"No, I'm not," I shouted, pissed now. "If it looked like she was playing around, like she had me so overpowered it was almost comical, it's because she fucking did. The only time I managed to hurt her was when I caught her by surprise. And I'll tell you right now that none of you is a fucking match for her either. You think she kicked my ass? She'd wipe the floor with any of you in about five seconds. So don't give me any shit about how I could have tried harder."
"You could have," my mother said. "You know that."
I stared at her incredulously. "Did you not see the part where she tossed me through the sky like it was nothing? Was I the only one who caught that part?"
"Your speech there to the mortals belied your feelings about Nether. You pity her," my mother said, and I could swear, just for a moment, that I felt disappointment from her. "There is no room for pity in the life of a Fury."
Yeah. I was definitely a disappointment.
"You held back," my Aunt Megaera said in agreement. My stomach turned, a combination of my ever-present nausea and the nausea that comes with healing.
"Look. Maybe you're all fucking delusional, but I know what I felt. She's powerful. A lot more powerful than I am—"
"For fuck's sake, kid, you're the daughter of the Lord of the Dead and a Fury. Woman up and stop making excuses," Hades said, raising his voice. I just stared at him in shock. At that moment, the dogs came shuffling into the kitchen and sat on either side of my feet. I felt a torrent of shock from my dad, who was glaring at my mom, who was looking anywhere but at him.
"Where did you get the Netherhounds?" he asked in a slow, deliberate voice.
I shook my head, then looked at my dogs. Kurt and Courtney. Big-ass German Shepherds. "They're German Shepherds, Dad."
He was still looking at my mom.
"Do you know, Tisiphone, how it is that our daughter happened to end up with not one, but two Netherhounds?"
She glared at him. "Shut up, Hades," she snapped, and I felt guilt from her.
"Guys. Holy shit. They're freaking German Shepherds. They wandered up to me one day and just kind of never left. They were starving and all full of fleas and they stunk so bad my eyes watered. Get a grip."
Then I looked at Nain, who just shrugged.
"Those are not German Shepherds. And now maybe we know how it is that our enemies were able to find her, huh, Tis?" Hades said, his voice a low growl. "Not everyone would have a pair of Netherhounds protecting them."
"Protecting me?" I asked with a laugh. "These two are practically worthless. They did nothing when the Puppeteer broke into my house."
"Was the Puppeteer truly that much of a danger?" my father asked.
"Uh, yeah. She broke into my—never mind. I'm not talking about that right now." Too many memories. The sight of Brennan's hate-filled face when she had control of him.
"Tis?" Hades pressed.
"Did you really expect me to leave her here alone, Hades?" she exploded.
I looked between the two of them, both of them tense, angry. I caught Nain's gaze, and he looked as confused as I felt.
"Guys. These dogs are—"
"Lift the enchantment, Tisiphone," Hades said, crossing his arms.
She glared at him. "I couldn't leave her here alone," she repeated, voice softer, sad.
My dad's face softened as well. He dropped his arms to his sides. "I know. But we both know that's likely how Hermes and your sister recognized her, right?"
"Wait. You guys have been around my house. You've seen these dogs before."
"They always take off when I'm around. Have you noticed that?" Hades asked. "Because they know I'd recognize them for what they are." He transferred his gaze to my mom again. "Lift it, Tis."
My mother sighed, closed her eyes, and focused. I could feel her power swirling around us, and, before my eyes, my two German Shepherds, the dogs I'd had since I was nineteen years old, who had lived in my car with me, who had slept in abandoned houses and empty garages with me, who had been my only company for years, transformed.
Their brown and black fur changed, became sleek, almost metallic-looking black.
They grew to about three times their already-huge size..
Their snouts shortened, their teeth sharpened, and their eyes glowed a deep blood-red. Obsidian claws clicked against the kitchen linoleum, and they looked at me with much too much knowledge in their eyes.
"Netherhounds," my dad said, gesturing at them. "I did wonder where they went. I assumed these two had managed to get themselves killed by something in the forest."
My mom just looked away.
I started to talk, stopped. Opened my mouth again. Tried to cap the rage that was fighting to come up. So many fucking lies. So many things hidden from me, over and over and over again.
"So these things were supposed to be protecting me?" I asked, and Nain tensed. He knows my "Oh, someone's about to get hurt" voice better than anyone else.
"Calm down, Mollis," my dad said.
"No. They were supposed to be protecting me, huh? Where were they when I was getting my ass kicked after school every week when I was a kid? Where were they when that sick bastard had me locked in his basement? Where were they when I spent night after night alone on the streets, hoping no one would mess with me?" By the time I was finished, I was shouting and didn't care. "Where were they when that vampire nearly drained me, when the Puppeteer nearly had Brennan kill me, when I got fucking exploded into nothingness? You are so full of shit—"
"Enough," my father thundered, and my mom smothered a sob. I looked at her and immediately felt guilty. Still angry as hell. Still confused. But now I had guilt to add to it. Nain was enraged, and got more so the longer I ranted, and now his eyes were glowing red.
"They couldn't find you until your powers manifested," my mother said softly. "I had hoped it would never get to that point, but it did. And all of the things afterward… Netherhounds are mysterious creatures. They may not have saved you from all of that. Maybe they didn't believe you needed to be saved. Did you never wonder how it was that you slept soundly so many nights when you had so many enemies? Did you seriously think that no one knew where you lived, or that you lived alone? All of that empty land around your old house is likely full of the graves of those who tried to take you by surprise."
"I would have known," I said.
One of the dogs made a low sound, and I looked at it. The larger of the two, the one I had always called Kurt. It made me want to laugh and cry now. My two stray German Shepherds, whom I'd jokingly named after a couple of grunge rock stars. The dog looked up at me, opened its mind, and my psyche was bombarded with scene after scene of the two Netherhounds hunting and ripping the throats from werewolves, vampires, shifters, and witches, dragging the bodies into empty lots. There were no graves, though. From what the Netherhound showed me, the dog I'd known as Courtney, at least, could breathe fire, and the bodies had been incinerated.
"I don't want to talk about this anymore," I said to Hades. "Not now. Take them back to the Netherwoods with you when you go."
The dogs each let out a low growl, sat, obviously offended and stubbornly insisting on staying.
"I am not taking them. They're yours," Hades replied. "But let's get back to more important matters, shall we? Like Nether."
"Okay. That's it. Get the fuck out, now," Nain told him.
"Go, now," Heph said, his voice a low growl as he stood beside Nain. Brennan readied himself to shift.
"If a fight breaks out here, I'm going to kill every single one of you and then we'll see just how much I need to 'woman up.' Get lost," I said, and after a moment of hesitation all of the immortals except for Artemis, Heph, E, and Asclepias disappeared. Meaghan came over toward me, started looking me over.
"I'm okay," I told her. I sat in one of the kitchen chairs and as soon as I was settled, Sean toddled over to me and climbed up in my lap.
"Not now, man," Brennan said, preparing to lift him off of me.
"It's okay. I won't feed
from him," I said.
Brennan stared at me. "Do you seriously think that's what I'm worried about? I know you won't. You're tired and hurting and I don't want him to add to it if he starts jumping around on you."
"It's okay," I said. "And thanks."
"You know damn well I've never believed you're a monster, Molly," he told me, passing the issue.
"I know."
I found hurt and anger in his eyes. Fear still, after what I'd been through with Nether. "Nether told them all I'm a monster. And I was feeding off of those Normals so I could heal. I feel guilty about that."
"You shouldn't, and I know you'd never feed off of Sean," he said in irritation.
"Okay," I said. "So, back to Nether. Do you agree with my parents that I was holding back?"
The room settled into uncomfortable silence.
"You do," I said under my breath. "Are you all insane?"
"Queenie, I've seen you throw gods like Ares and Dionysus around a room and it didn't take any more effort than it would have taken you to swat a fly. I've seen you destroy a Fury with little more than a flick of your finger. It didn't even look like you were fuckin' trying, from what we saw on TV before we rushed outta here."
"When I did that, I was sharing soulspace with Nether," I said. "I had her power in addition to mine. I don't have that anymore. And while she seems to have absorbed plenty of my powers, the only things I got from her were a bunch of nightmares and memories that aren't my own."
Nain was watching me, rage and worry coming from him. He knew about the nightmares, of course. About things that suddenly seemed to trigger anxiety in me in a way they never had before. "Drop it," he growled. "Or I'm kicking all of your asses out, too."
The subject was dropped. E put on a pot of coffee, and we all sat around the kitchen table while I filled them in on what had happened with Nether, what I'd felt from her, what she'd said.
"So I need you all to help me understand something," I said as I finished filling them in. "So one of you can't kill another immortal. They'll resurrect in the Aether or Nether or whatever, even if you destroy the body. What about the Titans?"
Artemis sighed. "We can't kill them, but they can kill us. We lost several in the war with them."
"If we could have killed them, we never would have bothered imprisoning them," Heph said. "Zeus would have had every one of them executed."
"Okay. So what about beings like Nyx?"
"What do you mean?" Heph asked, furrowing his brow.
"I mean, can she kill Titans? Could she kill Nether?"
"Nyx is powerful enough, but she can't kill. She's the Creator. She's not going to snuff out her own creations."
"But she'll let you guys do it to each other?" I asked, and he shrugged. "All right. Well what about Nether? I mean, she nearly killed Aether, right?"
"I think it's kind of like a pyramid, my friend," E said, and I turned to her. "The closer you are to the beginning of creation, to the top, the stronger you are, and the more likely you can kill those that came after you. So Nyx could kill whatever she wanted, but she doesn't kill. Nether and Aether, being her next creations, can kill just about anything that came after them, one would assume. The Titans can kill us, but we can't kill them. And we can kill mortals, but the mortals can't kill us."
"And where do I fit in that?" I asked.
"Well," Heph said, "You're Tisiphone's. And Tisiphone was one of the few beings created directly by Nyx herself. So I think you likely break the rule of not being able to kill those that technically came before you."
"But then my mom should be able to as well," I argued.
"Ah, but you're not factoring Hades' blood into the mix. The daughter of a Fury, a direct descendent of Nyx herself, and the daughter of the Lord of the Dead, a being who has spent his entire existence in the Nether. It's a strange brew, but I'm not surprised it grants you abilities no one else has. This was foreseen, Queenie," he reminded me.
"I know. I just don't think I'm powerful enough to kill Nether. But it sure the hell felt like she was powerful enough to kill me." I paused. "And despite what you all seem to think, I hit her as hard as I could. It just didn't seem to make much of a difference."
Chapter Six
Nain didn't waste much time in getting everyone else out of the house after that. He tried to get me to eat something, and I shook my head, glancing at the no-longer-enchanted Netherhounds before I headed into the bathroom.
I started a bath and stripped off my destroyed clothing, tossed it onto the floor. I'd throw it out later. I climbed into the searing water, giving my wings a disgusted glare as I maneuvered them into the tub. I dipped my head back into the water and got my hair wet, watching as the water turned a pinkish hue from all of the blood in my hair.
Man, scalps bleed a lot, I thought numbly. I rinsed off as much as I could, drained the tub, then filled it with fresh water. I was just about to start shampooing my hair when I heard Nain walk up to the door.
"Are you decent?" he rumbled.
"Nope," I answered.
"Perfect." He pushed the bathroom door open, and his gaze lingered on me. Hunger, always. Every single time the man looked at me, and I felt the same for him. He had that way of making me feel desirable. Wanted. Treasured. And that isn't something you'd expect from a demon, maybe. Brennan had been good at making me feel that way, too, when we were together. But from Nain, it was so much more. I was his mate. His one and only, and we'd fought our way back from death to be together.
I swallowed, tearing my eyes away from him as he started rolling up his shirt sleeves.
"Did you wash your hair yet?" he asked, and I shook my head. "Good." He knelt next to the tub and took the lavender-scented shampoo that I liked off of the corner of the tub. "I've always wanted to do this for you."
"You're a strange man," I murmured, and he smiled a little. I watched as he squeezed a dollop of the fragrant shampoo into his palm.
"You're so tense, baby," he said.
"It's really irritating that you can do that," I grumbled.
"Payback is a bitch, isn't it?"
It was one of the things we'd discovered upon doing the marriage bond again (and again, because the feeling of bonding that way, our blood mingling, our powers marrying, was completely addictive) — Nain could now sense my emotions. Not just my physical state, which had always been part of the demon marriage bond. Now, he could feel when I was angry or scared or happy. For someone like me, who'd spent my entire life trying to pretend to be an absolute badass, it was an adjustment. It made me vulnerable to him in a way that would have terrified me with anyone else.
There were other side-effects of our enthusiasm for the mating ritual. He was starting to show signs that some of my self-healing abilities had transferred to him as well. We were keeping that to ourselves, mostly. I'd confided it to my mother, and she'd said she hadn't heard of anything like that, but that we'd done the bond much more often than was necessary and what the hell was wrong with us anyway?
I'd ignored her.
He put his hands in my hair, and the feel of his fingers gently, yet firmly, massaging my scalp made me sigh in contentment. I closed my eyes and he worked for a while in silence.
"That feels so nice," I said.
Nain finished washing my hair, then he turned on the handheld sprayer and gently rinsed the shampoo from my hair. Absolute focus, as if this was the most important job in the world.
"I love you," I whispered.
He turned the water off and picked up the sponge, soaped it up, and started washing my shoulders and upper back.
"I love you too, Molly," he said. He was tense, worried. Turned on (we always seemed to be, when we were together).
I took a deep breath. "I can't beat her."
He let his gaze wander over my shoulders, down my back. He rinsed my back, then started running his fingertips through my wing feathers, straightening the mess they'd become. Silence stretched between us. I knew this side of him well. This was his "I'm go
ing to withdraw so I can figure this shit out" side. We didn't talk for quite a while, comforted by one another's presence, both lost in our own thoughts as his fingers worked at my wings. Finally, he picked up the sponge again, ran it over my shoulders and down my arms.
"You think she's that much more powerful than you?" he asked.
I nodded. "I mean, I might get lucky if she was distracted and I had the jump on her. It would have to work that way, I think." He nodded, still lost in thought. "And thanks for not acting like I don't want to beat her or something."
"It all comes down to the same thing in the end, doesn't it? If you can't, then you can't." He ran the sponge down my chest, between my breasts, to my stomach. "I think they're all discounting the fact that you lived with her for a long time. Maybe you have a better sense of her than any of us can imagine."
"I'm so tired of this. All of it," I whispered, hating the weakness in my voice. "I'm tired of the lies. The secrets. I just want to end it, once and for all."
He stayed quiet, ran the sponge over my thighs. "Do you think Nether is the end?"
I nodded again. "I mean, really, who's left now? The immortals I know I can deal with if I need to. The spirit daemons mostly just hide from me, and the ones that do step out of line aren't exactly a challenge. God, I sound full of myself."
"No," he said. "You sound like someone who's made it clear that she's the top of the fucking food chain."
"Until now," I corrected him.
"I think everyone's missing something," he said.
"Yeah?"
He nodded, took my hand and helped me stand. He handed me one of the big bath towels, and I wrapped myself in it. We went into the bedroom, and he watched hungrily as I dried off and lay down in bed. He grabbed the bottle of vanilla-scented lotion I'd been using lately, squeezed a dollop into his hand, and started smearing the thick lotion over my legs, long, slow, firm movements that had me trying to remember to breathe.
"Before you totally scramble my brain here," I said, and he let out a low laugh, "what is everyone missing?"
His hands smoothed up my hips, across my abdomen, and I bit my lip, on the edge of losing my mind.
Nether: Hidden Book Five Page 7