I could just get through a few weeks of working, then I’d be able to get back to my normal life. Although, I was a little concerned that I wouldn’t ever be able to get back to any sort of normal life. Frank Gordano wanted me dead, even if I testified against him and he got sent away to jail, I wasn’t sure I would ever really be safe. It was one of many thoughts that rolled through my mind as I fell asleep at night.
Sarah was much more beautiful than the picture of her I’d seen in the main house. She had been wearing jeans that were tight enough for me to see every last curve of her beautiful body. And boy, did she have some fabulous curves. I wasn’t sure if I lusted after her so much because I hadn’t seen a woman in such a long time at the ranch, or if it was because I was actually attracted to her. But from where I stood, either option was perfectly fine. I wasn’t going to be able to go after her though; I knew that Sid had been joking with me, but I also knew that I could be pulled away from the ranch at any moment. But Sarah was going to make for some great fantasies when I was alone in my bed at night—if I could manage to stay awake long enough to think about her.
When lunchtime came, I hurried over to the gathering room and was one of the first men there to get lunch. Missing breakfast was my normal routine back at home, but sitting at a desk all morning hadn’t made me nearly as hungry as shoveling horse excrement did. I was famished and scooped the food into my mouth as fast as I could.
“Careful, youngin’, you’re going to give yourself a stomach ache.”
“Forest, I can’t go any slower. I swear I’m starving to death,” I said between bites. “It’s like I haven’t eaten for a week or something.”
“That’s what happens when you skip breakfast.”
Forest knew I had missed breakfast every single day I had been on the ranch so far. It felt like some sort of hazing that the guys were doing to me and I didn’t want to give in. From what I knew about hazing, it was important for me to keep my head up and keep pushing forward to prove I could withstand anything they put me through. I imagined they were getting up very quietly in the morning so they wouldn’t wake me up. Yet, I couldn’t imagine how they all woke up on time at all. It was a mystery.
Most of the men slept in the bunkhouse with me, but there were a few who had their own small cabins just outside the edge of the main house. Forest, who had a beautiful cabin out that way, as well as Walter—although I hadn’t seen Walter in a while.
“What happened to Walter?” I asked as I chewed my food.
“Oh, he moved on.”
Forest said it in such a matter-of-fact way that I almost didn’t want to ask any more questions. Sid had told me that there was pretty quick turnover in the ranch, but I hadn’t really thought it would happen so quickly.
“So you’re in charge now?”
“Yep.”
“Oh, I better get back to work then,” I joked. “How long have you been on the ranch?”
“Long enough.”
Forest was a man of very few words. He was about my age, although he looked much older than me. I could tell the hard work and time in the sun had worn down his body over the years. Yet, Forest worked harder than I did every single day and barely looked tired by the time we wrapped up dinner. It was a little depressing to realize just how out of shape I really was.
Over the last few weeks, I had felt weaker than I had my entire life. Sure, I went to the gym several times a week back home and even had my personal trainer; but nothing had prepared me for 12-to-15-hour days of physical labor. The physical work was much different than workouts at the gym and my body wasn’t taking too well to the changes. Although, I did feel like I had started to bulk up a little in my upper body. Maybe I would even come to enjoy my long days of physical labor.
“Man, if I could figure out how the hell to wake up in the morning, I would do it in an instant. Do you guys have some sort of trick or something?”
Forest just laughed at me and then went back to eating his meal. His red hair was dirty from working in the field that day. It was longer than mine and Forest had a red beard to go along with the long hair. Most of the men on the ranch had longer hair and beards, which I suspected was simply because they couldn’t find the time to get to a barber. The mornings and evenings were busy and I had struggled to find time to shave when I first arrived. But then I started doing it while I was in the shower to save time; that seemed to be working well for me. Although, I was the only one who kept a consistently clean shaven face.
“You’ll figure it out,” Forest answered me.
“I don’t think I will.”
“I’m going into town tomorrow if you want to get yourself a watch,” Forest said as he looked up at me.
“Nah, that’s okay, I don’t really care what time it is. I just work until you guys tell me to stop,” I laughed.
It was the truth; I didn’t really care about the time. I didn’t have any place to be and I certainly couldn’t go into town. So, working, eating, and sleeping were all I had to keep myself busy. What I needed was an alarm clock, but since none of the other men had blaring alarms going off in the morning, I didn’t think it was a good idea. I just had to figure out how the hell they silently woke themselves up each and every morning. It was a baffling mystery to me.
“Suit yourself.”
“Thanks though,” I said as I finished off the last of my lunch. “Do you know if Sarah is back there? I’m supposed to have her look at my hands.”
I held up my hands and watched Forest flinch at the sight of them. I had gotten used to the oozing and puss that was coming out of the blisters, but they didn’t look very appealing to have around food. I pulled them back and placed them on my lap again.
“Come on man, I’m trying to eat here,” he said then looked away. “She’s usually around back. Go that way,” he pointed toward the west.
“Thanks.”
My hands had hurt a lot when I first started getting blisters on them. But over the last few days, they were pretty much numb and I couldn’t feel them much at all. No one else used gloves unless they were loading large items or pulling the ropes. I hadn’t wanted to seem like a pussy so I had avoided using gloves as well, which was obviously a huge mistake. My hands weren’t used to the kind of work I was doing all the time and I finally decided the gloves Sarah had given me were worth using to avoid totally damaging the skin on my hands for the rest of my life.
“So you’re the local nurse, too,” I said as I came into the back room and saw Sarah pulling out some first aid equipment.
“I’m anything I need to be,” she replied flatly.
Sarah was busy; I hated to take up her time, but I obviously didn’t know how to take care of the blisters I was getting. I needed her to do what had to be done and I promised myself I wouldn’t distract her too much so she could get back to work. Although, she was extremely distracting to me to even be near.
Just standing in the same room with her I couldn’t help but imagine what she would look like naked and sprawled across a bed. My mind drifted to the way I would caress her skin and how my lips would take in every inch of her. I certainly wouldn’t let her leave my bed without being totally satisfied.
I loved women. It wasn’t a surprise to most people who knew me that I loved everything about women. But I wasn’t one of those guys who said he loved women but then secretly didn’t respect them in the office or the workforce. I whole-heartedly loved women. The female perspective on things was always different and innov
ative compared to how I viewed a project. I cherished the insights of the women who worked in my company, although I didn’t have nearly enough women there.
Working with airplanes didn’t appear to be a job many women enjoyed very much. I only had one female pilot and a few office employees. I also had one woman that was in charge of my marketing and sales. She was blonde and beautiful and the rich men she pandered to had a very hard time resisting her sales pitch. But I honestly hadn’t hired her because of her looks; I hired her because she sold me on her abilities and that was why I loved women in the workplace.
As far as Sarah and the ranch were turning out, I could already see that both Sarah and her mother Meredith contributed greatly to the running of the ranch. It was their ideas and hard work combined with Sid’s that made the ranch operate as well as it had been going. But I also suspected that Sid wasn’t bringing in the kind of money that he needed to bring in. A ranch had to be a very expensive business to operate and I didn’t see where Sid was optimizing the opportunities at all. He only sold his cows and some smaller livestock but he had thousands of acres of land. There had to be something more useful he could be doing with all that land.
“Sit down and tell me why your hands are gentler than a newborn baby’s,” Sarah said and then started to laugh.
“I guess I’ve just got baby hands.”
“Have you ever worked on a ranch before? Have you ever even worked at all? These hands are absolutely pitiful.”
“No,” I laughed, but then I quickly became aware that I was supposed to be Garrett Reynolds and I had a complete back story that I needed to stick to. “Well, a little, but not this much,” I added. “Your dad has gotten more work out of me here than I think I did throughout my entire years in college.”
I was joking, but it was probably pretty close to being true. Working hard was relative to me. In my real life, I worked hard to build my company and I probably worked twice as much as other people who had normal jobs, but I did my work whenever I wanted. I didn’t have to sit at my desk all day and I certainly wasn’t getting blisters from shoveling horse crap.
“Where are you from?”
My mind hesitated as I tried to remember the history of Garrett. I hadn’t actually had to tell the story to anyone yet. I had successfully avoided any deep and meaningful conversations with people since I had arrived on the ranch. It probably wasn’t the best way to get to know my fellow workers, but I just couldn’t risk messing up the story that I was supposed to know about my own past.
I also had stayed pretty quiet because I was afraid of getting confused and telling people different stories about my past. If I started talking to anyone, I needed to be one hundred percent sure of my story so I wouldn’t look like a liar when I told people bits and pieces about my past.
“Originally from Wyoming, was on my way to Washington, but decided to stay and work for the summer.”
“What’s in Washington?”
“A job.”
“Not one where you use your hands I hope?” Sarah laughed.
Her laugh brightened the room as her smile took over her face. I was sure that any man who had ever laid eyes on that smile had probably tried to land her as his woman. My body even reacted with a stiff hard on as she grabbed one of my hands and started to work on draining the blisters and bandaging me up. I had to resist from flirting with her though, as sweet as she was; there were men who wanted to kill me and flirting with a rancher’s daughter wouldn’t help me in any way.
There were men who wanted to kill me. The thought lingered for a moment as Sarah worked. I had always been a decent guy throughout my life. Never getting too angry or fighting with others. It was odd that there was a man in the world that genuinely wanted me dead. But I knew for a fact that Frank Gordano would kill me if he had the chance. He had killed my pilot and, without a doubt, he would get rid of me too.
I knew more than my pilot Thomas had known. The truth was, if Frank Gordano wanted to kill someone who could hurt him, I was the person to be killed. He shouldn’t have even bothered killing Thomas. But that was why I had agreed to testify. I knew so much about Frank’s business and where his supplies and money were coming and going to. The information I had in my head was enough to put Frank away for life and he knew it.
A bit of panic filled me as I again thought about what life would be like after the trial. I wouldn’t be sitting in a back room with a beautiful woman taking care of me, I’d probably be hiding out and afraid for my life still. It was a sobering thought.
At that moment, I was hiding and I felt safe, but what would happen after the trial? Would I have to give up my old life all together if I wanted to stay safe? How would I survive at all if I couldn’t keep my company?
If I had to sell my company, I could live off of the money for years, but I wouldn’t be happy. I liked working. I liked being busy. I liked building something new and exciting. I felt the anxiety as my chest tightened up. I wasn’t ready to have to testify yet and I wasn’t ready for what my life my look like outside of the safety of the Miller’s ranch. For the time being, I was going to enjoy the safety I had and do my best to avoid thinking about what might come next.
“It’s a little different job,” I said with a smile. “I saw a picture of you in an office. Did you leave that job?”
“More like I was fired.”
“Really?”
“Don’t look so shocked. I wasn’t shocked; I knew it could happen. It’s a tough world out there. If you’re not making money for a company, they have no patience at all and get rid of you. It’s the way of the corporate world. But I was making money for them and they still took it for granted and let me go. Life isn’t fair sometimes, but there’s no time for crying about it.”
“Yeah, money is the root of all businesses and all evil.”
“So what are you hiding from here?” Sarah asked as she looked straight into my eyes.
My stomach sunk as she looked at me. How on earth did she know why I was there? Sid didn’t strike me as the kind of man who would go back on his word and tell my story. He didn’t strike me as the kind of man who would expose me like that. I stared back into her eyes as I tried to evaluate what she might know about me and my situation.
Sarah didn’t appear as if she really did know. The nonchalant way she asked me and looked into my eyes made me think she was fishing for information and didn’t actually have any of her own. But I was still nervous.
“Um, I … uh…” I started to talk but my words just wouldn’t come. I had no idea how to respond to her.
“I’m kidding, jeez,” she laughed. “But with that response, now you have me wondering.”
“I’m just a wanderer. You know. A typical guy who doesn’t like commitment,” I joked.
“In my experience, everyone is hiding from something when they show up here. But I’ll let you keep your secrets for now.”
Sarah held my hand in hers as she continued the process of cleaning out each of the blisters. It was disgusting as the puss, blood, and ooze poured out of my hand. I had to look away to avoid vomiting up my lunch. But Sarah didn’t seem fazed by it at all. She diligently cleaned out each one and clipped the dead skin off; when she was done, my hand was practically one giant open wound.
“I suppose you’re going to throw some vodka on there and kill all the germs off,” I joked.
Sarah reached for a small, white container and a large piece of medical gauze that was sitting right next to her. I watched as she continued to work and only looked up briefly to give me a quick warning.
“It’s alcohol and it’s going to hurt like a bitch; try not to scream.”
“Oh, I think I can handle …” I started to say as she dabbed the alcohol around my hand.
I couldn’t continue talking and avoid swearing and screaming; the pain shot through every nerve in my hand. She was gentle though, and I knew it was for my own good. I had so many open sores on my hands that I was sure to get some sort of infection if they weren
’t cleaned out and bandaged up correctly.
I felt embarrassed that my hands were so destroyed by just a couple of weeks of work. Perhaps I wasn’t holding the shovel right, or maybe I just hadn’t built up a tolerance for that level of work; but either way, it was embarrassing to have my hands covered in blisters and needing the level of care that Sarah was providing to me.
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I said through gritted teeth.
“The rest of the process is easy, if that’s any consolation,” She smiled at me.
Again with that smile; she was mesmerizing. Even in the midst of horrible pain, I felt my throbbing member kept rising to attention at the kindest of glances from Sarah. Luckily I was in jeans and sitting down, because I was certain if I was standing she would have noticed how my body seemed to love her smiles.
She smelled delicious, too. Not like the women in Los Angeles smelled though. Sarah wasn’t covered in perfume and she didn’t have a fake tan on, or fake anything from what I could tell. It was just her natural scent that drove me crazy. I honestly couldn’t get enough of breathing her in and continued to do it as inconspicuously as I could manage as we sat there.
“What’s left? Amputation?” I joked.
“Actually, after I get you all bandaged up, you will probably feel pretty good for the next week or so. Hopefully when your hands heal up they’ll be a little more like man hands and less like little boy hands,” she winked.
I had to laugh. If only she knew the truth about me. The only blisters I had ever had were on my feet after running on the treadmill for too long. My life had admittedly been very comfortable and not physically demanding, but I wasn’t going to complain.
Safety was why I was on the ranch and Sid would have let me lessen my load of work if I had asked him. But I didn’t want less work. Keeping busy was the only thing that kept my mind occupied and I needed that. If I didn’t have my mind occupied, I would have been fixated on Frank Gordano and the threats he had made to my life.