A knock sounded on her door, but she ignored it, instead letting her focus drift outside the window, trying to reach for the shadows. At least with that connection, she felt like there might be something she could do to hide. With the A’ras magic, she couldn’t do anything—she’d barely done anything—but with the shadows, she could hide.
But did she want to?
The knock came again, this time with more urgency. What did it matter if she answered? Likely it was only one of her friends, or maybe even Samis come back to taunt her again, but she was in no mood for that, so she ignored it.
She couldn’t ignore the attack on the palace. As much as it had frightened her—and it had—Felyn had killed her parents. And if the man who just attacked was to be believed, he had killed others like her. Could she sit back and do nothing if she knew?
The knocking stopped and the door opened.
“You are here!”
Carth glanced over to see Alison standing in the doorway. She was two years younger than Carth, but looked twice that. Her blue eyes were so faint as to be almost white, matching her pale skin. Only her hair was dark, nearly jet black and beautiful. Up until a year ago—when Carth had risen far enough within the A’ras to earn her own room—they had been roommates. Now Alison had another roommate, but still came to visit Carth as often as she could.
“I’m here,” Carth said, looking back out her window.
“What happened?” Alison asked, leaning on the foot of Carth’s bed. She didn’t seem to notice the way Carth stared out the window.
“What do you mean?”
“Everyone is talking about how Invar came looking for you!” Alison seemed far more excited about this than Carth, but then Alison had a hard time being anything but excited most days.
“Invar came for me, but that was because of the attack.”
That calmed Alison. “Attack?”
Carth blinked and turned to her friend. Alison sat on the foot of the bed, running her fingers though her long black hair before tucking it into the back of her shirt. “Isn’t that why you came?”
“No. Samis claims Invar wants to teach you. I thought I’d come and find out whether that was true or whether he’s just messing with me. Invar hasn’t taught anyone for years, so why would he offer to teach you? Not that I would blame him for wanting to work with you,” she said quickly.
Carth waved her hand dismissively. “Invar didn’t make any offer to teach me. That’s just Samis reading into the fact that Invar approached both of us when we were near the wall.”
Alison grinned. “What were you doing at the wall with Samis?”
“Not what your mind would think. I was there and he came by. Thought he’d flash himself around without his shirt on, as if it would impress me.”
“It’d impress me,” Alison said.
Carth laughed and stood, going to the window. She leaned out, searching for anything that might indicate the use of A’ras magic. Or any magic, for that matter. It didn’t matter if it was A’ras. What she really worried about was whether she could detect the Hjan magic. Or the Reshian, though she didn’t know what kind of magic they possessed. “I think Samis would impress you dressed for the Nhalin Fjords.”
“I don’t know where that is.”
Carth closed her eyes, remembering the book of her mother’s she’d seen all those years ago with maps to places that were impossible to believe existed, and yet… they must exist, much like Ih-lash existed in more places than her mind. That was her homeland, and though she had no memories of it, her parents had often spoken of it in ways that made her feel like she knew what it had been like.
“North. Far to the north, and across the Saolin Sea.”
Alison laughed nervously. “Are you making that up?”
Carth took a deep breath, thinking of the maps, and the hint of the snow she remembered, like nothing more than a dream, as they had traveled for Nyaesh. She had never understood why her parents had chosen this place—why they had been so determined to reach it—until long after they were gone. She now believed they’d come here so she could study under the A’ras, but what if that wasn’t really true? What if it went against everything they would have wanted for her?
“And what if I am?” she said, forcing a hint of humor into her voice. Alison didn’t need her moping, and there was nothing her friend could do other than try to cheer her up. “You’ve barely ever been outside of Nyaesh, so you wouldn’t even know what the fjords were like.”
Alison grinned. “I’ve read, too. I still think you’re making it up, and I still say that I wouldn’t mind seeing Samis wearing anything.” Her grin faded as Carth didn’t react to her comment. “There really was an attack.”
Carth nodded. “There was.”
“Where? When? Wouldn’t we have heard of it?”
Alison’s concern about the attack would be amusing under other circumstances. The A’ras were tasked with providing a level of protection through the city, and they did so with force, using their magic to provide protection and stability. At least, they had. Now that she had seen the risk that the Hjan posed to the A’ras—twice—she wasn’t sure how much protection the A’ras could really provide.
“The yard. It was after Samis left. I… felt… a buildup of power.” Alison was one of the few who knew of her ability to detect power shifting. Alison arched a brow at her but didn’t say anything. She knew that even with the ability, Carth had only a general ability to detect where the power came from, which was why she had run toward the wall.
“You felt power. And then there was an attack?”
Carth nodded. “I was the first one there. The man who attacked… he managed to get through a breach in the wall.”
“That shouldn’t be possible!”
“I know that.”
“No. You didn’t grow up in the city, so you might not know the history. The walls were placed by the earliest of the A’ras. The masters fortify them every month. They’re designed to keep us safe. That, and to keep others safe from us when we’re practicing.”
Carth hadn’t considered that would be a benefit of the wall, but now that Alison mentioned it, it made sense. The wall would protect those within the city from the students struggling to learn their magic.
“And you say that only one person penetrated the wall?”
“There was only one there. Avera thinks others are coming.” Not Hjan, but something she feared as much.
“Which is why you’ve been sitting here staring out your window. Do you really think there’s anything you could do if there was an attack?”
She didn’t, which was the reason she sat and stared out her window. The fact that there had been nothing she could do against the Hjan attacker… that had left her scared. She had managed to hide, but she hadn’t been able to do anything more. She’d have thought that, after all the years she’d spent here, she would have learned enough to protect herself, but she was just as helpless as she had been when her parents were taken from her. In the months after they were gone, she had learned to use the shadows, but even that wasn’t an option here, not while learning A’ras magic behind the wall.
“Come on,” Alison urged. “You promised me you would work with me this week and not spend all your time with Samis.”
Carth shot her a frown. “I didn’t want to be with Samis. We’ve been paired to practice together.”
Alison grabbed her arm and pulled her up. “Don’t act like you weren’t interested in practicing with him. I’m pretty sure there are plenty of others who would want to work with Samis as well.” She grabbed Carth’s maroon sash, which marked her as an ashai, and waited while Carth tied it on. As she progressed—if she progressed—she would be granted different lengths of sash, until she reached a point where she could choose whether she even wore one. Some masters, like Invar, she had noticed, didn’t bother wearing theirs. Invar didn’t do much that he didn’t want to do.
“I’m only doing what I was asked to do.”
Alison laughed as she reached the door. “That sounds nothing like the Carth I know.”
She hesitated until Carth followed.
Had Alison not come, Carth would have preferred to sit and stare out the window of her room, but that wouldn’t solve anything, nor did it do anything to make her feel any better. In some ways, she felt worse. Not telling Alison about her ability with the shadows bothered her. Ever since Carth had come to the A’ras to study, Alison had been her friend. She was one of the first people Carth had met, and they had made an immediate connection. Not because of shared experiences at the time—Alison was born in Nyaesh, where the A’ras magic was more common, and had always hoped to join the A’ras. Her parents had openly pushed her toward it, whereas Carth’s parents had intended to sneak her into the A’ras but never revealed their plans. Had she known, would she have tried to make it to the A’ras after losing her parents, or would she have done the same as she had and found a place to hide?
Alison guided her out of the cosak until they reached the yard outside. Carth felt the presence of magic pressing all around her, but none of it had the same focus as it did when the masters used it. With the students, and especially with the younger students, the power they used was less coordinated in some ways. There was power—some of the students had enormous potential with their magic—but often none of the same control, nothing like what she’d seen when Invar and the other masters had fought off the Hjan.
“Where are you taking me?” Carth asked.
“I want to see the wall,” she said.
Carth stopped and Alison turned back to face her. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“They repaired it, right?”
Carth nodded. “They repaired it. At least, that’s what they told me. But I don’t think we should go back there.”
She didn’t like the idea of returning to the place she’d been attacked. All it would accomplish would be to remind her of her inability to do anything to stop the man who’d killed her parents, and she didn’t need that reminder. The nightmares she had too many nights were enough for that. At least she’d managed to conceal those from Alison.
“Come on,” Alison urged. “If there’s a whole collection of masters there, we’ll turn back.”
A part of her wanted to return to the wall, if only so she could see if she could reach the shadows again. The breach had disrupted the A’ras magic that prevented her from reaching the shadows. Would she be able to reach past the magic and access that power again?
“Fine, but I’m not going to explain to the masters why we came if we’re caught, so you’ll have to come up with a good reason.”
Alison paled slightly and then laughed. “There won’t be any masters there. How often do they ever make it outside the palace?”
Not often, Carth knew, which made Invar coming into the yard that much more uncommon. She could understand why rumors would spread about him seeking to teach, especially thinking that he had left the palace almost as if to seek her—or Samis, she had to admit—out.
“Besides, you’re almost sai. When you reach that level, you’ll get to leave the grounds and start your first assignments.”
“I’ve got a ways to go before I reach that point,” Carth said. The sai were the first level of A’ras, and they were allowed on assignments, no longer restricted to the palace grounds. Most sai were at least eighteen, but then, most of the sai had been studying with the A’ras since they were eight. Carth hadn’t come until she was twelve.
Alison frowned. “I think you’re closer than you admit. Even the sai A’ras continue their lessons, only they no longer have to remain in the cosak for training. You’re almost there. You’ll be closer if Invar claims you. Once you get a master to work with, you’re basically one of the sai.”
“I’m not like you,” she said. “You’ve been here how many years? Seven? I’ve been here five. There’s still so much to learn.”
Alison shook her head. “You should see the way others watch you, Carth. We all know you have the potential to become one of the masters. All it takes is time—and if Invar chooses you, it won’t take much of that.”
“It’s not potential, it’s speed,” she muttered.
Alison laughed. “So what if it takes you longer to reach your power if you can access more than others when you do?”
“It matters,” Carth said. “If I’m killed before I can reach it, it matters.”
They reached the flat area leading up to the wall where she’d been attacked. As Invar had said, the hole in the wall had been repaired, the stone replaced, and power surged through the walls once more, rubbing against her like a vibration within her blood. It lacked something, though Carth couldn’t quite put a finger on what.
“This was where the attack occurred?” Alison asked.
Carth reached the wall and realized what had felt out of place. Ivy was shredded, with strips of vines and fallen leaves where the wall had been damaged. She ran her fingers along the ivy, wondering if it really had much of an impact on the magic contained within the wall.
This late in the day, the sun cast strange shadows, leaving the ivy with a dappled appearance with dark patches that appeared and then disappeared. Carth felt drawn to these shadows, drawn to run her hand along the vine. Could the vines really augment the magic here?
“Look at this,” Alison said. “When you said the attack had destroyed a section of the wall, I didn’t think you meant a section this large!”
Carth nodded, still focused on the shadows along the wall. They were more prominent than what she remembered seeing before, and she felt compelled to reach for them, to see if her shadow magic would work.
“How do you think they managed to destroy this section of the wall?” Alison asked.
Carth pulled on the shadows before she realized what she was doing. They surged around her, swirling into the shape of the shadow cloak she’d long ago discovered how to form.
Alison looked past her. “Carth?”
Had she concealed herself with shadows? She shouldn’t be able to do that here, not with the A’ras magic holding back that aspect of her abilities. Had the attack somehow freed something for her?
Alison turned away and Carth released the shadows. “I’m here.”
Her friend frowned. “Where did you go? You were here and then… then you weren’t.”
“I was just near the wall. You probably overlooked me.”
Alison frowned, her face making it clear that she couldn’t tell whether Carth played a trick on her, and started to say something when energy burned within Carth, pressure building from the use of magic.
“What is it?” Alison asked.
Carth shook her head. “I don’t know.”
“I’ve seen you make that face before. You felt something, didn’t you?”
She nodded carefully, feeling the release of the power. As she did, she couldn’t shake what Avera had said, and how she thought others would attack again. Had they reached the palace already?
“If you want to go check it out…”
Carth looked toward the palace, then shook her head. That would only expose her to more questions, and after the way the masters had treated her, she wasn’t sure she wanted that.
As they started back toward the cosak, Carth felt the subtle pull of the shadows. Stranger still, it seemed something else pulled against the shadows as well.
All these years and she hadn’t detected it, and now she could. Had the Hjan attack defeated the A’ras ability to suppress the shadow magic, or had the attack changed something for her?
5
The next few days passed mostly in a blur. Carth endured the classes with the instructors and mostly managed to stay away from Samis and his friends, but she couldn’t shake the rumors. Most had heard about the incursion and heard that Carth had been there. It was bad enough that someone had broken through the palace wall—and the rumors about who and how ranged from impossible to ridiculous—but worse that Carth had been t
here for it.
At times, she thought maybe she could reach the shadows again. She’d managed it twice that day, the first time when attacked, and the second when Alison had dragged her to the wall. Since then, she might have tried to reach them, but she hadn’t managed to do so. As much as she wanted to use the shadow cloaking, she wondered if maybe it was better that she didn’t. That way, she could focus on what she was supposed to be doing, and use the power she was supposed to be learning.
Samis approached her on the second day after the attack, finding her near a small copse of trees during a break in the day’s lessons. Carth worked on focusing, trying again to reach for her magic, but was distracted by the tickling sensation of something else at the back of her mind. She didn’t know what that something else was, only that it was there.
“You saw it, didn’t you?” he asked.
Carth, who had been concentrating on her knife, trying to pull the A’ras magic, looked up. As usual, the magic came slowly, but almost more slowly the last few days, as if her entire focus was off, which it was. In order to regain her focus, she needed to study, to sit back and figure out how she could push past the restrictions she seemed to have placed on herself, but she didn’t know how.
Samis was dressed in a loose shirt with the top few buttons open. His maroon sash was tied around his arm, almost too tightly. A part of her wished it would cut off the blood flow to his arm. Maybe that way she could beat him in their little battles, but even then she’d probably fail.
“The attack?” she asked.
Samis sat next to her, shifting his sword off to the side as he did. “Like you really need to ask. That’s all anyone can talk about. You know the rumors have it that it took five masters to fight the attackers off?”
Even though she knew he fished for information, she didn’t care. “It was only one attacker.”
His eyes widened. “One? And they took on five masters?”
“Not five. Three.”
He whistled softly. “Still. Three masters against one. What kind of magic do you think he used?”
The Shadow Accords Box Set: Books 1-3 Page 23